CHAPTER SIX - The Warmth of Addiction
He didn't have to open his eyes to see the form pass in front of the window. It moved silent and quick, not like Frank or a harlot, but someone sneaking. He laid quiet, not changing the rhythm of his breathing as he stole a glance through his eyelashes, only seeing a dark form, but now in a honed position, its back to him.
Moving silently, he let his hand slide out from beneath the side of the blankets that had gone to disarray around him.
The floorboards creaked softly and he heard the form stop dead as Frank sighed and hitched his light snoring from the other bed for a minute, before rolling over and resuming.
Jesse, watching as the form continued its steps over to the bureau against the wall, fully extended his hand and felt the cool touch of his rolled belt on the table beside him. Working his fingers gently, and ignoring the pain in his shoulders, he pulled on the leather, feeling the wait of the Colt's slide across, helped to be silent by the doily underneath them.
The dark figure was at the bureau now, picking up the pictures, their back still turned to him.
Like lightening, Jesse pulled hard at his belt and caught one of his revolvers by the butt, while the rest of his belt fell to the floor. At the clatter, the figure turned and Jesse's Colt barrel was right there, pressed at the point right between the figure's eyes.
As he looked at the figure with open eyes, Jesse noticed the pheasant feather tucked into the red band on the black derby hat he wore. The face of the figure had smooth, tanned skin. A shock of streaked brown hair stuck out in points around the edge of the hat.
It was a boy.
His hands were clutched against his chest and shaking and sweat had begun to break out across his smooth forehead and upper lip, not even old enough to be shaded with whiskers.
Jesse could feel his arms immediately become weak as he raised his other hand in compensation, twinging at the sore muscles.
"Jesse?" He chanced a look over to where Frank had his rifle leveled at the middle of the boy's back, his eyes jumping between Jesse's face and the sights on the gun.
Jesse paused for a moment before putting out his hands towards Frank, who lowered his rifle.
"What are you doing in here kid?" Jesse asked, pulling back the barrel of the gun from the boy's head, but not lowering it from the boy's vision for a moment longer.
The boy opened his mouth to speak, but no sound came out. His bottom lip trembled as his eyes fell to the ground and reached up to shake off his hat and run the rim of it through his fingers.
Jesse stooped to get his face into the boy's line of vision, and put a hand out on the boy's shoulder, feeling him almost collapse beneath it.
"Can you talk?" A smile broke out across Jesse's face as the boy caught his eyes, nodding his head quickly, his nervousness causing humor. He looked to Frank, who had moved over towards the boy, standing behind him with his thumbs hooked into the sides of his belt. His tall frame dwarfing the little kid who glanced nervously at him before shrinking.
"What's your name?" Jesse asked, catching the boy's eyes again.
"J-J-Jesiah..." His stuttering whisper was barely heard.
"Jesiah?"
The boy nodded.
"How old are you?" Frank stooped down next to the boy, exchanging an amused look at Jesse.
The boy licked his lips as the nervousness somewhat dissipated between him and the two men.
"Fourt-t-een..."
Jesse lowered his gun completely to the side of the bed, taking his hand off the boy's cold, bony shoulder.
"You want to do something for me?" Jesse asked and the boy nodded, a white-toothed smile breaking the tan skin on the lower part of his angular face.
"Do you know who Cole Younger is?" The boy nodded again.
"Go tell him to clear all the people out downstairs," With his head still bobbing, he put thumbed on his hat and turned for the door without a hesitating question.
Frank looked at Jesse as the boy went out the door, and Jesse reached up to grab at his shoulder that ached, feeling the bandaging.
"I've been up here for what? Six weeks? I'm done lying on my back..." Reaching over, he grabbed his folded shirt and tried to put it on, pausing every so often.
Frank stood up, his knees popping, "I don't think it's a good idea."
"I've laid on my back enough for my own death, Frank, I'm sick of it."
Frank sighed and went back to his bed, grabbing his boots and pulling them on, his blond hair tussled. As he sat was watched Jesse struggle with his clothes.
As he tried to get up and push himself out from the bed, his knees buckled, and he caught himself against the bedside table. Frank was up and coming towards him. "Jesse..." he warned, but Jesse just smiled.
"It's fine, I'm just weak..." He made another stab at trying to walk on his own and his legs buckled again, Frank catching him. Jesse laughed and put his head against Frank's chest.
There was a long pause between them, exchanging thoughts without ever having to speak.
"I can carry you..." Frank looked down as Jesse lifted his head, thinking over it.
"...alright..." he felt even weaker now, having his brother carry him, but he also knew that it was the only way in hell he'd get down the stairs. Pulling at the back of his knees, Frank gathered Jesse into his arms and twisted up so that he was standing, heading towards the door.
~
"Go on! All a'ya! Git the hell outta here ya maggots!" He kicked and shooed them away with his hat, clearing out the bar and the sea of people.
Cole was up on the bar top, feet planted between bottles and glasses of liquor with his arms in the direction of the doorway, posing as a human sign. Clell and Comanche Tom were smiling from the corner, sitting with their feet up on the card table with their hands in their laps.
When one of the brothel girls began to go by, caught in the swarm of the moving mass, Cole made a dive.
"Oh no you don't!" Swooping down, he grabbed the girl up by her forcedly petite waist and pulled her onto the bar top, kissing her. She giggled a silly little giggle and fell all over him, her hands at his hips as she watched the people force their bodies out the door and into the dusty streets of Cattletongue.
When the last of them had cleared out Jesiah closed the door triumphantly behind them, his green eyes scanning over the now almost empty room. Only the large-bellied bar keep, Cole and the girl, Clell, and Comanche Tom remained.
All their heads turned up towards the door of Jesse's room as if they were all on strings, Bob coming to the bottom of the stairs as Frank began down them with Jesse in his arms.
"Feels like our wedding day, doesn't it?" Frank smiled and Jesse's eyebrows cocked as he smiled.
"I'm gonna shoot you..."
"Well look what we got here!" They both turned towards Bob who had his hat off and was bowing. "If it ain't the protocol returner!"
"You look even shittier 'en when we brought you in here." Cole broke in from the counter top, in the midst of helping the harlot in pink off the bar, who giggled furiously.
As they reached the bottom of the stairs, Comanche Tom appeared from around the corner, putting out his arms to help Frank as he shifted Jesse down onto his feet.
They both took one of Jesse's biceps and helped him towards the bar.
"Yeah, well, you look shittier than I ever will." Jesse flashed a smile at Cole's open jaw, playing shock. Then his bottom lip went out and he wiped an invisible tear with his thumb, shaking his shoulders like he was crying.
"There, there sweet lady," Bob consoled him in a mawkish, accented voice. "I still love you..."
He cocked his eyebrows coyly, licking both his thumbs and passing them over the tops of his eyebrows backwards, ruffling them. "Shall we?" He stuck out his arm, crooked to slip a hand inside, and cocked his knees into a European improvident walk.
Smiling widely along with the game, Cole took his arm and they trotted like they were headed for the door, but split apart and curved back towards the bar where everyone else was gathered and smiling.
"Makes you think about pretty Sadie from Atlanta, don't it?" Jesse asked, "I miss her..."
Cole's face dropped as he came forward, taking on a humor-hewed seriousness.
"I miss her mustache more..." Frank added as Cole reached for Jesse, locking his arm around his head.
"You talk about Sadie again and I'll give you the beating of your life little Jesse James."
"Let 'im go Cole," Frank said, pushing Cole off of Jesse. Cole stumbled for a stance before turning like Frank had just crossed a line, anger tingeing his shaded face.
Frank immediately stood from his stool beside Jesse, while Bob took a seat on the opposite one, watching with a sullen face.
"Cole..." Frank said putting up his hands in protest, while Cole brought up his hands in fists. He made like he was going to punch Frank right square in the nose, but instead grabbed the sides of his head, giving him a big wet kiss right on the lips.
Frank reeled back as Cole stumbled away, laughing too damn hard to stand up straight. The other men laughed from their seats at Frank's reaction.
He wiped at his mouth with the back of his hand before wiping it on his pants, mad, but not mad enough to cover the smile on his face. And as Cole stumbled away, he kicked him in the butt, before returning to his seat, shaking his head in disbelief.
After righting himself, Cole took a seat next to Bob, pulling the girl in pink into his lap; Clell, Tom, and Jesiah taking up the remaining stools.
Frank raised his hand to the keep who brought him a beer and he took a long, deep drink, trying to clean out the taste.
As the large room quieted and smiles faded, Cole tapped his finger against the counter top, hunched over as he turned. The girl lolled against his chest, pulling at his hair and twisting it in her fingers.
"So what happened Jesse?" In all seriousness, "how'd they get you?" He batted the girl's hand away and she pouted before moving down to play with the buttons on his shirt, unbuttoning one and sliding her hands in against his chest.
Jesse leaned back as the keep brought him a beer and he looked at it for while, but never bent to take a drink. "I don't remember, I just kind of - all I remember is bein' on this horse an' this old man with a cross branded across his eye had Zee..." his voice faded at her name, some memories of her flooding his mind. "They burned her...and I couldn't do anything..."
He reached up to scratch the nape of his neck, then rubbed at his hair, feeling the rough skin that was now a healed rope burn. "Then they hung me, and that's it." He shrugged, trying to shift the heaviness in his shoulders. "I woke up here and that's it, that's all I remember."
Clell, who had reached into his pocket, drew out a piece of blackened metal, reached across the counter to put it in front of Jesse. "We found this, when we found you. We figured you'd want it."
Pausing, he reached down and picked it up, smoothing his thumb over the roughened pendant, the chain hanging black and leaving black dust across his hand as he moved it. It was the necklace Zee had been wearing.
Jesse bent down and kissed it, cupping it against his lips with his eyes closed, before putting it around his neck, tucking it into his shirt. Then he reached for his beer and took a hard swallow, trying to wash all the memories away again.
Frank cleared his throat loudly, even though it probably wouldn't have been so loud had the room not been so quiet. Jesse tapped his fingers against his bottle, staring at it. "So what have you been doing?"
And they all sat back with relief.
"Recruiting mostly," Cole said, taking a swig, "damn near everyone in the south is tryin' to get in with us. It's all cause of you Jesse," he looked up towards Jesse and they met eyes. "They all want to be part of the James Gang."
Jesse smiled but discarded it, "It's the Younger Gang now and you know it, I'm not in it anymore."
Frank glanced at Jesiah, whose face fell to the countertop at the comment.
"Aw, come on Jesse," Bob said, leaning back to look at him across the backs of the others. "You were the only one that could think up all the plans! Cole's horrible at it." That earned a slap across the back of the head from his brother, and a smile from Jesse.
"Don't you forget brother, I let you say "let's ride"." Cole warned and Bob came back at it with a sneering look. "I still suck at it."
"You suck at a lot of things..." Cole challenged and Bob made a move to get up.
"Boys," Frank warned and they both sank back down.
"We just need you on this last one, Jesse," Clell piped up, leaning over the counter. "Then it'll all be over, we swear."
Cole and Bob nodded in agreement. Jesse ran his hand over the stubble on his chin.
"Now boys, you know Jesse can't do anymore robberies for a while. Doctor's orders."
Jesse rubbed at his eye, watching Frank smile as his own hand rifted through his blond whiskers, breaking around his mouth.
"Frank," Jesse canted his head towards him, his black eyebrows cocked. "When have I ever listened to orders?"
He didn't have to open his eyes to see the form pass in front of the window. It moved silent and quick, not like Frank or a harlot, but someone sneaking. He laid quiet, not changing the rhythm of his breathing as he stole a glance through his eyelashes, only seeing a dark form, but now in a honed position, its back to him.
Moving silently, he let his hand slide out from beneath the side of the blankets that had gone to disarray around him.
The floorboards creaked softly and he heard the form stop dead as Frank sighed and hitched his light snoring from the other bed for a minute, before rolling over and resuming.
Jesse, watching as the form continued its steps over to the bureau against the wall, fully extended his hand and felt the cool touch of his rolled belt on the table beside him. Working his fingers gently, and ignoring the pain in his shoulders, he pulled on the leather, feeling the wait of the Colt's slide across, helped to be silent by the doily underneath them.
The dark figure was at the bureau now, picking up the pictures, their back still turned to him.
Like lightening, Jesse pulled hard at his belt and caught one of his revolvers by the butt, while the rest of his belt fell to the floor. At the clatter, the figure turned and Jesse's Colt barrel was right there, pressed at the point right between the figure's eyes.
As he looked at the figure with open eyes, Jesse noticed the pheasant feather tucked into the red band on the black derby hat he wore. The face of the figure had smooth, tanned skin. A shock of streaked brown hair stuck out in points around the edge of the hat.
It was a boy.
His hands were clutched against his chest and shaking and sweat had begun to break out across his smooth forehead and upper lip, not even old enough to be shaded with whiskers.
Jesse could feel his arms immediately become weak as he raised his other hand in compensation, twinging at the sore muscles.
"Jesse?" He chanced a look over to where Frank had his rifle leveled at the middle of the boy's back, his eyes jumping between Jesse's face and the sights on the gun.
Jesse paused for a moment before putting out his hands towards Frank, who lowered his rifle.
"What are you doing in here kid?" Jesse asked, pulling back the barrel of the gun from the boy's head, but not lowering it from the boy's vision for a moment longer.
The boy opened his mouth to speak, but no sound came out. His bottom lip trembled as his eyes fell to the ground and reached up to shake off his hat and run the rim of it through his fingers.
Jesse stooped to get his face into the boy's line of vision, and put a hand out on the boy's shoulder, feeling him almost collapse beneath it.
"Can you talk?" A smile broke out across Jesse's face as the boy caught his eyes, nodding his head quickly, his nervousness causing humor. He looked to Frank, who had moved over towards the boy, standing behind him with his thumbs hooked into the sides of his belt. His tall frame dwarfing the little kid who glanced nervously at him before shrinking.
"What's your name?" Jesse asked, catching the boy's eyes again.
"J-J-Jesiah..." His stuttering whisper was barely heard.
"Jesiah?"
The boy nodded.
"How old are you?" Frank stooped down next to the boy, exchanging an amused look at Jesse.
The boy licked his lips as the nervousness somewhat dissipated between him and the two men.
"Fourt-t-een..."
Jesse lowered his gun completely to the side of the bed, taking his hand off the boy's cold, bony shoulder.
"You want to do something for me?" Jesse asked and the boy nodded, a white-toothed smile breaking the tan skin on the lower part of his angular face.
"Do you know who Cole Younger is?" The boy nodded again.
"Go tell him to clear all the people out downstairs," With his head still bobbing, he put thumbed on his hat and turned for the door without a hesitating question.
Frank looked at Jesse as the boy went out the door, and Jesse reached up to grab at his shoulder that ached, feeling the bandaging.
"I've been up here for what? Six weeks? I'm done lying on my back..." Reaching over, he grabbed his folded shirt and tried to put it on, pausing every so often.
Frank stood up, his knees popping, "I don't think it's a good idea."
"I've laid on my back enough for my own death, Frank, I'm sick of it."
Frank sighed and went back to his bed, grabbing his boots and pulling them on, his blond hair tussled. As he sat was watched Jesse struggle with his clothes.
As he tried to get up and push himself out from the bed, his knees buckled, and he caught himself against the bedside table. Frank was up and coming towards him. "Jesse..." he warned, but Jesse just smiled.
"It's fine, I'm just weak..." He made another stab at trying to walk on his own and his legs buckled again, Frank catching him. Jesse laughed and put his head against Frank's chest.
There was a long pause between them, exchanging thoughts without ever having to speak.
"I can carry you..." Frank looked down as Jesse lifted his head, thinking over it.
"...alright..." he felt even weaker now, having his brother carry him, but he also knew that it was the only way in hell he'd get down the stairs. Pulling at the back of his knees, Frank gathered Jesse into his arms and twisted up so that he was standing, heading towards the door.
~
"Go on! All a'ya! Git the hell outta here ya maggots!" He kicked and shooed them away with his hat, clearing out the bar and the sea of people.
Cole was up on the bar top, feet planted between bottles and glasses of liquor with his arms in the direction of the doorway, posing as a human sign. Clell and Comanche Tom were smiling from the corner, sitting with their feet up on the card table with their hands in their laps.
When one of the brothel girls began to go by, caught in the swarm of the moving mass, Cole made a dive.
"Oh no you don't!" Swooping down, he grabbed the girl up by her forcedly petite waist and pulled her onto the bar top, kissing her. She giggled a silly little giggle and fell all over him, her hands at his hips as she watched the people force their bodies out the door and into the dusty streets of Cattletongue.
When the last of them had cleared out Jesiah closed the door triumphantly behind them, his green eyes scanning over the now almost empty room. Only the large-bellied bar keep, Cole and the girl, Clell, and Comanche Tom remained.
All their heads turned up towards the door of Jesse's room as if they were all on strings, Bob coming to the bottom of the stairs as Frank began down them with Jesse in his arms.
"Feels like our wedding day, doesn't it?" Frank smiled and Jesse's eyebrows cocked as he smiled.
"I'm gonna shoot you..."
"Well look what we got here!" They both turned towards Bob who had his hat off and was bowing. "If it ain't the protocol returner!"
"You look even shittier 'en when we brought you in here." Cole broke in from the counter top, in the midst of helping the harlot in pink off the bar, who giggled furiously.
As they reached the bottom of the stairs, Comanche Tom appeared from around the corner, putting out his arms to help Frank as he shifted Jesse down onto his feet.
They both took one of Jesse's biceps and helped him towards the bar.
"Yeah, well, you look shittier than I ever will." Jesse flashed a smile at Cole's open jaw, playing shock. Then his bottom lip went out and he wiped an invisible tear with his thumb, shaking his shoulders like he was crying.
"There, there sweet lady," Bob consoled him in a mawkish, accented voice. "I still love you..."
He cocked his eyebrows coyly, licking both his thumbs and passing them over the tops of his eyebrows backwards, ruffling them. "Shall we?" He stuck out his arm, crooked to slip a hand inside, and cocked his knees into a European improvident walk.
Smiling widely along with the game, Cole took his arm and they trotted like they were headed for the door, but split apart and curved back towards the bar where everyone else was gathered and smiling.
"Makes you think about pretty Sadie from Atlanta, don't it?" Jesse asked, "I miss her..."
Cole's face dropped as he came forward, taking on a humor-hewed seriousness.
"I miss her mustache more..." Frank added as Cole reached for Jesse, locking his arm around his head.
"You talk about Sadie again and I'll give you the beating of your life little Jesse James."
"Let 'im go Cole," Frank said, pushing Cole off of Jesse. Cole stumbled for a stance before turning like Frank had just crossed a line, anger tingeing his shaded face.
Frank immediately stood from his stool beside Jesse, while Bob took a seat on the opposite one, watching with a sullen face.
"Cole..." Frank said putting up his hands in protest, while Cole brought up his hands in fists. He made like he was going to punch Frank right square in the nose, but instead grabbed the sides of his head, giving him a big wet kiss right on the lips.
Frank reeled back as Cole stumbled away, laughing too damn hard to stand up straight. The other men laughed from their seats at Frank's reaction.
He wiped at his mouth with the back of his hand before wiping it on his pants, mad, but not mad enough to cover the smile on his face. And as Cole stumbled away, he kicked him in the butt, before returning to his seat, shaking his head in disbelief.
After righting himself, Cole took a seat next to Bob, pulling the girl in pink into his lap; Clell, Tom, and Jesiah taking up the remaining stools.
Frank raised his hand to the keep who brought him a beer and he took a long, deep drink, trying to clean out the taste.
As the large room quieted and smiles faded, Cole tapped his finger against the counter top, hunched over as he turned. The girl lolled against his chest, pulling at his hair and twisting it in her fingers.
"So what happened Jesse?" In all seriousness, "how'd they get you?" He batted the girl's hand away and she pouted before moving down to play with the buttons on his shirt, unbuttoning one and sliding her hands in against his chest.
Jesse leaned back as the keep brought him a beer and he looked at it for while, but never bent to take a drink. "I don't remember, I just kind of - all I remember is bein' on this horse an' this old man with a cross branded across his eye had Zee..." his voice faded at her name, some memories of her flooding his mind. "They burned her...and I couldn't do anything..."
He reached up to scratch the nape of his neck, then rubbed at his hair, feeling the rough skin that was now a healed rope burn. "Then they hung me, and that's it." He shrugged, trying to shift the heaviness in his shoulders. "I woke up here and that's it, that's all I remember."
Clell, who had reached into his pocket, drew out a piece of blackened metal, reached across the counter to put it in front of Jesse. "We found this, when we found you. We figured you'd want it."
Pausing, he reached down and picked it up, smoothing his thumb over the roughened pendant, the chain hanging black and leaving black dust across his hand as he moved it. It was the necklace Zee had been wearing.
Jesse bent down and kissed it, cupping it against his lips with his eyes closed, before putting it around his neck, tucking it into his shirt. Then he reached for his beer and took a hard swallow, trying to wash all the memories away again.
Frank cleared his throat loudly, even though it probably wouldn't have been so loud had the room not been so quiet. Jesse tapped his fingers against his bottle, staring at it. "So what have you been doing?"
And they all sat back with relief.
"Recruiting mostly," Cole said, taking a swig, "damn near everyone in the south is tryin' to get in with us. It's all cause of you Jesse," he looked up towards Jesse and they met eyes. "They all want to be part of the James Gang."
Jesse smiled but discarded it, "It's the Younger Gang now and you know it, I'm not in it anymore."
Frank glanced at Jesiah, whose face fell to the countertop at the comment.
"Aw, come on Jesse," Bob said, leaning back to look at him across the backs of the others. "You were the only one that could think up all the plans! Cole's horrible at it." That earned a slap across the back of the head from his brother, and a smile from Jesse.
"Don't you forget brother, I let you say "let's ride"." Cole warned and Bob came back at it with a sneering look. "I still suck at it."
"You suck at a lot of things..." Cole challenged and Bob made a move to get up.
"Boys," Frank warned and they both sank back down.
"We just need you on this last one, Jesse," Clell piped up, leaning over the counter. "Then it'll all be over, we swear."
Cole and Bob nodded in agreement. Jesse ran his hand over the stubble on his chin.
"Now boys, you know Jesse can't do anymore robberies for a while. Doctor's orders."
Jesse rubbed at his eye, watching Frank smile as his own hand rifted through his blond whiskers, breaking around his mouth.
"Frank," Jesse canted his head towards him, his black eyebrows cocked. "When have I ever listened to orders?"