Disclaimer: I do not own LOTR, or any of its characters. Legolas: What's with this story? One minute we're doing the tonsil tango, and the next we're screaming bloody murder at each other! Make up your mind!" Me: My entire existence serves just one purpose - to make you insane. Legolas: You're doing a bang up job of it, so far. Me: Hee, hee.
Chapter 9Some Like It Hot
I reached my room in record time, since everyone in my path who saw the expression on my face gave me a wide berth. Even Adranial took two steps back when I blew into the room, slamming the door behind me.
"Milady...whatever is wrong?" she asked warily, making sure to keep several feet of space between us.
"Nothing! Everthing!" I cried, standing in the middle of the room, sputtering, with my hands clenched at my side. "I just need to be alone for a while."
"As you wish, Milady..." Adranial curtsied, and swiftly left the room, closing the door softly behind her.
Alone at last, the anger I had felt drained out, replaced by an overwhelming bleakness. I leaned against the wall, slowing sliding down to sit in a heap on the cold stone floor. Hugging my knees, the tears came at last, sobs wrenching my chest.
I didn't understand why I was crying. I should be angry, like I was just a few moments ago. I should be throwing things around the room, destroying everything within reach. I should be screaming at the top of my lungs for Manwe - cursing him, cursing Legolas, cursing everything and everyone in this misbegotten world. Instead, here I was, reduced to a weepy pile of hormones, blubbering into my skirt.
It occurred to my that perhaps I had blown the best thing that had ever happened to me. It also occurred to me that I no longer seemed to have any control over my life. It also occurred to my that I was completely alone in this place, without any resources, home, or kin. I was a pauper.
Eventually, the sobs subsided to erratic hiccups, though the tears still streamed down my face to drip off my chin onto my skirt.
An insistent knocking sounded at the door. I ignored it, not wanting to see or speak to anyone ever again. I just wanted to stay curled on the floor until I died. Which would be shortly from dehydration if the tears didn't stop soon.
The knocking continued, becoming louder. "GO AWAY!" I yelled, finally annoyed enough to find my voice.
My head was buried in my skirt, but I heard the door open and someone step into the room. "I said to go away. Please just leave me alone!" my skirt-muffled voice said.
"Hmmm. I don't believe that it is customary for a guest to order the King from a room in his own house..."
"Oh, no...not his father!" I thought to myself, wondering what the penalty was for calling the son of the King a "perverted ass."
I felt a finger lift my chin from my skirt. Looking up, I found myself staring into the eyes of King Thranduil. The eyes that looked back at me were filled with compassion, and a touch of humor.
"Surely you're not going to let him get away with this, are you?" He asked with a half smile. "I had the impression that you were stronger than that."
"Your Majesty...he...I..." Helpless to stop them, the tears continued to slide down my cheeks. I wiped my eyes with the back of my sleeve, and sniffed loudly. "I don't belong here..."
Thranduil handed me a large square of silk, which I used to blow my nose. Like a trumpet.
"Sitting here crying will not solve anything, you know. I understand that you are, er...stranded here in Mirkwood, through no fault of your own. Therefore, it is my decree that you be given residency. My house is now your house, until such time, if any, that you no longer require it.
"Know this, Lady Emmess...my son often thinks only with his heart, instead of his head. I feel certain that he meant no harm in his plea to Manwe. Still, this is no excuse for either Manwe's actions, or Legolas' since you arrived. He should have been truthful with you from the start. As King, and as Legolas' father, I tell you that you are in no way bound to him. You are free to make your own decisions, and your own choices. Now, wash your face, and come downstairs...the party continues! And that, my dear Lady Emmess, is the order of the King!"
He helped me to stand, smiled again, and left the room. I thought to myself that things could have gone much worse. I was very lucky that the King happened to be such a nice man, er...Elf.
I went to the basin in the bathroom, and splashed cold water on my face. Sitting at the dressing table, I looked into the reflecting glass, searching for some sign of Manwe, but he was not to found. "Big shocker, there," I thought. "Coward!" I yelled at the mirror.
As I sat staring at my reflection through my puffy, bloodshot eyes, the anger began to return. King Thranduil was right. I absolutely could NOT let Legolas get away with ruining my life. I also could NOT, under any circumstances, let he and Manwe make life-altering decisions for me. Wife, indeed! I was the only master of my destiny, and I was the only one who would decide when, if, and who I would marry. Firming my resolve, I decided that I was going to 'pretty up,' march downstairs, and flirt with everything in pants.
A short while later, I checked my reflection again. The eyes were back to normal, and I practiced batting them a few times. Flirting was never my strong suit, but I supposed I would pass muster. It also helped that I had loosened the back ties on my dress, freeing the girls to bounce a bit more. Hey, if ya got 'em, flaunt 'em. At least when it serves your purpose.
I paused at the head of the stairs, looking down at the Great Hall, seeking my first victim. Ah...there - that pair of tall, dark haired Elves standing near the punch bowl. A two-fer! Excellent...
I descended the stairs with what I hoped was regal bearing, and sashayed - yes, I actually sashayed - over to where the two Elves were standing, dipping their cups into the punch.
"Hi," I said, in what I had hoped would be a smoky, husky voice. To my ears, I sounded like a frog. I winced, cleared my throat, and tried again. "Hi, I'm Emmess," I said, beaming a bright smile.
The Elves turned to look at me. They were twins! Identical twins! How fun. Identical slow smiles crept onto their identical, handsome faces. Their gray eyes sparkled as they looked at me. Or rather, as they looked at my twins.
"Lady Emmess," said one twin, taking my hand and brushing his lips against it, "I am Elrohir. This is my brother Elladan. We are the sons of Elrond of Rivendell...it is a pleasure to meet you."
Ellandan, took my other hand and brought it to his lips. Neither twin relinquished their hold on my hands after sufficiently slobbering on them.
"Perhaps one of you charming gentlemen would be so kind as to get me a glass of punch?" I asked, batting my eyes like crazy.
"Do you have something in your eye?" Elrohir asked, looked at me askance. "Perhaps I should fetch our father...he is a healer."
"No!" I answered quickly. Two Elves I could handle, but three? All in the same family? That sounded way too weird, even for me. I made a mental note to stop batting the damn eyes. I must have looked like I was having a seizure. "I'm fine, now. Really....about that punch...?"
"Immediately, Milady," Elladan said, finally dropping my hand and turning to the punch. He handed me a glass, brimming with a dark red liquid.
"I was told by Ada...my father...that it was Legolas who brought you here this evening, and yet I do not see him. Should I have been your escort, I would not have left your side for an instant!" Elrohir stated, smiling a very charming smile.
"Legolas can go jump in a lake, as far as I'm concerned," I replied, doing the hair flip thing. "I speak to whom I please, and it pleases me to be speaking to the two of you, right now."
The twins exchanged a look, whose meaning was not lost on me at all. Their identical smiles grew into grins. I took a sip of the punch, and found it to be exceedingly strong. My face must have shown my surprise, because the brothers laughed.
"We thought the punch was rather drab...so we...um...enhanced it!" Elladan laughed, showing me a small brown bottle hidden in his waistcoat.
I laughed along, privately thinking that I had picked two winners.
"Tell me of Rivendell, " I asked, arching my back a bit. "I have never been there, but I have been told by Aragorn that it is magnificent."
"I will tell you as we dance, if you will do me the honor," Elrohir answered, holding out his arm. I saw a frown fleet across Elladan's face as his brother beat him to the punch.
"I would love to dance, though I fear I may step on your toes," I softly giggled, arching a bit more. "If Elladan will agree to partner me for the next song...?"
"Aye," Elladan said, grinning once again.
Elrohir led me to the dance floor, where he proceeded to sweep me around and around in a whirling dervish. It may have been that the punch was even stronger than I had thought, because the small amount I had drunk was having a definite effect. I was starting to sweat like a sumo wrestler.
"Oh, my stars!" I exclaimed, trying to remain Lady-like, "Does it seem rather warm in here?"
"Would you care for some fresh air, Lady Emmess?" Elrohir asked. "There is a garden just outside that you might like..."
Drunk as I was, I remembered what had happened the last time I was in that garden.
"No...I'm sure I'll be just fine..." I murmured, giving him a smile. I thought to myself that he was, indeed, a handsome Elf...and so was his brother, obviously. They were twins. Two peas in a pod. Two good to be true. Two Towers...ooops. I realized fleetingly that I was hammered.
I barely remember the rest of the conversation, and I don't remember dancing with Elladan at all. The next thing I do remember was sitting in a chair near the wall of the room, with three dark haired Elves bending over me.
"What did you two put in the punch?" asked the elder of the three.
"Ada...it was only a few drops of Elvenmead..."
"Oi! I should have known better than to let the two of you out of my sight! This poor child is completely wasted! You should know that those of Men cannot consume Elvenmead without dire consequences. She is going to be a very sorry, hurting young woman tomorrow, and it is all your fault."
"We'll put her to bed, Ada..."
"Do I look stupid to you? You will not go anywhere near her room this night!" Elrond hissed. "I'll put her to bed myself. You two had better say your farewells...I'm sending you back to Rivendell first thing in the morning!"
A pair of intense blue eyes watched the entire scene unfold from a dark corner of the room.
"So, ye have taken to lurking in shadows now, Laddie," Gimli asked from behind Legolas.
"I...um...just didn't feel like dancing just yet," Legolas replied, embarrassed at being caught spying. It had been his plan to flirt and woo whichever Elleth he met first, but he had been frozen when he saw Emmess approach Elrond's twins. Jealously had kept him rooted to the spot, watching her dance with someone other than himself.
"I should wring both their necks...letting her drink Elvenmead..."
"Ye know those two...they never stop to think before they pull one of their pranks!" Gimli laughed. "She'll be alright. A little headache in the morning, that's all."
"Little? The last time Aragorn drank Elvenmead he was unconscious for three days! When he finally woke, he asked me to put an arrow through him and end his misery."
"Well, perhaps you can end HER misery when she wakes..." Gimli chuckled, "and I don't mean the misery caused by the mead!"
Legolas glared at him. "If you are saying that I should go crawling back to her and apologize, you're daft, Dwarf!"
"I mean that it may be your opportunity to get back on her good side by being there to help her when she needs it, you pointy eared blockhead!" Gimli said, giving Legolas a shove.
"Not a chance. She got herself into this mess...she can bloody well suffer her way out! It's her own fault for sidling up to those two!" he shouted, stalking away.
Gimli shook his head, and watched his friend stamp off toward the punchbowl. Turning, he caught sight of Elrond carrying Emmess up the stairs to her room.