Chapter Eleven
Conflict
Tony awoke so sleepy and warm that he snuggled down deeper into the softness, unwilling to give up the comfort. Gradually however, his senses became aware one by one. The room seemed darker than it should be, and he could detect the faint aroma of vegetables and spices. There was a soothing, monotonous sound marring the stillness, but it wasn't the television that he was certain he'd left playing.
He opened his sticky eyes, blinking rapidly as he looked around in confusion. He'd fallen asleep on the couch in Gibbs living room while watching a movie on his boss' brand new tv – a tv that Gibbs had bought specifically for Tony's convalescence. It had definitely still been light outside while he'd been watching, however, and now he could see the twinkling of street lights through the darkened windows.
Glancing over at the clock, he could see it was after nine. He'd napped for a long time. He'd been doing much better, now only requiring the afternoon nap rather than several throughout the day. Still, he was frustrated by the nagging fatigue.
The house lights were all off, although there was a dim glow coming from the kitchen, and there was a knitted blanket draped over him. Gibbs had obviously come home from work, and that explained the monotonous sound. He was in the basement sanding his boat. Tony's expert nose smelled Minestrone soup bubbling on the stovetop.
Abby told Tony that when Gibbs had returned to work, he'd mentioned to Balboa that he was looking for a good soup recipe. Apparently, Tony's lack of appetite was really bothering him, and Kate was no longer around to provide her chicken soup. Tony would've enjoyed watching Gibbs attempting to make it, but it had proved unnecessary. Balboa had forwarded the request to some of the other cooks amongst the NCIS staff, and they'd responded above the call.
Gibbs' refrigerator was stocked with so many varied kinds of soups, there was no room for anything else. Tony had been both flustered and flattered by the response. He didn't realize how many of his fellow agents and co-workers seemed to care about what had happened to him, and he wondered how Kate would've reacted to it.
Probably say something snarky, yet still try to feed him. He suspected that a lot of his co-workers had pitched in as a way to honor Kate's memory. She'd been the one to take up the call last time, and this was a way to fill the gap from her loss. Law enforcement always watched out for the family of a fallen officer, and their little team was a family.
Tony's appetite wasn't nearly back to normal, and if he ever did crave something, it usually wasn't soup, but it was doing the job and his pants weren't all falling off him anymore. Truth be told however; he was growing really bored with his recuperation. It was nice to have access to all his beloved movies, but even he couldn't watch all day, every day.
NCIS had sprung for a visiting nurse to come in and check on Tony each day while Gibbs was at work. She put him through his breathing exercises, and they'd even started taking short walks around the neighborhood. It gave Tony someone to talk to during the day, even if she was only there for a couple hours. The rest of the time, Tony spent either watching tv, napping, or trying to sneak in more exercise.
He was really beginning to worry about passing his physical qualifications to return to work. He knew he wouldn't be able to get away with any shortcuts this time. And even though he hated desk duty, he thought the mental stimulation would be better than the amount of worrying he was doing about not being back at the office.
The sanding sound stopped, and he could hear Gibbs soft tread ascending the stairs. He sat up, pushing the blanket off and turned to face the basement door. When Gibbs peeked out, Tony felt a warmth coil in his chest knowing his boss had been keeping watch over him. Tony was still caught off guard by Gibbs softer side even though it had been a lot more present recently. He couldn't remember either of his parents paying much attention whether he'd been sick or not, so it was all new to him.
"I'm awake," he said unnecessarily.
"I can see that. You hungry?" Gibbs asked.
Tony shrugged, not wanting to admit that he wasn't. He knew Gibbs wasn't going to even consider letting him come back to work if he wasn't eating, but he couldn't muster any enthusiasm.
Gibbs frowned but walked into the kitchen, putting two bowls on the table, and filling them with the soup that had been warming on the stove. Tony followed, pulling a couple of beers out of the refrigerator, and sitting down across from Gibbs.
He cracked his beer and put his spoon in his soup, stirring the contents around and watching the steam spiral.
"Got a confession out of the wife today," Gibbs said, tucking in to his own dinner. They'd been working all week on a case of a murdered sailor.
"Told you the wife did it," Tony said, smirking.
"You always tell me the wife did it," Gibbs replied.
"Usually does," Tony said, shrugging.
"Yeah, well, the Courts want a little more than your say so. McGee seemed pleased to get out at a decent hour tonight," Gibbs said.
This intrigued Tony, and he perked up. "Yeah? You think he had a date? When would he have had the chance to meet someone? What about that new agent on Harrington's team, what's her name? Deidre? Diana? Something like that."
"You're asking me what someone's name is?" Gibbs asked, giving a half smile at the absurdity.
"Right. What was I thinking?" Tony asked, returning the grin.
"You know, that food's not going to do it's job if you don't actually put it in your mouth," Gibbs said, not looking at him as he continued to eat his own.
Tony sighed and shoveled up a spoonful, forcing it down. It wasn't bad, but like everything else he tried lately, sort of tasteless.
"You want something else?" Gibbs asked.
Tony shook his head, thinking this could be the moment to broach what he wanted to talk about. "No, it's fine. I'm just not doing enough to work up an appetite."
Gibbs sat back, his full attention on Tony. He took a long drink of his beer, but remained silent.
"What?" Tony asked, feeling nettled, which he was sure was exactly Gibbs' intention.
"Figured this would be coming soon. I'm surprised you didn't start the day I went back to work," Gibbs said.
Tony took a deep breath, steeling himself for what he was going to ask. "Knew I wasn't ready yet then," he said. "But I'm better now."
Gibbs looked pointedly at Tony's still full bowl of soup.
Tony took another mouthful. "You know Brad said the appetite would be the last thing to return, and I'm tired of soup. I'm bored, Gibbs. I need something to do," he said, meeting Gibbs eyes and trying to convey his desperation without sounding desperate.
Gibbs didn't say anything, but Tony could tell he was thinking about it, so he decided to press his point. "I'm much better than I was."
"You were sound asleep on the couch when I walked in here," Gibbs said, exasperated.
"Yeah, because I was bored. I've seen that movie before," Tony replied, which wasn't exactly true, but he had been bored along with his fatigue.
"What movie haven't you seen before?" Gibbs countered.
"Exactly. Anyone would be bored," Tony said, grinning. He knew he was winning – he could see through Gibbs' gruffness this time.
"I'll tell you what. You're going to stay home tomorrow, but over the weekend, if you can stay awake and eat something, you can start back on desk duty on Monday," Gibbs said firmly.
It was a fair deal, but Tony had been hoping for a straight-up affirmative, and his frustration bled through. "Everyone is so worried about the last time I ate, but no one seems to care that it's been longer since I got laid," he said, tossing his spoon down.
Gibbs reached around the table and tried to smack him on the back of his head, but Tony ducked out of the way this time. He supposed he deserved that one, but he wasn't ready to let go of his frustration.
"It's Monday or nothing," Gibbs said.
Tony reluctantly nodded, knowing he was being petulant but unable to stop it. It was only one more day, but he felt as if he'd been recuperating for months. He supposed he could ask Roberta, the nurse who'd been coming in each day, to extend their walk. That would take up some time, and he felt as if he could handle it. He wasn't certain Roberta could, however. For a nurse monitoring his health, she wasn't exactly in the best of shape. She was kind, however, and sympathetic to how much Tony hated the nebulizer treatments. She told him that one of her kids had asthma and hated the treatments just as much. Somehow, being compared to a little kid hadn't made him feel any better and actually a little ashamed of himself.
"Abby wants to visit," Gibbs said casually. "And don't even think that she's a solution to your lack of available women."
Tony frowned. "When? She was just here yesterday." Abby had been really good about stopping by and keeping Tony company, and she was always up for watching a flick or two with him. He'd never considered dating her, however. Never mind Rule Twelve, Tony had always thought dating anyone he had to work with on a regular basis was a bad idea. The eventual break-up made things much too complicated. Besides, he enjoyed their friendship and easy camaraderie too much to ever risk it.
"Apparently, she thinks you're lonely, so she's invited McGee, Ducky and his assistant over for a cook-out on Sunday," Gibbs said.
Even though he looked disgruntled, Tony could hear the softness in his voice. Abby would always get what she wanted where Gibbs was concerned.
"Jimmy Palmer," Tony said, automatically supplying the name. "He was here the day I came home."
"Yeah, him. Twitchy guy," Gibbs said.
Tony grinned. "I like him."
"Of course, you do. Talks too much, just like you," Gibbs said, beginning to clear their plates.
"I don't know, Gibbs. Ducky is certainly a loquacious chap; Abby and I never shut up; McGee can fill the silence if the topic is geeky enough, and now Jimmy? Seems to me, you surround yourself with talkative people so you don't have to say a word," Tony said, smirking.
"Yeah, well 'you're fired' is only two words, and I can manage that," Gibbs said, although Tony could see his lips twitching as he fought a smile.
Tony hadn't finished much of his soup, but he downed a good portion of his beer, figuring that would at least add calories.
Gibbs rolled his eyes. "Somehow, I don't think that's what Brad had in mind."
Tony grinned, tossing the empty cans in the trash. "What he doesn't know won't hurt him. So, who's cooking at this shindig of Abby's?"
Gibbs shrugged. "Just burgers – don't really require much of a cook."
"They do if you make them right. Add some onion and seasoning to the meat before grilling them, and it's a whole other taste," Tony said indignantly. He wasn't a huge cook – it always seemed too much effort for one – but he liked good food and knew how to prepare what he enjoyed.
"Guess you're cooking then. That's how you can keep yourself occupied tomorrow," Gibbs said, looking pleased with himself.
"How am I going to get the supplies I need?" Tony asked, warming to the idea. Gibbs had driven him here, and his own car was back at NCIS.
"Have Roberta take you when she stops by tomorrow," Gibbs had the ready answer.
"You're on – then you'll never think burgers don't require a cook again," Tony said, grinning.
/* /* /* /*
The day of the cookout dawned sunny and warm with the barest hint of a breeze wafting the smell of the summer blossoms across Gibbs' back yard. Gibbs had pulled out several chairs and some patio furniture that Tony hadn't even known he possessed. Like everything else Gibbs owned, the lawn furniture was all aged but kept in good condition. The two of them had placed it all in the back yard along with a grill.
Roberta had taken Tony shopping on Friday so he could purchase all his supplies, and he'd spent Saturday preparing what he could ahead of time. Without realizing it, the time had slipped away, and he'd even managed to eat more than half his dinner the night before. Abby had promised to supply the desserts, and everyone else said they'd contribute something.
Tony was really looking forward to it. It was almost like having a family, and he hadn't been to a cookout since his time in Baltimore. NCIS agents didn't seem to gather as much as most of the cops on various forces where he'd worked did. It was nice, and Tony hoped they might make it a summer tradition.
When he heard the door open, he knew without looking it would be Abby. Tony stood in the kitchen cutting fruit and placing it festively in a bowl.
"I'm here," Abby trilled, her feet clomping across the floor as she entered the kitchen. "Where's Gibbs?"
"Basement," Tony said without looking up.
"Already avoiding everyone?" Abby asked wryly.
"Nailed it," he said, finally looking up. He was surprised to realize Abby wasn't alone. "Vivian!"
"Hi, Tony," Vivian said, smiling as she placed a plate of brownies on the counter. "Abby and I went out last night, and she told me about your gathering, so I thought I'd tag along and see how you're doing."
She looked pretty in a soft green sundress with her hair down rather than in its usual ponytail. Tony turned on the charm. "I'm doing a whole lot better now that you're here."
Vivian rolled her eyes. "You do look better, but save the charm. I can't stay long. I'm actually on duty in a couple hours."
"Well, that's still a couple hours we can enjoy your company. Those brownies look great," Tony said.
"Thank Abby. She made them along with the cookies and cupcakes. I just helped carry them in," Vivian said, shrugging. "Baking and I have never gotten on."
The door opened again, and McGee came in looking rather tired but carrying an amazing bowl full of chocolate, whipped cream, and Tony didn't know what else.
"Did you make that?" he asked, surprised.
McGee shook his head. "My sister Sarah did. It has Kahlua in it."
"I think your sister Sarah is my new best friend," Tony said, finding room for the delicious-looking confection inside the well-stocked refrigerator. He supposed it was time for some of the soups to go.
"You should've brought her along, Tim. It's not fair she did all the work and doesn't get to eat any," Abby said.
McGee shook his head. "No way. I don't want her anywhere near Tony."
Vivian and Abby laughed while Tony scowled. "Hey, McKilljoy, did you have a date the other night?" Tony asked.
McGee lost his smirk. "What? How did you know about that?"
Tony's grin widened, showing a lot more teeth. "You just told me. So, who is she? Where did you meet? How'd you get her to go out with you?"
"You didn't tell me you had a date, McGee?" Abby said, in a tone that sounded like a mixture of hurt and anger.
"It was just one date, and it didn't go very well," he said quickly.
"Aww, McGoo, I told you not to mention you were an Elf Lord on the first date," Tony said, bumping McGee's shoulder with his own.
"An Elf Lord?" Vivian asked, knitting her brow.
"Don't ask," Abby replied. "What happened, Tim?"
"She had too many cats," he said, sighing.
"Cats?" Tony asked, lost. "She brought cats on your date?"
"Not exactly, but her clothes must've had a lot of fur on them, and I'm allergic, so I couldn't stop sneezing. I had to keep my chair pushed way back from her," Tim said, ducking his head.
Vivian tried to school her features, while Abby outright started giggling. Tony couldn't resist.
"So… you were basically allergic to your date?" he asked, eyebrows raised. Sometimes Tim just made it too easy.
"I guess. Then when I told her I was allergic to cats, she pulled out all these photos of her cats and just kept showing them to me, and she got annoyed when I didn't get all their names right," he said.
Tony pat McGee on the back before pushing him toward Abby. "Even I can't help this one," he said, shaking his head.
"Aww, Timmy," Abby said, wrapping her arms around him. "It's too bad you're allergic to cats. They're really incredible creatures and good company. My grandmother had one that alerted us when she had a heart attack."
Vivian stepped away from Abby and McGee and moved closer to Tony. "Fruit salad looks good. I'm glad to see you've at least got something healthy on the menu."
"I made a garden salad, too," he said, beaming.
Vivian pursed her lips. "You realize just making it doesn't give you any nutritional value though, right? You have to actually eat some."
Tony rolled his eyes. "I liked you better in isolation – you were less sarcastic," he said.
She grinned. "No, I'm always sarcastic, and your jeans are hanging off you, which means you haven't put back the weight you lost."
"So, you're looking at my jeans – or what's in them, eh Nurse Vivian?" he asked, flashing her one of his mega-watt smiles.
"Do you always deflect personal questions?" she asked, eyebrow raised.
"Oh, you have no idea," Gibbs said, entering the kitchen with Ducky and Palmer in tow. "Deflection is the one thing he's good at – particularly when it comes to dodging work. Are those burgers ready yet? Grill is fired up."
"On it, Boss. They're ready to go. Do you want to grill, or do you want me to do it?" Tony asked, pulling the tray of burger patties from the fridge.
"My house. My grill," Gibbs said, taking the tray and heading out the back door.
"Why don't I go along and supervise," Ducky said, handing Tony two bottles of wine. "Anything else you need me to bring out?"
"Yeah, take the cheese for Gibbs in case anyone wants cheeseburgers. I've got cheddar and provolone," Tony said, handing a pack of each to Ducky.
"What can I do?" Jimmy asked, looking a bit like a deer in the headlights. He handed Tony a container of some pasta salad.
"Jimmy! Have you met Vivian?" Tony asked. "She's a nurse at Bethesda and kept me from choking on my own insides. Vivian, Jimmy Palmer. He works with Ducky."
"Hi, Jimmy. I think we might've spoken on the phone," Vivian said, shaking his hand.
"Yeah. You and Nora were really good about keeping us up-to-date. Very much appreciated. Tony's not always honest about his condition," Jimmy said, smiling widely at Vivian.
"Still in the room," Tony said. Maybe a cookout with everyone who knew he'd nearly drowned in his own lungs might not be as fun as he'd thought.
"Nora is going to be so thrilled when I tell her I was here. If she wasn't on duty, I'd have dragged her along," Vivian said.
Eventually, all the guests had drifted out in the yard, leaving only Abby and Tony in the kitchen taking care of the last of the food prep when there was another knock at the door.
"Did you invite anyone else?" Tony asked.
Abby shook her head. "Uh, uh. Who knocks at Gibbs' house?"
Tony dried his hands on a towel and went to find out. He pulled the door open wide and found NCIS Director Jenny Shepherd standing there, smiling widely with a box of Italian pastries in her hands. She was wearing a very high-end Dolce & Gabbana suit that fit impeccably but was an odd choice for a cookout. Tony thought he pulled off an Oscar-worthy performance of covering his surprise.
"Director," he said.
"Hello, Tony. I heard a rumor of a gathering and thought I'd come by to see how you were. Am I right in believing you'll be returning to work tomorrow?" she asked, walking in before he'd extended the invitation.
"Yes, on desk duty until I'm cleared," he replied, wondering why she was asking. As the Director, certainly she knew he'd been cleared and for what. He knew Ducky had submitted the forms to Human Resources.
"And do you think you're up to that?" she asked, her eyes roaming over his ill-fitting jeans.
The question was phrased pleasantly enough, and she could've meant it out of concern for his health, but for some reason, the hairs on the back of Tony's neck stood on end.
"I think so, and my doctor agrees," he said cautiously.
"Excellent. As I understand it, you returned earlier than was advised the last time. I just want to be sure we don't have any more lapses in judgement," she said.
Her tone was still pleasant, but Tony felt as if she was dissecting him with her eyes. He wasn't sure what her beef with him was, but he was sure it was there. She'd also walked right to the kitchen and placed her pastries on the counter as if she'd been there before. Tony remembered that before he'd become ill, he'd suspected there was more between Gibbs and the Director than he knew, and now he was sure of it.
"Hello, Abby," she said, when they entered the kitchen, her tone considerably warmer.
Abby turned, and she was less successful than Tony in hiding her surprise at the presence of their new guest.
"Director! I didn't know you were going to be here today," she said, eyes wide as she put the salad she'd been holding on the counter.
The director smiled tightly. "I always like to keep my people guessing."
"Exactly what did you mean by lapses in judgment?" Tony asked, wanting clarification before he decided how he should feel. He really didn't think he liked the new director very much.
"Oh, just that your judgment seems questionable in regards to your own well-being. I understand you also didn't follow SoP when you opened the plague-filled letter, and I want to understand your reasoning. I'm just trying to watch out for the welfare of all my agents," she said, still smiling, but her voice had definitely taken on an edge.
"I assure you, I'm quite capable of desk duty," Tony said, anger and guilt licking at his insides.
He was stupid to have opened that damned letter in the first place, but who the hell would've honestly expected it to be filled with the fucking plague? As for returning to work before he was ready, that was a judgement call, and he'd felt ready at the time. He had, after all, saved two of his co-workers simply by being there. Still, the thought he could've infected anyone else still fueled his nightmares.
"That's really not your decision to make, Agent DiNozzo," she said, reverting to his title and drumming her long, red nails on the countertop.
"Uh… I'm just going to bring this outside," Abby said, clutching the salad bowl and escaping through the back door.
Tony had no doubt that she was running to get Gibbs, and he was both relieved and annoyed by it. He could fight his own battles and didn't need anyone to hold his hand, but it was Gibbs' house, and he supposed it wasn't his place to kick anyone out – particularly when she was all of their boss. Still, the best defense was always a good offense…
"So, what are you saying exactly, Director? Ducky has the medical forms clearing me for desk duty, and the team is more productive with an extra set of eyes," Tony said, teeth clenched. There was no way he could handle another week of staring at the walls, and he wasn't about to be sidelined by a new Director wanting to make a name for herself.
"Yes, I'm aware your medical clearance is in order," she said, although she didn't seem particularly happy about it, despite all her complaints about the team not being at full strength. "I thought it fair to inform you that I'm still considering a formal reprimand for creating the crisis in the bull pen, and you'll be suspended until a final decision is made."
Tony's insides went cold.
"Like hell he is," Gibbs said, storming through the back door and marching right up to the Director. Abby and the others all stood in the doorway, watching warily.
"Hello, Jethro. While it's not your call to make, I don't think this is the time or the place to discuss it. It's supposed to be a party, correct?" she asked, her dark eyes glittering.
"Then why did you bring it up?" Gibbs asked.
"I suppose Agent DiNozzo and I got carried away. We can discuss it at work tomorrow," she said, resting her hands on Gibbs' forearm.
He immediately pulled his arm away. "No, you started it, and I don't see the reason for the threats," Gibbs said icily.
"I don't make threats. As the Director of NCIS, I'm merely concerned that procedures weren't followed, and the consequences could've been disastrous."
"They already were. I think having the plague qualifies as a disaster, and no punishment you're going to dole out can be worse than that," Gibbs said, snarling.
Tony wasn't so sure. He'd take the plague again if the alternative was losing his job and these people he'd come to count on as his family. Gibbs had outright said he thought of Tony like a son, and now he was standing up to his ex-lover – and there was no doubt that's what she was – to defend him. It meant an awful lot to him, even if he wasn't entirely certain he deserved the staunch defense. He had opened that letter, after all.
The Director seemed taken aback by Gibbs fury, as well. "Of course, but procedures are there for a reason," she said.
"I didn't follow procedures, either. I was there for the whole thing, and I didn't stop him. Are you suspending the whole team?" Gibbs asked.
"Jethro–"
"Gibbs–"
"Director Morrow already put new procedures in place starting in the mail room. Are you saying what Morrow did wasn't good enough? So, what more are you planning to do?" Gibbs asked, ignoring both the Director's and Tony's attempts to interrupt.
"That's uncalled for," Director Shepherd said, snapping and forgoing the feigned politeness.
"So is showing up at a welcome back party and threatening my agent. We're a team, Jenny, and if you're going after one of us, you're going after all of us on this. If you're suspending DiNozzo, then you're suspending me, as well," Gibbs said, icy eyes ablaze with fury. He placed his hand on Tony's shoulder in silent support, squeezing slightly to tell him not to interfere.
"And me, as well. I had concerns about Anthony coming back to work when he did, and I should've insisted he was only on desk duty then, but I didn't, so I should be suspended, too," Ducky said, stepping forward on Gibbs other side.
"And me, as I also said nothing," Jimmy said, although he looked as if he was facing a firing squad.
"And definitely me. I was the one who handed him the letter despite knowing the protocol, and I wouldn't even be here if Tony hadn't gone back on active duty when he did," McGee said, standing shoulder-to-shoulder with Jimmy.
"And me… because… well because if they're going, I'm going," Abby said, wringing her hands but moving up to link her arm with Tony's.
Although Vivian didn't know all the players or exactly what was going on, she placed her warm hand on the small of Tony's back in solidarity.
It was clear the Director realized she'd lost this battle. If she didn't concede, she'd have a mutiny on her hands, but Tony could tell by the look in her eye that the war was only just beginning.
Author's Note:
Thanks so much to all who take the time to review. I love to hear your thoughts and appreciate it very much.