Notes: And so after eight years, finally an attempt to continue this story that I still want to tell. But I have come to terms with the fact that my heart is still with the old Dic dub. I tried, but part of the reason I stalled was because I wasn't happy trying to write a long fic for a different version. I have quietly replaced all of the prior chapters with this new version, and this chapter continues the story from where it left off, but with the dub names and female Zoisite. I have also removed two subplots about Mina I no longer want to do and have not been happy with. I promise, however, that the story will continue to be deep as it was. When writing for dubs, I always put in things that were cut out of them. I apologize to anyone who wanted this story to stay as the original Japanese version, but I am following my heart now. And that is a very Sailor Moon thing to do, isn't it?

Chapter Seven

Nephrite was quiet again as he and Molly walked to a restaurant she had suggested. Molly bit her lip, concerned, but didn't say anything until they were settled at a table away from most of the crowd. "Nephrite . . ."

He started and looked to her. "Hmm?"

"We don't have to do this now, if you don't want to," Molly said. "I know you must be pretty upset, talking to those people you knew." Idly she played with the silverware, wrapped in its napkin on her side of the table.

"No, it's fine," Nephrite answered. "I'm just wondering about Zoisite."

Molly frowned. "It's hard for me to believe she's different than she was," she said. "When I met her, she wasn't sorry at all for what she did to you."

"It's not easy for me to believe, either," Nephrite said. "But I'd like to find her and see for myself if she's changed."

Molly slowly picked up the menu. "And that weird stuff about you trying to stop Serena and her boyfriend from being together in the past," she said. "Could that really have happened?"

"It could have, if it's actually true that they lived past lives." Nephrite looked puzzled. "I don't remember dying more than once, but how could I have stayed alive from the time of the Silver Millennium up to when Zoisite arranged for my murder three years ago?"

"That doesn't sound possible," Molly agreed. "Unless it was some kind of dark magic that Beryl person used on you and the others?"

"Maybe." Nephrite stared into the distance. "I wonder if anyone actually knows how long ago the Moon Kingdom existed and was destroyed."

"I have no idea," Molly said. "I didn't even know about any of these things until today."

"I'll have to talk to Sailor Moon about it." Nephrite had also been looking over a menu, which he set down now, still studying it.

"And that one man wanted to talk to you too," Molly worried. "Do you think it's safe to see him?"

"Yes, especially if we meet on my terms," Nephrite said. "I won't be pulled onto his and Jadeite's turf."

"I hope not. Oh." Molly came to attention, noting his mystification. "Are you not sure what to choose?"

"I'm just not familiar with a lot of these dishes," Nephrite admitted, feeling somewhat awkward.

Molly smiled. "Pretty much all of these things are good," she said. "But you really can't go wrong with the turkey and mashed potatoes."

"Alright then," Nephrite said. "I'll try that." He smiled.

Molly smiled too. This was what she had dreamed of for so long and had thought would never come to pass. It still felt like a dream, but somehow it was real.

She just prayed those former associates of Nephrite's wouldn't ruin everything.

Before long the waiter came and took their orders. As they waited, a silence fell over them again. They were taking in the scene, the moment, just being together.

". . . You really aren't bothered by everything we've been learning today?"

Molly snapped back to the present at Nephrite's earnest, concerned question. "Of course I'm bothered, but not for the reasons you're probably thinking," she said. "I'm wondering what kind of a horrible person that Queen Beryl was, to be able to turn all of you against the guy you were trying to protect. You didn't remember any of it until now! Does that mean you didn't remember then, either?"

"I . . . I don't know," Nephrite admitted. "Were we brainwashed then? In the memory I saw, I still remembered you, and Endymion . . ."

"Maybe it was done a little at a time," Molly suggested. "You couldn't have attacked the Moon Kingdom while remembering everything, could you?!"

". . . I don't want to believe that, but . . . we were so against the romance." Nephrite still looked shaken. "What if we honestly thought we had to destroy the kingdom to have peace?"

Molly shook her head. "No! I can't believe that! I won't."

Nephrite sighed, tiredly. "What do you really know about me, Molly? . . . In fact, what do I really know about myself? I manipulated you, I lied to you . . ."

"It was all you knew," Molly interrupted. "You saved my life twice and you died for me! That's the real you, Nephrite. The other was just how you were because of the brainwashing."

". . . I wish I had your faith," Nephrite said.

"Someday you'll know everything," Molly said confidently. "Your memories are starting to come back. You'll see it's all like I'm saying."

Deciding it wasn't worth continuing to argue the point, Nephrite just smiled a bit at her sweetness. "I hope so," he said quietly.

"I wish I could help more," Molly said. "Serena's barely told me anything. I kind of suspected she was Sailor Moon for a long time, but I didn't know until today. She sure never told me anything about a past life." She sighed. "I know it was all to protect me, but still . . . I wish I'd known. We used to be so close." She managed a smile. "See, you weren't the only one lying to me."

"She lied for unselfish reasons," Nephrite objected. "You can't compare the two."

"Maybe not. But I still believe both of you will change," Molly said. "Now that I know the truth, Serena has no reason to keep things from me. You don't have any reason to lie to me either."

It was certainly a nice thought. Nephrite wanted to believe that too. But still. . . .

"It's not a matter of having a reason," Nephrite said. "Compulsive liars usually can't make themselves stop lying, even when there's no reason."

Molly shook her head with a smile. "I have more faith in you than that."

"You're the only one who's believed in me since I don't know how long," Nephrite said. "Maybe since Endymion."

"Serena believes in you too," Molly said.

That certainly bowled Nephrite over too. But he saw no point in remarking on it. It was likely because of how he had died saving Molly.

That was a good reason, he supposed.

They both came to attention as the food was served. Nephrite looked at it in wonder and reached for the knife and fork. "It smells delicious," he said in appreciative surprise.

"And it tastes even better!" Molly smiled as she started in on hers.

Nephrite took his first bite. ". . . You're right," he said, awed. "This is amazing. Beryl kept more from us than our memories."

Molly beamed. "There's so many good things to eat! Now you can try them all!"

"I'm looking forward to it," Nephrite said. "Especially if we try them together."

"I wouldn't want it any other way," Molly said fondly.

xxxx

Jadeite was more than a little frustrated. It felt like he and Malachite had been wandering for ages, with no sign of Zoisite anywhere. From Malachite's tense stance and frosty expression, he was losing patience too. But with his strong military training and resolve, he would not be likely to show it beyond this display.

"Let's go back, Malachite," Jadeite spoke at last. "She's nowhere around here. Why don't we go . . . look at those memory spheres some more?" It was a testament to how done he felt that he was expressing any interest in the orbs.

Malachite exhaled, sharply. "Yes, let's do that." He really didn't want to concede defeat, but he could see how fruitless the search was so far. Maybe later he would go out again, by himself, and try more places. He had been focusing on parks and gardens, beautiful places where Zoisite would be most likely to go. But if she didn't want to be found, would she frequent such places at all? That was a question he couldn't answer.

Would she really hide from him? Maybe she didn't know he was alive and looking for her. Or . . . maybe she was so devastated over what she had done to Nephrite that she didn't want to see anyone.

Yes, looking at the spheres was a good idea. Maybe if Malachite could figure out more of what they were all like in this other existence, that would give him a clue as to where to look to find Zoisite. He abruptly turned to head back home.

Jadeite started, but was relieved to walk alongside him on the way. "We only have that girl's word that she may have seen Zoisite anyway," he said. "Maybe it wasn't her."

Malachite grunted. "The Sailor Scouts are highly observant. And the rest of us are here. Why not Zoisite as well?"

Well, Jadeite couldn't really argue that logic.

"I don't know what you have against females anyway," Malachite continued in annoyance. "Your ideals are archaic, yet you talk of wanting to live in the present and not the past."

Jadeite grunted and looked away, not caring to discuss it. ". . . We really need to get something to eat here," he said instead.

"I'll leave that up to you, since you are so skilled at fitting into the human world," Malachite replied.

Jadeite didn't protest. "I might just order some pizza or something."

"Fine. Do whatever you wish."

They approached the house and Malachite was quick to unlock it and go inside. Not terribly interested in whether Jadeite was following or not, he strode upstairs to the room he had claimed as his and took out the orbs in his pocket. He would just sit and watch them for a while, maybe try to determine which one was his and what his true self was like. He wanted to remember. He had to remember.

Downstairs, Jadeite conjured a Smartphone and looked through the local listings until he found the closest pizza parlor. He called, placed the order, and leaned against the wall to wait. He didn't care to go back up to Malachite until the delivery boy arrived, so he spent some time just reading about the current world and familiarizing himself with the changes over the last three years. That kept him quite occupied until the doorbell rang.

After paying the kid and getting out a plate for himself, he headed upstairs munching on a piece of pizza. "Malachite? The food's here," he called. When he didn't receive an immediate response, he went into Malachite's room and then stopped short, stunned. Malachite was sitting on his bed, holding one of the orbs between his fingers. He was sheet-white again, drawn and haggard, completely still as he stared at the scene inside it.

Jadeite frowned deeply and walked around to see what Malachite was seeing. "Malachite?" The orb was black now. Whatever it had been showing had ended, but Malachite seemed not to recognize it. Jadeite waited a moment before speaking again in a more commanding voice. "Malachite!"

The authoritative tone pierced whatever state Malachite had fallen into. He started and turned, looking up at his colleague with haunted eyes. "This orb is mine," he rasped. "I saw it all. . . ."

"You couldn't have seen all of your life's memories in an hour," Jadeite objected.

"I saw enough." Malachite's gloved hand closed around the orb. "When I watched it longer and willed it so, I could hear what was being said. We served Endymion, as we had already deduced. The Moon Kingdom and the Earth were at odds, and when he fell in love with the Princess of the Moon, we were concerned of the ramifications of that. We went to Beryl, who was part of his court, and she began to slowly brainwash us to help her destroy the Moon Kingdom. When we were fully under her evil magic, she led an assault against them." He fell back, shaking. "It was because of her and us that the Silver Millennium fell! So many lives senselessly destroyed at our hands!"

Jadeite frowned more, but kept eating. He wasn't sure what to say, what to think. Everything they had thought they knew was a lie. It sounded like a nightmare, something incomprehensible right now. He didn't want to try to comprehend it. He wanted to focus on the present. The present wasn't frightening. It wasn't filled with horrors involving them and that they had caused.

"This orb is yours." Malachite shoved another one at Jadeite. "Take it. Watch it!"

Jadeite jumped back. "No!" The orb clattered to the floor, but he made no motion to pick it up. "Malachite, I don't want to remember. I want to build a new life for myself without the past to haunt me! What good will seeing and knowing what we did before do us?!"

"Without our memories, we're only a fraction of ourselves!" Malachite boomed, getting to his feet. "I want to know who I truly am!"

"I'm alright with just a fraction!" Jadeite retorted. "I'll figure out who I am now by crafting my new existence! I don't need to know what atrocities I committed in some long-ago time! I don't need that weighing me down!"

"It's not only that!" Malachite countered. "Without seeing what was, you don't know who you were close to, who your allies were! You're alone!"

"I have you to tell me!" Jadeite said. "So we were close to Endymion and each other! We aren't anymore! Just seeing the past isn't going to magically erase decades, centuries, of hurt and betrayal! We helped massacre a peaceful kingdom! Zoisite killed Nephrite! We can't go back from any of that! Endymion doesn't remember us either! Did you stop to wonder why? Maybe he doesn't want to! Maybe those memories are being held back from him because we're poison! It's over. It's all over! Just accept it and try to move on! We have to start over!" With that he turned and spun out of the room, storming downstairs.

Malachite snarled. For a long moment he stood, staring out the open doorway. Then he scooped up the rejected orb and held it close.

Whether he wanted to acknowledge it or not, Jadeite had a point. They were no longer who they had once been. Remembering the whole truth was not an instant fix. Perhaps it gave them added incentive to try to be better people, but it didn't change all that they had already done. Nephrite had been very cool with them, which was completely understandable. And Zoisite . . . Zoisite might never be able to recover from the knowledge of what she had done to him. Even though she had been brainwashed, even though they had all been brainwashed, how could Nephrite ever trust her again? How could Endymion ever trust them? The Sailor Scouts?

. . . And if Zoisite couldn't handle her part in what had happened to Nephrite, how would she ever come to terms with the destruction of the Silver Millennium?

Malachite shut his eyes tightly. He had no idea what to do now.

Finally he shoved the orbs back in his pocket and trudged downstairs. Jadeite was at the table, still eating pizza. He didn't look up.

Heaving a sigh, Malachite sank down at the table across from him and slowly took a slice of pizza out of the box.

". . . What are you going to do?" Jadeite asked after a moment.

"I don't know," Malachite admitted. "Nephrite said he would be back later . . . Maybe talking with him should be the next step. And the Sailor Scouts and Endymion . . . I have to tell them everything I've learned. It will be up to them to decide what to do about it. I won't force you to take part in any of this if you don't want to, but I will leave your memories where you can take them if you change your mind."

Jadeite gave a slight nod of acknowledgement. "Thanks."

"I'll offer Nephrite's to him as well."

"And Zoisite?"

Malachite had to shake his head. "I don't know. I'll tell her about the orb, and warn her that while it will bring more understanding, it will also bring a heavy burden of guilt and responsibility. She's already struggling. I don't know how she will handle what our memories have to tell us."

"How will any of us handle it?" Jadeite wondered as he ate.

Malachite couldn't answer that either.

xxxx

The Sailor Scouts hadn't had any better luck finding Zoisite. At last in discouragement, they had de-transformed and returned to the shrine to further discuss the major developments in the case.

"She could be anywhere," Lita said in frustration.

"We'll just have to stay on guard for any possible sightings of her," Amy said. "Maybe she really isn't dangerous now."

Serena was staring off into space. "How am I going to keep my identity secret when there's two Dark Kingdom guys across the street?!" she exclaimed. "Everyone will start noticing something weird's going on, especially if they show they know me!"

"I'm sure they don't want to be discovered either," Amy said. "They'll probably be careful."

Serena just crossed her arms on the table and dropped her head onto them in frustration. "And then there's that weird memory Nephrite was having. . . . What was that?!"

"What weird memory?!" Luna frowned.

"That's right, you weren't there, Luna," Lita said. She and the others all hastened to explain. Artemis stayed quiet, exchanging a look with Luna as she grew more and more grim.

"Hey . . ." Serena looked up with a jerk. "Luna, don't you have all your memories?!"

Luna started. "Well, um . . . yes, I do," she conceded. "So does Artemis."

"We think," Artemis interjected.

"Then you already know!" Serena cried. "Don't you?!"

Luna's ears drooped in her defeat. "The truth was already mostly figured out when Nephrite told what he remembered," she said. "Yes, they were Endymion's protectors. They were loyal to him and loved him and each other, much as you and the Sailor Scouts do. When they were sincerely worried about the romance between Endymion and Serenity, they went to Beryl for advice. I don't know what she did to them, but they were all present at the destruction of the Silver Millennium. They came with Beryl when she attacked. The girls all insisted something wasn't right, that they weren't themselves, but . . ." She trailed off, haunted by the memories of the past.

". . . Oh Luna . . ." Serena whispered. She picked up the cat and held her close.

Mina picked up Artemis likewise. "How awful. . . ."

Lita slammed her hand on the table. "And now they're all back here again! I can't trust them. How can anyone trust them?!"

"They were probably brainwashed, just like Beryl did to Darien," Artemis pointed out. "And if that's the case, they're all victims too."

"Except that they deliberately went to Beryl," Lita said. "They wanted to split up Princess Serenity and Endymion! That's just . . ." She clenched her teeth.

Mina looked angry about it too. "I can't respect someone who would interfere with love," she said in revulsion. But then her shoulders slumped and she sighed. "Only . . . maybe they really just wanted advice and Beryl only got them to want to actually do something about it when she started brainwashing them. . . ."

"I guess we can't know until all their memories come back somehow," Serena sighed.

"I'm afraid so," Luna said.

Serena fell silent for a long moment. ". . . Was Molly there?" she all but whispered. "When the Silver Millennium was destroyed, I mean." She didn't want to know, and yet she felt she had to know.

Luna hesitated so long that the answer was obvious. When she finally spoke, it was very quiet and resigned. ". . . Yes, she was."

Tears pricked Serena's eyes. "No. . . . Poor Molly. . . ." She drew a shaking breath. "How did she . . . you know . . . ?"

Luna sighed sadly. "Apparently she heard about the attack somehow and came to try to warn us and to stop it," she said. "She thought she could talk some sense into Nephrite."

Amy gasped. "He didn't . . . ?!"

"No," Luna quickly said. "It was Zoisite. She was furious at Molly interfering with the plan and killed her in front of Nephrite's eyes. He snapped and attacked her. I don't know what happened from there; so much was going on and I was trying to protect the Princess."

Lita snarled. "Zoisite again! What is it with her?!"

"Maybe something in her personality made her especially susceptible to the brainwashing," Artemis said. "I don't know."

Amy frowned. "She was so upset when I found her. . . . I can't believe she's really so cruel in her right mind."

Raye had been silent during all of this. Finally Serena looked over at her. "Raye?"

Raye was clenching her fists. "All of the lives Beryl destroyed . . . it's unforgivable." She looked up. "I don't know what to think of the Shitennou, but I did see in my vision that Nephrite can be trusted, at least. The others . . ." She frowned and shook her head. "I don't know. But if they're no longer under Beryl's control, maybe they're not a threat."

"You said we might need all of their help," Lita said. "What did you see?"

"All of us and all of them using our powers against a dark shadow that was growing in size and strength," Raye said.

"That sounds pretty straightforward to me," Serena said. "And if the future me sent them all back, it has to be okay, right?"

"We still don't know who it really was," Raye pointed out.

"So what can we do?" Lita frowned. "They're sure not all united themselves right now."

"They're splintered four ways," Mina agreed. "Maybe we have to try to help them be friends again?"

Lita scoffed. "Were they ever friends?"

"Before Beryl got a hold of them, yes, they were," Luna said. "Or they seemed to be, when we saw them with Endymion. He talked favorably about them, even Zoisite."

Serena frowned. "Luna . . . why didn't you ever talk about any of this?"

Luna sighed. "Artemis and I both agreed that they seemed to have been fully taken by Beryl and the Dark Kingdom. You girls already had so much to deal with and we didn't want to add more to your sorrows."

Artemis nodded. "Now, though . . . now it's different. Now you need to know."

"You know who else needs to know?!" Serena exclaimed, getting to her feet. "Darien! I'm going to tell him right now before anything else happens!"

No one stopped her. She was right; he certainly did deserve to know.

"Do you want me to come with you, Serena?" Luna asked.

"Yeah, that would be a good idea, when you remember and all," Serena said. "Maybe you should come too, Artemis."

"Maybe we should all go since we all have something to contribute," Raye said, standing up.

Normally Serena would scowl and complain about everyone inviting themselves on her date, but not now. "Yeah, let's let him know!" she declared. "Maybe he'll know what we should do next."

"He'll probably be just as confused as we are," Raye said. "What if his memories about them are starting to come back too?"

Serena's eyes widened. "That's all the more reason we need to go talk to him now! Come on, everyone!" She ran for the door.

The others all followed.