Sorry about the grammar mistakes in ch 2. Inaddition to HP and the Simpsons, I don't own Mary Poppins or Fox. Thanks to those who reviewed!
CHAPTER 3: A WHOLE LOT-DIDLY OF TIME
Bart Simpson, unlike his sister, did not stay up late that night reading Hogwarts, A History, nor did peruse the pages of various spell books. Instead, he was up late working on an interesting (to say the very least) parcel that would be delivered by his new owl, Fallout Boy.
As he tied the package to the eagle owl's leg, he imagined the look of its recipient's face when he opened it.
He opened the window of his room in the Leaky Cauldron, and sent Fallout Boy on his journey across the sea to Springfield.
Most of the families with children attending Hogwarts got up at the crack of dawn to make the trek to King's Cross, the Simpsons were not among them.
After being woken up several times by Lisa and Bart, Homer rolled out of bed and muttered something like, "...false Saturday morning..." before jumping off the floor and yelling, "Oh my God, we don't make it on time, we're stuck with kids until next year!" after Lisa had mentioned that the train leaves in four minutes.
Throwing his family into the car, Homer, for a brief moment, thought what might happen, if he didn't get them to King's Cross on time:
He was sitting with an ice-cold Duff on the couch, watching When Buildings Collapse on Fox when Bart and Lisa suddenly stepped between him and the TV.
"Hello Father." they said monotonously to him.
"Hey," he said, "aren't you supposed to be at school?"
"We're not going to school. You made us miss the train, and now you're stuck with us all year! Ha ha ha ha ha...
"Welc-didily-elcome to my world!" said Ned, dodging flying furniture, "I guess we'll be spending a whole lot-didily of time together now..."
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" screamed Homer as his foot impacted the gas pedal with such force that his right shoe split apart.
After avoiding several near-death collisions with other cars ("Drive on the right side of the road, jerks!" yelled Homer, who apparently had not grasped the fact that you drove on the left side of the road in Europe.), they crashed through the front doors of the train station and began driving inside.
"Homer," said Marge, with Maggie clutching her neck in terror as they swerved around people (with the exception of Hans Moleman whom was not spared by Homer's erratic driving), "don't you think we should get out of the car..."
"And spend a lifetime with Flanders, not on my watch... I'll 'lot- didily time' you!"
"What?" asked everyone else as they continued evading, and running over, people.
"Now," said Homer, "we just need to find platform nine and three quarters, and the kids are gone for a whole year!"
"Homer!" nagged Marge.
They passed platform nine, and they passed platform ten.
"Where the heck is it?" asked Homer in frustration, no doubt fearing what would come to pass if he failed. "Maybe it's somewhere between nine and ten and we missed it?"
He U-turned the car, driving through a few more bystanders, and sped into the archway between platforms.
"Dad," screamed Lisa, "you're going to hit that-"
But before she could say, "wall!" the car had passed through the barrier into platform nine and three quarters. Before them stood a scarlet steam engine with Hogwarts Express written on it.
"It's beautiful!" said Lisa.
"It's awesome!" said Bart.
"It's amazing!" said Marge.
"Wow," said Homer, "it's the answer to every parent's prayers."
But, no sooner had they uttered those words, than a great puff of steam bellowed from the smoke stack, and the train pulled out of the station.
"Oh, no you don't!" Homer said, before driving onto the train tracks and racing after it.
Once they had cleared the station, they veered off the tracks and pulled up beside the train.
"JUMP!" yelled Homer over the roar of the locomotive to Bart and Lisa.
"You have got to be kidding!" said Bart in protest.
"LOT-DIDILY OF TIME!" Homer roared, through clenched teeth.
Though they had no clue what Homer was referring to, Bart and Lisa took the hint, grabbed their luggage, and made the death-defying leap from a fifty-five mile per hour car, to a sixty mile per hour train. Clutching the Hogwarts Express's side, they opened the door and pulled themselves inside.
"Goodbye Mom!" called Lisa from the doorway.
"See-ya Homer!" yelled Bart.
"Change your underwear everyday and write to us!" Marge shouted from the car. "We love you!"
"Wait!" shrieked Lisa, "Where's Snowball II?"
"I got her!" called Homer, ripping Snowball II off his back and throwing her to Lisa, "Have a nice time at prison, I mean, school!"
Then the pink car of the Simpsons pulled away from the train, and Bart and Lisa pulled the door shut.
Inside the train, the faint rumble of the wheels on the track could be heard as they went past several compartments that were full. At last, towards the end of the train, they found a compartment with only two boys in it.
"Do you mind if come in? There doesn't seem to be room anywhere else." said Lisa.
"Sure." said a boy with untidy, jet black hair and glasses. After stowing their luggage in an overhead compartment, Bart took a seat by the black-haired boy, and Lisa sat down beside a boy with flaming red hair, freckles, and a blotch of dirt on his nose. On their seats an assortment of various candies lay, halfway unwrapped.
"Did you see that nutter in the pink car?" asked the red haired boy.
"No, no!" said Lisa, changing the subject, "By the way, I'm Lisa, Lisa Simpson, and this is my brother, Bart."
"Ron Weasley." said the befreckled boy.
"Harry Potter." said the boy with glasses, extending his hand to be shaken.
"Harry Potter?" said Lisa with a look of ecstasy, "I've read about you in at least six books! Can I the, that is if it's OK, the, the scar?"
"Sure." said Harry, lifting his bangs to reveal the lightning bolt cut.
"Wait," said Bart, "you're who?"
"Join the club." said Harry, "Everyone seems to know more about me than I do."
They shook hands and all began helping themselves to sweets.
"Ron," said Lisa, "did your Dad pick us up?"
"I think he did say something about going to the states the other night, come to think of it.
"I," continued Ron, "was just telling Harry about a spell my brothers told me would turn my rat, Scabbers, yellow. Want to see?"
At that moment, a girl with bushy brown hair and buck teeth came through the door with a round faced, sobbing boy.
"Has anyone seen a-" she started to say.
"We already told him, no." said Ron slightly annoyed.
"Hey, wait a minute," the brown-haired girl said, "I know who you are, you're Harry Potter! I've read at least-"
"Six books about him." said Lisa as she finished her sentence.
"Nice to someone else who's read the course material. I'm Hermione Granger, and this is Neville Longbottom."
They introduced each other and Ron commenced in attempting a spell, "Sunshine, daisies, butter mellow, turn this stupid fat rat yellow."
"Is that even a real spell?" asked Lisa and Hermione simultaneously.
"I loved the standard book of spells." Hermione said.
"I read it five times." said Lisa matter of factly.
"Six times."
"Last night"
"This morning"
"I'm two years ahead!"
At this, they gave each other glares and Hermione said, "Come on Neville, let's check another compartment."
As soon as they had left, the compartment door slid open again. Three boys entered, one had blonde-white hair, a pointed face, and wore a smirk. The other two were thick as tree trunks and looked like bodyguards.
"This is Crabbe and this is Goyle, and my name's Malfoy, Draco Malfoy." Said the pale, blonde-haired boy.
Ron sniggered at the name.
"Think my name's funny, do you? No need to ask who you are. My father told me all the Weasleys have red hair, freckles, and more children than they can afford.
"And you, another easy question; atrocious hair and a nine-year-old, you two must be those mudblood yanks.
"You'll soon find out some wizarding families are much better than others, Potter. You don't want to go making friends with the wrong sort-"
However, before Draco had finished his speech on families, Lisa had, with a flick of her wand, shot Scabbers into his face. Draco Malfoy threw Scabbers on to the floor and, clutching a bloody nose, ran out of the compartment with Crabbe and Goyle screaming, "Watch your back, mudbloods!"
"Thanks. I think we might as well change now, Lisa if you don't mind." said Harry, looking surprised and impressed. Bart, too, felt surprised, he had never thought his sister capable of doing something like that before.
Lisa went to a neighboring compartment and they all changed into their robes. Eventually the train began to slow and they all got ready to disembark. Lisa rejoined the boys as the slowly climbed off the train and onto the platform of the Hogsmead station.
"Firs' years! Firs' years over here!" called a booming voice, "All right there Harry?" The voice was coming from a giant man with a mess of hair and a tangled beard. "C'mon, follow me – any more firs' years? Mind yer step, now! Firs' years follow me!"
"That's Hagrid." Harry told the others.
Hagrid led them down a path where, across a black lake, a castle's lights could be seen reflected on the surface, "No more'n four to a boat!"
Harry, Ron, Bart, and Lisa got into a boat and they sped away across the glassy-like surface that reflected the stars. They got off the boats in an underground harbor that seemed to be under the vast castle. They walked up a stone staircase and into an entrance hall. Hagrid knocked on a large door with a fist half the size of a basketball.
That's all for now, ch 4 might be up in a week or too because I'm very busy with vacations and camps. Reviews are always enjoyed, and don't be afraid to point out any errors in script or plot. Thanks again to thoose who reviewed! Now if you'll excuse me, I've got a snitch to catch!