Hello, all! I just want to apologize for the terribly long delay for this chapter. I'M SORRY!!! My muse deserted me for a spell, then school started on the 18th, and I just kept putting it off! But my muse returned in full force this evening, so here I am, writing fanfic, when I really should be studying for my AP Chem test tomorrow. But such is life.
Anyway, I just want to thank you all for your lovely reviews, and the birthday wishes! Your review inspire me to keep going, and always cheer me up! Also, I'd like to extend a belated birthday wish to nychick8990, whose bday was August 9! Happy belated birthday, and thank you so very much for your lovely reviews!
Here is chapter 7. Actually, I am quite pleased with this chapter. I think it is one of the best, and I am sure you all will enjoy it! So here goes nothing:
Chapter 7
Jack was now becoming a bit uncomfortable as the three stared at him with wide, disbelieving eyes. He did, however, imagine that their reaction upon hearing the news would be similar to this.
As if on cue, Elizabeth, Will, and Governor Swann all broke out at the same time into soft, nervous laughs. Just the concept of Jack Sparrow, pirate captain of the infamous Black Pearl, becoming King was so far-fetched that they figured it had to be false. If Commodore Norrington had been more of the joking type, they would be fairly certain that this would be one of his tricks, and that Jack was just in town to attend their wedding. However, Norrington was not the type to do something like this. Plus, Admiral Aston did not look surprised at all to see the new King, only a little dismayed at his stench.
"And what's so bloody funny?" Jack asked angrily at the three laughers. He was already feeling a bit out of place and annoyed, and they were not helping the matter. Upon hearing the almost hurt tone in his voice, the three stopped their nervous giggles. Maybe this was not a joke?
Elizabeth decided to speak up. She said softly, and almost nervously, "Commodore, surely you must be jesting. If you caught Captain Sparrow, I ask you to please pardon him. He most likely was only coming to Port Royal to attend our wedding-"
"We are not kidding you, Miss Swann. I was just as shocked myself. It only seems that Mr. Sparrow here has a bit of a foggy past, which he did not care to disclose to anyone."
Elizabeth's eyes narrowed. "No, Commodore, this is just not possible. I mean, this is Jack Sparrow we are talking about here! Honestly, I do not know what kind of fool you take us for, but-"
Norrington cut her off, and addressed her in a serious tone. "Miss Swann, why would I lie about such a serious matter as this? I do not take you for a fool in the least, and I know this is difficult to believe, but please try. I swear upon all that is holy that I am telling you the truth." The room was filled with silence for a long minute while everyone tried to absorb this surprising information. Jack, hands clasped behind his back and looking up at the ceiling, was beginning to feel uncomfortable under the tension in the silence and disbelieving glances coming his way.
Will decided to break the silence, and after clearing his throat nervously, piped up, addressing Jack. "So Jack, you really are-"
"Yeah, whelp. Sir Francis Johnathan Henry Stanton IV, at yer service," Jack responded, bowing to the rest of the occupants. "King of England now, I guess." He noticed that the faces still bore astonished looks.
Will, still in a state of shock, as were the other two, asked, "Why didn't you tell us?"
"Y'never asked, mate. What's past is past, an' I like to keep it that way."
"But- but Jack?" he paused, still gaping. "How, I mean-?"
Jack cut him off before he could continue. "Later, lad. I'll fill ye in later. Seems we got more important matters to take care of now, eh?" he said, noting the still-stunned expressions of the newcomers.
But not only was Governor Weatherby Swann stunned, he was appalled. They actually were considering dubbing this low-life pirate King? How absurd! They might as well give the title to the donkey at Will Turner's smithy for all he was concerned. "Admiral, you don't actually intend to dub this. . . this ruffian as King, do you?" He looked over at the pirate, who had a look of mock hurt on his face at the Governor's words.
Admiral Aston stepped forward and let out a sigh. "Governor," he addressed, "I completely understand your concerns, as I have the same fears myself. But Sir Stanton is the heir to the throne, and we have no choice in the matter."
"But, Admiral! Be reasonable. What makes you think he is qualified to rule England? He is a pirate, a low-life criminal. Plus, the man is positively mad!"
"Daft, actually," Jack corrected the older man. He got a thoughtful look on his face for a second. "Well, I have been called 'mad' by many others besides yerself, Gov'ner. Isn't th' first time I've heard that. But I don' really think I'm 'mad'-mad, so to speak. More of a 'daft'-mad, I'd say. Most people think me mad, or even madly mad, but I'm more madly daft than daftly mad, wouldn't you agree?"
For a few seconds, the other five occupants of the room stood silent, trying to decipher Jack's jumbled, cryptic words. It did not take them long to figure out that no matter how long they contemplated the words, they would never understand them. The Governor spoke again. "Like I said, the man is positively mad."
Jack frowned, a bit dismayed that nobody, save himself, understood his profound speech. "Well that may be so," he said. "But, Gov'ner?"
"What?" Swann asked impatiently, in a tone that reminded Jack of Norrington's.
"I do hope ye'll show more respect for yer King in the future," King Sparrow said with a mischievous smirk. "Now please do apologize," he added with a mischievous grin.
The Governor scoffed at the pirate before turning to the Admiral. "Admiral, this pirate is being ridiculously immature! I mean, honestly-"
After seeing Jack standing and staring at the Governor in a look of feigned anger, foot tapping in anticipation of his apology, Norrington decided to settle the matter. "Governor Swann, if I may be so bold as to intervene, I would suggest apologizing to the King. He won't let the matter go until you do, and will more than likely become more and more annoying until the apology is made." Jack made an angry face at Norrington, and Elizabeth could not help but snicker at the blatant truth in the man's words.
Governor Swann gave off a long-suffering sigh before mumbling quietly, "I apologize."
"What was that, Gov'ner?" Jack cupped a dirty, bejeweled hand to his ear and leaned towards the older man.
"I said 'I apologize,'" the Governor said, a bit louder.
"I believe you forgot one very important thing in yer apology, mate."
"I apologize. . . Your Majesty." Swann nearly shouted these last words in frustration at the pirate's immaturity. He was obviously going to use his authorities to make people do God-knows-what.
"Good. Apology accepted, my dearest Governor." Jack smiled, pleased at the Governor's eye-roll. He then turned his attention to the rest of the group. "So, I hear you fine people are holdin' a ball in my honor tonight, eh?"
The ball! Swann had been so shocked to find out the true identity of the pirate that he had not even considered if the welcoming ball would still be taking place that evening. Surely it would not be suitable to introduce all of Port Royal to their new king, who just so happened to be a pirate captain. Perhaps it would be in their best interest to cancel the event. "Well, we were going to have a welcoming ball for the King-"
His excuse was interrupted by his daughter. "Father, are you suggesting that we cancel the ball?"
Upon hearing the disbelieving tone in his daughter's voice, the Governor stammered a bit. "Well, umm. . . Dear, do you actually think that we should publicize this. . . situation? Perhaps it would be better to keep the news quiet-"
"Father, everyone in town knows about the ball by now. Wouldn't you say that it would cause a bit more commotion if for some strange reason it was canceled? I dare say that may draw a bit more attention to the situation."
Governor Swann sighed. "I suppose you are right, Elizabeth. But honestly, I am still a bit worried about this whole situation! Everyone in town is expecting a Duke; what will they think when we show them that their new king is. . . is this?"
Ignoring Jack's scowl, the Admiral joined into the conversation. "Don't fret, Governor. We shall have the King more than ready for the ball this evening. But this will be quite a task, I must say. So we really must be returning to your house soon enough," he said, trying to get the occupants of the rooms out the door of Norrington's office.
They all began to file out of the room. Governor Swann lead the way, followed by Admiral Aston. Elizabeth and Will, who were still in a state of disbelief, stood back in the room, as Jack and Norrington approached the doorway. Norrington took a step back and gestured with his arm while saying, "After you, Your Majesty," to Jack.
In turn, Jack folded his hands and gave Norrington a slight half-bow, as his normal sign of thanks. He said, "Why thank you, Jimbo," and sauntered out the door, followed closely by the Commodore. Will's eyes narrowed at the exchange. Did he just say "Jimbo?"
Norrington's head poked around the corner, and Will jumped slightly as he said, "Miss Swann, Mr. Turner, are you coming?"
"We're right behind you, Commodore," Elizabeth answered for them, as Will could only nod dumbly. Elizabeth took his arm and they walked out of the room and into one of the fort's many corridors, following the group in front of them, still quite dumbfounded. Jack? King? They were still not quite convinced this wasn't a trick, but if it was true. . . let's just say that the world would never be the same again.
They exited the fort and stepped down to the street where two carriages were awaiting them. The Admiral and the Governor climbed into the first one, which quickly sped away, up the hill towards the Governor's mansion. Jack approached the second carriage, flung open the door, and hastily jumped in. Norrington, clearly dismayed at the pirate's lack of manners, sighed and shook his head while he gestured for Will and Elizabeth to enter. He then climbed in, closed the door, and they were off.
As their carriage began its journey through Port Royal and up to the Governor's mansion on top of the hill, Elizabeth looked over at Jack. He was sitting across from her and Will, and was obviously trying to avoid all eye contact with them. Most likely because of this "little" secret he had been keeping from all of them. However, there was absolutely no way that she would allow him to keep quiet about his story, and leave Will and herself in the dark. So she asked him the question that he least wanted to hear, which was quite obvious by his wide-eyed reaction.
"Well, Captain Sparrow, we do have about half an hour left until we arrive back at the house. Isn't there something you would like to share with Will and myself?"
Will looked up at her. He, too, was more than eager to hear about his friend's mysterious past. "Yes, Jack, please do tell us."
Jack sharply raised his gaze to her face as she addressed him. He smiled nervously and tapped his fingers on his chin, as if in deep thought, before responding, "All right, all right. I already told my little tale to the Commodore an' his little mates," his waving hands gestured to Commodore Norrington, who was seated next to him. "But I guess I can repeat it for ye both, just outta the goodness of me black heart."
Will and Elizabeth leaned forward in anticipation. It was a rare occasion that they could get Jack to tell them anything about his past, and it was likely that this may be one of the most interesting subjects of his foggy past. Elizabeth said, "Thank you, Jack. You can probably imagine just how curious we are."
And it was true. Never in all her days had Elizabeth imagined Jack to be from any sort of prominent family at all. She, like most people who knew the pirate, figured him to be just another whelp of some Tortugan "Lady of the Evening." She had never even seen the man exemplify any sort of propriety that was required of aristocracy. Needless to say, she was positively blown away to discover that this pirate was of a higher rank in society than she herself was!
Jack answered her, "I know, love, I know. Now I want you two to listen, an' listen good. 'Cause Ol' Uncle Jack's got a story fer the two of ye. . ."
(scene break: since 's being such a lovely wench this evening. . .)
"Welcome to the Governor's Mansion, your Majesty."
Jack was too busy taking in the complete wealthy appearance of the house that he ignored the Admiral's greeting. 'Well, there's no doubt that Lizzie's more than able to provide for her an' the whelp,' he thought as he examined the massive gold and crystal chandelier, the paintings and tapestries that covered the walls, and the marble floors. And all that was only in the foyer! Jack couldn't remember the last time he had been in a house this fancy since. . . well, since he lived in one, he guessed.
"Nice, cozy little place ye got here, Gov'ner!" he said, heartily slapping the older man on the back while making his way around the room, examining various decorations.
"Erm, well, thank you. . . your Majesty," the Governor said, a bit reluctantly. However, he could see the King was coming dangerously close to slipping a few "treasures" into his pockets, so he decided it was best to draw the man's attention elsewhere. "Now why don't we show you to your quarters? We really must be preparing for this evening."
Jack swallowed. He had a vague picture in his mind of what the "preparations" would involve, and he did not like it one bit. "Alright," he said, trying to use a jovial tone, but failing miserably, "Lead the way."
"Of course. Admiral, would you mind taking the King to his chambers and begin getting him ready for the ball? Elizabeth and I must begin preparing the house for the guests." The Governor sent a knowing look over to the Admiral, and he nodded, expressing that he knew what needed to be done.
"Well, Governor, it would be my pleasure; however, I really must return to my work. Now that the King has been located, I have many letters to write to England and to the other Colonies. And I must complete them as soon as possible. But perhaps Commodore Norrington and Mr. Turner would be willing to help?" he now turned to the two men in question and flashed them a hopeful glance.
James and Will looked at each other, as if questioning whether they should assist or not, before nodding consent. "We'd be glad to help, Admiral," the Commodore said respectfully.
However, Jack did not seem to think this was such a great idea. Who were these people to think that they could make their King take a bath? How dare they? But when the others were talking, he decided to seize the opportune moment, and was slowly inching towards the still-open front door in hopes of making an escape. He was only a few metres away, within just a few more steps of freedom, when attention was once again drawn to him. "Your Majesty," Norrington called, smirking as he realized that he had upset the pirate's escape plans. "Won't you please follow us upstairs?"
'Bloody Norrington!' Jack thought as he put on a false grin and headed back to the staircase. He sighed as he said, "Fine, Jimbo, fine. Let's go," and followed the military man up the stairs.
Will hung behind, taking slow steps to follow the two up the stairs. He looked back at his wife-to-be, who was being led to the kitchen by her father to help prepare the house. She looked over her shoulder and mouthed, "Good luck."
And Will knew they would need it. The day Jack Sparrow would willingly take a bath would be the same day that the odorous pirate would be King of England. Oh wait, he was. Time for a new analogy.
(Scene break number 2)
As the Swanns went about their preparations for the evening's events, and as Admiral Aston proceeded to inform the world of England's newfound King, James Norrington and William Turner II found themselves in charge of the most difficult task available. That of making Captain Jack Sparrow look presentable.
James sighed as the irate pirate captain proceeded to storm about his bedchamber. The man had been relatively calm throughout the previous proceedings, but had been pushed over the edge, so to speak, at the sight of the bathtub filled with water, set in the back of the rather large room. Plus, the razor, scissors, and hairbrush sitting on the side table did not help with the matter. Neither did the fancy, uncomfortable-looking clothes hanging by the dressing curtain. Nor did the white wig, which looked quite similar to that of the Commodore.
The man had been pacing angrily about the room for the past few minutes, muttering things like "Jack Sparrow don't take bloody baths" and "They'll not touch my hair!" under his breath. Will was sitting in a chair in the corner, clearly growing bored with the scene. But James had finally had enough.
"Your Majesty, I suggest you stop your ranting and just get in the tub. You're only delaying the inevitable."
Jack paused in mid-step and turned to face the Commodore. "Pardon me, Jimbo, but who are YOU to tell the King that he's gotta take a bloody bath?" he nearly yelled.
Norrington took a step closer to the pirate, clearly unperturbed by his anger. "I made it perfectly clear to you earlier today that part of the agreement was that you had to LOOK the part of King. And, in your current state, you most definitely do not. Whether you like it or not, Your Majesty, you will not leave this room until you are cleaned, shaved, and dressed properly. Am I understood?"
Jack, sneering at the Commodore, plopped down on the edge of the bed, crossing his arms, looking the part of a spoiled child. "Well then I guess I ain't leavin' for quite some time then," he said darkly and turned away from a seething Norrington.
A thought came into Will's mind of how to handle the situation. He learned long ago that it really isn't hard as it seems to get the stubborn pirate to do as you want. All one really must do is use a bit of reverse psychology. He stood up and walked over to where James was standing in the corner. "It's all right, James," he said, in a patient voice. "After all, it's not Jack's fault he's afraid of water." Will said this smoothly, and added a wink in Norrington's direction at the end. The two smiled, clearly seeing the pirate tense at these words.
The Commodore grinned, knowing exactly what Turner was getting at. "You're right, Will. I should've seen it before. Who would've thought that the fearless Captain Jack Sparrow would be so afraid of water that he would refuse to take a little bath? Poor lad. I suppose we should give him a bit more time to work up his nerve."
Jack, whose back was still facing the two, slowly turned around to face the Commodore and the blacksmith, who were trying to keep straight faces. He gave them a dark, threatening glare, and said slowly in a low, angry voice, "Ye can't fool Captain Jack Sparrow, lads. I. Ain't. Afraid. Of. Water. Savvy?" he said, punctuating each word separately.
Will looked at the pirate, who was barely managing to keep his anger under control. "It's all right, Jack," he said kindly, "You don't have to lie to us. We understand, and we promise we won't tell too many people about it."
"WHELP!" Jack yelled, bolting to his feet and dashing across the room to where Will and James were standing. He was in their faces in no time, clearly angry at them. What did they take him for, some lily-livered pansy? His voice now soft, low, and dangerous, he said to them, "Now I want you two to listen, an' listen good. I'm a pirate, lads. And not just any pirate, th' best ruddy pirate in th' Caribbean. And pirates are NEVER afraid of water. We live on the bloody ocean, for Christ's sake. Read my flapping lips. Captain Jack Sparrow Ain't Afraid Of Nothin'. Especially Water." After his speech he paused and took a step back from them, trying to calm himself down.
However, all the anger Jack had rid himself of was quickly reinstated when Will and James turned to each other and said in unison, "Denial."
His logic being completely blinded by fury, Jack was determined to prove their foolish belief wrong. Before any of them could say "rum," Jack had pulled off his boots, unbuckled his belt, untied his sash, and threw them all onto the floor. He proceeded to pull off his dirty white shirt, which landed atop the heap of clothing now littering the otherwise clean room. Before long, his vest and breeches were off, too, and the pirate ran across the room in naught but his skivvies and jumped into the bathtub, creating a gigantic splash. Norrington cringed as the curtains and wall became soaked, but was otherwise pleased that they had managed to get the pirate into the tub.
"Ha!" Jack laughed, still unaware of the ruse. "I told ye Captain Jack Sparrow wasn't afraid of water!" His triumphant grin, however, slowly turned to a frown as he realized what had just taken place. Norrington and Turner smiled at each other and shook each other's hand in congratulations.
Jack looked around in dismay, upset to be sitting in a bathtub. Especially a bathtub that he was fooled into entering. "Well, you two think ye're pretty darn smart, now, don't ye?"
Norrington smirked, taking much pleasure in his triumph. "Why, yes, Captain Sparrow, we do think so."
Will laughed at his friend's dismay. "Sorry, Jack, but it's the only thing we could think of to get you in the tub. But now that you're in there, you might as well finish cleaning up."
Jack sighed. "Fine, fine, fine." He shuddered as he looked at the water, which was slowly turning brown from the dirt coming off his body. He really wanted nothing more than to be out of that bloody tub! There was no dignified pirate that would ever be caught dead taking a bath. Especially not Captain Jack Sparrow. He had to escape. But how?
Looking towards the window, a thought popped into his head. He turned to face Will and the Commodore, who were still grinning haughtily to themselves. "I don't suppose yer King could have a bit of privacy, aye? I mean, I don't really take well to bathing for an audience."
"Of course, Your Majesty. Mr. Turner and I don't really care to watch, either." The two men nodded consent and began to walk toward the door. Right before he closed the door, Norrington popped his head back through the door. "Sparrow?"
"Aye?"
"Don't forget to use the soap." With that, he closed the door, leaving the King alone and unsupervised.
"Oh yes, Commodore, I'll be sure to use the bloody soap," he said to himself in a quiet mocking voice, as he sat in the tub awaiting the opportune moment.
(Yet another scene break)
Jack sat in the tub for another few seconds just to make sure the coast was clear. When he was sure that the two men wouldn't be entering anytime soon, he deftly hopped out of the tub and moved quietly towards the large bed, stripping the sheets off. He tied them together tightly, creating a makeshift rope he planned to use for his escape. As soon as the rope was finished, he quietly ran to the balcony and tied one end to the railing, leaving the rest fall towards the ground. This would be much easier if he were not on the third floor.
Jack went back inside to get dressed. After all, what would people think if they saw a sopping wet pirate running around in nothing but his skivvies? Surely that would not be the most dignified thing he had ever done.
But just as he had picked up his shirt to pull on, a loud knock came at the door. Norrington's muffled voice said, "Your Majesty? I'm coming in." Obviously the man was expecting something to this nature.
Not having time to put on his clothes, Jack quickly grabbed his gray overcoat and thrust his arms into the sleeves as he ran to the balcony. He quickly leapt over the side and slid down the makeshift rope. As soon as his feet hit the ground, he ran at top speed through the Governor's gardens, only hoping that nobody had seen him. He leapt over some hedges and swiftly climbed up the side of the iron fence. After making an ungainly landing on the other side, he strolled down the road. He clutched his coat shut, trying to look as normal as possible while walking down the road soaking wet and bare-legged.
Now all he had to do was find a way off this Godforsaken rock.
And he would find a way off the only way any decent pirate would. He'd commandeer a ship.
As he neared the docks, Jack set his sights on a small schooner anchored in the harbor. She looked to be unguarded, and would be easily handled by one man. Plus, by the time the Navy would realize he was no longer on the island and make the Dauntless ready for pursuit, he could be in Tortuga, having a round or three of rum with his crew. Yes, this plan might just work. Might.
Jack turned around to advance toward a small rowboat lying on the beach. However, he had not expected to walk right into a pair of Redcoats.
"Good day, Gentlemen, I'm terribly sorry to be gettin' in yer way. But I have an important appointment t'keep, so I must be going." Jack tried to turn away and quickly leave, but was seized by the arms by the two men.
"Terribly sorry, pirate, but you'll just have to be missing that appointment. I believe the Commodore would like to see you. But don't worry, he would be more than happy to make you another appointment with the gallows."
(And another scene break. . .)
"What do you mean 'he ran away?' How could he escape? All you had to do was get him to take a bath!" Admiral Aston's chubby face was flushed blood red with anger as he berated James Norrington and Will Turner as if they were two small children. The Governor, too, was there, pacing nervously about the parlor. Elizabeth was sitting next to her fiance, holding his hand for a bit of moral support as Will blushed at the embarrassment.
Norrington felt rather embarrassed, too. He had only left Sparrow alone for a couple minutes! When he had thought it wise to check that the pirate had not done anything stupid, he entered the room only to find nothing in the tub but dirty brown water. He had followed the trail of puddles on the floor to the balcony, where the bedsheets had been formed into a rope to assist with the pirate's escape. And once again, Jack Sparrow had made an ass out of him! The man was positively incorrigible!
"Admiral, if you would give me a chance to explain-"
"Explain?! What is there to explain, Commodore? Are you going to explain to me how you let the man whom we have been searching for for months slip out of the house, right under your nose? Yes, Commodore, do explain. I would love to hear it!"
Will spoke to the positively livid man. "Pardon my intrusion, Admiral, but it was not the Commodore's fault. The King ordered that we leave the room while he bathed, and managed to escape in less than a few minutes."
The Admiral turned to Will. "Mr. Turner, that must be the poorest excuse I have ever heard. Now, I swear, if we do not find Sir Francis-"
Both Will and James silently blessed whoever knocked at the front door, interrupting Aston's diatribe. Norrington took the liberty of going to answer it, and was almost knocked off his feet with surprise when he opened the door.
There stood two soldiers, each holding an arm of the soaking wet form of Jack Sparrow. Said pirate was not only soaking wet, but wearing nothing but his overcoat and his skivvies.
"Sir," one of the soldiers addressed Norrington, "We found this pirate down at the docks-"
Before the lad could get out another word, the Commodore had grabbed Sparrow from them, yanked him inside the mansion, and slammed the door in the faces of the two bewildered soldiers.
Still holding firmly onto Jack's arm, Norrington proceeded to quickly lead him into the parlor where the rest of the group was waiting. As soon as the two entered, everyone in the room sighed in relief to see that the King had not run away. This, of course, was quickly followed by a gasp and a giggle from Elizabeth at Jack's appearance, as her father covered her eyes.
"No need to worry anymore," Norrington announced proudly. "It looks like our King has been found."
"'Ello, everyone!" Jack waved at them all, trying to lighten the tense mood of the room. "I see ye all missed ol' Jack."
The Commodore released Jack's arm, and could barely contain a slight laugh as he looked at the pirate's attire, or lack thereof. "Your Majesty, is there any particular reason why you decided to climb out a window, jump some fences, crawl through bushes, and run around through Port Royal wearing nothing but your overcoat and your undergarments?"
Jack grinned and put his hands up. "Pirate."
Well, that's it for chapter 7! Pretty long, eh? I hope you enjoyed it.
Tune in next time to see Jack get prettified! Uh oh. . .
Now, go click that little blue button and leave me a nice little review! I know you want to. . . and plus, all reviewers will get a Captain Jack Sparrow 18 inch talking action figure, which are due out in October! Wahoo I can't wait. Ta for now!
Anyway, I just want to thank you all for your lovely reviews, and the birthday wishes! Your review inspire me to keep going, and always cheer me up! Also, I'd like to extend a belated birthday wish to nychick8990, whose bday was August 9! Happy belated birthday, and thank you so very much for your lovely reviews!
Here is chapter 7. Actually, I am quite pleased with this chapter. I think it is one of the best, and I am sure you all will enjoy it! So here goes nothing:
Chapter 7
Jack was now becoming a bit uncomfortable as the three stared at him with wide, disbelieving eyes. He did, however, imagine that their reaction upon hearing the news would be similar to this.
As if on cue, Elizabeth, Will, and Governor Swann all broke out at the same time into soft, nervous laughs. Just the concept of Jack Sparrow, pirate captain of the infamous Black Pearl, becoming King was so far-fetched that they figured it had to be false. If Commodore Norrington had been more of the joking type, they would be fairly certain that this would be one of his tricks, and that Jack was just in town to attend their wedding. However, Norrington was not the type to do something like this. Plus, Admiral Aston did not look surprised at all to see the new King, only a little dismayed at his stench.
"And what's so bloody funny?" Jack asked angrily at the three laughers. He was already feeling a bit out of place and annoyed, and they were not helping the matter. Upon hearing the almost hurt tone in his voice, the three stopped their nervous giggles. Maybe this was not a joke?
Elizabeth decided to speak up. She said softly, and almost nervously, "Commodore, surely you must be jesting. If you caught Captain Sparrow, I ask you to please pardon him. He most likely was only coming to Port Royal to attend our wedding-"
"We are not kidding you, Miss Swann. I was just as shocked myself. It only seems that Mr. Sparrow here has a bit of a foggy past, which he did not care to disclose to anyone."
Elizabeth's eyes narrowed. "No, Commodore, this is just not possible. I mean, this is Jack Sparrow we are talking about here! Honestly, I do not know what kind of fool you take us for, but-"
Norrington cut her off, and addressed her in a serious tone. "Miss Swann, why would I lie about such a serious matter as this? I do not take you for a fool in the least, and I know this is difficult to believe, but please try. I swear upon all that is holy that I am telling you the truth." The room was filled with silence for a long minute while everyone tried to absorb this surprising information. Jack, hands clasped behind his back and looking up at the ceiling, was beginning to feel uncomfortable under the tension in the silence and disbelieving glances coming his way.
Will decided to break the silence, and after clearing his throat nervously, piped up, addressing Jack. "So Jack, you really are-"
"Yeah, whelp. Sir Francis Johnathan Henry Stanton IV, at yer service," Jack responded, bowing to the rest of the occupants. "King of England now, I guess." He noticed that the faces still bore astonished looks.
Will, still in a state of shock, as were the other two, asked, "Why didn't you tell us?"
"Y'never asked, mate. What's past is past, an' I like to keep it that way."
"But- but Jack?" he paused, still gaping. "How, I mean-?"
Jack cut him off before he could continue. "Later, lad. I'll fill ye in later. Seems we got more important matters to take care of now, eh?" he said, noting the still-stunned expressions of the newcomers.
But not only was Governor Weatherby Swann stunned, he was appalled. They actually were considering dubbing this low-life pirate King? How absurd! They might as well give the title to the donkey at Will Turner's smithy for all he was concerned. "Admiral, you don't actually intend to dub this. . . this ruffian as King, do you?" He looked over at the pirate, who had a look of mock hurt on his face at the Governor's words.
Admiral Aston stepped forward and let out a sigh. "Governor," he addressed, "I completely understand your concerns, as I have the same fears myself. But Sir Stanton is the heir to the throne, and we have no choice in the matter."
"But, Admiral! Be reasonable. What makes you think he is qualified to rule England? He is a pirate, a low-life criminal. Plus, the man is positively mad!"
"Daft, actually," Jack corrected the older man. He got a thoughtful look on his face for a second. "Well, I have been called 'mad' by many others besides yerself, Gov'ner. Isn't th' first time I've heard that. But I don' really think I'm 'mad'-mad, so to speak. More of a 'daft'-mad, I'd say. Most people think me mad, or even madly mad, but I'm more madly daft than daftly mad, wouldn't you agree?"
For a few seconds, the other five occupants of the room stood silent, trying to decipher Jack's jumbled, cryptic words. It did not take them long to figure out that no matter how long they contemplated the words, they would never understand them. The Governor spoke again. "Like I said, the man is positively mad."
Jack frowned, a bit dismayed that nobody, save himself, understood his profound speech. "Well that may be so," he said. "But, Gov'ner?"
"What?" Swann asked impatiently, in a tone that reminded Jack of Norrington's.
"I do hope ye'll show more respect for yer King in the future," King Sparrow said with a mischievous smirk. "Now please do apologize," he added with a mischievous grin.
The Governor scoffed at the pirate before turning to the Admiral. "Admiral, this pirate is being ridiculously immature! I mean, honestly-"
After seeing Jack standing and staring at the Governor in a look of feigned anger, foot tapping in anticipation of his apology, Norrington decided to settle the matter. "Governor Swann, if I may be so bold as to intervene, I would suggest apologizing to the King. He won't let the matter go until you do, and will more than likely become more and more annoying until the apology is made." Jack made an angry face at Norrington, and Elizabeth could not help but snicker at the blatant truth in the man's words.
Governor Swann gave off a long-suffering sigh before mumbling quietly, "I apologize."
"What was that, Gov'ner?" Jack cupped a dirty, bejeweled hand to his ear and leaned towards the older man.
"I said 'I apologize,'" the Governor said, a bit louder.
"I believe you forgot one very important thing in yer apology, mate."
"I apologize. . . Your Majesty." Swann nearly shouted these last words in frustration at the pirate's immaturity. He was obviously going to use his authorities to make people do God-knows-what.
"Good. Apology accepted, my dearest Governor." Jack smiled, pleased at the Governor's eye-roll. He then turned his attention to the rest of the group. "So, I hear you fine people are holdin' a ball in my honor tonight, eh?"
The ball! Swann had been so shocked to find out the true identity of the pirate that he had not even considered if the welcoming ball would still be taking place that evening. Surely it would not be suitable to introduce all of Port Royal to their new king, who just so happened to be a pirate captain. Perhaps it would be in their best interest to cancel the event. "Well, we were going to have a welcoming ball for the King-"
His excuse was interrupted by his daughter. "Father, are you suggesting that we cancel the ball?"
Upon hearing the disbelieving tone in his daughter's voice, the Governor stammered a bit. "Well, umm. . . Dear, do you actually think that we should publicize this. . . situation? Perhaps it would be better to keep the news quiet-"
"Father, everyone in town knows about the ball by now. Wouldn't you say that it would cause a bit more commotion if for some strange reason it was canceled? I dare say that may draw a bit more attention to the situation."
Governor Swann sighed. "I suppose you are right, Elizabeth. But honestly, I am still a bit worried about this whole situation! Everyone in town is expecting a Duke; what will they think when we show them that their new king is. . . is this?"
Ignoring Jack's scowl, the Admiral joined into the conversation. "Don't fret, Governor. We shall have the King more than ready for the ball this evening. But this will be quite a task, I must say. So we really must be returning to your house soon enough," he said, trying to get the occupants of the rooms out the door of Norrington's office.
They all began to file out of the room. Governor Swann lead the way, followed by Admiral Aston. Elizabeth and Will, who were still in a state of disbelief, stood back in the room, as Jack and Norrington approached the doorway. Norrington took a step back and gestured with his arm while saying, "After you, Your Majesty," to Jack.
In turn, Jack folded his hands and gave Norrington a slight half-bow, as his normal sign of thanks. He said, "Why thank you, Jimbo," and sauntered out the door, followed closely by the Commodore. Will's eyes narrowed at the exchange. Did he just say "Jimbo?"
Norrington's head poked around the corner, and Will jumped slightly as he said, "Miss Swann, Mr. Turner, are you coming?"
"We're right behind you, Commodore," Elizabeth answered for them, as Will could only nod dumbly. Elizabeth took his arm and they walked out of the room and into one of the fort's many corridors, following the group in front of them, still quite dumbfounded. Jack? King? They were still not quite convinced this wasn't a trick, but if it was true. . . let's just say that the world would never be the same again.
They exited the fort and stepped down to the street where two carriages were awaiting them. The Admiral and the Governor climbed into the first one, which quickly sped away, up the hill towards the Governor's mansion. Jack approached the second carriage, flung open the door, and hastily jumped in. Norrington, clearly dismayed at the pirate's lack of manners, sighed and shook his head while he gestured for Will and Elizabeth to enter. He then climbed in, closed the door, and they were off.
As their carriage began its journey through Port Royal and up to the Governor's mansion on top of the hill, Elizabeth looked over at Jack. He was sitting across from her and Will, and was obviously trying to avoid all eye contact with them. Most likely because of this "little" secret he had been keeping from all of them. However, there was absolutely no way that she would allow him to keep quiet about his story, and leave Will and herself in the dark. So she asked him the question that he least wanted to hear, which was quite obvious by his wide-eyed reaction.
"Well, Captain Sparrow, we do have about half an hour left until we arrive back at the house. Isn't there something you would like to share with Will and myself?"
Will looked up at her. He, too, was more than eager to hear about his friend's mysterious past. "Yes, Jack, please do tell us."
Jack sharply raised his gaze to her face as she addressed him. He smiled nervously and tapped his fingers on his chin, as if in deep thought, before responding, "All right, all right. I already told my little tale to the Commodore an' his little mates," his waving hands gestured to Commodore Norrington, who was seated next to him. "But I guess I can repeat it for ye both, just outta the goodness of me black heart."
Will and Elizabeth leaned forward in anticipation. It was a rare occasion that they could get Jack to tell them anything about his past, and it was likely that this may be one of the most interesting subjects of his foggy past. Elizabeth said, "Thank you, Jack. You can probably imagine just how curious we are."
And it was true. Never in all her days had Elizabeth imagined Jack to be from any sort of prominent family at all. She, like most people who knew the pirate, figured him to be just another whelp of some Tortugan "Lady of the Evening." She had never even seen the man exemplify any sort of propriety that was required of aristocracy. Needless to say, she was positively blown away to discover that this pirate was of a higher rank in society than she herself was!
Jack answered her, "I know, love, I know. Now I want you two to listen, an' listen good. 'Cause Ol' Uncle Jack's got a story fer the two of ye. . ."
(scene break: since 's being such a lovely wench this evening. . .)
"Welcome to the Governor's Mansion, your Majesty."
Jack was too busy taking in the complete wealthy appearance of the house that he ignored the Admiral's greeting. 'Well, there's no doubt that Lizzie's more than able to provide for her an' the whelp,' he thought as he examined the massive gold and crystal chandelier, the paintings and tapestries that covered the walls, and the marble floors. And all that was only in the foyer! Jack couldn't remember the last time he had been in a house this fancy since. . . well, since he lived in one, he guessed.
"Nice, cozy little place ye got here, Gov'ner!" he said, heartily slapping the older man on the back while making his way around the room, examining various decorations.
"Erm, well, thank you. . . your Majesty," the Governor said, a bit reluctantly. However, he could see the King was coming dangerously close to slipping a few "treasures" into his pockets, so he decided it was best to draw the man's attention elsewhere. "Now why don't we show you to your quarters? We really must be preparing for this evening."
Jack swallowed. He had a vague picture in his mind of what the "preparations" would involve, and he did not like it one bit. "Alright," he said, trying to use a jovial tone, but failing miserably, "Lead the way."
"Of course. Admiral, would you mind taking the King to his chambers and begin getting him ready for the ball? Elizabeth and I must begin preparing the house for the guests." The Governor sent a knowing look over to the Admiral, and he nodded, expressing that he knew what needed to be done.
"Well, Governor, it would be my pleasure; however, I really must return to my work. Now that the King has been located, I have many letters to write to England and to the other Colonies. And I must complete them as soon as possible. But perhaps Commodore Norrington and Mr. Turner would be willing to help?" he now turned to the two men in question and flashed them a hopeful glance.
James and Will looked at each other, as if questioning whether they should assist or not, before nodding consent. "We'd be glad to help, Admiral," the Commodore said respectfully.
However, Jack did not seem to think this was such a great idea. Who were these people to think that they could make their King take a bath? How dare they? But when the others were talking, he decided to seize the opportune moment, and was slowly inching towards the still-open front door in hopes of making an escape. He was only a few metres away, within just a few more steps of freedom, when attention was once again drawn to him. "Your Majesty," Norrington called, smirking as he realized that he had upset the pirate's escape plans. "Won't you please follow us upstairs?"
'Bloody Norrington!' Jack thought as he put on a false grin and headed back to the staircase. He sighed as he said, "Fine, Jimbo, fine. Let's go," and followed the military man up the stairs.
Will hung behind, taking slow steps to follow the two up the stairs. He looked back at his wife-to-be, who was being led to the kitchen by her father to help prepare the house. She looked over her shoulder and mouthed, "Good luck."
And Will knew they would need it. The day Jack Sparrow would willingly take a bath would be the same day that the odorous pirate would be King of England. Oh wait, he was. Time for a new analogy.
(Scene break number 2)
As the Swanns went about their preparations for the evening's events, and as Admiral Aston proceeded to inform the world of England's newfound King, James Norrington and William Turner II found themselves in charge of the most difficult task available. That of making Captain Jack Sparrow look presentable.
James sighed as the irate pirate captain proceeded to storm about his bedchamber. The man had been relatively calm throughout the previous proceedings, but had been pushed over the edge, so to speak, at the sight of the bathtub filled with water, set in the back of the rather large room. Plus, the razor, scissors, and hairbrush sitting on the side table did not help with the matter. Neither did the fancy, uncomfortable-looking clothes hanging by the dressing curtain. Nor did the white wig, which looked quite similar to that of the Commodore.
The man had been pacing angrily about the room for the past few minutes, muttering things like "Jack Sparrow don't take bloody baths" and "They'll not touch my hair!" under his breath. Will was sitting in a chair in the corner, clearly growing bored with the scene. But James had finally had enough.
"Your Majesty, I suggest you stop your ranting and just get in the tub. You're only delaying the inevitable."
Jack paused in mid-step and turned to face the Commodore. "Pardon me, Jimbo, but who are YOU to tell the King that he's gotta take a bloody bath?" he nearly yelled.
Norrington took a step closer to the pirate, clearly unperturbed by his anger. "I made it perfectly clear to you earlier today that part of the agreement was that you had to LOOK the part of King. And, in your current state, you most definitely do not. Whether you like it or not, Your Majesty, you will not leave this room until you are cleaned, shaved, and dressed properly. Am I understood?"
Jack, sneering at the Commodore, plopped down on the edge of the bed, crossing his arms, looking the part of a spoiled child. "Well then I guess I ain't leavin' for quite some time then," he said darkly and turned away from a seething Norrington.
A thought came into Will's mind of how to handle the situation. He learned long ago that it really isn't hard as it seems to get the stubborn pirate to do as you want. All one really must do is use a bit of reverse psychology. He stood up and walked over to where James was standing in the corner. "It's all right, James," he said, in a patient voice. "After all, it's not Jack's fault he's afraid of water." Will said this smoothly, and added a wink in Norrington's direction at the end. The two smiled, clearly seeing the pirate tense at these words.
The Commodore grinned, knowing exactly what Turner was getting at. "You're right, Will. I should've seen it before. Who would've thought that the fearless Captain Jack Sparrow would be so afraid of water that he would refuse to take a little bath? Poor lad. I suppose we should give him a bit more time to work up his nerve."
Jack, whose back was still facing the two, slowly turned around to face the Commodore and the blacksmith, who were trying to keep straight faces. He gave them a dark, threatening glare, and said slowly in a low, angry voice, "Ye can't fool Captain Jack Sparrow, lads. I. Ain't. Afraid. Of. Water. Savvy?" he said, punctuating each word separately.
Will looked at the pirate, who was barely managing to keep his anger under control. "It's all right, Jack," he said kindly, "You don't have to lie to us. We understand, and we promise we won't tell too many people about it."
"WHELP!" Jack yelled, bolting to his feet and dashing across the room to where Will and James were standing. He was in their faces in no time, clearly angry at them. What did they take him for, some lily-livered pansy? His voice now soft, low, and dangerous, he said to them, "Now I want you two to listen, an' listen good. I'm a pirate, lads. And not just any pirate, th' best ruddy pirate in th' Caribbean. And pirates are NEVER afraid of water. We live on the bloody ocean, for Christ's sake. Read my flapping lips. Captain Jack Sparrow Ain't Afraid Of Nothin'. Especially Water." After his speech he paused and took a step back from them, trying to calm himself down.
However, all the anger Jack had rid himself of was quickly reinstated when Will and James turned to each other and said in unison, "Denial."
His logic being completely blinded by fury, Jack was determined to prove their foolish belief wrong. Before any of them could say "rum," Jack had pulled off his boots, unbuckled his belt, untied his sash, and threw them all onto the floor. He proceeded to pull off his dirty white shirt, which landed atop the heap of clothing now littering the otherwise clean room. Before long, his vest and breeches were off, too, and the pirate ran across the room in naught but his skivvies and jumped into the bathtub, creating a gigantic splash. Norrington cringed as the curtains and wall became soaked, but was otherwise pleased that they had managed to get the pirate into the tub.
"Ha!" Jack laughed, still unaware of the ruse. "I told ye Captain Jack Sparrow wasn't afraid of water!" His triumphant grin, however, slowly turned to a frown as he realized what had just taken place. Norrington and Turner smiled at each other and shook each other's hand in congratulations.
Jack looked around in dismay, upset to be sitting in a bathtub. Especially a bathtub that he was fooled into entering. "Well, you two think ye're pretty darn smart, now, don't ye?"
Norrington smirked, taking much pleasure in his triumph. "Why, yes, Captain Sparrow, we do think so."
Will laughed at his friend's dismay. "Sorry, Jack, but it's the only thing we could think of to get you in the tub. But now that you're in there, you might as well finish cleaning up."
Jack sighed. "Fine, fine, fine." He shuddered as he looked at the water, which was slowly turning brown from the dirt coming off his body. He really wanted nothing more than to be out of that bloody tub! There was no dignified pirate that would ever be caught dead taking a bath. Especially not Captain Jack Sparrow. He had to escape. But how?
Looking towards the window, a thought popped into his head. He turned to face Will and the Commodore, who were still grinning haughtily to themselves. "I don't suppose yer King could have a bit of privacy, aye? I mean, I don't really take well to bathing for an audience."
"Of course, Your Majesty. Mr. Turner and I don't really care to watch, either." The two men nodded consent and began to walk toward the door. Right before he closed the door, Norrington popped his head back through the door. "Sparrow?"
"Aye?"
"Don't forget to use the soap." With that, he closed the door, leaving the King alone and unsupervised.
"Oh yes, Commodore, I'll be sure to use the bloody soap," he said to himself in a quiet mocking voice, as he sat in the tub awaiting the opportune moment.
(Yet another scene break)
Jack sat in the tub for another few seconds just to make sure the coast was clear. When he was sure that the two men wouldn't be entering anytime soon, he deftly hopped out of the tub and moved quietly towards the large bed, stripping the sheets off. He tied them together tightly, creating a makeshift rope he planned to use for his escape. As soon as the rope was finished, he quietly ran to the balcony and tied one end to the railing, leaving the rest fall towards the ground. This would be much easier if he were not on the third floor.
Jack went back inside to get dressed. After all, what would people think if they saw a sopping wet pirate running around in nothing but his skivvies? Surely that would not be the most dignified thing he had ever done.
But just as he had picked up his shirt to pull on, a loud knock came at the door. Norrington's muffled voice said, "Your Majesty? I'm coming in." Obviously the man was expecting something to this nature.
Not having time to put on his clothes, Jack quickly grabbed his gray overcoat and thrust his arms into the sleeves as he ran to the balcony. He quickly leapt over the side and slid down the makeshift rope. As soon as his feet hit the ground, he ran at top speed through the Governor's gardens, only hoping that nobody had seen him. He leapt over some hedges and swiftly climbed up the side of the iron fence. After making an ungainly landing on the other side, he strolled down the road. He clutched his coat shut, trying to look as normal as possible while walking down the road soaking wet and bare-legged.
Now all he had to do was find a way off this Godforsaken rock.
And he would find a way off the only way any decent pirate would. He'd commandeer a ship.
As he neared the docks, Jack set his sights on a small schooner anchored in the harbor. She looked to be unguarded, and would be easily handled by one man. Plus, by the time the Navy would realize he was no longer on the island and make the Dauntless ready for pursuit, he could be in Tortuga, having a round or three of rum with his crew. Yes, this plan might just work. Might.
Jack turned around to advance toward a small rowboat lying on the beach. However, he had not expected to walk right into a pair of Redcoats.
"Good day, Gentlemen, I'm terribly sorry to be gettin' in yer way. But I have an important appointment t'keep, so I must be going." Jack tried to turn away and quickly leave, but was seized by the arms by the two men.
"Terribly sorry, pirate, but you'll just have to be missing that appointment. I believe the Commodore would like to see you. But don't worry, he would be more than happy to make you another appointment with the gallows."
(And another scene break. . .)
"What do you mean 'he ran away?' How could he escape? All you had to do was get him to take a bath!" Admiral Aston's chubby face was flushed blood red with anger as he berated James Norrington and Will Turner as if they were two small children. The Governor, too, was there, pacing nervously about the parlor. Elizabeth was sitting next to her fiance, holding his hand for a bit of moral support as Will blushed at the embarrassment.
Norrington felt rather embarrassed, too. He had only left Sparrow alone for a couple minutes! When he had thought it wise to check that the pirate had not done anything stupid, he entered the room only to find nothing in the tub but dirty brown water. He had followed the trail of puddles on the floor to the balcony, where the bedsheets had been formed into a rope to assist with the pirate's escape. And once again, Jack Sparrow had made an ass out of him! The man was positively incorrigible!
"Admiral, if you would give me a chance to explain-"
"Explain?! What is there to explain, Commodore? Are you going to explain to me how you let the man whom we have been searching for for months slip out of the house, right under your nose? Yes, Commodore, do explain. I would love to hear it!"
Will spoke to the positively livid man. "Pardon my intrusion, Admiral, but it was not the Commodore's fault. The King ordered that we leave the room while he bathed, and managed to escape in less than a few minutes."
The Admiral turned to Will. "Mr. Turner, that must be the poorest excuse I have ever heard. Now, I swear, if we do not find Sir Francis-"
Both Will and James silently blessed whoever knocked at the front door, interrupting Aston's diatribe. Norrington took the liberty of going to answer it, and was almost knocked off his feet with surprise when he opened the door.
There stood two soldiers, each holding an arm of the soaking wet form of Jack Sparrow. Said pirate was not only soaking wet, but wearing nothing but his overcoat and his skivvies.
"Sir," one of the soldiers addressed Norrington, "We found this pirate down at the docks-"
Before the lad could get out another word, the Commodore had grabbed Sparrow from them, yanked him inside the mansion, and slammed the door in the faces of the two bewildered soldiers.
Still holding firmly onto Jack's arm, Norrington proceeded to quickly lead him into the parlor where the rest of the group was waiting. As soon as the two entered, everyone in the room sighed in relief to see that the King had not run away. This, of course, was quickly followed by a gasp and a giggle from Elizabeth at Jack's appearance, as her father covered her eyes.
"No need to worry anymore," Norrington announced proudly. "It looks like our King has been found."
"'Ello, everyone!" Jack waved at them all, trying to lighten the tense mood of the room. "I see ye all missed ol' Jack."
The Commodore released Jack's arm, and could barely contain a slight laugh as he looked at the pirate's attire, or lack thereof. "Your Majesty, is there any particular reason why you decided to climb out a window, jump some fences, crawl through bushes, and run around through Port Royal wearing nothing but your overcoat and your undergarments?"
Jack grinned and put his hands up. "Pirate."
Well, that's it for chapter 7! Pretty long, eh? I hope you enjoyed it.
Tune in next time to see Jack get prettified! Uh oh. . .
Now, go click that little blue button and leave me a nice little review! I know you want to. . . and plus, all reviewers will get a Captain Jack Sparrow 18 inch talking action figure, which are due out in October! Wahoo I can't wait. Ta for now!