Disclaimer: If I owned X-Men Evolution, then I probably wouldn't be wondering who the heck the Misfits are, now would I?
Have you ever looked at the stars? They're gorgeous. The only speck of warm light in a cold, dark expanse. They contrast so much, and yet fit perfectly together. Their lives are simple: use up all the energy, become a supernova, then a black hole, and then "poof". They're done. I'm not sure if that's all true, but I could care less. It's all the same to me. Simplicity at it's best. They don't have to worry about anything. They just live out their lives peacefully, from beginning to end. No surprises along the way to throw anything off.
I wish my life was like theirs. No surprises, just beginning and end. If there were no surprises, then I wouldn't have this curse, or these damned voices.
I stretched slightly, the slick material of my windbreaker rubbing against the rough shingles on the roof of the Institute. It was probably around three in the morning, but I didn't care. I wanted to stay outside and stare at the stars. They were so many things: wonderful, simple, brilliant. I could only name a few. Whenever I needed help back in Mississippi, I would sit out on my rooftop and just stare at the stars, hoping to find my answers written in them. And that was exactly what I was doing now.
My questions were few, and quite simple. But the answers…I knew they would be complicated. I wanted to know exactly why I was given this power of mine, but at the same time, I didn't. I was afraid to know the answer. What if it was something vague and cliché like, "It's your destiny"? I couldn't handle that. I need plain, explanatory answers. Not a riddle.
I sat up, wrapping my arms around my legs and hugging my knees to my chest. The view of the city was amazing. Orange streetlamps stood at stationary points on streets, like soldiers ready to go into battle. Farther off, I could see a few stores signs, their neon lights blaring into the night sky.
I sighed, thinking. All my friends ran through my head, their smiling faces both calling out and mocking me. Kitty, with her shy and preppy disposition. Kurt, the funny guy. Scott, a.k.a Mr. Military. Jean, who just had to be little Miss Perfect. Evan, who had disappeared into the sewers a while ago to lead the Morlocks. Risty, my one true friend who understood me. Remy…wait, he wasn't a friend. That damn Cajun used me. He just wanted me there to fulfill his own agenda. But…I couldn't help myself thinking about him. I didn't want to, but I couldn't help but want to see him again. Before I had found out about who he really was, I had had a pretty good time with him. Ignoring the fact that he kidnapped me, of course.
I shook the thoughts from my head, thankful that the voices were still locked up. A small zephyr kicked up, making the already cool night colder. I pulled my jacket tighter around me, hoping to block out the chill. The wind brushed over the treetops, the branches swaying as if in time with a song. I closed my eyes, enjoying the feel of the cool wind against my neck.
It was a time like now that I wished someone would just pop up and offer to stay up here with me. But no one in his or her right mind would be up at this time of night. Oh, except me. I may have voices in my head, but I am not crazy.
"Well, Chere, what would y' be doing out here at dis time of night all alone?" asked a smooth voice behind me.
My heart stopped as I recognized the voice. I closed my eyes tightly, praying that it wasn't so. No, he couldn't be here. How'd he get past security? How could he know that I'd be out here at this exact time of night? How, on all of God's green earth, could it be possible?
"Y' going t' talk t' me?" he asked as he moved closer and sat down beside me.
I scooted away a few inches, glaring at the streetlights. I didn't want him here. I didn't want to talk to him. But, then again, hadn't I wanted this? Hadn't I wanted someone to show up to talk and spend time with me? Yes, but not him. But I just had to go and test Fate, hadn't I?
"C'mon, Chere, y' hurtin' Remy," he said, putting on a wounded look and holding a hand against his chest.
I rolled my eyes. "Then maybe ya'll leave," I shot back. I wanted him to leave. I wanted to be left alone. I was afraid that he would get me to show him who I really was. I only wanted my close friends to know; he didn't exactly classify as one. Still, I couldn't help but be elated that he had come out to be on the roof with me, no matter what his agenda this time.
Remy shot me a toothy grin that glowed in the moonlight. "Don't count on it," he replied.
I groaned. "What do ya want this time?" I demanded. I didn't know why he was here, and though I hated to admit it, I was curious as to why.
"I wanted t' see y'," he replied, reaching up to tuck a strand of hair away from my face. I instinctively reached up and slapped his hand away, staring at the lake, my breathing quickening with each rise and fall of my chest. I wanted to cry. I wanted him to be able to touch me and to be able to touch him, but I couldn't. And I hated the fact that I now pushed people away without a second thought. I had thought that I was able to choose when to, but I couldn't. It seemed like I was loosing control.
Remy seemed to sense how I felt. He set a hand on my shoulder. "I'm sorry, Chere," he said softly.
Tears filled my eyes, threatening to fall. No, I didn't want him to see. I didn't want to cry. But why didn't I want him to see me cry?
Remy scooted over closer to me. "P'tite, you can just cry," he whispered, wrapping an arm around my shoulders.
I pushed him away and stood up, tears falling from my eyes. I turned to look at him, glaring intensely. I didn't want him to see me cry, to know how soft I was. I didn't want him to be here tonight.
"Go away," I whispered softly.
"Chere," he began, looking as if he was begging for forgiveness and an explanation.
"No," I interrupted. "Just leave meh alone! Go away!"
I felt it before I heard it. An intense throbbing in my head, followed by uncountable, screaming, conflicting voices, all fighting for my attention. No one shut up, they just kept screaming. The pain in my head increased, and I felt as if it would explode. I groaned and reached up to massage my temples, but with the slightest touch, my skin felt like it was on fire. I didn't know what was going on anymore, I was just trying to control the voices and see through the pain. Faintly, I heard Remy call my name. Suddenly, someone grabbed my wrist, shocking me back to reality. I found myself lying face down on the roof, ready to fall off. The only thing that stopped me was Remy.
"Hang on, Rogue. Remy's got y'," he said, his grip never loosening off my hand. My leather glove started to come off, exposing my white skin. My eyes widened and I jerked my hand out of Remy's grip, my glove staying with him. I stayed on the roof, miraculously not falling.
"P'tite, hold on! Remy'll get y'," he said.
I groaned. "Shut up," I hissed. "Ya'll wake up everyone else."
Remy nodded and extended his hand. "Give Remy your hand," he whispered.
I slowly extended my gloved hand, clasping mine in his. He pulled me back up with ease, setting me on the peak of the roof. I turned away from him. "Ya better leave," I muttered. "Security'll catch ya." I just didn't want him here anymore. This was supposed to be my time. And, the voices wouldn't shut up. I would only be able to deal with them if he was gone. Not to mention that I was embarrassed that he had helped me up. I should have been able to handle that myself.
He grinned. "Dey won't catch Remy," he replied.
I turned to him, my eyes now dry. "Leave, or Ah'll make ya," I threatened. I needed him gone.
Remy shook his head. "Dat's no way t' thank Remy fo' savin' y'," he said, shaking his head.
I rolled me eyes. "Thank ya, now leave," I hissed, shoving him with my elbow.
He shrugged. "Fine. But Remy'll see y' later, Chere," he replied, rising and finally leaving me alone.
I breathed a sigh of relief, knowing that he was gone. I needed my peace and quiet to lock up the voices. But try as hard as I could, there was no shutting them up. I couldn't do it. It was getting worse, and I knew it. I didn't know what I was going to do, but I knew that I had to do something soon.
Don't worry about it, whispered a voice. Vaguely, I knew it was a voice in my head, but the fact didn't register in my mind until much later, as sleep deprivation hit me hard then. The only thing I wanted was to be in my bed.
I would deal with the voices in the morning.
I like this chapter much more than last chapter.
Reviews:
Skye: Lol, maybe you're right.
enchantedlight: Thanks! I'm guessing that this was soon enough.
Abaiisiia: Uh, thanks! I was kind of surprised by the first few words, but happy in the end.
smm: Thank you. I hate how some people make her out as angry, mean, and cruel, so I decided to be different.
Well, I will try to update soon. Thank you for reviewing everyone!
R&R!
---Jojo---