Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titans, or I don't own the two peoms in the story. The first one was found at ForwardGarden again the other from a different website (Sorry I didn't write it down) hope the authors don't mind me using the poems.

I'm going on holiday from the 11th to the 18th so I won't be posting any chapters during then and probally won't update until the 20th or something.

enjoy

CHAPTER FOUR

Round 2

Raven had spent the rest of the day sitting in her room mediating. It's not like anyone tried to stop me, they have left me in peace all day, for once.

I can't believe I'm obsessing so much, Raven sighed and ran her fingers through her short and choppy hair. They are so in love, I should be happy for them. Not sitting in my room in the dark pitying myself...I can't believe I can be this shallow, just caring about myself. I mean its obvious Robin has no feelings for me. I should just discard these feels, live numb and empty again. So I can at least make sure I don't torture myself day after day like I do now. Grr!!! Raven climbed off her bed and started pacing. I feel emotions like a human now, I am human now. I am nothing but a simple mortal. I can't control myself as I could before when I was half and half. No, that's not true. When I still had a part demon soul I had to shut out others so I wouldn't end up hurting them...or killing them. Now that part of my soul is gone I feel a hollowness inside of me that needs to be filled with something. It sucks to be human.

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Raven left the T-tower around 5 o'clock, when her stomach started hurting so much she couldn't concentrate. No one had asked her where she was going. They all ignored her when she walked out the front door while they were watching TV.

Raven walked through the streets at first looking for some place she could get something to eat. After a little while she ended eating at some fast food place. The food was so greasy even after washing her hands she still felt like they were covered in lard.

Raven then started wandering the streets looking in the windows of some of the shops. I haven't gotten anything for the rest of the titans for Christmas yet... She thought, Maybe I'll ask Sarah to go shopping with me tomorrow. She started drifting in and out of shops until she was so bored she couldn't take it anymore. She looked at the clock inside of a small prank shop (she was looking for a present for Beast Boy) it read: 6:30. Still half an hour until round two of the poetry contest, oh well I might as well hang out there for a while not like I have anywhere to go right now.

Raven walked through the park again. This time the snow was around ankle deep on the pathways from the resent snowfall. Raven pulled her feet so they left long slide marks. And sometimes picking up a handful of snow then throwing it at a near-by tree. Raven slowly made her way through the park. She ran across the street and walked inside the heated small café.

Raven slide into a bar stool at the dry bar at the back of the café. She ordered a hot chocolate mostly just to hold and try to warm up her fingers. A male sat down beside her, he bowed his head and ordered a hot chocolate for himself also. His black shag-styled hair covered his eyes, "Hey," Michael said quietly in his low soothing voice. "Hey," Raven replied back, her heart skipped a beat. Her arms tensed a bit as his elbow lightly brushed past hers when he reached into his pocket to pay for the hot chocolate. He took a sip, then set it down and sighed. His face was blank, but his bright blue eyes seemed to hold certain sadness. Raven turned towards him, Michael raised his head. They stared into each other eyes, this time Raven felt a rush of sadness and depression, almost a hint of suicidal emotions. "Is there something wrong?" She asked still looking into his eyes. Michael exhaled and turned back facing forward. Raven turned back forward again. "She died," he said quietly, Raven took a sip of hot chocolate and turned her head towards Michael, "Who died?"

"My girlfriend, Lindsay,"

"How?" asked Raven quickly and bluntly, "If you don't mind talking about it," she added quickly afterwards.

Michael sighed and took another sip of hot chocolate, "I'm still in shock...we were talking just before hand right in here at the back table. Then she went home, while driving her car slipped on some ice and rolled over in a ditch. The car exploded before people could get her out," he rubbed his forehead. Raven gasped. No wonder I could sense suicide type emotions, his girlfriend died! He is in a depressing slump, I fear he might really comment suicide, I guess I could touch the tips of his mind to help ease the pain. Raven closed her eyes; she forced her conscious to touch the tips of his mind. Her mind slowly started to connect to his; suddenly she felt a sharp stab of pain that left her mind feeling lethargic and light-headed. Raven quickly retreated her mind from his conscious. He set defenses inside his mind...Raven rubbed her temples, ow.

The bell on the door jingled, Raven looked over her shoulder. It was Sarah, Sarah noticed her and walked over to the back and sat down beside Raven. "Hey Rae," Sarah said a little too perky. Michael raised an eyebrow and stood up and walked over to the men's washroom. "I wasn't interrupting anything was I?" she said in a playful voice. Raven raised an eyebrow, Sarah burst out laughing. A few people turned and looked over at them. Raven smelt a tinge of alcohol on her breath, "Sarah, have you been drinking?" she asked in a serious tone, Sarah tried to keep a straight face, "No,"

Raven called over the teenage girl that was working the dry-bar and ordered a coffee for Sarah. Sarah drank a couple of gulps of coffee, when her face turned slightly green and she made a break for the washroom. Just then Michael came out, he watched Sarah run into the woman's washroom and decided to sit at the back table with a friend instead of joining Raven at the dry-bar. Raven sighed and slumped her shoulders. She turned her head slightly to catch a glimpse of Michael, It's hopeless...he had a girlfriend that died the last thing he wants is to pick up some loser like me. Raven sighed again.

Sarah walked out of the bathroom with her hand on her head, "Ugh," she groaned as she sat down beside, "I guess I had one too many eggnogs," No kidding, Raven thought. Sarah scratched her cheek and blushed slightly, "Sorry about scarring him off..."

"I didn't have a chance anyways; his girlfriend died last night,"

"In that car crash?" Raven nodded, Sarah closed her eyes and shook her head slightly, "I read about it in the paper, what a horrible way to die..."

"Same I read in the paper," Raven turned her head and glanced again at Michael, "he seems to be taking it good though," on the outside, Raven added in her mind. Sarah nodded absentminded and took a sip of her coffee.

The two of them sat there in silence keeping their thoughts to themselves. Slowly the minutes ticked by, Raven raised her head from her empty mug and looked at the clock, it read five to seven. Just then Raven noticed that a lot of people had started gathering inside the café. Raven sighed, she wasn't nervous just kind of anxious. She pulled out a small crumpled piece of paper and started to re-read the piece of the paper.

The owner stepped up onto stage and tapped the microphone, "Welcome to round two of the poetry contest, yeah... four contestations left: Michael, Raven, Sean and Tiffany. Okay first up is Michael and his poem Darkened Skies," the owner walked off the stage to the dry-bar and took a sip of water then turned toward the stage where Michael was standing in front of the microphone, "I was going to read Darkened Skies, but I wrote something this morning that I'd like to read instead," he pulled out a piece of lined paper and cleared his throat, "Its called: Burn then Fade,

"It was what made the soft white rose petals unfold with the dreamlike laughter,
Luminous smile and her golden hair gleaming like the sunrise,
White silk and satin dancing in the wind
The sun sets and those memories and fantasies fade.
The sweet melodic music dies away as it trills into the distance.
A crystal tear rolls down my face.
The soft shimmering drops of sunlight become hard hateful drops of cold wet rain,
And that's all you can hear now,
The rhythm of the glassy droplets on the dark cold ground, dampen
My eyes weary, half closed they stare blankly
The glow that once lit my blue eyes died and left them cold and gray.
I raise my head and look into the sheets of rain,
The stormy sky clouds the horizon.
The white roses become limp as I throw the last of the beautiful flowers at the foot of her weathered stone cross.
I shove my clammy hands into the warm wool pockets of my soaked trench coat.
I lower my head, raindrops dripping from my tattered brim.
Slowly I walk away...
The small pools splash at my feet as the memories burn then fade," Michael bowed his head in thought, he slowly walked off the stage. The poem was obviously about his ex-girlfriend.

The crowd was in silence as if the whole place was in mourning to his girlfriend. Raven raised her hands and slowly began to clap; at first she was alone then slowly one by one the café broke into applause. Michael smiled as if it pained him, he caught Raven's eye. Though no words were spoken, but Raven got the message: Thank you.

"Very...interesting," the owner said in a mono-tone obviously bored, "Next up: Raven," he walked off the stage as Raven passed him. Raven stared out at the crowd she noticed Michael walk out the side door that lead to the alleyway besides the café. Part of her said to join him and she desperately wanted too. Raven spoke slowly and calmly as she could into the microphone, "This is my poem: Self-Abuse.

"You take it, and you take it
And you learn,
You learn all too well,
So that later, when there's nobody to dish it out,
You can punch yourself in the gut
And take it some more.

The best part is,
With training and practice,
You learn your own soft spots and weaknesses,
So that you become your own best tormentor.

Double up over the pain and swallow.
It'll still be there tomorrow,
Waiting for you," Raven lifted her eyes from the page, there was clapping. Not as big of a affect of Michael's poem but she didn't really care right now. She walked off the stage and went out the side door like Michael did.

He was sitting with his side to the door and Raven. "Are you all right?" she asked sitting down next to him despite the snow. Raven felt a wave of depression flood over her. Michael looked up, tears streaking down his face. "You're the only one..." he said softly, "Only one of what?" Raven asked concern in her voice. "My friends all act like nothing happened with their fake cheeriness, my parents tell me to shape up...they never liked Lindsay. You're the only one who cares about me." Raven tilted her head slightly to the side and tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear. I don't know what to say, I don't really know him. I can't tell him to cheer up, how can he? Raven asked herself, he lost someone close to him...

Then Michael did something both of them weren't expecting, he leaned in and gave her a passionate kiss on the lips. Raven didn't try and stop it even though she knew he didn't really like her, he was just trying to fill the hole Lindsay left. They pulled apart gasping for breath, Michael leaned in again, but Raven pushed him back. "No," she said sternly, then in a softer tone, "Your only trying to replace Lindsay..." Raven looked down, "You don't even know me," Michael stood up, "Your right," he said softly. He started walking out of the allyway, "Wait Michael!" called Raven as he disappeared around the corner. She stood up and followed Michael. "Huh?" asked Raven to herself. Michael's was gone, his footprints had just disappeared too.

-SNOWBALLHEAT-