Luna: No new zodiac cat because no one can ever replace our Kyou!!! Oh yeah, and I've already run by the other Gundam Wing characters zodiacs, right? If not, Trowa is the dog, Quatre the bunny, Wufei the dragon, Heero the ox, Relena the pig snicker, and Bob is the tiger.

And to the bitchmonkey person: tch, my fic so I can do what I want. You don't like it; well that's your opinion. I have a few people that do and I won't stop writing this fic because you have some stupid problems with it.

Chapter Seventeen: Just a little thing called the Sohma syndrome

Duo lay in his bed silently. Bob hadn't moved even an inch which was okay to Duo because he didn't want to have to listen to all the annoying 'Bob's. Tip toeing out of bed, Duo crossed the room and opened the sliding door once more. The hallways were still lit even though it was getting to be either pretty late at night or really early in the morning. Since he didn't eat anything at the banquet and he hadn't succeeded in his hunt for cheese, Duo proceeded back to the kitchen in search of a new snack. Hatsuharu was sitting at the table inside the kitchen but instead of running for his life, Duo sat down across from him in hopes to make peace.

"Hey there! Mind if I just call you, Haru?" Duo asked in an all-too-cheerful voice.

"Um… okay…" Hatsuharu said slowly with a blank look in his eyes.

Duo stared at the table with a fake happy expression. Hatsuharu didn't seem to notice Duo's horrible acting skills or the fact that he was sweating bullets. Ritsu popped into the room.

"OH NO! I'M SORRY FOR INTERRUPTING YOUR TIME! I WAS JUST HUNGRY AND GOMEN NASAI!!!!" Ritsu sobbed.

"Ritsu… shut up…" Duo groaned. To his surprise, Ritsu went quiet immediately.

"It's late…" Haru said randomly. At first Duo thought that meant Hatsuharu wanted to go to bed but Haru didn't make any movement to stand.

"What should we three guys (at least I think Ritsu is a guy) talk about?" Duo asked.

"How about a man-to-man talk about women?" Ritsu suggested, making Duo's eyes widened in surprise. Was it just him or was Ritsu trying to be assertive? "GOMEN NASAI!!! I'VE MADE YOU UNCOMFORTABLE!!!"

"That's a good idea, Ritsu." Duo grinned… after all he didn't want to continue listening to Ritsu's whining.

Each of them decided to just wander off in thought and aimlessly describe the person they admired or their dream girl (or guy depending on their taste).

"They'd say that they lived just for me…" Ritsu sighed.

"Someone who was cold on the outside but had a very warm heart." Haru mumbled.

"A girl unlike any other who can actually kick my ass." Duo laughed.

"-And we'll eat jelly buns…"

"-When she smiles it would make those around her smile…"

"-With her blue bangs hanging over her eyes…"

"What?" Haru snapped out of it and jerked his head over to Duo.

"Huh?" Duo blinked while Ritsu continued rambling on in the background.

"Whom were you talking about?" Haru asked.

"Whom were you talking about?" Duo perked an eyebrow.

"Yume Midori…" Haru went back to his blank stare.

"Same here…" Duo said slowly.

Immediately there was just a little tension in the air between the rat and the ox. But before either of them could start an argument Ritsu had stopped rambling. "GOMEN NASAI!!! I'M THE ONE RESPONSIBLE FOR STARTING THIS ARGUMENT, WHICH HASN'T EVEN STARTED YET!!! I APOLOGIZE TO YOU BOTH!!! PLEASE DON'T FIGHT!!! I'M SOOOO SORRY!!!"

Rin had entered the room during Ritsu's outburst (which was currently being ignored). She went to the freezer to get a hay cycle. You've never heard of a hay cycle? WELL! It's like a pop cycle but only with hay. Why hay you ask? Duh, Rin's the horse…

Anyway, Rin got what she wanted and snickered when she walked past the table on her way out. "Fools!" She spat snidely and then tripped on the doorway. Duo would have burst out laughing but for one, Haru was giving him an evil look, and two, Rin had caught herself before she fell. Ritsu was still sobbing and apologizing so Duo left the kitchen and saw Shigure exiting Akito's room for who knows what. Hatori burst out of the room afterwards and Duo stopped dead in his tracks at what he saw.

"I'M A WOMAN I TELL YOU!!! A WOMAN!!!" Hatori yelled and ran past Duo wearing a hula skirt.

Ayame came around the corner and stopped Hatori. "Listen to me carefully, Ha'ri." Aya said calmly. "Take deep breaths and calm down. You are not a woman, you are a man so just calm down."

Duo was stunned and couldn't move… well, could you move if Hatori ran past wearing a hula skirt and Ayame was the voice of reason? Oh my God!!! The world is ending!!!

Ayame led Hatori away and Shigure merely scratched his head. "I have a feeling that Akito had something to do with that…" Shigure turned right back around and opened Akito's door. "Akito, did you do something to Hatori?"

Akito was still stroking his teddy bear and when he turned around he was wearing a girl's school uniform. Akito blinked twice at Shigure's question before blurting out, "It was the bird's fault!!!" Akito jerked a spazzing finger at the little white bird that was perched on a flowerpot. "The bird hypnotized me into hypnotizing Hatori!!! IT'S YOUR ENTIRE FAULT!!! IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!!!"

"Forget I asked." Shigure sighed and shut the door.

"You people scare me…" Duo managed to say while he remained stiff as a board.

"Don't we?" Shigure laughed lightly as he walked past the shocked Duo and went back to his own room.

Still trying to get rid of his stiffness, Duo decided to explore since the kitchen was giving off a don't-you-dare-enter aura.

Duo strode past an open sliding door leading outside casually when he saw Heero sitting outside, stargazing. Screeching to a halt, Duo stopped and his behind the door, spying on Heero. The quiet and mysterious teen didn't do much except occasionally shift his position to keep his limbs from falling asleep. How could anyone sit outside on a cold January night in shorts anyway?! Someone tapped Duo on the shoulder and Duo screamed like a girl. Freaking out, the braided boy ran away into the nearby forest of the Sohma house. Just kidding he ran back to his bedroom like a coward. Heero had turned around aiming his gun at where Duo had been then looked up slightly to see a surprised Trowa standing there with his hand hovering where he had tapped Duo on the shoulder. They both shrugged and Heero placed his gun back in spandex space in his shorts. How the hell does he do that? It's a mystery and always will be…

TO BE CONTINUED

I apologize if my writing has gone to Hell but I hope you guys don't mind too much. I also changed the genre just a bit to Humor/Drama because I find it more fitting. I think that's about it ja!