Cars, Balls, and Unicycles

After dispatching what seemed to be an endless drove of Clown Zombies, the team arrived at the next puzzle. It was a locked door, with a trio of balls (hey! get your minds out of the gutter people, they were for juggling), a clown car, and a unicycle scattered throughout the room. The car and unicycle were a bright red color, while the balls were red, yellow, and blue. It appeared as if they'd have to do some sort of trick using the three items. But there was nothing left behind to tell them exactly what that might yet be.

"I can juggle a little bit," Virginia admitted, "I used to do it as a child, for the amusement. My skills are a little rusty, but I think I can get it to go. The only problem is, I've seen this act. The clown has to ride the unicycle while juggling. However, I don't know how to ride one. And it seems too small for Clive or Gallows to fit on." She looked in Jet's direction, blushing furiously. He felt his blood get hot, knowing what she needed him to do. Jet had never ridden a unicycle before, so he figured he'd have to get used to it while Virginia warmed up her juggling skills and the others did something about that tiny car in the room's corner.

"Well, that settles it. Virginia and Jet, take the unicycle. Gallows and I will look into the clown car. These things can seat so many, despite their appearance. We should plan how we are to get in though, it will not do for one of us to sit on another's hand or foot," Clive informed the rest of the team. He walked over to where the car was parked, and took a look. Gallows followed, he too would need to know what to do so they could ride in it. When they peered inside, they found only one seat that two people needed to sit in.

Jet muttered, "This ought to be interesting, the two biggest members of our team having to share a vehicle as small as that. The reason I only trust the train to take me anywhere. Or my feet or horse. Well, we'd better get this stupid unicycle to work. Honestly, how much more of this embarrassment can a guy like me take? This whole trip is degrading, and I'm not earning a cent unless Leila finds herself in a very generous mood when we return. Next time he wants to drink all night, I'll drag Gallows back into the room."

He got on the unicycle, and began trying to keep his balance. It took a few laps around the room, but soon he learned how to shift his weight while riding on the one wheeler. Now, he just had to learn how to shift his weight with Virginia on his lap juggling a trio of rubber balls. Although she was easily getting into her task, it would be much harder on a moving vehicle. Besides, together they weighed over 200 pounds.

Meanwhile, Gallows was trying to get into the car. Since he was the biggest, it would be sensible for him to go in before Clive. For Clive sitting on Gallows's hand would be a lot less painful than Gallows sitting on Clive's. He sat on about half the seat, with his legs still out of the door. Clive then did the same thing. The two began trying to squish each other over just enough to fit in. But in the struggle, Gallows knocked Clive over, and his hand ended up falling right on the gas pedal. At the same time, the Baskar's hand met the ignition, turning the key on accident. Instantly, the engine began to rev, and the car began to drive in a circle around the room. It was almost as if someone had programmed it to run in that direction. Of course, the two Drifters' legs were still hanging out of the car, and they were hanging on for dear life.

Clive looked at Gallows. "Would you please hit the breaks, we've got to stop this thing. Else who can keep us from crashing into Jet and Virginia once they begin their juggling unicycle act?" Gallows did what Clive had told him, a little too well I might add. He slammed his hand on the breaks—well, Clive did say to hit them. Instantly, the pedal went right through the bottom of the car, cutting their chance of getting the vehicle to stop. As the two looked at each other, they began to panic. Even Clive was freaking out.

"Hey, Jet," Virginia stated, "I think Clive and Gallows are in trouble. Looks like that little car has lost its breaking system. We've got to do something to help them." And she would have run over to try and stop the car herself, had Jet not grabbed her. Luckily he did, else she would have been run over as it ran past.

"There's nothing we can do about that. Probably the only thing to do is wait for it to run out of steam and stop. Meanwhile, don't we have a stupid act to put on ourselves?" asked Jet. He pulled Virginia onto his lap, and they began riding around as she juggled. But, with the difference in weight, Jet wasn't able to keep it balanced for very long. The unicycle fell over, and the two Drifters fell into the car's open sunroof.

Gallows was desperately trying to steer, causing the car to shift its track and fly around the room. Suddenly, they found themselves approaching a wall. The team would have bailed out, except they were all squished together. Clive shut his eyes, Gallows broke the steering wheel trying to get them out of the way, and Jet pulled Virginia close to him instinctively. Blushing, the female Drifter held onto him as well. It was almost as if they were telling each other their true feelings, knowing that death was about to claim them.

Crash! The car hit the wall. It barreled right through it, knocking the team in a hay bale. If there was any consolation, the little vehicle didn't move anymore. Virginia was the first to stir, protected by Jet's arms from most of the onslaught. Gallows was the next person up, followed by Clive. The former took one look at Jet and Virginia's position, and began to snicker. It was then that Jet got up, his eyes filled with fire.

The treasure hunter yelled, "Gallows! This is not funny! So what if I got knocked up against her in the fray, and just happened to land in that position? It's not some stupid fate, it's just the fact of dumb luck. Keep it up and I'll kill you." He pulled out Airget-lamh just to tell the Baskar that he wasn't kidding at all.

Virginia sighed. 'I expected no less from him. Jet's always been rude and antisocial. I know he was ready to sacrifice his own life for me though. They always say that actions speak louder than words.'

Suddenly, a creaking noise was heard throughout the whole ruins. The team turned to find that the door was opening. They ran to see what was inside, only to be met with horror. For sitting there, in front of a giant treasure chest, was a clown zombie like no other. Its height was enough to dwarf even the golem Asgard, and that's saying something. The creature let out a wicked laugh, and began shuffling towards the four unlucky Drifters. Jet held out his ARM, and gave Gallows a glare. 'If we get out of this one alive, I'm going to kill him. If he didn't hit on that thief woman, we wouldn't be in this predicament right now.'

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Teefa's Last Words…

I'm not going to ask how a car got to Filgaia; it's just there for the humor. Yup, and the enemy is one huge ass clown. Part of this story is to serve the same purpose as playing "Carnival of Terror" on Neopets; to beat up on the clowns. Remember, my childhood scarred me of them. Now then, kill that clown Drifters!