26 Cents Chapter 3: How Far?, a x-men: evolution fanfic

"How Far?"

Alright, I was planning on using My List by Toby Keith for this third part, but I was reluctant to write the chapter because Logan would've been so OOC for it. If you've ever heard the song, you probably see what I mean. I know that if I tried hard enough it wouldn't've been that bad, but I still wasn't too keen on it. Actually, I had fully intended on leaving it just those two chapters.

Then I saw the video for this song and I realized it was perfect for the third chapter! Now, not only would I not have two OOC Logan chapters one after the other, but with this song I realized I could actually say why Rogue left in the first place! So here we are now, and like the last bit this one is just after she left. And the emotions and thoughts are pretty much my own from when I found out about my own dirty, lying, three-timing sob. And this story is based on the fact that I haven't seen Cajun Spice what-so-ever.

Oh, and I got a job so you probably shouldn't be expecting anything new until I get my hours all sorted out and what not. Wow, summer's almost over and I barely got off the ground with my challenge that you may remember being mentioned back at the begining (or not).

Anyway-

Little Karma: Always a pleasure to hear from you again, Karma. And here's another... (sees she's out of cookies) umm... here's a cookie! (hands her a green gel pen) It's a gel pen cookie, they're all the rage! And slighty toxic! Great gifts for mortal enemies and annoying pets. Just... don't eat it yourself. Xx

me: You make me (the me me, not the you me) sooooo happy! ; ) But I'm out of cookies today so here, have a... (looks around) a rubber watch thing. Ooooh, it's red... Xx

Fiona12690 a.k.a. Roguey a.k.a. Rietro Lover a.k.a. Person of Many Names: I honestly hope you do go insane, insane reviewers are just so much fun! And here, have a... umm... oh! A pack of bubblegum! (thinks fast) Rietro-flavored bubblegum! ; )

Disclaimer: Whatever you recognize, I don't own. Whatever you don't recognize, I either own, or I don't and you just don't recognize it.

(26 Cents is by The Wilkonsons
I Can't Lie To Me is by Clay Davidson
How Far is by Martina McBride)

[song lyrics]
'her thoughts'
'everyone elses thoughts'
"speaking"

I don't honestly think a flashback thing is needed, but if it is just tell me and I'll fix it. And I don't know everyone she's ever absorbed, so let's just assume she absorbed some people onscreen and everyone else off.

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'It's your own fault anyway, ya know? It's not like you ever asked about it.'

'Give the gal some credit, it's not like it would've been easy to bring up.'

'Why the hell are you running? You can't run from your head, yo.'

'Where are you planning to go? If you'll just go home, I'm sure the proffesor can find you a place to stay for a while.'

'This is, like, insane! But you totally need it. Pretty soon, you'll, like, forget all about that creep!'

'So what are you gonna do, Stripes?'

'Shut up! Shut up!' The cry of mental anguish she screamed back at the voices quieted them for the moment. Unfortunetly this was a mixed blessing because now she could hear her own thoughts all too loudly.

What had made her do that to her? Easy, he was the self proclaimed King of Hearts. It was so easy to think that he cared for her though, he treated her like a princess and once she gave in to the feelings she really enjoyed being 'loved'. And just like she had feared the fairy tale had come to an end, but most definetly not the 'happily ever after' one she wanted. She could kill him for causing this. No she coudn't, but she really really wanted to believe she could. She just didn't know what she wanted anymore.

Fingering the quarter she had discovered earlier she was comforted by the fact that at least somebody out there loved her for real.

[There's a boat, I could sail away.
There's the sky, I could catch a plane.
There's a train, there's the tracks,
I could leave and I could choose to not come back.
Oh, never come back.]

The bus had pulled into a train station a few towns away when everyone aboard breathed a silent sigh of relief as the gothic mutant disembarked. They had all been giving her nervous looks and she eventually decided that she didn't have to put up with any of it anymore. On a train there'd still be paranoid glances, but at least there was more leg room.

The teller had given her a suspitious look when she asked how far a hundred and twenty-seven bucks could take her, but she got the ticket and waited out the rest of her time in the cold, nearly empty waiting room. Jepardy was on the mounted TV so she amused herself with making guesses, anything to keep her mind occupied.

"The mansion used in the 1995 film Billy Madison, was reused as a school for the gifted in this year 2000 blockbuster." (1)

'Harry Potter!'

'That-wasn't-a-mansion-Daniels,-that's-a-church.'

'Like, Ella Enchanted?'

'How do you freaks know this stuff, yo?'

'Aw, they're just guessin'.'

'Quiet down!' she ordered. She had no guess herself and wanted to see the answer. Unfortunetly an eight-year-old who had gotten away from his mother started playing with the channels. He prompty started whining about how the snow was hurting his ears.

'Nothing you can do about it,' Evan pointed out when she tried to switch the station back amidst the eager shrieks of the child who was ordering her to turn on Transformers. 'Trust me, only the personnel can change the channels.' Sure enough, nothing but static. She sat back down as far away as she could from the brat (who had gone into tantrum mode) and the annoying buzz of the set.

[There you are, giving up the fight.
Here I am, begging you to try.
Talk to me, let me in,
But you just put your wall back up again.
Oh, when's it gonna end?]

It really had been her own fault, when you really got down to it. Things had been going so well with Re- Gambit that she had forgotten to be on her guard. She had let her wall down and it cost her her heart in the long run.

She really should've known. He had always been so careful to keep his thoughts hidden from her, even going so far as avoiding her if she ever accidently absorbed any of the telepaths wandering around the house. She didn't know anything about his family or his past, and hell would freeze over before he came out and told her himself. Sure, she had tried to weasel things out of him before, but she respected his secrecy. Now she saw that maybe that hadn't been the best plan of action. But what could she say? Love makes you do stupid things. Like making you blind to what you knew the whole time.

They had been seeing each other for a while when he surprised her one day, taking her on a date to the local jewelery shops to look at engagment rings. They talked about spending their lives together and mock-planned their wedding. That second thing is what started his luck to be lost. He became a little distant, not much, but enough for the love of his life to notice. Then one day he told her he had to leave for a while, that he had some buisness to take care of at home with his family and Belladonna. The look on his face as he said that name read clearly that it was something he didn't mean to blurt out, and he left before she could ask who this Belladonna was.

He had been gone for a few days when Kitty suggested to just sift through his memories. Truthfully that had never even occured to her, she concidered it a breach of their trust. But as the days continued the curiousity nearly overwhelmed her, and she snuck a quick peek before he showed his face again. Belladonna, his fiancée by arranged marriage, called off. Well, she could live with that, right?

[How far do I have to go to make you understand?
I wanna make this work so much it hurts but I just can't
Keep on giving, go on living, with the way things are.]
So I'm gonna walk away,
And it's up to you to say,
How far.]

A train's number was called and she checked her ticket quickly. Finding it a match she grabbed her bag and headed out onto the platform. It had started to rain, and here she was without an umbrella. The kid and his mom where outside too, both wearing the yellow dollar store ponchos tourists usually keep handy. Where they on a trip alone? Did they have someone to go back to?

She showed the train guy her ticket and sqeezed herself and the duffle aboard, scanning the car quickly for a free seat. She couldn't help but be pleasently surprised when she found herself in the dome car (2). Getting a seat upstairs was easy since everyone on the train at this time of day were still off sleeping somewhere or in the dining car for breakfast. Her stomach reminded her loudly just how good breakfast sounded right about then.

'Yeah, eat up! Don't want you disappearing on us!'

Rolling her mental eyes at Freddy she dug around in her bag for some sandwiches.

[There's a chance, I could change my mind.
But I wont, not 'til you decide.
What you want, what you need,
Do you even care if I stay or leave?
Oh, what's it gonna be?]

Remy the Lover. Gawd, even his name mocked her. Sure, beau translates directly into handsome, but the English (or at least the Old English) generally used the term for their loves. And either way it still stings.

'Your mind wanders when you're hungry,' Freddy pointed out, snapping her effectivly back to reality. Silently agreeing she took another nibble of roast beef on cold toast to appease the one of few helpful extra minds she was stuck with.

'Freddy, do you think Ah should've left?'

'I know you should've. Bite.' She obliged.

'But don't ya think-'

'It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. I know that's a hard concept to get what with so many voices up here, but it's all about you. And really? I would've done the same thing. Bite.' She did. 'The meat is like rubber, who cooked it?'

'Ah did.' Freddy was silenced despite assurences that the comment wasn't taken personally.

Freddy was always the most helpful voice upstairs. But he was wrong in one sense. It did matter what someone else thought because it was that person who was driving her on.

She had to wonder, 'Will he even care when he finds out Ah'm gone?'

When he finally came home from his trip she had come out and told him she knew who Belladonna was, since she felt a little guilty for it. That's when she learned why what he was about to tell her was called 'dropping the bomb'.

"Remy's sorry, petite, but dis just ain't gonna work."

The third person made him sound so detached, it made him sound as though they had only been seeing each other a few days instead of the few months. What had happened that drove him away from her? He wasn't telling, only offering excuses, and she had to know. She reached up and touched his face, and he unwittingly told her everything she didn't want to hear. The wedding with the Southern Snake was back on, no choice in the matter, he went along willingly. She seached for something to tell her there was another explination, but that was all there was. Betrayal. Willing betrayal.

Without waiting for him to wake up she rushed out the door and retreated to the BoM shelter. Treating her like a long lost friend the watched her for the night and she went back to the mansion in the morning. He offered appologies, of course, but she just shrugged them off, cold as ever.

"You do wha'chu gotta."

It was three days before it sunk in. It was three days before she found herself in a park in the pouring rain, crying her eyes out with Ororo and an umbrella on one side and Lance wrapping his jacket over her shoulders on the other. (3)

[Out of this chair, or just across the room?]

His door was open when she left and he was tossing a litle in his sleep, so she padded to his side and kissed his forehead, to both knock him into a dreamless slumber and wish him goodbye.

[Halfway down the block, or halfway to the moon?]

And here she was now, on a train to the moon. (4)

She would go to the stars if it meant she could forget about the way he made her feel. The times he'd promise to never leave her. The time he left.

And until he left her mind body and soul she'd keep going to the ends of the earth.

[Yeah I'm gonna walk away,
And it's up to you to say,
How far.]

'How far is far enough, Rem? It's all up to you.'

[How far?]

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I'm actually pretty proud of this one so I'm hoping to get some good reviews with it. I think it may be because I wrote it in the daytime instead of the red-eye hours, but anyway. I know I probably screwed over what little of an accent I did give them, but I figured I'd keep it light enough so I'd sound the least like a dolt as possible.

(1) The answer is, naturally, "What is X-Men?"

(2) Not sure if this is the wrong name or just a Canadian thing or what, but basically I mean those cars with two floors and a glass/plexiglass ceiling.

(3) yeah, part of the longer story I may have mentioned in the first chapter

(4) metaphorically, of course