Chapter 6
What Happens
"...I admit that I acted like a total asshole to you and I'm sorry and I think I kinda love you maybe."
"Awww...that's the nicest thing you ever said to me! No wait, I think that's the nicest thing you've ever said to anybody!"
"Yeah...just don't say anything to the guys about it. They'll think I'm a pussy." Cartman said looking down, blushing.
"Cartman?"
"What."
"Have you ever...kissed anybody?" Megan wasn't sure why she brought up the subject...it just kind of came out. She got embarrassed right away.
"Well...I got kissed once. But it was kind of out of nowhere. I'll tell you if you promise not to be mad at me cuz it wasn't my fault."
"Okay, who?"
"Wendy."
"No way! You're shitting me."
"No I'm not she used to be like, totally hot for me." Cartman said with a smug smile on his face.
"Yuck! Well I mean, not you...Wendy."
"She's actually okay once you get used to her."
"Yeah I know...she and I aren't on each other's good side right now though."
"So...um...have you ever kissed anybody!" Cartman asked nervously.
"...No. Do you...want to try it?"
"Umm yeah ok."
They lean in...
"Close your eyes it's freaking me out."
They lean in again and give each other a quick peck on the lips. Megan goes crazy, squeals, and gets up and jumps around. Cartman just kinda looks confusedly at Megan.
"What the hell are you doing."
"Ohh...sorry I'm just...ooh!...you kissed me! eek!!!"
Cartman rolled his eyes and said to himself, "It must be a girl thing or something."
She jumps onto her bed and lands on her back and sighs happily.
"What the hell's your problem?"
"You wouldn't understand cuz you're a guy." she said, staring at the ceiling.
At school the next day Cartman and Megan were obviously together again. This was the first time throughout the whole week that they weren't screaming at each other and it made everyone happy. Except for Wendy of course but nobody cares about her anyway. And just like any guy with great news about something that happened with a girl, Cartman didn't miss the chance to brag about it to his friends when he had the chance. Megan was off somewhere and they were all in the hall before lunch when Cartman told Stan, Kyle, and Kenny.
"You guys will never believe what happened last night." Cartman said quietly.
"Do we even want to know?" asked Kyle.
"Shut up, you freakin Jew! Now before I was rudely interrupted...I was just about to say that Megan kissed me."
"...So?" Kenny said. He figured Cartman didn't know what the hell to do like before when Wendy kissed him and he just standed there like a goon.
"I kissed her back."
"No way." Stan said.
"I did! Seriously!" Cartman said, "You guys are just jealous because not only is my girlfriend really hot she's also the sweetest, nicest, most perfect girl in the world and you are all jealous cuz she's MY girlfriend. Well you guys can all suck my balls."
"No thanks...we'll leave that to your girlfriend!" Kenny said, being a little pottymouth as always. And of course Stan and Kyle laughed uncontrollably.
"Kenny, you're a sick minded little pervert and a poor little piece of shit and I hate you!"
"Fuck you!"
Just as Cartman was about to beat the shit out of Kenny, Megan showed up and held him back.
"Megan, let me beat him up! I gotta beat the crap out of him for what he said about you!"
"What did he say?"
"Cartman said for me to suck his balls and I said I'd just leave that to you...?" Kenny said in a meek voice. Megan's moods were so unpredictable.
"...You got mad about that?" Megan said, confused.
"Yeah...cuz no one talks to you like that without getting the shit beat out of them!"
"Cartman...you don't have to stick up for me every single time something like this happens. I can handle it myself. You missed my big fight with Wendy...I handled it okay without you there. Just relax, dude. So...the dance is tomorrow night, do you wanna be my date?"
"Hell yeah I do!"
"Come on let's go to lunch, I'll give you my pudding."
"YES!"
"So you guys are going, right?" Megan said, "To the dance?"
"Yeah...we're not gonna have any fun though cuz we couldn't get chicks." Kyle said, pushing around the food on his plate.
"Ha ha! You guys are such losers," Cartman of course had to once again rub the fact that he had a girlfriend and they didn't.
"Shut up, Cartman!" Megan said.
"Hey bitch don't tell me to shut up!"
No one looked suprise about their exchange of words in the least bit. This was normal between the two of them, and they never meant anything by it.
Wendy walked over to where they all were sitting and jumped up and sat between Megan and Cartman.
"I just wanted to tell you that I'll meet you by the door tomorrow at the dance, Cartman. Oh and about my corsage. Can you make sure you get a yellow one? Preferably a rose? I don't just want any old cheap corsage either. I want a nice one."
"Fuck you bitch I'm going with Megan."
"WHAT? You can't just blow me off!"
"I just did, ho. Now leave before Stan pukes."
"Hi, Stan..." Wendy said.
Stan spewed everywhere.
"Oh no, my shoes!" Wendy cried.
"Now can you please just go?" Cartman said.
Wendy left, glaring evilly at Megan beforehand, and walked dramatically away.
"Stupid bitch," Megan muttered.