Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter...says Phorpus, moo moo says the cow, cluck cluck says the chicken...
A HUNDRED?!?
Harry and Hermione were currently in the common room, pouring over books and maps, trying to find out where Ron was.
"I say we go and kill everybody!", said Harry. "Why? and Where?...and WHO?"
"I don't care, lets go back to the Hogwarts ruins! I'm in a killing mood!"
"Then join the confederate army! But right now, we have to find...do you hear that?"
Harry put his ear to the window and said, "I think Ronny is back!"
-----------------On The Grounds-------------------
Ron landed safely on the grass and waved goodbye to the ringwraith as it flew into the sky.
"BYE! Don't forget to write! And I hope you beat Armstrong's ass in the race!"
Harry tackled Ron and started punching the crap out of him.
"FLIPPENDO! and what are you doing, Harry?!"
Harry reeled in pain as he realized his head was bleeding and said, "Sorry...I'm in a killing mood...I'm going to fall asleep...now..."
Harry fell unconscious and started mumbling, "Kill...kill...them both...take the precioussssss..."
Hermione hugged Ron tightly and said, "Oh, I though we lost you!"
Ron was blushing madly and said, "Er...uh...er...I have red hair!"
Hermione let go and said, "Stop joking around, c'mon, lets get some dinner into you."
Harry never got up, but a couple sea turtles started dragging him into the Yolk Forest...
-----------------------In the Great Hall------------------
"Ron! I thought you'd died!", said Ginny as she hugged her brother.
"Yeah, yeah...had to fight off all these evil...things..."
"Oh, yeah? what evil things?", said Hermione.
"Er...Otters? The radioactive kind?"
Dumbledore got up and all went silent as he said, "Well, now that one of my misplaced students are found, I'd like to report ANOTHER missing student. Who is much more important and rich, Mr. Harry Potter."
The whole hall went quiet, even Draco...more probably because of the horse tranquilizers, except for Ginny.
"I have brought many people in this news. I would also like to say that, it seems that sexual intercourse is STILL running rampant!"
"Ow! Stop biting my pubes!...", squealed Seamus in the silence.
The part of the Gryffindor table that was in front of him bumped up and a female whispered a small, "Ow!"
Seamus wiped the lipstick off of his face and said, "Damn termites."
Silence.
"So...", continued Dumbledore "I have decided to administer some tough love...EW! No not that kind!"
A few people boo'd this.
"You must now have'relations' with at least 100 different people, in order to stop. Also, when you complete the 100, I will give you two hundred house points and ten galleons."
Hermione was already trying to make a list of the hundred she would have sex with, while Ron was thinking, "I hope Harry's okay."
Little did he know that Harry was watching the hall with a gagged mouth...and a familiar hand reaching down his pants...
A/N: Review, not my best work. I PROMISE to post new stuff by tomorrow.
A HUNDRED?!?
Harry and Hermione were currently in the common room, pouring over books and maps, trying to find out where Ron was.
"I say we go and kill everybody!", said Harry. "Why? and Where?...and WHO?"
"I don't care, lets go back to the Hogwarts ruins! I'm in a killing mood!"
"Then join the confederate army! But right now, we have to find...do you hear that?"
Harry put his ear to the window and said, "I think Ronny is back!"
-----------------On The Grounds-------------------
Ron landed safely on the grass and waved goodbye to the ringwraith as it flew into the sky.
"BYE! Don't forget to write! And I hope you beat Armstrong's ass in the race!"
Harry tackled Ron and started punching the crap out of him.
"FLIPPENDO! and what are you doing, Harry?!"
Harry reeled in pain as he realized his head was bleeding and said, "Sorry...I'm in a killing mood...I'm going to fall asleep...now..."
Harry fell unconscious and started mumbling, "Kill...kill...them both...take the precioussssss..."
Hermione hugged Ron tightly and said, "Oh, I though we lost you!"
Ron was blushing madly and said, "Er...uh...er...I have red hair!"
Hermione let go and said, "Stop joking around, c'mon, lets get some dinner into you."
Harry never got up, but a couple sea turtles started dragging him into the Yolk Forest...
-----------------------In the Great Hall------------------
"Ron! I thought you'd died!", said Ginny as she hugged her brother.
"Yeah, yeah...had to fight off all these evil...things..."
"Oh, yeah? what evil things?", said Hermione.
"Er...Otters? The radioactive kind?"
Dumbledore got up and all went silent as he said, "Well, now that one of my misplaced students are found, I'd like to report ANOTHER missing student. Who is much more important and rich, Mr. Harry Potter."
The whole hall went quiet, even Draco...more probably because of the horse tranquilizers, except for Ginny.
"I have brought many people in this news. I would also like to say that, it seems that sexual intercourse is STILL running rampant!"
"Ow! Stop biting my pubes!...", squealed Seamus in the silence.
The part of the Gryffindor table that was in front of him bumped up and a female whispered a small, "Ow!"
Seamus wiped the lipstick off of his face and said, "Damn termites."
Silence.
"So...", continued Dumbledore "I have decided to administer some tough love...EW! No not that kind!"
A few people boo'd this.
"You must now have'relations' with at least 100 different people, in order to stop. Also, when you complete the 100, I will give you two hundred house points and ten galleons."
Hermione was already trying to make a list of the hundred she would have sex with, while Ron was thinking, "I hope Harry's okay."
Little did he know that Harry was watching the hall with a gagged mouth...and a familiar hand reaching down his pants...
A/N: Review, not my best work. I PROMISE to post new stuff by tomorrow.