Author's Note: Okay, sorry if I confused you with the last author's note. I think most people understood, but some seemed a bit confused as to whether there was another chapter or not. Guess what – there is! This, however (Chapter 11), is the last full chapter of the story. There will be an epilogue of some sort, which I have begun to write, but I may update a couple of other stories before I post the epilogue, since the main body of this story will have been concluded and I've left MIA alone for longer than I intended to.
Also, regarding the idea of a sequel, I have decided (as many of you have agreed) that this story really works best as a stand-alone. So as of now, unless at some point in the future I just happen to come up with some spectacular idea that would be absolutely perfect as a follow up to this, there will be no sequel. Sorry to those who wanted one, and always feel free to send in ideas if you like. You never know what might inspire me to a new story, so suggestions are always much appreciated!
Oh, just to clarify because a few people asked about the imaginary Inuyasha (I knew that would happen…) – no, he was not actually there, he was just a visual representation of Kagome's inner dialogue (yes inner dialogue, because in this case she's essentially having a conversation, as opposed to a monologue in which she would be merely thinking verbally). It was based on a scene from an episode of Friends involving Ross and Rachel, if anyone is curious. Needless to say, it was kinda tricky to translate into narrative, but I couldn't resist (--grin--)!
Thank you all so much for the reviews and everything! A few of you have asked me to read stuff of yours or to email you or whatever, and you have no idea how much I appreciate it. I try to respond to your requests, but (I admit it) I have a really bad memory and I tend to procrastinate, so if you've asked me to review your story or something and I haven't, yell at me please!
sailor-scribe: Of course you would have made it a cliffhanger, oh mighty Queen (--grin--). And yes, you are a celebrity – if I knew what you looked like I'd ask for your autograph (lol)
Fallen-Snow: Did I cut the last chappie of Fourtune's Fool in half too?! I'd forgotten that…you know me so well (--grin--). And you're right about the flashbacks. I should have tweaked them more than I did and done like you said, separating the dialogue and the narrative (you know what I mean). You should have seen them when I first did it – each one was like three paragraphs long, and I was like 'this is ridiculous – I've just copy/pasted the entire story into the last chapter…' (lol). Oh, and I actually thought about putting the flashbacks on the train originally, but then the time jump kinda made that not work so well (--shrugs--). Oh well…live and learn ('and then get Luvs!' – lol…sorry, every time I use that phrase the Luvs commercial comes to mind…). And you know you never annoy me – what would I do without my favorite critic?
pinksakurablossom07: Well, if it's opposite day, I suppose I would have to say 'I hate you too, and I hope you loathe and despise the rest of the story! Never talk to me ever again!' (lol – nope, thankfully no one's ever told me they hated this story…you're the first! --grin--)
Izayoi: I dunno, if you count all his titles Dumbledore's name is pretty long …'Order of Merlin – first class, Supreme Mugwump (lol – I love that one!), etc., etc…' (--grin--)
skylark624: Oooh, I got closer on the spelling than I thought I did – cool! And as far as Kikyo, frankly I do like to write her as evil on occasion, but mainly because I think it's fun to write evil female characters, and she's easy to slant that way; but I also like writing her like this. She's she kind of character I really like to play (as an actress) when I get the opportunity, both as the evil type and the not-so-evil type. (--shrugs--) She's interesting…
Divine-Red-Crayon: Not just a fan, but an uber fan? lol – thanks! Glad I'm keeping you entertained…Arizona, eh? I wouldn't survive long there – even summer in Minnesota is too hot for my taste. I'm more of a winter person, I think. Good luck! (oh, and yes, there's an epilogue)
Christine: Yeah, I guess I went a bit philosophical on that one. No, he wasn't really there, she was just sort of daydreaming, I guess, and a lot of what 'Inu' was saying was meant to confuse her (just for fun). Anyway, if you're still confused after this chapter, ask again and I'll try to clarify it further. (--grin--)
Jan-chan07: I know exactly what you mean about short chapters. I had the same problem with my first story (it was so frustrating!). After that I set a rule for myself that every chap had to be at least 3000 words long (well, unless there's a very good reason to make it shorter…like a cliffhanger, for example. But even so, they're always at least 2500 or so, and only one or two have been under 3000 – most are closer to 4000). Eventually you get used to the length, and you can predict about how long you think a scene will take even before you write it. Glad you like my writing style (that's a huge compliment, honestly) and my grammar (I'm a grammar freak…just ask Izayoi)
Baybe-Dinez: Um…sorry, but I'm not going to be on a soap (I wish I was, but unfortunately not). Maybe you were thinking of someone else? I am going to be in an opera (as in singing, not a soap opera), so maybe that's what confused you. Oh, did I review your story? I can't remember…I'll have to go check. Anyway, thanks!
sailorcrystaldestiny: Thanks! Actually, I really appreciate you saying that my writing has improved since FF – I think it has too. FF was alright, but looking back at it I can see too much of my old middle school writing style, since it was the first thing I'd written since then (about three years previous). And when are you going to update that story? I want to read more – I haven't read any Ranmafics in ages…
antisocial mint: Definitely let me know if you do write that fic and (--puts aside anti-Sang/Inu bias with slight difficulty--) I'll gladly read it. (--grin--)
anime-craziegurl16: Nooo! Call off the squirrels, please! I promise, that wasn't the end!
Lenni: Yay! Someone else made the same mistake! I feel better now! 'The rain in Spain stays mainly on the plane'…lol – it really doesn't make much sense that way does it… Ooh, and that's weird about the songs and stuff. You know, that's the trouble with fanfics, though – you can't put background music in. The closest you can get is a songfic. I'm always thinking of these songs that would compliment a story perfectly, if only I could put them in the background. Oh well…I'll just have to direct movies someday, I guess. Oh yeah, sorry, but I don't know who said the 'love and stoplights' quote. The sign was across the room (in my psych class) from me on the wall, and the name was in small print so I couldn't make it out. If I ever find out I'll tell you though.
Daedreamer: Yeah, I was going for a sort of mix between funny and serious in that scene. It was a bit philosophical, but I wanted to keep it light so it wouldn't drag. Glad you liked it!
Okay, I officially talk waaay too much. Sorry guys if these long review replies bug you or anything…and to think there were even more that I wanted to reply to but didn't because it was getting so long. You know, the way I talk here, who would guess I'm actually the silent, reserved type at school? Weird. Anyway, I love you guys! Here's the chappie (finally)!
Alter EgoChapter 11: The Middle Ground
"Could I
have a scotch on the rocks and a Chardonnay please?" Inuyasha winced slightly
at the sound of the irritatingly over-cheerful voice chirping brightly from
behind him, but he managed to fix a smile to his face as he turned to answer
the young waitress. "Sure thing Koharu," he answered.
"Thanks," she said with a wide grin, and he had to suppress a roll
of his eyes. Why, in the name of all things holy, had Kikyo hired this
air-headed little girl to replace Kagome? She was so innocent and
Pollyanna-esque that even he couldn't bring himself to insult her. Or
perhaps it was more the fact that every snide comment that came to mind seemed
to be one that he had hurled at Kagome on some occasion -- and he refused to
put the two of them in the same category. Besides, he doubted she'd even have
any good retorts to hurl back at him, and that was half the fun.
"Here you go," he said tightly, placing the drinks on the tray
and letting out a relieved breath as the girl practically skipped away.
"Having fun?" Miroku asked as he sauntered over, smirking at the
irritated scowl on the hanyou's face.
"Shut up, houshi," the silver-haired man replied shortly, but
without his usual flare, and his friend cocked his head to one side, watching
him appraisingly.
He'd been like this for the past three weeks or so, ever since
Kagome had left, and quite frankly it was beginning to worry Miroku. It wasn't
like Inuyasha to be so subdued for such an extended period of time. Sure he
would sulk every now and then -- he was a pro at that -- but never before had
he undergone such a permanent change.
"What's up with you lately?" he asked concernedly, though they
both knew full well that it was Kagome. Nonetheless, Inuyasha simply replied,
"None of your damn business."
"Oh come on Inuyasha, seriously," Miroku prodded, "You've got to
snap yourself out of this; I want my friend back."
"I said it's none of your business, dammit. Just leave it alone,
okay, cause there's nothing I can do about it," he finished distemperedly,
turning away to refill a customer's beer.
"Oh no you don't," Miroku pressed. "Jesus, if you love her so
much, why don't you fight for her? It's not like you to just give up like
this."
"I tried," he growled, amber eyes flashing slightly in
annoyance, "I tried everything I could to get her to stay, goddammit, but I
promised her that if she'd only listen, I'd never bother her again -- ever.
I'm not about to go back on the one promise I haven't broken yet. It's over,
and I lost...more like I screwed myself over," he amended wryly, and Miroku
frowned at him.
"Alright," he sighed in defeat, "But if you're gonna give up
you've got to at least try to move on. What do you say we go on a double date
tomorrow night -- I'm sure Sango's got a friend who'd be available on short
notice."
The hanyou gave a short laugh at that and said, "Thanks anyway,
but blind dates aren't really my thing."
"Don't be ridiculous -- when you fall off a horse you've got to
get right back on or you'll never ride again. This is exactly what you
need."
"Since when did you become the expert -- and what the hell have
horses got to do with anything?" he grumped, eying the man incredulously.
"It's an expression, my ignorant friend -- come on, you
know I'm right," Miroku implored.
The hanyou growled petulantly, glaring at the other bartender,
but finally he relented. If Miroku was anything, he was persistent...not to
mention quite clever, and Inuyasha knew he'd end up losing this argument
whether he actually gave in or not. Better to save himself the embarrassment of
getting tricked into it and just agree right off the bat. Besides, he
thought in the back of his mind, maybe he is right.
"Fine," Inuyasha grunted, and Miroku beamed triumphantly. "Now
leave me alone before I change my mind." His friend merely chuckled as he
strolled away.
"Feh."
-- -- --
Note to self, Inuyasha thought miserably, never ever
listen Miroku again -- ever.
The evening had started out relatively well, considering. The
restaurant Sango had chosen was high class with excellent service, and -- since
part of the bargain had entailed that Miroku would pick up the tab -- Inuyasha
ate very well. He had immediately chosen the most expensive item on the
list, if only to spite his friend, but it turned out to be delicious as well.
Sango's friend Yumi was Inuyasha's date, and even he had to admit
that she was absolutely gorgeous. She was tall and slender, with eyes like a
cat's, dark brown hair that seemed to shine in the low light, and the most
perfect of curves in all the right places; in short, she was the definition of
sexy. Not only that, but she appeared to have a brain as well as a body, which
was a combination that Inuyasha had found to be rare -- except in Kagome of
course. But, he admitted reluctantly, to be perfectly frank, this woman was far
more exotic than Kagome could ever hope to be.
The real revelation was that he still preferred the latter.
Despite Yumi's undeniably seductive appearance, he found Kagome infinitely more
attractive. Unfortunately, that line of thinking didn't make it any easier for
Inuyasha to put a certain Miss Higurashi out of his mind, which was really the
point of the evening in the first place.
It had been approximately halfway through the meal when things
first started to go downhill. They were in the midst of a conversation
concerning stock prices -- since Yumi was a broker -- when Inuyasha felt a
light, suggestive squeeze on his right knee. His eyes widened imperceptibly as
he froze in surprise. Sango's too far away, and unless Miroku is hiding a
very big secret, I'm gonna guess that was Yumi. But the woman gave no
visible indication of the action, continuing the conversation without a hitch
as if nothing had happened.
In fact, she seemed so indifferent that he began to wonder if he
had just imagined it -- but that theory went out the window when, a few minutes
later, the hand returned, coming to rest comfortably on his thigh. He choked on
the sip of wine he'd just taken when she gave his leg another light squeeze.
"Inuyasha, are you alright?" Miroku questioned worriedly as
Inuyasha coughed, trying to clear his lungs of the alcohol that had slipped
down the wrong path.
"I'm-" he coughed again, finally managing to rasp, "I'm
fine...don't worry about it.
What could he do? He tried moving his leg aside slightly, but
that only seemed to encourage her, and when he surreptitiously brushed her hand
off of his lap, it was soon replaced by the sensation of a bare foot, traveling
stealthily up his pant leg.
I'll kill Miroku, he thought frustratedly as he struggled
to keep the woman's hands and feet off of him, without looking like he was
being attacked by an army of ants. He had to hand it to her -- she was a pro at
this. To look at her across the table there was no indication whatsoever of
what was going on underneath.
Finally, the check was delivered, and Inuyasha was certain he'd
be home free -- unfortunately that was not the case.
"You two seem to be getting along well," Miroku commented as they
exited the restaurant. "Inuyasha, why don't you walk Yumi home -- she only
lives about a couple of blocks past your place."
The hanyou shot his friend a glare and was met with a smirk and a
glint in the man's eye that told him Miroku knew exactly what had been going on
during dinner, and he was terribly amused by it. Miroku quirked a slightly
teasing eyebrow at his friend's exasperated expression as Yumi looped her arm
through Inuyasha's and pressed in close to his side.
"I think that's an excellent idea," she purred in an alluring
alto voice, while the hanyou was still busy silently promising death to Miroku.
Before he knew it, they were alone on the sidewalk, strolling
toward his apartment.
"I can come up with you you know," she whispered seductively, as
though bestowing upon him a great reward and fully expecting him to accept
without question. "I like you."
"That's alright," he said, trying to keep the aggravation from
his voice and put a bit more distance between them. This woman was really
beginning to get on his nerves. "I'll be fine on my own."
She gave a small amused laugh and cooed patronizingly, "No, I
don't think you understand what I'm saying. I like you. I think we
should spend the night in your apartment. Together."
Inuyasha rolled his eyes and tried again, "No, I don't think you
understand what I'm say-"
"Who's that?" Yumi interrupted curiously, arching a finely drawn
eyebrow as she looked past him toward the front of his apartment building where
a lone figure stood, observing them from the shadows. When she stepped forward
into the light, Inuyasha paled in shock at the very familiar face, staring back
at him stonily, her blue eyes hard and impassive, and suddenly he was acutely
aware of the ridiculously sexy female currently plastered to his arm. Oh
shit.
"Kagome..." he whispered, stunned.
"Sorry I interrupted," the woman in question replied coldly, "I
guess I made a mistake. I'll just be going now." And with that she walked
briskly down the steps and turned down the street away from the couple.
Oh no -- no way in hell was he going to let her get away twice.
"Kagome wait!" he called after her in a voice that betrayed a hint of panic as
he tried to go after her -- but unfortunately he was hindered by the very
stubborn dead weight that still firmly gripped his right arm.
"Oh for god's sake Inuyasha, let her go," Yumi said
contemptuously. Then she trailed an index finger slowly down his chest, trying
to entrance him with her catlike eyes, and murmured, "We've got more important
things to do."
That was when he lost it. "Will you let go of me already, wench?
I don't want to sleep with you, so just take a hint and get the fuck out of
here!" He yanked his arm away and turned to the street, hailing a passing cab
and shoving his date inside along with twenty bucks. "Here, go wherever you
want, but just leave me alone!"
"Fine!" Yumi snapped, obviously quite pissed off herself at this
point -- understandably so -- and she slammed the door shut as the cab pulled
away.
Once the woman was out of the way, Inuyasha didn't waste another
moment before taking off after Kagome at a run. He caught up to her a few
blocks down the street, grabbing her by the arm and turning her to face him.
"Kagome I-"
"Let go of me, Inuyasha," she ground out.
"No," he replied fiercely, "Not this time."
"You promised to leave me alone!" she flung at him, trying to
wrestle her arm out of his grip, but he refused to release her.
"Oh no you don't -- it was your idea to come back in the first
place! I'm just trying to set the record straight on what you saw back there!"
Her voice turned wry, with a note of contempt. "I think it's
painfully obvious what I saw."
"No it isn't!" he insisted, "Look, Miroku talked me into this
stupid blind date and the woman was hanging on to me like an octopus, alright?!
I was trying to get rid of her!"
She eyed him carefully, trying to ascertain the veracity of his
claims. "Really?" she questioned skeptically.
"Yes, really!" he growled back in frustration, and she
discovered to her slight surprise that she believed him.
"Okay, I believe you," she conceded, and his eyebrows raised in
response.
"You do?" he questioned bemusedly, and she nodded shortly,
prompting him to breathe a sigh of relief and release her arm from his
vice-like grip.
After a moment, the silence between them grew heavy with the
memory of their current standing, and the hanyou's expression clouded once
more. Amber eyes regarded with incredulity the woman before him, who had turned
and stepped away slightly, staring down at her hands in thought. "Kagome, what
are you doing here?" he questioned quietly, "I-I thought you said-"
"I know what I said, Inuyasha," she interrupted him, lifting her
head to gaze off across the street as though pondering her words carefully.
"I've been doing a lot of thinking, over these past three weeks,"
she began. "Well, actually I was trying not to think for most of that
time -- up until last night, that is." Taking a breath, she moved her eyes to
meet his, which watched her carefully in slight puzzlement and curiosity, with
just a hint of hopefulness. "I was wrong about some things, I guess. I'm not
saying that what you did was right by any means, but I think I might have
judged you unfairly as well because I was so hurt by what you did. I...I
overreacted and I ran away from the problem, just like I always have -- ever
since I was a little girl." She paused again, glancing down at the sidewalk in
preparation for what she was going to say next.
"The thing is," her eyes met his again, "what I really loved
about Ryoga wasn't all the manners and the chivalry; opening doors for me,
pulling out my chair -- if I'd wanted that, Edward would have been more than
enough."
"Who the hell is Edward?" he questioned suspiciously, brow
lowered suddenly in a scowl.
"That's beside the point," she dismissed quickly with a small
wave of her hand. "Anyway, what I realized last night, when I finally got
around to thinking things through, is that maybe I...maybe there was more of
Ryoga in you than I thought there was. I was so determined to see you the way
I'd always seen you that I failed to consider the possibility that deep down,
it was the real you that I was seeing in him."
"That's what I was trying to tell you-" Inuyasha began, taking a
step toward her, but she silenced him with a finger to his lips.
"Please- I know that now," she conceded, "I just didn't believe
it at the time. I guess all I really needed was time to figure it out for myself."
Her hand returned to her side and her eyes lowered as a silence fell between
them, broken only by the sound of raindrops beginning to dot the pavement. What
began as a light drizzle continued to increase in strength as time stretched
on, but neither seemed to take notice as the water seeped into their hair and
clothes.
For a moment he merely observed her, trying to read her intent,
and she could practically feel his gaze upon her. Finally he asked her, with
some trepidation, "So what does this mean?"
A soft smile spread across her lips at that and she raised her
eyes once more, this time shining with their former luster as they met his. "It
means...I've decided to give you a second chance," she answered, smile turning
into a wide grin as his amber eyes flared to life with relief and happiness.
Inuyasha's heart leapt at the words, the weight of guilt and
longing that had plagued him almost constantly for over a month lifting from
his shoulders at last. He raised his hands to her cheeks, brushing aside the
wet strands of ebony hair with his fingertips and gazing deeply into her eyes
with such intensity that he felt he would burst from it. Finally he couldn't
resist any longer and captured her lips with his own, tasting her with out even
a trace of guilt for the first time as she responded willingly, without
confliction. This was right; this was home.
Kagome wound her arms around Inuyasha's neck, tangling her
fingers in his damp, messy silver locks as he worshipped her lips with a
passion. She delighted in the taste of him as it mingled with the sweet
rainwater that ran down their cheeks, seeping into the kiss. The instant she'd
said it and seen the look in his eyes, she knew in her heart that she'd made
the right decision. Whether amber or brown, Inuyasha's eyes were like windows
to his soul, and despite his brash facade she could read him like a book once
she had figured out how to read between the lines. In hindsight, as she'd
realized during the train ride home, even in some of their bitterest arguments
the meaning behind his words often went much deeper than she ever would have
guessed, probably even deeper than he was aware of, and she had simply
been too blind to see it.
He finished with a light, affectionate nibble to her lower lip
before drawing back to rest his forehead against hers, their noses touching. "I
missed you," he whispered, and she smiled back at him, saying quietly, "I
missed you too."
He tucked a strand of wet hair behind her ear and she shivered
slightly, the wetness finally getting to her and giving her a chill. "We should
go inside and dry off," he suggested, and she nodded in agreement, allowing him
to slip an arm around her waist and leaning into him as he lead her back up the
street and up the steps to his apartment building.
"So...Inuyasha," she began conversationally, a sly, teasing sort
of smirk playing across her face and in her voice. "Did you really mean it when
you said you wanted to 'spend your whole fucking life' with me?"
The hanyou faltered slightly, thrown off guard. "Um..." he
mumbled unsteadily, "I...uh...I-" but he broke off when he heard Kagome's
stifled snicker as she shook slightly in suppressed laughter. "What's so
funny?" he asked defensively, glaring at her, but she only bust out laughing,
unable to control herself any longer, and slipped into the building ahead of
him.
"You are," she said simply, as though stating the obvious,
turning back to face him in the building's deserted entry hall, her eyes alight
in amusement at his scowl. "You know, you're adorable when you scowl like
that."
He raised an eyebrow. "Oh am I?" he replied, grinning smugly as
he approached her and looped an arm comfortably around her shoulders to lead
her up the stairs. "Well I'll just have to do it more often then."
"More often? Is that even possible?" Kagome replied
sarcastically.
"Feh. I'll make you a deal: I'll answer your question if you tell
me who the hell this Edward guy is."
She laughed once more at the way he growled the name, as though
Edward were an insect buzzing around his ear. "Don't tell me you're jealous
already," she teased. "Well, let's just say you weren't the only one to be
talked into a blind date."
When he shot her a look that said quite plainly, 'And...?' she
shook her head and elaborated. "Alright fine. He's a handsome, wealthy,
respectful, brilliant young political philosopher/literary genius/wine
connoisseur/Oxford graduate that my mother set me up with the other evening,
and he positively bored me to death. Happy?" she finished with an amused smile.
"Very," he replied, nodding in satisfaction. "Oh, and by the
way," he added casually, flashing her his most characteristic half-smirk, "I
did mean it."
Kagome froze in mid-step, eyes going wide as she gaped after the
hanyou, who continued walking down the hall. "Really?" she squeaked in
disbelief as she caught up with him, turning him to face her.
"Really," he confirmed with a sincere smile, "But lets take
things one step at a time."
He looped his arm around her once more and led her into the
apartment, fetching her an old sweatsuit of his to change into out of her wet
clothes before directing her to the bathroom. As she changed, she recalled with
a smile a thought she had had once, before she'd even met 'Ryoga'.
'Seems like they're all either sweet but dull, or interesting
but obnoxious. What's a girl supposed to do?
If only there were someone in between...'
She cracked open the door and peered out across the living
room to observe Inuyasha, clad in a plain white t-shirt and a pair of dark
flannel sleep-pants, as he carefully built a fire in the fireplace, swearing
occasionally when he burned himself in the process.
"Ow! - shit," he grumbled frustratedly once more, and she smiled
affectionately as it reminded her of the way he had sounded the day he'd tried
to cook for her and managed to plaster the dinner all over the kitchen. He's
sweet on the inside, but he's temperamental as well, not acquiescent -- which
makes him interesting. He get's jealous easily, but it's so adorable I just
have to laugh, and it's impossible to take it as anything but a compliment.
Well what do you know...the middle ground does exist...
-- -- --
A/N: Well, what do you think? As I said, there's an epilogue on the way, but probably not until after I update MIA, at least. Ta ta!