Choices
Summary: Missing Scene (or more extended scene) from Affinity
Pairings: Sam/Jack
Rating: G
Spoilers: Affinity…
Disclaimer: They ain't mine…but I'm borrowing them for today
A/N: Hey guys! I'm accumulating fan fics that will be posted once…ok well by the time you've read this I will be allowed online again! Read and enjoy!!
Sam stared blankly at her computer screen. She had been about to write something important – she had distinct memories of thinking "I better write that down before I forget it". So much for that.
She sighed and opened up another document she'd been working on. Something about naquadah decay rates being abnormal…
She sighed and leaned her head in her hand. Who was she kidding? She wasn't up for doing any work. She hit the 'P' key…then the 'J' key.
P
J
Pete
Jack
She sighed again and continued pressing random keys, even though she knew no one was watching. Hell it was so late there was probably no one left on base.
She heard footsteps, which surprised her, and looked up. General Jack O'Neill stood in her doorway, sleeves rolled up to his elbows, looking kind of tired. But he still looked good.
No, stop thinking that, Sam thought.
"Carter…" he said after a moment.
"Sir!" she said, waking up out of her thoughtful trance and stopped leaning on her hand.
"I never thought I'd hear myself utter these words…" he said carefully.
What words? She thought. Maybe he knew about Pete. This was about Pete, why else would he be here? But how…? She hadn't told anyone.
"I need that report," he said slowly.
Oh.
Report?
What report?
Oh that report…
"Right, umm…I…I just need to…ah…finish typing up my notes," she sifted through the files on her desk, pretending she had some form of notes.
He moved into the lab.
"Uh, you know, I'll have it for you first thing tomorrow," she said, not wanting to annoy him.
"It is tomorrow," Jack said, in his Jack way.
Of course its tomorrow, she thought looking at her watch. What time was it? She was staring at it, but she couldn't seem to register the time.
"Oh," she said simply.
"I'm joking," he said.
Huh? She thought. Now I'm confused…
"I don't need your report," he said, leaning against her desk.
So…
"Well then why…?" she started.
"Cos something's going on with you!" he butted in.
Oh, he noticed. How nice of him¸ she though, half sarcastic…but not completely.
She looked away, she couldn't tell him.
Or could she?
Maybe she should just tell him…
"You haven't tried to confused me with any scientific babble for a couple of days and that's a red flag for me," he said.
She flinched and looked back at her computer for help. Not that it was much help…it was a computer. She pulled the ring out of her pocket and held it out towards Jack.
"Pete gave me this," she said.
Jack stared at her for a moment, before looking down at what he knew was there. He looked back at her, then back at the ring, reaching out for it and taking it from her. He opened it, already knowing what was inside. He looked at her quickly and then back at the ring.
"People normally wear these on their fingers," he stated, looking at her again.
She avoided his gaze for a moment. "I haven't said yes…"
"And yet…you haven't said no," he snapped the box shut and she blinked.
Emotions were overwhelming her.
What kind of stupid impulse had made her tell him this…alone? After midnight? With no one around to interrupt them…?
Or maybe that's why she'd chosen this moment.
Well while she was here might as well open up…
"I told him I needed to think about it," she told him.
Jack didn't seem to know what to say.
"And?" he put the box back down on the table in front of him, the noise seeming to echo throughout the silent SGC.
He left his fingers on it for a moment, Sam watched until he pulled his hand away.
"That was too weeks ago," she said, looking at him again.
"Ah," Jack said, seeming to find great interest in the table top.
"You know all these years I've been concentrating on work I just assumed one day I'd…"
"Have a life," he stated.
She looked at him. Was that coming from his own personal experience? Or was he just mocking her…either way he was right.
"Yeah," she replied.
He nodded slightly and looked down.
"And now it comes down to it, I don't know," she said.
Again he looked away, looking slightly uncomfortable.
"I mean every time we go through the gate we risk not coming back! Is it fair to put somebody else through that?" she said, more to herself than him.
"Pete is a cop…I think he could handle it," Jack replied.
True.
Next problem.
"So…what about kids?" she asked him.
"What about them?" he replied.
"Do I just take maternity leave and then come back? I mean what…do I drop the baby off at day care on my way some unexplored planet on the edge of the crab nebula?" she asked, letting everything out.
"Carter…there are people on this base who have families," he replied.
If he was trying to make her feel better, it was working. There was just one more problem…
She looked away and then down at the table. Should she even say it? If she had to talk to anyone about it…it was him. Which was kind of ironic considering he was the problem. She looked at him and breathed in deeply, looking away again.
"What about you?" she asked, her eyes meeting his.
He moved his head slightly, no expression crossing his face. The exact expression she had expected…Jack hiding his emotions. She could see he didn't know what to say.
"If things had been different…" she stopped, maybe it had been stupid of her to bring this up at all.
She cringed slightly and looked down again. She shouldn't have said anything.
You idiot, she thought. You stupid idiot why did you have to go and say that?
"I wouldn't be here," Jack stated, his voice cutting through her thoughts.
She looked up at him. They stared at each other for what seemed like ages, before Jack's eyes flicked to the table top.
Sam looked away. What did he mean? He wouldn't be here right now talking to her about Pete? He wouldn't be head of the SGC? He wouldn't be alive just like in all those alternate realities? There were so many things that sentence meant. Yet someone it worked perfectly.
"I will always be here for you, no matter what," he said, breaking the silence.
She looked at him, startled. She'd heard those words come from 'his' mouth before. Except this time it was real. It was actually him.
"I know," she replied, then she sighed. "I dunno what to do."
"What if it had been me?" Jack said suddenly.
Sam looked up at him. "What?"
"You know what I said," Jack replied, not seeming to want to say it again.
"Then we wouldn't be here would we?" Sam replied, looking at the small box sitting between them. "We wouldn't be having this conversation."
"No, we wouldn't," Jack replied.
Another long silence. Sam could feel Jack's eyes on her, but she avoided looking at him. She stared back at her computer screen.
P
J
Why did things have to be so complicated?
"Pete's a good guy," Jack's voice rung throughout the lab.
"Yeah," Sam replied. "Yeah he is."
"If I had to chose someone to take care of you, it would be someone like him," Jack replied.
She looked up at him, meeting his eyes. "That means a lot to me, thank you."
"Anytime," Jack smiled slightly. "It won't change anything."
What was that supposed to mean?
"Yes it will," Sam replied.
His smile disappeared. "Carter…as long as your happy, I'm happy. You'll be happy with him."
She didn't reply. Sure she was happy with Pete, but she didn't share with him what she did with Jack. They hadn't been through death, torture, battles…
She looked at Jack's face, trying to read his thoughts. She'd expected him to be jealous, protective even. But he was taking it calmly. Maybe it really was the best thing. It was the whole reason she'd gone out with Pete in the first place, to push aside her feeling for Jack. And here she was, discussing her feelings with Jack.
"Carter, get some sleep," Jack said. "You look tired, and I'm 99% sure that's not work sitting on your computer screen…"
"Yes, sir," she replied automatically.
"You'll make the right decision," he said. "I trust you."
Sam nodded as he walked out.
"Oh, and Carter?" he'd stopped at the door. "I do actually need that mission report before the end of the week…"
"Yes, sir," she smiled.
"Good luck," he said, smiling…she sense a kind of sadness coming from him.
Then he was gone.
She looked at where he'd left the ring sitting on her desk.
"What if it had been me?"
Jack's words echoed throughout her mind.
"If it had been you the answer would have been yes," she whispered to herself, shutting her laptop lid and grabbing the ring, shoving it back in her pocket.
A/N: so what you think? I thought the scene wasn't quite long enough in the episode…it needed to be extended ;)! Please review!!