'Lo! Now to get into the story after that very short prologue, here's
chapter one of Harry Potter and the Quest for the Forbidden Cheese Wheel....
Chapter 1: Myths
"Once a not too long time ago," Professor Sheridan Craft began to tell the Hogwarts students that were gathered in the Great Hall. The floating candles and the ceiling that is enchanted to look like the sky outside, was overcast and stormy-looking dimly lighted the hall. The students all sat on large, red, velvet pillows, and were waiting anxiously to hear about the myths and legends Professor Craft had to tell. "In a place across the Atlantic Ocean, two young women about fifteen years of age, by the names of Eva and Andrea, decided to attend a medieval fair in their small town of Miles-ford. When the two young women, in their medieval garb, arrived at the fair, they met many people. One of these people was a man of about twenty years that they learned to call, Sketchy At Best. The young women never actually learned this man's name, but he kept talking to them anyway.
"So fair maiden, Andrea, are you enjoying the fair?" The man dressed as a black knight said. "Oh yes, it is a lot of fun," replied the tall, blonde Andrea. "How would you like to have even more fun?" He motioned to the woods. "No thank you!" She turned and ran back to her friend Eva, the short, dirty- blonde haired girl, and told her the whole story. "Wow, he's really sketchy at best! Hey! We should call him that!" "Okay!" "And that children is the story of Sketchy At Best. Now to get on to the next story . . ." She started to go on to the next story, but the children started to talk quite loudly after she finished 'The Tale of Sketchy At Best.' She looked at them sternly trying to get them to quiet down; her efforts were fruitless. She sighed, and said "now children, calm down!" No one heeded her call. "Children, please listen to me!" She stood up straight and pulled out her wand. "If you won't listen to me," she began, "maybe this will get you unruly students to pay attention."
AN- maybe I should stop here just to piss everyone off . . . Oh yeah and this is a true story, The Rogue Prince is Andrea, and I'm Eva, this are the names we use icky Spanish class...
Now where was I . . .
"Icafaclesirmisle!" AN- look out for The Rogue Prince's Harry Potter and MJ's Revenge and you'll find out about what this word really is Professor Craft yelled this spell, and the entirety of the Great Hall was filled with an extremely bright light. Many students started to panic in their blind confusion, but before a massive mob could play 'Let's Attack Each Other Even Though We Can't See Anything,' Professor Craft bellowed, "SIT DOWN NOW!" Then the room finally when silent, and when the bright light had faded, everyone noticed that miraculously Neville Longbottom was hanging from an unlit torch on the wall.
"How on earth did this happen? Come on now children, tell me. Do it! Do it! (AN- sorry guys 'do it' is a somewhat inside joke from me and my friends in 'Miles-ford') Children tell me now! Who put Mr. Longbottom on the torch?" After no one raised their hands, Craft finally said, "Fine then, if you don't want to tell me, I won't tell you my favorite story, which is the best by far."
"Oh, Professor?"
"Yes, Longbottom?"
"Umm, no one put me up here."
"Then how did you get up there?"
"I sort of tried to cast a spell, but it didn't work the way I wanted it to."
"And what spell were you trying to use?"
"Spongify."
"You need Spongify tiles to use that spell properly, otherwise you end up bouncing all over if you don't."
"I'm sorry, Professor."
"It's alright. Now let's get you down from there." She lifted him from the torch, and when he got down, Neville quickly had to leave the Great Hall because everyone was laughing hysterically at his mistake. "Oh poor child . . .Now back to the stories, there was a man from Nantucket . . ." She continued on with this short saying, and some of the children seemed to enjoy it, others had looks of horror on their faces. "Oh dear, I'm sorry children. I didn't think that would offend anyone. But now we should probably try a myth rather than sayings like the last one. Hmm, which one though? There's the Legend of Sleepy Hollow, 'This One Time At Band Camp,' why Keith Richards is still alive," she listed many more, and finally got to, "how about The Myth of the Forbidden Cheese Wheel? Oh, yes. I believe that that is a good one. Has anyone heard this tale before?" No one raised his or her hand, "oh good! Then it will be new and exciting for all of you! Now once upon a time, there was a good king and queen, and they had three children, there names are not important, but there were three of them. Nasty little buggers . . . Anyway, the king and queen hired a nanny to watch over their children. This nanny was an Animagus; does everyone now what that is? Good. Well, the nanny could change herself into a cow, and one day a farm boy mistook the nanny for one of the royal cows and milked her, and made cheese from her milk. Before the farm boy could sell the cheese of the nanny though, the king heard of what happened; because the nanny told him that anyone who had milk or cheese from her would forever be all-powerful and have the most money ever, the king himself went to the farm boy, and told him what the nanny had told him. The boy was amazed, and when the king asked for the cheese wheel, the boy refused. The two quarreled, over the cheese, and in the end the king beheaded the boy with a haddock from the nearby river. How this happened, now one is sure, but it happened nonetheless. So, because the king had the cheese he became all- powerful, and very rich. Many tried to get the cheese wheel from the king, but all failed. One night the king was warned that someone was going to try to kill him, so he hid the cheese wheel in a place that no one to this day has found were the illusive forbidden cheese wheel is hidden. So we're going on a field trip to find it!"
"Really!" A few people yelled.
"No!" she said with a cheerleader-like enthusiasm in her voice.
"Oh," the children moaned.
Chapter 1: Myths
"Once a not too long time ago," Professor Sheridan Craft began to tell the Hogwarts students that were gathered in the Great Hall. The floating candles and the ceiling that is enchanted to look like the sky outside, was overcast and stormy-looking dimly lighted the hall. The students all sat on large, red, velvet pillows, and were waiting anxiously to hear about the myths and legends Professor Craft had to tell. "In a place across the Atlantic Ocean, two young women about fifteen years of age, by the names of Eva and Andrea, decided to attend a medieval fair in their small town of Miles-ford. When the two young women, in their medieval garb, arrived at the fair, they met many people. One of these people was a man of about twenty years that they learned to call, Sketchy At Best. The young women never actually learned this man's name, but he kept talking to them anyway.
"So fair maiden, Andrea, are you enjoying the fair?" The man dressed as a black knight said. "Oh yes, it is a lot of fun," replied the tall, blonde Andrea. "How would you like to have even more fun?" He motioned to the woods. "No thank you!" She turned and ran back to her friend Eva, the short, dirty- blonde haired girl, and told her the whole story. "Wow, he's really sketchy at best! Hey! We should call him that!" "Okay!" "And that children is the story of Sketchy At Best. Now to get on to the next story . . ." She started to go on to the next story, but the children started to talk quite loudly after she finished 'The Tale of Sketchy At Best.' She looked at them sternly trying to get them to quiet down; her efforts were fruitless. She sighed, and said "now children, calm down!" No one heeded her call. "Children, please listen to me!" She stood up straight and pulled out her wand. "If you won't listen to me," she began, "maybe this will get you unruly students to pay attention."
AN- maybe I should stop here just to piss everyone off . . . Oh yeah and this is a true story, The Rogue Prince is Andrea, and I'm Eva, this are the names we use icky Spanish class...
Now where was I . . .
"Icafaclesirmisle!" AN- look out for The Rogue Prince's Harry Potter and MJ's Revenge and you'll find out about what this word really is Professor Craft yelled this spell, and the entirety of the Great Hall was filled with an extremely bright light. Many students started to panic in their blind confusion, but before a massive mob could play 'Let's Attack Each Other Even Though We Can't See Anything,' Professor Craft bellowed, "SIT DOWN NOW!" Then the room finally when silent, and when the bright light had faded, everyone noticed that miraculously Neville Longbottom was hanging from an unlit torch on the wall.
"How on earth did this happen? Come on now children, tell me. Do it! Do it! (AN- sorry guys 'do it' is a somewhat inside joke from me and my friends in 'Miles-ford') Children tell me now! Who put Mr. Longbottom on the torch?" After no one raised their hands, Craft finally said, "Fine then, if you don't want to tell me, I won't tell you my favorite story, which is the best by far."
"Oh, Professor?"
"Yes, Longbottom?"
"Umm, no one put me up here."
"Then how did you get up there?"
"I sort of tried to cast a spell, but it didn't work the way I wanted it to."
"And what spell were you trying to use?"
"Spongify."
"You need Spongify tiles to use that spell properly, otherwise you end up bouncing all over if you don't."
"I'm sorry, Professor."
"It's alright. Now let's get you down from there." She lifted him from the torch, and when he got down, Neville quickly had to leave the Great Hall because everyone was laughing hysterically at his mistake. "Oh poor child . . .Now back to the stories, there was a man from Nantucket . . ." She continued on with this short saying, and some of the children seemed to enjoy it, others had looks of horror on their faces. "Oh dear, I'm sorry children. I didn't think that would offend anyone. But now we should probably try a myth rather than sayings like the last one. Hmm, which one though? There's the Legend of Sleepy Hollow, 'This One Time At Band Camp,' why Keith Richards is still alive," she listed many more, and finally got to, "how about The Myth of the Forbidden Cheese Wheel? Oh, yes. I believe that that is a good one. Has anyone heard this tale before?" No one raised his or her hand, "oh good! Then it will be new and exciting for all of you! Now once upon a time, there was a good king and queen, and they had three children, there names are not important, but there were three of them. Nasty little buggers . . . Anyway, the king and queen hired a nanny to watch over their children. This nanny was an Animagus; does everyone now what that is? Good. Well, the nanny could change herself into a cow, and one day a farm boy mistook the nanny for one of the royal cows and milked her, and made cheese from her milk. Before the farm boy could sell the cheese of the nanny though, the king heard of what happened; because the nanny told him that anyone who had milk or cheese from her would forever be all-powerful and have the most money ever, the king himself went to the farm boy, and told him what the nanny had told him. The boy was amazed, and when the king asked for the cheese wheel, the boy refused. The two quarreled, over the cheese, and in the end the king beheaded the boy with a haddock from the nearby river. How this happened, now one is sure, but it happened nonetheless. So, because the king had the cheese he became all- powerful, and very rich. Many tried to get the cheese wheel from the king, but all failed. One night the king was warned that someone was going to try to kill him, so he hid the cheese wheel in a place that no one to this day has found were the illusive forbidden cheese wheel is hidden. So we're going on a field trip to find it!"
"Really!" A few people yelled.
"No!" she said with a cheerleader-like enthusiasm in her voice.
"Oh," the children moaned.