DISCLAIMER: No! Too painful to say – go and see other chapters.

A/N: # Song # Ah, yeah. I don't own the songs but I can sing them. I apologise if this chapter makes no sense whatsoever. Aye, another shortie. Anywho, replies to reviews:

Jupiter's Light: You ok? I mean, do you need to go to a mental health clinic? I have a feeling the answer will be no. mwahahahaha!! The rum! I know it's super, it always is! Ok, tha's complete crap. Still, I'm glad you like it. Sorry this one is so short, they are getting longer – I've already written way ahead. Thanx! Argh! Swash, Swash, Buckle, Buckle!!

Alassea 2: Ye don't have much to say for yourself, do ye? Therefore, I can't write back much. Thank you for reviewing, I'm glad ye think it's good... and... funny.... Um, any other description I've missed from your review?

Elvenstorm: Dude, cool name (;P) I am WRITING MORE NOW – I'm already on chap. 21. Don't ask, I have a very sad life. Yeah, Strider will be coming in any chappie now. 11, I think. Soz for the wait! (see you on sun)

Elotiardactyl: Heya, yuh, it was meant to be that, yuh she is kinda, too stupid to be real but then, when you read the other chapters, you'll find out why (I think).

NOTE TO EVERY READER: Seeming as I've already written chappie 23, I'm going to start updating much sooner until my updating catches up with my writing, savvy? But that doesn't mean you lot skip reviewin'! lol

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Chapter 7 - No Escape

I completely forgot everything around me.

Keikæ: Bex!

She was still unconscious.

"What's this?" I heard a voice say, "A pirate caught off her guard?"

I felt cold steel at my throat.

"We thought you'd come back for your friend."

Of course. God, that trick was so simple it would've fooled a schoolgirl. A blonde one at that. I needed to think, and fast.

::The French!::

Well, it had worked for Jack.

Keikæ: Puhluley....

He sounded confused.

Keikæ: Puhlulehvoos....

I didn't dare look up.

Keikæ: Parleli, parsmi, pasley, parle, parle....

"Parley?" I looked up.

Keikæ: Parley! That's the one. Parley! Parley!

"Parley? What's that supposed to mean?"

Keikæ: It means: You have to let me go free.

::You liar, Keikæ.::

"And who invented this 'Parley'?"

I put my finger on the end of the sword, pointing it down.

Keikæ: That'd be the French – Latin based of course, makers of mayonnaise....

::Shut up Keeks – This rambling is going to get you killed. Just find out what they want.::

"We want to know what a pirate and her sidekicks are doing in the woods of Lothlorien." He replied.

Not noticing that he had replied to what I'd been thinking, I continued.

Keikæ: Woah, hold your horses there – I'm in Lothlorien?

He didn't speak. He didn't nod. He didn't move in any way. He didn't need to. (A/N Dude! That is such a crap line!)

"I think we should let these 3 sleep on what they've just found out." He said.

Keikæ: Wonderful. Just bloody wonderful.

We were escorted to single-roomed cells that were empty, save the bed. I was on my own. Held by the collar, I trudged in. And pulled back out again, handed over the keys I had just nicked and trudged back in again. Ignoring the bed, I lay down on the floor began to think. Of all the bets over the years, of our flat in London and of my 2 best friends in the next cells, who had saved my skin a number of times.

::Yeah well – I do save their asses quite a lot.::

Then, our way of life would have to change eventually. Bored, I began to sing:

# Lay awake, I don't give a shit, If I even ever wake up in the morning. Down below, There's a pile of sin, #

I was surprised to hear a voice join in:

# Always waiting for a, waiting for a warning. #

::Bex.::

Keikæ: Bex! You're awake!

Bex: Whatever, you're only suppose to be quoting Jack. I didn't know he sang Offspring in Pirates of the Caribbean.

Keikæ: You said that anything I said had to be one of Jack's lines. Not anything I sang.

Another voice joined in the conversation.

Laila: Still. Don't you think we should sing something a bit more... piratical?

I grinned insanely.

# We pillage, we plunder, we rifle, we loot, Drink up me 'earties yo ho! We kidnap and ravage and don't give a hoot, Drink up me 'earties yo ho! Yo ho yo ho a pirates life for me! #

Bex: Really bad eggs!

Keikæ: Drink up me 'earties yo...

"Woah!" We chorused.

Laila took on the voice of a very drunk Elizabeth.

Laila: You know Keeks, it must've been terrible for you to be locked in a cupboard over Christmas.

I knew she was referring to the BIG row when I was 10, which I had with my parents – it had cost me 2 weeks in the cupboard. That was when I ran away.

Keikæ: Oh, yes. But the company is infinitely better than last time, I think.

::Bex, shut up – I can hear you laughing::

Keikæ: And the...the scenery has definitely improved.

::No WAY – this is getting way kinky.::

Bex burst out laughing, startling the guard. I looked at the guard. There was something odd about him. He was the one I had met by the lake and had caught me when attempting to unsuccessfully rescue Bex. I knew I had never met him in my life, but I still recognised him from somewhere.

Keikæ: Shut up Bex, don't even go there. Ok – most embarrassing moment... Laila?

Laila: Bex, you go first.

Bex: Ummm.... At the bar on New Years Eve?

Laila: That wasn't embarrassing! At least, not for you it wasn't.

Bex: Fine. I'll pass on that one. Er... Keikæ?

"Aye?" I stopped laughing. Bex sounded serious and she only called me Keikæ when she was concerned or wanted something. Laila was also silent. The next thing Bex said I certainly did not expect.

Bex: Who are you? I mean, I know Keikæ ain't your real name. What happened?

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Sorry it's so boring. The next one will probably a bit like that too. And the one after that. But I'll try to make the one after that one better. The characters have a lot of explaining to do. Yes I will get them out of there and on the road soon. Yes I do know it's chapter 7 and you still haven't met the fellowship. Will you please review?

ASSBB!!

Kess ;P