Disclaimer: I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho. *poses dramatically * But if I did.!
Oh, and Fangirlitis is my sister, so I don't own her either and I don't
want to.
A/n: To tiger of the fire: I'm sorry if you thought I was insulting you from the last quote, but as I stated in the E-mail and disclaimer, Fangirlitis is my sister. Speaking of her, you should read her fiction, A name. It's for Inu Yasha, and would be a lot worse if I didn't proofread it for her, But I have to do something nice for her birthday or I'm grounded. Guess a plug for her fic is better than nothing.
Yuske: Alright. To the few of you who decided to read the seventh chapter before the rest of the fic. well, that's a stupid idea. However, I have to narrate the last chapter for you simpletons or KKC will have my ass. *clears throat and pulls an index card out of his pocket * After a prank gone horribly wrong, the chase of the century ensue- the hell? What idiot wrote this junk?
Fangirlitis: * Raises hand* I was trying to improve my writing skills by adding a few adjectives and such and.
Yuske: * raises eyebrow and randomly shoots in Fangirlitis' general direction *
Fangirlitis: OW! Meanie! Prepare to face the wrath of.! TYLOR!!!! * starts to speak in a guy's voice, her eyes turn purple, and she is suddenly dressed all in black and chains * DIE MORTAL! DIE! *Shoots lightning bolts at Yuske, who is cowering underneath a figurative table *
KKC: *walks in to find her room even more of a mess * The hell? Fangirlitis!
Fangirlitis/ Tylor: I'M TYLOR, YOU SARCASTIC FURBALL!
KKC: I don't give a rat's ass who you are, just get the **** off my computer!!!!! And leave Yuske alone! *Yuske gives her the peace sign from underneath the figurative table*
Fangirlitis: *Turns back to normal * No fair! You won't let me have any fun! You won't even let me kill Kurama!
KKC: No. really? Why would you? Kurama rules! (Even though Genkai is way cooler! And Jin is even better ^_^)
Fangirlitis: Foxes are evil. ALL FOXES MUST DIE!!!!!! * KKC gives her a running kick in the @$$ *
KKC: Animal hater! Be gone and let the poor readers be! *Drags Fangirlitis out of her room*
Fangirlitis: I WILL get reviewers! Watch me! I will! Then who will be doing who's grunt-work? You will spell-check and review everything that I write! You will get me coffee at six AM! You will let me have Hiei all to myself! You will- * Yuske knocks her unconscious *
Yuske: Where should I put her?
KKC: Basement will be fine. ACK! I just wasted over a page writing all that! Stupid sister. always wasting my time. Oh! Almost forgot the quote of the week! Oops.
Quote of the week: "Well, all I have to say to all you men out there is; I'm sorry. The battle of the sexes is over, we lost."
-Rex Havery
Chapter seven: Man-eating plants and pitfalls
"No way! Someone broke in? But how?" Yuske questioned Hiei. The fire demon shrugged and continued to eat his breakfast. "Well, the bloke didn't force th' lock." Jin said, the now disassembled doorknob and lock in hand. Lyra stopped scrubbing some of the dirty dishes that had piled up since late last night and asked Hiei for details. "What was the guy's name?" Hiei washed down his hash browns with a gulp of OJ before replying, "The twerp's name was Rogerik." Kuwabara nudged Bones away from the trashcan and scraped the scrambled egg off of his plate. "Man, I feel sorry for that kid. Having a name like that and being a kleptomaniac-" Lark's face paled and she grabbed Hiei by the collar of his black, hooded sweatshirt (Koenma made Hiei go shopping for "normal" clothes so he would fit in at school.). "Are you sure it was Rogerik? Not, like, Ricardo or Rob?"
"Yes, it was Rogerik." Hiei calmly removed Lark's hand from his throat. Yuske asked Lark, "Why would that matter? What's with this guy that you don't like?" Lark shook her head at the teen in a pitied manner. "He was the worst. Always breaking into the girls dorms and scaring us. Taking candid photos (Embarrassing, not revealing. I.E.: Drooling, pillow fights, makeovers gone horribly wrong, pranks, and pages out of their diaries.) and selling them online." Lark visibly shuddered and continued. "Messing the place up, playing pranks on us, and he was always trying to flirt if he was caught. Oh, his pick-up lines were the worst."
*Flashback to last year during girl's-night-out. The students are just getting back to their dorms *
Student #1: Hey, did you hear that?
Holly: Yeah. Jeez.he's back, isn't he?
Student #2: Rogerik? EeeeEEeeeeew.I hope not.
Lark: * forces open the pantry door * Oh no! Not you! *Rogerik waves hello, but falls over onto Lark *
Rogerik: I'm so sorry! Are you okay?!?
Lark: Yeah, I think so. Nothing's broken, at least.
Rogerik: I'm glad, 'cause it must've hurt falling from heaven.
Lark: *slaps Rogerik and storms off * Loser!
*Lark snaps outta La-la land *
"Geez. He really was bad, wasn't he?" Yuske asked, snapping Lark out of Flashback mode. "Uh-huh. I'm sure Hiei scared him off, though." Lark nodded in Hiei's direction. Hiei dumped his plate in with the other dishes. "Sure I did. Threatened his pathetic life if he ever came back." Jin shook his head. "No offense, Hiei. But isn't that, I don' know. kind of extreme?" Holly walked into the kitchen with Kyuro draped on her shoulders and yawning. "Is what too extreme?" She asked while rubbing her bleary eyes. Yuske replied, "Threatening this kid named Rogerik." Holly immediately snapped to attention mid-yawn and was almost strangling Yuske before he could react. "No! It's not too extreme! I don't want to ever see him again!" Kyuro arched his back and hissed at the volume of his owner's voice, and ran off to go bug the gorging Salvatore. "In fact, I'll make sure he doesn't even get to the front door!" Holly purposely strode back upstairs to change her clothes and plot her evil scheme. Lark and Lyra waved to the boys and ran up to Lyra's room. "There's no way I'm letting Holly have all the fun! See you later!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Okay, so we're going to plant a few traps and let Hiei do the dirty work, right?" Holly asked. "But I wanna drop him in a pit with ravenous Tiger sharks!" Lark whined. Lyra shrugged and grabbed one of Holly's numerous bucket hats and flipped it upside down on the bed. "Alright, this is what we're gonna do! Write down your preferred form of torture on a slip of paper and I'll pick a slip from the hat. Just don't try to kill him. Lark." The younger Admarant sister groaned, but wrote down her idea on a slip of paper and tossed it in the hat. Holly tossed in her idea and patiently waited as Lyra made a big show of pulling out one of the two slips. "And the winner is. Holly! Let's go booby trap the front yard and garden!"
Lyra waited outside the green house until Kurama decided to take a break from his work and she could sneak in. Gazing at the wall of seed bins, she walked over to the fast-growing section and quickly thrust a few handfuls of the more deadly varieties into her pocket. Whistling innocently, she strolled outside and over to where Lark and Holly were carefully hiding ankle traps and a large, six by ten hole about twelve feet deep. "What did you get?" Lark asked her sister, whom produced the seeds and sorted them out. "These are Solar Creepers, this is a Carrion Vine, here's some Purple Snipers.and I have no idea what this is." Holly nodded approvingly. "Nasty. Those plants will give that jerk a cruel little surprise."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Is it me, or do those three look like they're up to something?" Yuske asked aloud. "Hm. they're always getting into trouble. One time they brought a clutch of Cockatrice eggs back home. took me forever to make the remedy." Erika said as she knitted in her old rocking chair. Kuwabara looked up from the TV long enough to remark, "Maybe it's about that Rogerik guy. They don't really like him." Bones lifted his head from his master's lap to clack in agreement. "See. Even the dog thinks so." Yuske shook his head at the redhead's stupidity. "Kuwabara, the dog's dead. How can he agree to anything?" Bones fell onto the floor and trotted over to Yuske. "What do you want, mutt?" Bones raised his hackles and went into attack position before latching onto Yuske's ankle. Kuwabara's laughter was heard throughout the house. "Hah! Serves you right, Urameshi!"
Upstairs in the boy's room, Hiei sharpened and polished the blade of his katana. He carefully inspected it and decided to test it out. Target number one: Kuwabara's retarded cow clock. He had no idea how it had withstood the beatings of almost everyone in the house, but if his sword could even scratch its vile ceramic surface, he would be quite satisfied with his work. Lifting the sword high over his head for a crushing blow, he slammed it down, hard. The sword impacted with the clock and managed to chip away a few flakes of paint before it flew out of his hands and almost impaled the reading Kurama. The kitsune calmly jerked the blade out of the wall and tossed it out of the open window. Hiei scrabbled to catch it, but was too late. "Baka kitsune." He grumbled. "What was that for?" Kurama flipped a page and continued reading. "You shouldn't be destroying other people's property." Hiei "Hn"-ed and went outside to sulk.
As soon as Hiei slammed the door behind him, Kurama marked his place and hurried over to Yuske's PS2. Smirking, he put in Dead or Alive Beach Volleyball 2 in and started to play through the story mode. Technically, he wasn't a fan of such games, but the youko was starting to get out more often then normal lately. He was constantly straining to hear anyone come upstairs as he managed to win game after game with his bikini-clad character. If the guys knew he was a Video game-aholic, they would never let him know the end of it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Down in his basement room, Jin tried to start up the computer. As a Shinobi, he never had much use for technology, but times were changing and the Shinobi couldn't stay technophobic forever. Besides, those games Kuwabara and Yuske played looked like fun. The computer booted up quickly enough, and Jin was thrilled to discover he had Kazaa and Internet access on it. Clicking on a few more icons, he brought up the home site to an online game called Dark Age that the previous owner must've played before leaving. Jin soon created his own online account as "Kaze_demon@AOL.com (It's a fake screen-name people, but Kaze is his real last name. I think it means twister or something.) and decided to look around Kazaa to download some music files. There was a certain band he had heard a lot of lately called Simple Plan. Even the girls, all three of them, played their CDs. Lark even had a Simple Plan scrapbook she had been putting together for over a year now.
While the songs slowly downloaded, Jin decided he would go explore the grounds a bit. Stetching a tad, he changed out of his Shinobi outfit and into a pair of jeans and a tank top. It would be easier for him to walk and fit in for once. Maybe he could even make a few friends for once.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Finally, after working non-stop for seven hours, the girls looked with admiration at their work. As the light sea breeze ruffled the leaves on the plum tree and their hair, Lyra grinned and said, "It looks so innocent and peaceful here.they'll never know what hit them!" The three of them looked at each other and started cackling insanely. They weren't called "The Coven" for nothing.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Yuske grumbled and groaned at his task, but decided it would be better to deliver Erika's letter to his astrology teacher, Ryo(Does anyone remember him?! How quickly a weekend without a school-atmosphere can rot your memory. It was only a three-chapter weekend for Chrissakes! ), than sweep the house. As he wearily trudged up to the drafty tower, he was surprised to find Jin hanging out with some of the better-known students. Lyonell was quite the joker, and his twin sister, Chrysanthemum (*groan* What a long name for such a minor character.) was always studying. Yuske had heard that the two cat-demons were in Kurama's class and had almost caused their Venusian thingamajigs grow at twice the normal rate. Lyonell called Yuske over.
"Hi! What are you doing out at six in the evening? Don't you know that's against "School Rules"?" The tanned demon joked, knowing fully well no one followed the curfew on weekends. "Delivering a letter for Erika. Could I ask you a question, Lyonell?" Lyonell shrugged. "Didn't give me a choice, did ya, buddy? But, sure. Why not?" Yuske raised an eyebrow at the cat's attitude, but continued anyways. "Lyra, Lark, and Holly keep talking about this guy that broke into our dorm last night. I think his name was Rogerik. d'ya know anything about him?" Lyonell was about to respond, but his sister cut him off. "You don't mean Rogerik Lewis, do you? Ooh. He was a complete ass. Always showing off with his PK and trying to flirt with the girls. I didn't think he would come back this year after Lark totally humiliated him Last August." Jin looked a tad puzzled. "PK?" he asked. Chrysanthemum sighed and explained in perfect dictionary text, "PK, Psychokinetic power. The ability to move things with your mind. Rogerik is psychic and he breaks into houses and other locked obstructions using his abilities as a hobby." The three boys just stared. "Oh." They replied, in unison.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Kurama heard someone coming upstairs and start to turn the doorknob and managed to turn off the system and TV, and rush over to his bed seconds before Hiei entered. The temperamental demon just stood in the doorway and looked over the room before asking, "What's up with you, fox?" Kurama shrugged from behind the thick novel he had hastily picked up and said, "Nothing. What are you doing up here?" Hiei "Hn"-ed and grabbed his katana from under his bed before stalking downstairs.
Peeking to make sure Hiei really was gone, Kurama reached under his pillow to grab his new Gameboy Advance SP. Flipping the power switch, Kurama went out to save the continent of Blue Moon with grim determination.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Lyra happily whistled as she took the marinated pork roast out of the fridge and popped it in the oven with a dozen foil-wrapped potatoes. Lark was busy typing up a new chapter for her fanfiction in the dining room. Story webs, character profiles, and previous chapters were strewn around her and her laptop. Hiei quietly strolled down the stairs with his katana sheathed at his side. "Why are you so happy?" He asked the cooking Lyra, who just shrugged and shooed her sister off to the living room to write. "Whatever. I gonna be out for a while." Lark set the table and said, "Why should I care? It's not like I'm your keeper." Salvatore was on his usual perch by the table and flew onto his owner's head. Lyra continued to set the table as if nothing had happened. Hiei sighed and was about to step out the door when Lyra stopped him. "Do you want me to set a plate aside for you?" Hiei dolefully grinned and nodded. "Sure. why not? See you later."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Almost eight, time for them to have dinner and chill out before going to bed at ten. Rogerik was curious as to what the five, newer students were doing in the same dorm as his former targets. Lyra's older than I am, and I hear she's going for this Kurama guy. Rogerik thought. Holly's familiar, Kyuro, scares the hell outta me. I hate cats. So that leaves Lark. just great. If anything, Rogerik didn't want a challenge as hard as getting Lark to fall for him. The boys in his own dorms were tired of hearing about his PK and wanted him to show them. But was unlocking a simple box good enough? Noooooo. they wanted him to break into the most heavily guarded building in the entire goddamn school. Oh well. he would wait.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hiei sat outside on the cliff-side stairs, watching the waves beat on the rocky shoreline. Gulls screamed overhead and he caught a quick glimpse of a pelican in the middle of a kamikaze dive (I've seen them dive down. they're fast. *shudders* Damn, they're scary when they do that. Imagine if they went after people instead of fish. Whoah! I just got an awesome idea for a horror fic! *snickers evilly *) . He was about to circle the perimeter of the dorm once again when the sweet sound of a flute rose above the sound of the waves and wind, soon followed by another flute of some sort and a violin. The song was sweet and soft, gently rocking the tired demon to sleep in a haunting lullaby.
Hiei awoke with a start, and gazed about in a mild stupor before realizing he was sprawled out on the stairs outside. The sun had totally set and an old screech owl hooted in the distance. He groggily stood up and tried to make his way back to the yard, but tripped over a loose stone that sent him sprawling to the dirt. Staring at the vast expanse of distance before him and the front door, he loathed the idea of trying to move. That damn music, he thought, Must've affected my senses somehow.
Something in the bushes moved. Even amid all the junk going through his head and his condition, Hiei managed to make out the intruder as a possible threat. Griping about the stupid habits of ningens worldwide, Hiei stood up on his feet, using his sheathed sword like a sort of awkward cane, and hobbled a few feet forward in order to get a better view. A boy silently ran over to the front door and started to stroke the lock. What an idiot. An annoyed Hiei thought, Who would be able to open a door like that...? Even as he thought out the words in his head, he slowly snapped back to attention. "In all of Seven Hells." Hiei cursed under his breath, straightening up and clearing the fog from his head.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Holly sat on Lyra's balcony reading a book while the other two slept. She was supposed to be on the lookout for Rogerik, but who in their right mind would come back after Hiei threatened their life? Definitely not her. but Rogerik wasn't in his right mind. Any normal boy would give up trying to flirt after being rejected for the fifth time, but not Rogerik. Not to give him any credit, but the boy was quite stubborn.
It was getting quite late, and all was quiet. Too quiet. Putting her book down for a minute, she grabbed a pair of headphones attached to a satellite dish and listened in for even the minutest sound. Wind blew, a lone familiar yowled out an ear-splitting serenade, and twigs snapped under the foot of the intruder. It was midnight, to the exact minute. Rogerik had a knack for being exactly on time, and tonight was no different. Throwing the contraption onto the balcony floor, Holly snuck over to the sleeping sisters and gently shook them awake. "Wake up you guys," She said. "It's show time."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Snapping back to his senses, Hiei carefully leapt up onto a gnarled branch of the re- grown plum tree to watch his prey. Rogerik was cocky, and sure to make a mistake sooner or later. As the other student worked on breaking in, Hiei made himself comfortable. Apparently, the girls had put many spirit bonds on the lock and were not ready to risk letting the boy in. The strength was amazing, even between the three, Hiei hadn't sensed this much power. It was gonna be a long night.
Hiei clutched the branch in front of him. He had almost fallen asleep while watching Rogerik disassemble the magical locks, and was glad to see he wouldn't have to wait much longer. The blonde psychic wiped his brow, obviously concentrating very hard as he broke through the last lock, and Hiei saw the look of achievement on his face before a klaxon alarm sounded. In panic, Rogerik stepped backwards and tripped over a wire that had sprung up and surrounded the entire house.
The rogue sprang back to his feet and tried to get the hell out of there, stumbling and tripping over various plants and obstacles in his path. In a manner of seconds, Rogerik was strapped to the ground by thorn vines. The plum tree lurched, and Hiei jumped out to watch from the sidelines, with mischievous curiosity, as it pelted Rogerik with unripe plums. Meanwhile, a string of curses in about three different languages flew from the youth's mouth as thorns pricked him and drew blood. Flowers bloomed and quickly died, releasing the foulest stench Hiei could imagine. The girls had done well in pinning Rogerik down, now all that was left was to kill him.
As much as he hated to make Rogerik's end short and sweet when he was having so much fun watching the little maggot suffer, Hiei relished the thought of the kill even more and drew his katana. Quietly, he strode forwards, the slender blade in front of him, and prepared to deliver the final blow upon the speechless (and now shitless) boy, when the ground beneath him collapsed. "Shit!" Hiei cursed as he landed most ungracefully on his rear in the dank pit. Vines shot up from the ground and wrapped around his arms and legs before he could respond. Another vine reared up, and grew along the sides of the dark hole, and eventually over the sides, before growing tiny, purple, flower blossoms. These flowers opened up magnificently, and put even Kurama's roses to shame with their beauty and sweet perfume. Hiei sat there, transfixed by the gorgeous flowers and wondering why the pistil was tipped like a barb.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~It seemed that the alarm had even penetrated the five-foot thick walls of Jin's basement bedroom and woken up Kuwabara. Now that's a burglar alarm. Yuske tossed and turned in his bed for a little while before finally giving up and trudging downstairs, Kuwabara not far behind. Kurama was already downstairs with a groggy Jin and hysterical Rachel. Yuske asked what was happening, but was only replied by a grunt from the wind manipulator. Kurama tried to explain as best as he could, but Yuske wasn't in the mood for a lecture about what the fox didn't know. Rachel stormed outside in a huff, closely followed by the curious boys, to stop whomever was responsible for such a mess.
Not even five feet from the doorway, Rachel was snapped up by her ankle and was hanging upside-down, trying to keep her tee shirt from slipping down in mid-rant. Grimacing, Lyra whispered to her comrades, "Not good. Ooh. we're in for it now." Lark and Holly nodded their heads in perfect unison, still rather amused at their roommate's reactions to the calamity going on in the middle of the night. Yuske seemed to wake up at the reality of the event while watching his enraged teacher hanging by her feet from the roof, and soon noticed a pale and bloody Rogerik bound to the ground with thorns. Jin's eyes widened at the scene and he cautiously tip-toed around the yard in order to spot anymore booby traps. Kurama, on the other hand, had found Hiei in a pit with a particularly murderous Purple Sniper, and was busy killing the deadly plant off.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~"LARK! LYRA! HOLLY! When I find you girls, you are in serious trouble!" Rachel screamed at the top of her lungs, towards Lyra's balcony. Lark and Holly had wisely snuck back into their rooms and Lyra had shut the french-style doors that led to her balcony.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Argh! It took me all week to write that! I almost thought I wouldn't finish it in time. If I continue at this rate of pages per chapter I could have a short novel by the time I'm done. I've webbed out the nest ten or so chapters, so writers block won't really be a problem. With the entire idea of the storyline of this fic, I'm guessing that it could last for almost 20 chapters. Don't worry! I'll write them. eventually!
At my local Boys and Girls club, I was doing a mural with Fangirlitis and our friend Jesica (That's how you actually spell her name, its not a typo.). I managed to talk Fangirlitis into putting Jin from Yu Yu Hakusho on it instead of a leprechaun (hey, no one will ever know. The room the mural is in is for kids 8 and younger.), and in my opinion, Jin is way better. Besides, if I had to draw a leprechaun, it would end up looking like the one in the self-titled horror movie "Leprechaun". Um. not a good idea for little kids. I scare them enough as it is.
Not much else has happened, amd it doesn't look like things are going to pick up soon, so bye.
KKC
A/n: To tiger of the fire: I'm sorry if you thought I was insulting you from the last quote, but as I stated in the E-mail and disclaimer, Fangirlitis is my sister. Speaking of her, you should read her fiction, A name. It's for Inu Yasha, and would be a lot worse if I didn't proofread it for her, But I have to do something nice for her birthday or I'm grounded. Guess a plug for her fic is better than nothing.
Yuske: Alright. To the few of you who decided to read the seventh chapter before the rest of the fic. well, that's a stupid idea. However, I have to narrate the last chapter for you simpletons or KKC will have my ass. *clears throat and pulls an index card out of his pocket * After a prank gone horribly wrong, the chase of the century ensue- the hell? What idiot wrote this junk?
Fangirlitis: * Raises hand* I was trying to improve my writing skills by adding a few adjectives and such and.
Yuske: * raises eyebrow and randomly shoots in Fangirlitis' general direction *
Fangirlitis: OW! Meanie! Prepare to face the wrath of.! TYLOR!!!! * starts to speak in a guy's voice, her eyes turn purple, and she is suddenly dressed all in black and chains * DIE MORTAL! DIE! *Shoots lightning bolts at Yuske, who is cowering underneath a figurative table *
KKC: *walks in to find her room even more of a mess * The hell? Fangirlitis!
Fangirlitis/ Tylor: I'M TYLOR, YOU SARCASTIC FURBALL!
KKC: I don't give a rat's ass who you are, just get the **** off my computer!!!!! And leave Yuske alone! *Yuske gives her the peace sign from underneath the figurative table*
Fangirlitis: *Turns back to normal * No fair! You won't let me have any fun! You won't even let me kill Kurama!
KKC: No. really? Why would you? Kurama rules! (Even though Genkai is way cooler! And Jin is even better ^_^)
Fangirlitis: Foxes are evil. ALL FOXES MUST DIE!!!!!! * KKC gives her a running kick in the @$$ *
KKC: Animal hater! Be gone and let the poor readers be! *Drags Fangirlitis out of her room*
Fangirlitis: I WILL get reviewers! Watch me! I will! Then who will be doing who's grunt-work? You will spell-check and review everything that I write! You will get me coffee at six AM! You will let me have Hiei all to myself! You will- * Yuske knocks her unconscious *
Yuske: Where should I put her?
KKC: Basement will be fine. ACK! I just wasted over a page writing all that! Stupid sister. always wasting my time. Oh! Almost forgot the quote of the week! Oops.
Quote of the week: "Well, all I have to say to all you men out there is; I'm sorry. The battle of the sexes is over, we lost."
-Rex Havery
Chapter seven: Man-eating plants and pitfalls
"No way! Someone broke in? But how?" Yuske questioned Hiei. The fire demon shrugged and continued to eat his breakfast. "Well, the bloke didn't force th' lock." Jin said, the now disassembled doorknob and lock in hand. Lyra stopped scrubbing some of the dirty dishes that had piled up since late last night and asked Hiei for details. "What was the guy's name?" Hiei washed down his hash browns with a gulp of OJ before replying, "The twerp's name was Rogerik." Kuwabara nudged Bones away from the trashcan and scraped the scrambled egg off of his plate. "Man, I feel sorry for that kid. Having a name like that and being a kleptomaniac-" Lark's face paled and she grabbed Hiei by the collar of his black, hooded sweatshirt (Koenma made Hiei go shopping for "normal" clothes so he would fit in at school.). "Are you sure it was Rogerik? Not, like, Ricardo or Rob?"
"Yes, it was Rogerik." Hiei calmly removed Lark's hand from his throat. Yuske asked Lark, "Why would that matter? What's with this guy that you don't like?" Lark shook her head at the teen in a pitied manner. "He was the worst. Always breaking into the girls dorms and scaring us. Taking candid photos (Embarrassing, not revealing. I.E.: Drooling, pillow fights, makeovers gone horribly wrong, pranks, and pages out of their diaries.) and selling them online." Lark visibly shuddered and continued. "Messing the place up, playing pranks on us, and he was always trying to flirt if he was caught. Oh, his pick-up lines were the worst."
*Flashback to last year during girl's-night-out. The students are just getting back to their dorms *
Student #1: Hey, did you hear that?
Holly: Yeah. Jeez.he's back, isn't he?
Student #2: Rogerik? EeeeEEeeeeew.I hope not.
Lark: * forces open the pantry door * Oh no! Not you! *Rogerik waves hello, but falls over onto Lark *
Rogerik: I'm so sorry! Are you okay?!?
Lark: Yeah, I think so. Nothing's broken, at least.
Rogerik: I'm glad, 'cause it must've hurt falling from heaven.
Lark: *slaps Rogerik and storms off * Loser!
*Lark snaps outta La-la land *
"Geez. He really was bad, wasn't he?" Yuske asked, snapping Lark out of Flashback mode. "Uh-huh. I'm sure Hiei scared him off, though." Lark nodded in Hiei's direction. Hiei dumped his plate in with the other dishes. "Sure I did. Threatened his pathetic life if he ever came back." Jin shook his head. "No offense, Hiei. But isn't that, I don' know. kind of extreme?" Holly walked into the kitchen with Kyuro draped on her shoulders and yawning. "Is what too extreme?" She asked while rubbing her bleary eyes. Yuske replied, "Threatening this kid named Rogerik." Holly immediately snapped to attention mid-yawn and was almost strangling Yuske before he could react. "No! It's not too extreme! I don't want to ever see him again!" Kyuro arched his back and hissed at the volume of his owner's voice, and ran off to go bug the gorging Salvatore. "In fact, I'll make sure he doesn't even get to the front door!" Holly purposely strode back upstairs to change her clothes and plot her evil scheme. Lark and Lyra waved to the boys and ran up to Lyra's room. "There's no way I'm letting Holly have all the fun! See you later!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Okay, so we're going to plant a few traps and let Hiei do the dirty work, right?" Holly asked. "But I wanna drop him in a pit with ravenous Tiger sharks!" Lark whined. Lyra shrugged and grabbed one of Holly's numerous bucket hats and flipped it upside down on the bed. "Alright, this is what we're gonna do! Write down your preferred form of torture on a slip of paper and I'll pick a slip from the hat. Just don't try to kill him. Lark." The younger Admarant sister groaned, but wrote down her idea on a slip of paper and tossed it in the hat. Holly tossed in her idea and patiently waited as Lyra made a big show of pulling out one of the two slips. "And the winner is. Holly! Let's go booby trap the front yard and garden!"
Lyra waited outside the green house until Kurama decided to take a break from his work and she could sneak in. Gazing at the wall of seed bins, she walked over to the fast-growing section and quickly thrust a few handfuls of the more deadly varieties into her pocket. Whistling innocently, she strolled outside and over to where Lark and Holly were carefully hiding ankle traps and a large, six by ten hole about twelve feet deep. "What did you get?" Lark asked her sister, whom produced the seeds and sorted them out. "These are Solar Creepers, this is a Carrion Vine, here's some Purple Snipers.and I have no idea what this is." Holly nodded approvingly. "Nasty. Those plants will give that jerk a cruel little surprise."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Is it me, or do those three look like they're up to something?" Yuske asked aloud. "Hm. they're always getting into trouble. One time they brought a clutch of Cockatrice eggs back home. took me forever to make the remedy." Erika said as she knitted in her old rocking chair. Kuwabara looked up from the TV long enough to remark, "Maybe it's about that Rogerik guy. They don't really like him." Bones lifted his head from his master's lap to clack in agreement. "See. Even the dog thinks so." Yuske shook his head at the redhead's stupidity. "Kuwabara, the dog's dead. How can he agree to anything?" Bones fell onto the floor and trotted over to Yuske. "What do you want, mutt?" Bones raised his hackles and went into attack position before latching onto Yuske's ankle. Kuwabara's laughter was heard throughout the house. "Hah! Serves you right, Urameshi!"
Upstairs in the boy's room, Hiei sharpened and polished the blade of his katana. He carefully inspected it and decided to test it out. Target number one: Kuwabara's retarded cow clock. He had no idea how it had withstood the beatings of almost everyone in the house, but if his sword could even scratch its vile ceramic surface, he would be quite satisfied with his work. Lifting the sword high over his head for a crushing blow, he slammed it down, hard. The sword impacted with the clock and managed to chip away a few flakes of paint before it flew out of his hands and almost impaled the reading Kurama. The kitsune calmly jerked the blade out of the wall and tossed it out of the open window. Hiei scrabbled to catch it, but was too late. "Baka kitsune." He grumbled. "What was that for?" Kurama flipped a page and continued reading. "You shouldn't be destroying other people's property." Hiei "Hn"-ed and went outside to sulk.
As soon as Hiei slammed the door behind him, Kurama marked his place and hurried over to Yuske's PS2. Smirking, he put in Dead or Alive Beach Volleyball 2 in and started to play through the story mode. Technically, he wasn't a fan of such games, but the youko was starting to get out more often then normal lately. He was constantly straining to hear anyone come upstairs as he managed to win game after game with his bikini-clad character. If the guys knew he was a Video game-aholic, they would never let him know the end of it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Down in his basement room, Jin tried to start up the computer. As a Shinobi, he never had much use for technology, but times were changing and the Shinobi couldn't stay technophobic forever. Besides, those games Kuwabara and Yuske played looked like fun. The computer booted up quickly enough, and Jin was thrilled to discover he had Kazaa and Internet access on it. Clicking on a few more icons, he brought up the home site to an online game called Dark Age that the previous owner must've played before leaving. Jin soon created his own online account as "Kaze_demon@AOL.com (It's a fake screen-name people, but Kaze is his real last name. I think it means twister or something.) and decided to look around Kazaa to download some music files. There was a certain band he had heard a lot of lately called Simple Plan. Even the girls, all three of them, played their CDs. Lark even had a Simple Plan scrapbook she had been putting together for over a year now.
While the songs slowly downloaded, Jin decided he would go explore the grounds a bit. Stetching a tad, he changed out of his Shinobi outfit and into a pair of jeans and a tank top. It would be easier for him to walk and fit in for once. Maybe he could even make a few friends for once.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Finally, after working non-stop for seven hours, the girls looked with admiration at their work. As the light sea breeze ruffled the leaves on the plum tree and their hair, Lyra grinned and said, "It looks so innocent and peaceful here.they'll never know what hit them!" The three of them looked at each other and started cackling insanely. They weren't called "The Coven" for nothing.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Yuske grumbled and groaned at his task, but decided it would be better to deliver Erika's letter to his astrology teacher, Ryo(Does anyone remember him?! How quickly a weekend without a school-atmosphere can rot your memory. It was only a three-chapter weekend for Chrissakes! ), than sweep the house. As he wearily trudged up to the drafty tower, he was surprised to find Jin hanging out with some of the better-known students. Lyonell was quite the joker, and his twin sister, Chrysanthemum (*groan* What a long name for such a minor character.) was always studying. Yuske had heard that the two cat-demons were in Kurama's class and had almost caused their Venusian thingamajigs grow at twice the normal rate. Lyonell called Yuske over.
"Hi! What are you doing out at six in the evening? Don't you know that's against "School Rules"?" The tanned demon joked, knowing fully well no one followed the curfew on weekends. "Delivering a letter for Erika. Could I ask you a question, Lyonell?" Lyonell shrugged. "Didn't give me a choice, did ya, buddy? But, sure. Why not?" Yuske raised an eyebrow at the cat's attitude, but continued anyways. "Lyra, Lark, and Holly keep talking about this guy that broke into our dorm last night. I think his name was Rogerik. d'ya know anything about him?" Lyonell was about to respond, but his sister cut him off. "You don't mean Rogerik Lewis, do you? Ooh. He was a complete ass. Always showing off with his PK and trying to flirt with the girls. I didn't think he would come back this year after Lark totally humiliated him Last August." Jin looked a tad puzzled. "PK?" he asked. Chrysanthemum sighed and explained in perfect dictionary text, "PK, Psychokinetic power. The ability to move things with your mind. Rogerik is psychic and he breaks into houses and other locked obstructions using his abilities as a hobby." The three boys just stared. "Oh." They replied, in unison.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Kurama heard someone coming upstairs and start to turn the doorknob and managed to turn off the system and TV, and rush over to his bed seconds before Hiei entered. The temperamental demon just stood in the doorway and looked over the room before asking, "What's up with you, fox?" Kurama shrugged from behind the thick novel he had hastily picked up and said, "Nothing. What are you doing up here?" Hiei "Hn"-ed and grabbed his katana from under his bed before stalking downstairs.
Peeking to make sure Hiei really was gone, Kurama reached under his pillow to grab his new Gameboy Advance SP. Flipping the power switch, Kurama went out to save the continent of Blue Moon with grim determination.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Lyra happily whistled as she took the marinated pork roast out of the fridge and popped it in the oven with a dozen foil-wrapped potatoes. Lark was busy typing up a new chapter for her fanfiction in the dining room. Story webs, character profiles, and previous chapters were strewn around her and her laptop. Hiei quietly strolled down the stairs with his katana sheathed at his side. "Why are you so happy?" He asked the cooking Lyra, who just shrugged and shooed her sister off to the living room to write. "Whatever. I gonna be out for a while." Lark set the table and said, "Why should I care? It's not like I'm your keeper." Salvatore was on his usual perch by the table and flew onto his owner's head. Lyra continued to set the table as if nothing had happened. Hiei sighed and was about to step out the door when Lyra stopped him. "Do you want me to set a plate aside for you?" Hiei dolefully grinned and nodded. "Sure. why not? See you later."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Almost eight, time for them to have dinner and chill out before going to bed at ten. Rogerik was curious as to what the five, newer students were doing in the same dorm as his former targets. Lyra's older than I am, and I hear she's going for this Kurama guy. Rogerik thought. Holly's familiar, Kyuro, scares the hell outta me. I hate cats. So that leaves Lark. just great. If anything, Rogerik didn't want a challenge as hard as getting Lark to fall for him. The boys in his own dorms were tired of hearing about his PK and wanted him to show them. But was unlocking a simple box good enough? Noooooo. they wanted him to break into the most heavily guarded building in the entire goddamn school. Oh well. he would wait.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hiei sat outside on the cliff-side stairs, watching the waves beat on the rocky shoreline. Gulls screamed overhead and he caught a quick glimpse of a pelican in the middle of a kamikaze dive (I've seen them dive down. they're fast. *shudders* Damn, they're scary when they do that. Imagine if they went after people instead of fish. Whoah! I just got an awesome idea for a horror fic! *snickers evilly *) . He was about to circle the perimeter of the dorm once again when the sweet sound of a flute rose above the sound of the waves and wind, soon followed by another flute of some sort and a violin. The song was sweet and soft, gently rocking the tired demon to sleep in a haunting lullaby.
Hiei awoke with a start, and gazed about in a mild stupor before realizing he was sprawled out on the stairs outside. The sun had totally set and an old screech owl hooted in the distance. He groggily stood up and tried to make his way back to the yard, but tripped over a loose stone that sent him sprawling to the dirt. Staring at the vast expanse of distance before him and the front door, he loathed the idea of trying to move. That damn music, he thought, Must've affected my senses somehow.
Something in the bushes moved. Even amid all the junk going through his head and his condition, Hiei managed to make out the intruder as a possible threat. Griping about the stupid habits of ningens worldwide, Hiei stood up on his feet, using his sheathed sword like a sort of awkward cane, and hobbled a few feet forward in order to get a better view. A boy silently ran over to the front door and started to stroke the lock. What an idiot. An annoyed Hiei thought, Who would be able to open a door like that...? Even as he thought out the words in his head, he slowly snapped back to attention. "In all of Seven Hells." Hiei cursed under his breath, straightening up and clearing the fog from his head.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Holly sat on Lyra's balcony reading a book while the other two slept. She was supposed to be on the lookout for Rogerik, but who in their right mind would come back after Hiei threatened their life? Definitely not her. but Rogerik wasn't in his right mind. Any normal boy would give up trying to flirt after being rejected for the fifth time, but not Rogerik. Not to give him any credit, but the boy was quite stubborn.
It was getting quite late, and all was quiet. Too quiet. Putting her book down for a minute, she grabbed a pair of headphones attached to a satellite dish and listened in for even the minutest sound. Wind blew, a lone familiar yowled out an ear-splitting serenade, and twigs snapped under the foot of the intruder. It was midnight, to the exact minute. Rogerik had a knack for being exactly on time, and tonight was no different. Throwing the contraption onto the balcony floor, Holly snuck over to the sleeping sisters and gently shook them awake. "Wake up you guys," She said. "It's show time."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Snapping back to his senses, Hiei carefully leapt up onto a gnarled branch of the re- grown plum tree to watch his prey. Rogerik was cocky, and sure to make a mistake sooner or later. As the other student worked on breaking in, Hiei made himself comfortable. Apparently, the girls had put many spirit bonds on the lock and were not ready to risk letting the boy in. The strength was amazing, even between the three, Hiei hadn't sensed this much power. It was gonna be a long night.
Hiei clutched the branch in front of him. He had almost fallen asleep while watching Rogerik disassemble the magical locks, and was glad to see he wouldn't have to wait much longer. The blonde psychic wiped his brow, obviously concentrating very hard as he broke through the last lock, and Hiei saw the look of achievement on his face before a klaxon alarm sounded. In panic, Rogerik stepped backwards and tripped over a wire that had sprung up and surrounded the entire house.
The rogue sprang back to his feet and tried to get the hell out of there, stumbling and tripping over various plants and obstacles in his path. In a manner of seconds, Rogerik was strapped to the ground by thorn vines. The plum tree lurched, and Hiei jumped out to watch from the sidelines, with mischievous curiosity, as it pelted Rogerik with unripe plums. Meanwhile, a string of curses in about three different languages flew from the youth's mouth as thorns pricked him and drew blood. Flowers bloomed and quickly died, releasing the foulest stench Hiei could imagine. The girls had done well in pinning Rogerik down, now all that was left was to kill him.
As much as he hated to make Rogerik's end short and sweet when he was having so much fun watching the little maggot suffer, Hiei relished the thought of the kill even more and drew his katana. Quietly, he strode forwards, the slender blade in front of him, and prepared to deliver the final blow upon the speechless (and now shitless) boy, when the ground beneath him collapsed. "Shit!" Hiei cursed as he landed most ungracefully on his rear in the dank pit. Vines shot up from the ground and wrapped around his arms and legs before he could respond. Another vine reared up, and grew along the sides of the dark hole, and eventually over the sides, before growing tiny, purple, flower blossoms. These flowers opened up magnificently, and put even Kurama's roses to shame with their beauty and sweet perfume. Hiei sat there, transfixed by the gorgeous flowers and wondering why the pistil was tipped like a barb.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~It seemed that the alarm had even penetrated the five-foot thick walls of Jin's basement bedroom and woken up Kuwabara. Now that's a burglar alarm. Yuske tossed and turned in his bed for a little while before finally giving up and trudging downstairs, Kuwabara not far behind. Kurama was already downstairs with a groggy Jin and hysterical Rachel. Yuske asked what was happening, but was only replied by a grunt from the wind manipulator. Kurama tried to explain as best as he could, but Yuske wasn't in the mood for a lecture about what the fox didn't know. Rachel stormed outside in a huff, closely followed by the curious boys, to stop whomever was responsible for such a mess.
Not even five feet from the doorway, Rachel was snapped up by her ankle and was hanging upside-down, trying to keep her tee shirt from slipping down in mid-rant. Grimacing, Lyra whispered to her comrades, "Not good. Ooh. we're in for it now." Lark and Holly nodded their heads in perfect unison, still rather amused at their roommate's reactions to the calamity going on in the middle of the night. Yuske seemed to wake up at the reality of the event while watching his enraged teacher hanging by her feet from the roof, and soon noticed a pale and bloody Rogerik bound to the ground with thorns. Jin's eyes widened at the scene and he cautiously tip-toed around the yard in order to spot anymore booby traps. Kurama, on the other hand, had found Hiei in a pit with a particularly murderous Purple Sniper, and was busy killing the deadly plant off.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~"LARK! LYRA! HOLLY! When I find you girls, you are in serious trouble!" Rachel screamed at the top of her lungs, towards Lyra's balcony. Lark and Holly had wisely snuck back into their rooms and Lyra had shut the french-style doors that led to her balcony.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Argh! It took me all week to write that! I almost thought I wouldn't finish it in time. If I continue at this rate of pages per chapter I could have a short novel by the time I'm done. I've webbed out the nest ten or so chapters, so writers block won't really be a problem. With the entire idea of the storyline of this fic, I'm guessing that it could last for almost 20 chapters. Don't worry! I'll write them. eventually!
At my local Boys and Girls club, I was doing a mural with Fangirlitis and our friend Jesica (That's how you actually spell her name, its not a typo.). I managed to talk Fangirlitis into putting Jin from Yu Yu Hakusho on it instead of a leprechaun (hey, no one will ever know. The room the mural is in is for kids 8 and younger.), and in my opinion, Jin is way better. Besides, if I had to draw a leprechaun, it would end up looking like the one in the self-titled horror movie "Leprechaun". Um. not a good idea for little kids. I scare them enough as it is.
Not much else has happened, amd it doesn't look like things are going to pick up soon, so bye.
KKC