A/N: WoWoOwOwOwoWoW

Ova 60 reviews!! Thankies!!

Jupiter's Light: wOwOOoOo... Thanx!! (are always this hyper?)

Kumarasga23: Sorry! I dint mean to insult u! Sorry!! Please don't kill me!! I'm really sorry! (seriously, I am, I dint no I was insulting you)

Lothliana: I am! And I'll probably get another 1 up before too. I read some of your stories, though I didn't get time to review them. They're well good! Keep writing and reading!

Alassea2: Was that a gentle hint to get the song into the story? I don't know it, but I've got the lyrics, which look veeeeeeery weird and I will put it on if u like :) Email me.

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Chapter 15 - First Taste of Battle

Having nowhere else to go, I ran in the direction of the stables, where I found Legolas and Gimli. God knows where Aragorn was.

Gimli: And where have you been?

At this point, I was tempted for the storyline to go a bit like this:

Keikæ: None Of your damn business. Keep ya oversized Dwarven nose away from where it doesn't belong Midget.

However, I figured this probably wouldn't go down too well, so instead, I said:

Keikæ: I've been up at the hall. Why?

Legolas: Just... wondering. What were you doing up there?

::That was way too casual. Bit curious for an elf.::

Keikæ: Talking, mostly.

::You know exactly what I've been doing.::

Legolas: Yes... Come, we are leaving.

::Whatever. This must be the first time Elf and Dwarf have... schemed together. They've got something up their sleeve, and I don't know what it is, but I get a feeling I'll find out soon enough.::

We joined the ever-lengthening column.

-x-x-x-x-x-

I strolled beside Gimli, who was on a horse, chatting with Éowyn who was leading it by the reins. Aragorn had reappeared and the Rohirrim refugees were now well on the way to Helm's Deep. I tried to stay out of the conversation. Ha. I failed miserably.

Éowyn: And what of your past, Keikæ. Where are you from?

Keikæ: Ok. I hope you've got a while, cos this is going to take quite a bit of time to explain. Brief pause, look stupid, continue when nobody challenges you Right. I'll start from the beginning, then.

::Well where else would you start?::

I told them my story of our flat in London, miniature illegal adventures and any other stupid things I've done in my past. Yuh, I know, real sad, but I couldn't think of anything else to tell them. After many questions, I finally got to falling into Middle Earth, my encounters with Elves and anything else I had forgot to mention. I tried to avoid questions regarding how I already knew of Middle Earth and everybody's names. I had a feeling that would just lead to further complications.

Gimli: It's true you don't see many Dwarf women. And in fact, they are so alike in voice and appearance, that they're often mistaken for Dwarf men.

Éowyn smiled at this and looked back at Aragorn, who was currently fulfilling his ranger name of 'Strider'.

Aragorn: Gestures and whispers It's the beards....

::I'd forgotten that bit of the film.::

I grinned.

Gimli: And this, in turn, has given rise to the belief that there are no Dwarf women. And that dwarves just spring out of holes in the ground!

Éowyn began to laugh.

Gimli: Hehehe! Which is of course ridiculous... Whoa!!

The horse suddenly reared up and galloped away as Éowyn dropped the reins. Gimli toppled off after a short distance and landed with a loud thump. Éowyn rushed off after him.

Gimli: Struggling to get up It's alright, it's alright. Nobody panic. That was deliberate. It was deliberate.

By now, Aragorn was riding next to Théoden.

Théoden: I haven't seen my niece smile for a long time. She was a girl when they brought her father back dead. Cut down by Orcs. She watched her mother succumb to grief.

Éowyn ran to help Gimli up. She laughed as she brushed him off and looked back at Aragorn with the sun behind her and the wind in her hair. (A/N: Throws up No I'm not the kinda person who likes putting that kinda stuff in. It's like in a cheesy movie, and much as I love lotr and it is NOT a cheesy movie, I must say, when they put it in slow motion, it really makes me feel sick.) At that particular moment, Aragorn seemed to be enchanted by Éowyn's light-hearted image.

Théoden: Then she was left alone, to tend her king in growing fear. Doomed to wait upon an old man, who should have loved her as a father.

As Éowyn gazed upon Aragorn, her smile slowly disappeared.

We stopped at some random place that I didn't know. Well, they didn't tell you where they made camp in the films so you can't exactly blame me. I was sitting next to Aragorn who was working on his sword, waiting for Éowyn to approach him with a cooking pot and a plate. I didn't have to wait long.

Éowyn: Gimli?

Gimli: No, I couldn't. I really couldn't.

She passed Gimli and continued towards Aragorn.

Éowyn: I made some stew. It isn't much, but it's hot.

Éowyn filled a bowl and presents it to Aragorn. She gave him a spoon and he nods.

Aragorn: Thank you.

Éowyn: Keikæ?

::Can't be much worse than Laila's.::

Keikæ: Yes please.

I answered very enthusiastically. Whilst Aragorn attempted to firgure out what the meat was, I took a large spoonful, and swallowed it, with out tasting. I smiled, nodding very enthusiastically.

Keikæ: mmm... Dude, that is delicious. Seriously! Absolutely brilliant.

Éowyn smiled, obviously pleased with my reaction.

Éowyn: Oh, thank you. Most people try to stay away from my cooking.

::Hmmm... I wonder why?::

Keikæ: It's just because they don't like to try things that are new. Either that or they're jealous.

Éowyn smiled again.

::This is really mean, Keeks.::

Keikæ: Lord Aragorn. You haven't tried yours.

Not knowing what he was letting himself in for, Aragorn put some strange white meat on his spoon and chewed it, looking up at Éowyn who, despite what I had said, looked a bit disappointed and waited eagerly. He swallowed it – with difficulty – with an expression on his face that was worth an Oscar. He nodded.

Aragorn: Hmmm... It's good.

::Poor guy.::

Éowyn: relieved Really?

Éowyn turned around and left. I leant over to Aragorn, whispering, as he made to pour away the rest.

Keikæ: Don't even think about it.

Aragorn paused in slight confusion, and Éowyn turned around.

Keikæ: Ya see.

Éowyn: My uncle told me a strange thing. He staid that you rode to war with Thengel, my grandfather. But he must be mistaken.

Aragorn: King Théoden has a good memory. He was only a small child at the time.

Éowyn: Then you must be at least 60.

Aragorn looked a bit embarrassed.

Éowyn: Seventy? You cannot be 80!

Aragorn: Eighty-seven.

Aragorn was embarrassed, Éowyn was astonished and I was amused. She then realised the truth.

Éowyn: You are one of the Dúnedain. A descendant of Númenor, blessed with long life. It was said that your race has passed into legend.

Aragorn: There are few of us left. The Northern Kingdom was destroyed long ago.

Éowyn: I'm sorry. Please, eat!

Aragorn made to continue his meal his meal as Éowyn left. Of course, he didn't do that, he poured it away at the first chance he got, before leaning over to me, whispering.

Aragorn: How can you do that?!

I pretended to ignore him for a second.

Keikæ: Oh, sorry, were you talking to me?

It was bit obvious he was talking to me, but I played stupid anyway. He obviously didn't fall for it.

Aragorn: Why do you lie so much?

Keikæ: Hey! I was not lying.

Aragorn: I find that very unbelievable, but I will say that you're very good at it.

Keikæ: Oh. Well firstly, thank you. And secondly, I was not lying.

Aragorn looked slightly confused.

Aragorn: How could you eat that and still be smiling?

Keikæ: Trust me on this one. Have you ever tried Laila's cooking?

He shook his head.

Keikæ: Keep it that way. Seriously, if you give Laila a pot and ingredients, you can guarantee you won't be feeling to good about it later.

Aragorn: How bad is it? Her cooking, I mean.

Keikæ: It's bad. 'Bout 10 times worse than that. In the kitchen, she is a walking disaster area. That's why I haven't let her near the oven for 3 years. Get this – she literally blew up the Microwave. I mean, it's impossible to muck up those meals – you just stick in the microwave for 5 minutes and I mean, ok, it's one thing to cover the inside of the bloody thing in that night's dinner, but Laila somehow manages to plaster the whole kitchen in the stuff.

That night, I crept up near to where Aragorn was sitting, smoking his pipe. I'll give you three guesses of what he was thinking about.

::Ok, Keeks, you have two choices: 1. You be REAL mean. 2. You disappear. 3. You act all freaky and know-it-all, like you have been acting for most of this journey, although Aragorn's not yet twigged. Ok. Eenie, meenie, miini, Jeffery, out she goes. Number 3 it is, then.::

Aragorn whispered words so quietly, not even an elf would be able to hear them. (A/N: She couldn't hear him, but her timing was perfect and she knew exactly what he was thinking.)

Aragorn: Dolen i vâd o nin. [My path is hidden from me.]

::Here goes.::

It was barely more than a whisper, but just loud enough for him to hear.

Keikæ: Si peliannen i vâd na dail lîn. Si boe ú-dhannathach. [It is already laid before your feet. You cannot falter now.]

No, I don't speak elvish, but I've memorised every line of the film.

Aragorn: Arwen...

He finally twigged.

Aragorn: Keikæ?!

I got away, sharpish, knowing I'd have to face him in the morning.

-x-x-x-x-x-

It was the second day of the journey to Helm's Deep, and I was attempting to keep out of Aragorn's way, for a very good reason. I failed. Curiosity got the better of me, and so, I found myself dawdling along behind Éowyn and Aragorn. It didn't matter – he wouldn't say anything in front of Éowyn.

Éowyn: Where is she? The woman who gave you that jewel.

Aragorn turned to face me. I knew exactly what was going through his mind.

Keikæ: It was a gift. Keep it.

I whispered the last part.

Éowyn: My lord?

Thank god she hadn't heard. I got there before Aragorn.

Keikæ: She is sailing to the Undying Lands, with all that is left of her kin.

I suddenly realised something. This was the part where the column got attacked.

"Shit!" I muttered. Unfortunately, both Éowyn and Aragorn heard me.

Aragorn: Keikæ... What's wrong?

I ran up to the front, to where the king was.

Keikæ: My lord.

::To hell with that.::

I didn't bother to wait for an answer.

Keikæ: Ok. You probably don't believe me now, but please, just listen.

He paused. I took this as a sign to continue.

Keikæ: The wolves of Isengaurd are on their way.

Théoden: I haven't got time for this-

Keikæ: No, please, just listen. Saruman has sent-

Théoden: Please excuse me, but I must speak to the scout.

::God – you must think I have shit for brains or summin'!::

Before I could argue any further, I recognised Legolas' voice shout:

Legolas: A scout!

Théoden: What is it? What do you see?

Aragorn sprinted back towards us.

Aragorn: Wargs! We are under attack!

At this shout, the villagers begin to cry and panic.

::Pathetic. Well – can't say I didn't warn you, Théoden King.::

Keikæ: Do you believe me now?

Finding no answer, he ignored me, swinging round to face Aragorn.

Aragorn: Get them out of here!

Théoden: All riders to the head of the column! Keikæ, is it? Can you fight?

Keikæ: You mean will I fight, and the answers yes.

At that, a soldier pushed the reins of a horse into my hand. I mounted, watching Gimli attempt to do the same.

Gimli: Come on, get me up here, I'm a rider! Argh!

Théoden: To Éowyn You must lead the people to Helm's Deep. And make haste!

Éowyn: I can fight!

Théoden: No! You must do this... for me.

Éowyn held Théoden's gaze for a moment and then turned to attend to the villagers.

As I went to join the rest of the riders, I paused by Eowyn, whispering to her quietly.

Keikae: Time after next. Trust me on this one. Juts please don't do anything stupid.

Théoden yelled to the soldiers: "Follow me! Yah!"

I again watch Gimli struggle with Arod.

Gimli: Forward. I mean, charge forward! March forward! That's it! Go on!

Aragorn turned on Hasufel to meet Eowyn's eyes. They held each other's gaze for a moment before Aragorn turned to join Théoden on his rather unsubtle way of attacking the orcs. Éowyn departed with the villagers in the opposite direction.

As we rose over a mound, I finally saw what we'd be fighting. Ok, on the Big Screen is pretty good, but in real life, trust me, it's frightening. Legolas took aim at the distant target and fell a warg rider. He drew another arrow and killed another. He quickly ran and mounted Arod with a smooth leap and joins in the fray with Gimli behind him on horseback.

::Mon, I wish I could do that – Laila's been practising that move for ages.::

I found myself wishing she was here with me now.

Warg-riders: Argh!!

Théoden: CHARGE!!

It was exactly like the film. Just much scarier and 20 times more realistic.

::Hmm... I wonder why?...::

Soldiers and orcs fighting all around me, hacking, tearing at each others throats. Literally. I would've liked to see Gimli's little act of practically being crushed under an orc and two wargs, but at the time, you can't exactly choose where you are or aren't.

I slashed left and right, ploughing my way through the stinking creatures along with several others, Aragorn one of them.

::Hang on – Aragorn!::

At that moment, Aragorn was knocked off Hasufel and attacked by another orc called Sharku. (A/N: Don't ask.) By now he was on the back of a warg beating up Sharku. He was then thrown of, and dragged along by the warg. I couldn't get there fast enough. Sharku was thrown off, but in doing so, he ripped the Evenstar pendant from Aragorn's neck as he fell. I could see Aragorn's wrist tangled with the saddle straps. I hate it when I'm watching something, but can't do anything about it. He was getting closer to the edge of the cliff. I had to do something.

I urged the horse I was riding on, and tried to slash the straps on the beast. On the third attempt, I cut him free. Too late. The warg ran straight off the cliff and they both disappeared over the edge. I jumped forward off my horse, who skidded to a halt, and grabbed his hand. Unfortunately, he was alot heavier than I expected, so I found myself being pulled over the edge too. At the last minute, I grabbed a branch sticking out of the cliff, near the top. I looked down at the rapids below us. Something I very much regretted.

Keikæ: Ah. Ok, just, hang in there for a moment. Literally.

::Oh yeah, a very useful thing to say.::

Legolas: Aragorn!

Gimli: Aragorn?

::Finally!::

Keikæ: Yo! Legolas! Yo! Down 'ere.

They came near to the cliff and heard Sharku wheezing and laughing.

Gimli: Tell me what happened and I will ease your passing.

Keikæ: Oi! Don't bother with him – he'll die – we're in need of a little help here!

Sharku: He's cough dead. Laughs evilly Took a little tumble off the cliff.

::Why are they ignoring me?::

I was beginning to lose grip of Aragorn's hand.

Legolas looked towards the edge of the cliff, not seeing me, of course.

Legolas: You lie!

::I swear I've heard him say that somewhere before...::

Sharku chortled and died. Legolas looks down at Sharku's fist and finds the Evenstar pendant.

Keikæ: OI!! LOOK! LEGOLAS! WHELP! – GET YOUR ELVEN BUTT OVER HERE AND LEND A HAND!!!

He grabbed it, ran to the edge of the cliff and peered over the side to see the great drop, rushing waters below, and me, dangling there, my arms aching like hell from holding both me and Aragorn there, who was unsuccessfully trying to get a foothold. Gimli came to stand beside him.

Legolas: Aragorn! Over his shoulder. Rope!

His hand was slipping. A thought came to me: Aragorn survived when he came off the cliff, but I had changed that. If he dropped he'd probably die, and I would feel really guilty because it was my entire fault.

Keikæ: Don't let go! Don't you dare let go!

Too late. I felt Aragorn's hand slip from mine, and I managed a final lunge to grab his hand, but with no luck. The result: he fell into the water and my (well, more like Bex') hat fell in after him. The hat was the least of my worries. That bendy twig I'd been calling a branch snapped, and I went to join Aragorn and Bex' beloved hat and was probably going to Davie Jones' Locker. That was when Legolas came with the rope.

::Bit late now.::

Thank God I was wrong. He threw one end of the rope, and either by luck or miracle, I caught it. Trust me, being slam against the wall of a cliff and being dragged to the top is NOT fun. Don't try it, just trust me.

I scrambled over the top with some help from the elf.

Théoden: To his men Get the wounded on horses. The wolves of Isengard will return. Leave the dead.

Legolas turned to Théoden, dropping me, an expression of perplexed anger on his face.

::Aye, well thank you very much. I ONLY tried to save ya mates life.::

Théoden put a hand on Legolas' shoulder.

Théoden: Come.

I left Legolas and Gimli to stare down at the river.

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A/N:

Too short? That's the longest chapter I've written yet! 10 Pages!! Flippin hell Please review and I'll update. Deal?

Kess ;P