Chapter five: The Letter & The Arguments
James's POV
I decided to tell Ally as soon as I saw her. As soon as I saw her, when Sirius wasn't hovering over my shoulder, that is. Weirdly, that was after the first lesson. I hadn't expected to find her when Sirius wasn't with me for a long time, although I guess the route from Transfiguration to Divination passes by the bathrooms.
"Ally!" I hissed, and she turned around, surprised.
"James? Wha-" "Ally, in here!" I grabbed her wrist and took her into a little-used classroom next door. I had to be quick. Sirius and Remus were probably looking for me. "Ally, Sirius likes Remus and Sirius has got this weird idea in his head that you are trying to seduce Remus so he's really angry at you even though even if you were seducing him you have an excuse because you didn't know that Sirius liked Remus," I said extremely fast.
Ally blinked.
"Sirius likes Remus? Aww, how cute! I always thought they looked so cute together!" Ally cooed. I sighed.
"Yes, but Sirius thinks-" "I heard you the first time, James." "Sooo..." "Sooo whaaat?" "What are you going to do about it?! About Sirius thinking you're seducing Moony!" Ally sat down on a chair by the door.
"Well, for one, he's way off track. I haven't done anything to suggest that I like Moony. Except for the whole him-owing-me thing. Well, I really don't know. If he really think I'm seducing him, he'll come after me eventually, right? That's when I'll shout to him that he's insane. That way he doesn't find out you've been conversing with the 'enemy'."
Ally can be pretty unbeleivable sometimes.
"'Kay. Well, I gotta go. They're probably sending out a search party by now. Sirius at least." Ally giggled.
"He's pretty...possessive, isn't he?" "Understatement of the century." "I thought that would be either 'Sirius thinks Remus is ok', 'Sirius doesn't really like Snape that much', or 'Lily thinks you're slightly arrogant'." "Ha, ha, ha. No, really I have to go," I said, and left.
Sirius's POV
I was so angry. I don't remember being that angry ever before in my entire life. Well, being angry at my family doesn't count.
She was leading him on. She didn't like him. I saw the way she flirted with the other boys at the school. I bet she slept with them, too. A different one every night.
With that thought as a motivation, I stormed up the whole school after all the classes for that day until I found her in front of the lake, with -- another boy. Damn, he was a cute one. And you know that's true because I didn't say that as a homosexual, I said that as another guy.
She looked at me with some surprise. "Sirius?" she asked. Obviously she could see I was angry -- I don't exactly try to hide my feelings.
"Ally," I said back in a low growl. She tensed, and turned back to the boy. "Hey, I'll see you later, Merlin." Merlin. What a stupid name.
As soon as I got to her I glared at her with such ferocity she stepped back. "Uh, Sirius?" Now I knew she was scared of me. I saw that as a good sign. Ally was a hard person to scare, unless it involved getting her to do something significant in front of the whole school. Like scoring the winning goal for Gryffindor.
"Ally." She bit her lip. "How coud you do this to him?!" I exploded, swinging my arms out. "I can't beleive you! You're just leading him on!" She looked at me with wide eyes. "H-who?" she asked, taking a deep breath. She was scared, but not too much yet.
"Remus!! Who do you think?! You're just leading him on! Making him beleive you're in love before you crush him, Ally! Crush him! And then, when he's sadder than he's ever been in his entire life, you'll laugh at him! LAUGH!!" I knew this wasn't all true, but I was pretty sure it was.
"W-what are you talking about?" I made a sigh that turned halfway into a growl. "You know perfectly well what I'm talking about! You've been making beleive you're in love with him! Seducing him! I see what you do to those other guys!"
Ally's eyes narrowed angrily. "Are you calling me a SKANK?!" she spat at me. How the bloody hell should I have known!
"No! I'm calling you a slut! A bitchy, slutty whore!" "AND WHY IS THAT?!" "I SEE THE WHAT YOU DO TO THOSE GUYS! FLIRTING WITH THEM, THEM MOViNG ONTO THE NEXT! I WOULDN'T BE SURPRISED IF YOU SLEPT WITH A NEW ONE EVERY NIGHT!" "That's rich, coming from you!" "Oh, grow up!" I shouted back, crossing my arms. "You know perfectly well I haven't even had a girlfriend since last year! But you! You act as though you're really interested in them, then move on to the next one!" "And you think I'm going to do that to Remus?" she asked in a low voice. "You think I'd do that to one of my best firends?" "You've done that to half the other males in the school, why would it be any different for an old boyfriend? Why should he get exceptions?" I shot back in a voice of pure venom. Pure, pure venom.
Then, Ally did the thing that I least expected to do. That included yelling 'Let's strip down to our underwear and swim with the giant squid! And then we can violently fight for werewolves not getting any rights!'
Yep.
I didn't expect it that much.
She cried.
I was completely shocked. I hadn't seen Ally cry since, well, two years ago. Ok, she wasn't crying that much, really. But tears were flowing down her face, and she was obviously upset. For a second I felt sorry for her, but then I remembered what she was doing to Remus and the feeling stopped.
"You have no idea," Ally said in a voice just above a whisper. "You have no idea how I feel. No idea." "That's because you don't feel. You're just another ditzy girl with her own fan club. Just another Rae Keirl."
Ally just shook her head. "Sirius...I'm not. I swear, Sirius! I'm not!" She looked as though she was about to either burst into tears or strangle me.
"Prove it! Show me you're not just another bitchy slut!" "You want a reason?! I'll give you a reason!!" she shouted, before closing her eyes and biting her lip. She sat down on the grass, and opened her eyes. I didn't know what to say. She had looked so sad and angry before, but now she just looked so...neutral.
Ally looked over the lake. "Sirius..." she whispered, closing her eyes again. "I loved Remus. I was in love with him." I stared at her. This wasn't what I had been expecting.
"I thought he was my soulmate. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. Everything was perfect." She shook her head. "Karma. You do good things and good things happen to you. I also beleive Karma is that if a good thing happens to you, a bad thing equal to it will also happen. It did."
She breathed a long sigh, and opened her eyes again.
"I could understand that he broke up with me because he wasn't in love with me anymore. After I almost wished it had been because of something like I was too annoying, or mean, or anything. So I could change, but even being able to be mad at him would be better. He seemed so truly sorry, I couldn't help but feel guilty. It wasn't his fault.
"So, that's where I am now. Sirius, I'm not a slut. I'm just searching for my true soulmate. My kindred spirit. My other half.
"I've accepted that Remus can never be mine and I've moved on."
She breathed deeply again, and walked towards the castle. When she was almost to the steps, without turning around, she said, "They say the hardest thing about moving on is not looking back, and I have to say that is absolutely true. It is."
Sirius's POV
Despite everything I had said earlier, Ally was actually very smart. I knew there was a lot of truth behind what she had said; not only only about moving on, but also about accepting things and moving on. I sighed, shaking my head as I stared over the lake again.
I may as well face it. Not that I hadn't already. Remus could never love me.
Never.
That thought just made me feel even more depressed than before, so I stopped thinking about it.
I knew what I had to do -- I had to move on, like Ally. Find someone else, my real soulmate. A person to love who loves me back.
I lay down, still staring over the lake. It would be hard. I knew it would hurt me more than I could ever imagine, to watch him...to move on. A tear appeared in my eye, though I made no intention of stopping it. I knew I may as well cry. What difference would it make, anyway?
I sniffed. Maybe this would be too hard. Maybe I should just give it all up. Everything.
To look at him ever day...to gaze into those eyes...to see that beautiful hair...knowing it's all always just one step away. I can take the step, if I choose. I may get pushed off the edge of the bridge. I may be accepted onto the ledge. Or I could just turn around and go back home, searching for a more stable bridge.
Remus' POV
Over the next couple of days, nothing much happened. The weather grew steadily worse, the classes steadily harder, and I began to suspect that Sirius was avoiding me.
Well, I didn't need to suspect it. I knew it. He was pretty obvious about it, at least to the people that knew him best. He kept on avoiding my eye, hardly talked to me anymore and I hardly ever saw him. On top of all that, he always looked depressed, and I had no idea why for any of the above.
When asked, he would simply shrug, and avoid the person's eyes. He never wanted to play with us anymore, but James and I truly beleived something was wrong when Snape called him a man-whore and he acted as though he hadn't even heard him.
Me and James tried as much as we could to find out what was wrong, but he was hardly speaking to me at all, and when James asked, he just shrugged and avoided his eyes like all those times before. James suggested that we try asking Ally in case he told her; she said that what he had told her had given her a rough idea, but she wasn't saying anything. She has already been very firm about not giving away secrets. She also said to James that if you look at everything he's told him, and what she's done, he'll come up with an answer. That was also when I got the feeling that Sirius hadn't just started avoiding me.
After two days, I was torn. I was completely upset that he was so sad, but reall mad at him for not telling us, for not telling me, what was wrong, and for avoiding me.
At breakfast on that second day, I was feeling really alone. I was starting to think that Sirius had found out I fancied him, and didn't want to be friends with me anymore. I sighed and picked at my scrambled eggs.
Suddenly, I heard the post owls come in. Instinctively, I looked up, and saw my owl! "Celeste!" I cried, and the snowy owl flew down to me. As she she touched down onto my table, she held her head out for me to pat. I grinned. I knew that know matter what happened, no matter what changed, Celeste would always crave affection.
I took the letter from her leg, and grinned even more. My parents! I couldn't beleive I had forgotten them. I ripped the letter open and read it.
Dear Remus.
Hey, honey! How are things? It's pretty normal here. It's raining nearly every day! You'd love it!
Your sister is doing well, too. Yesterday Artemis was wishing her hair was long and dusty purple, and it changed! She's so smart, you should be so proud of your sister. She can't wait for next year when she goes to Hogwarts- she's already counting down the days! She got the spell from your father.
As for your condition, we haven't had any progress. We think we've found something that could be useful- we're experimenting with a potion that could let you be in control of your thoughts and emotions while you're transformed, but even if it does work it won't be ready for another year or so.
Keep up the good work,
Mum
P.S. Hey, Rem! It's Artemis here! I look so cool, everyone loves my hair! I think I'll keep it this way. How's Hogwarts? Has Lily finally agreed to go out with James? Has Sirius gone out with every girl in the school yet? Has Peter finally cracked? Write back with ALL the goss.
Love ya!
Artemis
Remus shook his head. Yes, Artemis and his mum would always be the same, too. He chuckled at Artemis' enthusiasim for going to Hogwarts. I decided to write back right away, so I finished my scrambled eggs, took the letter, and gave Celeste one final pat before I walked off to the owlery.
My trip to the owlery was rather unneventful, though when I got there it was anything but. When I opened the door, I saw someone else was already there, stroking an owl that hovered somewhere between sandy brown and golden brown. Someone with long, black hair that fell into his amazingly blue eyes. Someone who, apparently, hadn't noticed that they weren't the only people in the owlery anymore.
Sirius Black.
"...I just don't know what to do, Blaze," he murmered to the owl. "I'm trying to do what Ally said, but it's just so hard...I-I can't do it..." "Sirius?" I asked, and as he whipped around to face me, I mentally kicked myself. If I had kept quiet, I might have been able to find out what was wrong. 'How stupid am I?!' "R-Remus?" he asked, surprised. "W-what are you doing here? What did you hear? When did you come in?" "I came in around 'I just don't know what to do,'" I replied cooly.
"Well, I'll just...leave now. You won't want me hanging around." He tried to push past me, but I stopped him. "No, Sirius. Stay here." He shook his head.
"No, really, I'll go." "Stay." He stared up at me. I hardly ever spoke as firmly as that. Not that I was a pushover or something, I was more the kind of I-don't-get-mad-easy-but-if-you-get-me-mad-I-can-break-things-you-didn't-even-know-you-had-or-even-did-have-in-the-first-place person, and he was bloody annoying me.
"O-Ok," he said, and retreated to the back of the owlery.
"Sirius, what I want to know is why you've been ignoring me for the past few days and acting weird," I said, going straight for the point.
"I haven't," Sirius muttered, avoiding my eyes.
"Yes you have!" I cried, heating up. "You're doing it now! You're not looking at me!" Sirius looked up at me, startled. "All I want to know is Why?!" "Uh, I...I can't tell you.." he finished lamely. I heaved an exaggerated sigh.
"Why?! You don't trust me?! You told James, and by what I heard you saying before, you told Ally, too! Haven't I kept all your secrets?! Did I tell anyone about you guys?!?" (Sirius looked around nervously), "Haven't I always told you guys everything?!?" I was shouting now. The sound was reverberating off the walls and choing down the castle, but I didn't care. I just wanted to know. "What about my biggest secret, huh?!! Didn't I tell you that?! Sure, I kept it from you for a while-" "One and a half years.." Sirius mumbled.
"So bloody what?!" I shouted back, and Sirius cowered backwards until he was right against the wall. "I told you eventually, didn't I!?! AND DID YOU GUYS CARE?! NO!! SO WHY THE HELL SHOULD THIS BE ANY DIFFERENT?!?!" We had attracted quite a crowd now. Most people had probably never heard me yelling; not that I never do, I just only do it when I'm really mad, and I don't usually yell at someone at the top of a tower that overlooks all of Hogwarts. Sirius was looking very much like he just wanted to dissapear right on the spot.
"WHY, SIRIUS?! TELL ME!" Sirius opened his mouth to say something, but no sound came out.
"It's...it's not that..." he said softly.
"WELL THEN, WHAT THE BLOODY HELL IS IT?!" "I...I..." I looked at him with such hatred he flinched.
"No, Sirius," I said softly, but venomly. This was my last, my most lethal weapon. "I don't want to hear another excuse," I said, before turning around and walking away. I thought I saw James as I walked past; he looked extremely shocked; but I just ignored him.
Sirius' POV
I really did it this time.
James's POV
I decided to tell Ally as soon as I saw her. As soon as I saw her, when Sirius wasn't hovering over my shoulder, that is. Weirdly, that was after the first lesson. I hadn't expected to find her when Sirius wasn't with me for a long time, although I guess the route from Transfiguration to Divination passes by the bathrooms.
"Ally!" I hissed, and she turned around, surprised.
"James? Wha-" "Ally, in here!" I grabbed her wrist and took her into a little-used classroom next door. I had to be quick. Sirius and Remus were probably looking for me. "Ally, Sirius likes Remus and Sirius has got this weird idea in his head that you are trying to seduce Remus so he's really angry at you even though even if you were seducing him you have an excuse because you didn't know that Sirius liked Remus," I said extremely fast.
Ally blinked.
"Sirius likes Remus? Aww, how cute! I always thought they looked so cute together!" Ally cooed. I sighed.
"Yes, but Sirius thinks-" "I heard you the first time, James." "Sooo..." "Sooo whaaat?" "What are you going to do about it?! About Sirius thinking you're seducing Moony!" Ally sat down on a chair by the door.
"Well, for one, he's way off track. I haven't done anything to suggest that I like Moony. Except for the whole him-owing-me thing. Well, I really don't know. If he really think I'm seducing him, he'll come after me eventually, right? That's when I'll shout to him that he's insane. That way he doesn't find out you've been conversing with the 'enemy'."
Ally can be pretty unbeleivable sometimes.
"'Kay. Well, I gotta go. They're probably sending out a search party by now. Sirius at least." Ally giggled.
"He's pretty...possessive, isn't he?" "Understatement of the century." "I thought that would be either 'Sirius thinks Remus is ok', 'Sirius doesn't really like Snape that much', or 'Lily thinks you're slightly arrogant'." "Ha, ha, ha. No, really I have to go," I said, and left.
Sirius's POV
I was so angry. I don't remember being that angry ever before in my entire life. Well, being angry at my family doesn't count.
She was leading him on. She didn't like him. I saw the way she flirted with the other boys at the school. I bet she slept with them, too. A different one every night.
With that thought as a motivation, I stormed up the whole school after all the classes for that day until I found her in front of the lake, with -- another boy. Damn, he was a cute one. And you know that's true because I didn't say that as a homosexual, I said that as another guy.
She looked at me with some surprise. "Sirius?" she asked. Obviously she could see I was angry -- I don't exactly try to hide my feelings.
"Ally," I said back in a low growl. She tensed, and turned back to the boy. "Hey, I'll see you later, Merlin." Merlin. What a stupid name.
As soon as I got to her I glared at her with such ferocity she stepped back. "Uh, Sirius?" Now I knew she was scared of me. I saw that as a good sign. Ally was a hard person to scare, unless it involved getting her to do something significant in front of the whole school. Like scoring the winning goal for Gryffindor.
"Ally." She bit her lip. "How coud you do this to him?!" I exploded, swinging my arms out. "I can't beleive you! You're just leading him on!" She looked at me with wide eyes. "H-who?" she asked, taking a deep breath. She was scared, but not too much yet.
"Remus!! Who do you think?! You're just leading him on! Making him beleive you're in love before you crush him, Ally! Crush him! And then, when he's sadder than he's ever been in his entire life, you'll laugh at him! LAUGH!!" I knew this wasn't all true, but I was pretty sure it was.
"W-what are you talking about?" I made a sigh that turned halfway into a growl. "You know perfectly well what I'm talking about! You've been making beleive you're in love with him! Seducing him! I see what you do to those other guys!"
Ally's eyes narrowed angrily. "Are you calling me a SKANK?!" she spat at me. How the bloody hell should I have known!
"No! I'm calling you a slut! A bitchy, slutty whore!" "AND WHY IS THAT?!" "I SEE THE WHAT YOU DO TO THOSE GUYS! FLIRTING WITH THEM, THEM MOViNG ONTO THE NEXT! I WOULDN'T BE SURPRISED IF YOU SLEPT WITH A NEW ONE EVERY NIGHT!" "That's rich, coming from you!" "Oh, grow up!" I shouted back, crossing my arms. "You know perfectly well I haven't even had a girlfriend since last year! But you! You act as though you're really interested in them, then move on to the next one!" "And you think I'm going to do that to Remus?" she asked in a low voice. "You think I'd do that to one of my best firends?" "You've done that to half the other males in the school, why would it be any different for an old boyfriend? Why should he get exceptions?" I shot back in a voice of pure venom. Pure, pure venom.
Then, Ally did the thing that I least expected to do. That included yelling 'Let's strip down to our underwear and swim with the giant squid! And then we can violently fight for werewolves not getting any rights!'
Yep.
I didn't expect it that much.
She cried.
I was completely shocked. I hadn't seen Ally cry since, well, two years ago. Ok, she wasn't crying that much, really. But tears were flowing down her face, and she was obviously upset. For a second I felt sorry for her, but then I remembered what she was doing to Remus and the feeling stopped.
"You have no idea," Ally said in a voice just above a whisper. "You have no idea how I feel. No idea." "That's because you don't feel. You're just another ditzy girl with her own fan club. Just another Rae Keirl."
Ally just shook her head. "Sirius...I'm not. I swear, Sirius! I'm not!" She looked as though she was about to either burst into tears or strangle me.
"Prove it! Show me you're not just another bitchy slut!" "You want a reason?! I'll give you a reason!!" she shouted, before closing her eyes and biting her lip. She sat down on the grass, and opened her eyes. I didn't know what to say. She had looked so sad and angry before, but now she just looked so...neutral.
Ally looked over the lake. "Sirius..." she whispered, closing her eyes again. "I loved Remus. I was in love with him." I stared at her. This wasn't what I had been expecting.
"I thought he was my soulmate. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. Everything was perfect." She shook her head. "Karma. You do good things and good things happen to you. I also beleive Karma is that if a good thing happens to you, a bad thing equal to it will also happen. It did."
She breathed a long sigh, and opened her eyes again.
"I could understand that he broke up with me because he wasn't in love with me anymore. After I almost wished it had been because of something like I was too annoying, or mean, or anything. So I could change, but even being able to be mad at him would be better. He seemed so truly sorry, I couldn't help but feel guilty. It wasn't his fault.
"So, that's where I am now. Sirius, I'm not a slut. I'm just searching for my true soulmate. My kindred spirit. My other half.
"I've accepted that Remus can never be mine and I've moved on."
She breathed deeply again, and walked towards the castle. When she was almost to the steps, without turning around, she said, "They say the hardest thing about moving on is not looking back, and I have to say that is absolutely true. It is."
Sirius's POV
Despite everything I had said earlier, Ally was actually very smart. I knew there was a lot of truth behind what she had said; not only only about moving on, but also about accepting things and moving on. I sighed, shaking my head as I stared over the lake again.
I may as well face it. Not that I hadn't already. Remus could never love me.
Never.
That thought just made me feel even more depressed than before, so I stopped thinking about it.
I knew what I had to do -- I had to move on, like Ally. Find someone else, my real soulmate. A person to love who loves me back.
I lay down, still staring over the lake. It would be hard. I knew it would hurt me more than I could ever imagine, to watch him...to move on. A tear appeared in my eye, though I made no intention of stopping it. I knew I may as well cry. What difference would it make, anyway?
I sniffed. Maybe this would be too hard. Maybe I should just give it all up. Everything.
To look at him ever day...to gaze into those eyes...to see that beautiful hair...knowing it's all always just one step away. I can take the step, if I choose. I may get pushed off the edge of the bridge. I may be accepted onto the ledge. Or I could just turn around and go back home, searching for a more stable bridge.
Remus' POV
Over the next couple of days, nothing much happened. The weather grew steadily worse, the classes steadily harder, and I began to suspect that Sirius was avoiding me.
Well, I didn't need to suspect it. I knew it. He was pretty obvious about it, at least to the people that knew him best. He kept on avoiding my eye, hardly talked to me anymore and I hardly ever saw him. On top of all that, he always looked depressed, and I had no idea why for any of the above.
When asked, he would simply shrug, and avoid the person's eyes. He never wanted to play with us anymore, but James and I truly beleived something was wrong when Snape called him a man-whore and he acted as though he hadn't even heard him.
Me and James tried as much as we could to find out what was wrong, but he was hardly speaking to me at all, and when James asked, he just shrugged and avoided his eyes like all those times before. James suggested that we try asking Ally in case he told her; she said that what he had told her had given her a rough idea, but she wasn't saying anything. She has already been very firm about not giving away secrets. She also said to James that if you look at everything he's told him, and what she's done, he'll come up with an answer. That was also when I got the feeling that Sirius hadn't just started avoiding me.
After two days, I was torn. I was completely upset that he was so sad, but reall mad at him for not telling us, for not telling me, what was wrong, and for avoiding me.
At breakfast on that second day, I was feeling really alone. I was starting to think that Sirius had found out I fancied him, and didn't want to be friends with me anymore. I sighed and picked at my scrambled eggs.
Suddenly, I heard the post owls come in. Instinctively, I looked up, and saw my owl! "Celeste!" I cried, and the snowy owl flew down to me. As she she touched down onto my table, she held her head out for me to pat. I grinned. I knew that know matter what happened, no matter what changed, Celeste would always crave affection.
I took the letter from her leg, and grinned even more. My parents! I couldn't beleive I had forgotten them. I ripped the letter open and read it.
Dear Remus.
Hey, honey! How are things? It's pretty normal here. It's raining nearly every day! You'd love it!
Your sister is doing well, too. Yesterday Artemis was wishing her hair was long and dusty purple, and it changed! She's so smart, you should be so proud of your sister. She can't wait for next year when she goes to Hogwarts- she's already counting down the days! She got the spell from your father.
As for your condition, we haven't had any progress. We think we've found something that could be useful- we're experimenting with a potion that could let you be in control of your thoughts and emotions while you're transformed, but even if it does work it won't be ready for another year or so.
Keep up the good work,
Mum
P.S. Hey, Rem! It's Artemis here! I look so cool, everyone loves my hair! I think I'll keep it this way. How's Hogwarts? Has Lily finally agreed to go out with James? Has Sirius gone out with every girl in the school yet? Has Peter finally cracked? Write back with ALL the goss.
Love ya!
Artemis
Remus shook his head. Yes, Artemis and his mum would always be the same, too. He chuckled at Artemis' enthusiasim for going to Hogwarts. I decided to write back right away, so I finished my scrambled eggs, took the letter, and gave Celeste one final pat before I walked off to the owlery.
My trip to the owlery was rather unneventful, though when I got there it was anything but. When I opened the door, I saw someone else was already there, stroking an owl that hovered somewhere between sandy brown and golden brown. Someone with long, black hair that fell into his amazingly blue eyes. Someone who, apparently, hadn't noticed that they weren't the only people in the owlery anymore.
Sirius Black.
"...I just don't know what to do, Blaze," he murmered to the owl. "I'm trying to do what Ally said, but it's just so hard...I-I can't do it..." "Sirius?" I asked, and as he whipped around to face me, I mentally kicked myself. If I had kept quiet, I might have been able to find out what was wrong. 'How stupid am I?!' "R-Remus?" he asked, surprised. "W-what are you doing here? What did you hear? When did you come in?" "I came in around 'I just don't know what to do,'" I replied cooly.
"Well, I'll just...leave now. You won't want me hanging around." He tried to push past me, but I stopped him. "No, Sirius. Stay here." He shook his head.
"No, really, I'll go." "Stay." He stared up at me. I hardly ever spoke as firmly as that. Not that I was a pushover or something, I was more the kind of I-don't-get-mad-easy-but-if-you-get-me-mad-I-can-break-things-you-didn't-even-know-you-had-or-even-did-have-in-the-first-place person, and he was bloody annoying me.
"O-Ok," he said, and retreated to the back of the owlery.
"Sirius, what I want to know is why you've been ignoring me for the past few days and acting weird," I said, going straight for the point.
"I haven't," Sirius muttered, avoiding my eyes.
"Yes you have!" I cried, heating up. "You're doing it now! You're not looking at me!" Sirius looked up at me, startled. "All I want to know is Why?!" "Uh, I...I can't tell you.." he finished lamely. I heaved an exaggerated sigh.
"Why?! You don't trust me?! You told James, and by what I heard you saying before, you told Ally, too! Haven't I kept all your secrets?! Did I tell anyone about you guys?!?" (Sirius looked around nervously), "Haven't I always told you guys everything?!?" I was shouting now. The sound was reverberating off the walls and choing down the castle, but I didn't care. I just wanted to know. "What about my biggest secret, huh?!! Didn't I tell you that?! Sure, I kept it from you for a while-" "One and a half years.." Sirius mumbled.
"So bloody what?!" I shouted back, and Sirius cowered backwards until he was right against the wall. "I told you eventually, didn't I!?! AND DID YOU GUYS CARE?! NO!! SO WHY THE HELL SHOULD THIS BE ANY DIFFERENT?!?!" We had attracted quite a crowd now. Most people had probably never heard me yelling; not that I never do, I just only do it when I'm really mad, and I don't usually yell at someone at the top of a tower that overlooks all of Hogwarts. Sirius was looking very much like he just wanted to dissapear right on the spot.
"WHY, SIRIUS?! TELL ME!" Sirius opened his mouth to say something, but no sound came out.
"It's...it's not that..." he said softly.
"WELL THEN, WHAT THE BLOODY HELL IS IT?!" "I...I..." I looked at him with such hatred he flinched.
"No, Sirius," I said softly, but venomly. This was my last, my most lethal weapon. "I don't want to hear another excuse," I said, before turning around and walking away. I thought I saw James as I walked past; he looked extremely shocked; but I just ignored him.
Sirius' POV
I really did it this time.