Chapter 6: "Amburo" (burn)

If this was Ken's idea of taking out his frustration, Aya certainly had the wrong idea before. He didn't know what he should do… was he scared?

Tears mixed with blood on Aya's cheeks as he softly leaned into the kiss, his eyes shutting close with ease. Ken held onto him with all of his might; his strong arms wrapped around Aya's shoulders as if he thought Aya would start running away. And with his personality, he just might have.

The redhead's throat let out a quiet purr before his eyes shot open in horror and he pushed Ken back onto the bed rather roughly.

"What the hell do you think you're doing Hidaka?!"

Aya wiped the blood from his lip and looked at Ken, but he wasn't sure why he was looking. He looked at Ken because he felt bad perhaps, or maybe he wanted to punch his face in for the bold move. Ken didn't even have a reaction to Aya's statement, he just lay there on his bed, looking so forlorn, so helpless; he didn't know how to respond. Neither of them did. Aya wasn't even sure why he came up into his friend's room in the first place.

"…I… Aya, I'm…" Before he could finish his sentence he buried his face in the mattress and his body shook violently. He just cried silently, let the tears flow without making a peep.

Aya just stared. He gingerly touched his lips and replayed that scene in his mind again, still in shock about what had just happened. He stood up and narrowed his eyes at his unhappy comrade without saying a word. A tentative pale hand reached out, maybe to touch Siberian, maybe to run fingers though his hair and tell him it would be okay. But his hand dropped and Aya took a deep breath. Ken's room lost its warmth as Aya slammed the door behind him when he walked out.

---

"Ken likes to spend a lot of time in his room lately." Yohji stated as his leader came down the stairs. "Find out any idea why?"

Pained lilac orbs burned into Yohji's skull as if to say he didn't want to talk about it without actually telling him so. "No. He wouldn't talk to me." He turned his head away, and Yohji could have sworn he heard Aya's voice crack.

---

Thinking. That was something Ken had to start doing from now on. But he couldn't help it. He was yearning for that kiss, to feel Aya against him. To feel his warm, sweet lips against is own. And although he longed for more, the kiss was short and chaste. But that was fine; at least he had gotten what he wanted for once. Even if it would never happen again.

He wondered what actually compelled him jump at Aya. All this time he could hold himself back, no matter how many times he had watched the magnificence from afar. And now all of a sudden, he let himself just dive on him? He let himself be embarrassed? And worst of all, now Aya knows about his feelings! Ken had struggled for so long not to let any word get out, not to let anything compromise the nice life everyone thought he had- and now, Aya was suspicious of him. And there was nothing he could do to make Aya forget.

Ken didn't want to have to ignore his companion. That was the last thing he would want.

So, maybe… he didn't have to?

Maybe if he stopped grieving, and tried to make the best of things...

---

Yohji wondered why the hell Omi spent all his damn time on that computer. "I'll be back in a minute Aya, I just want to go see what that little squirt is up to."

The leather couch made a weird noise when Yohji got up from it and went into the next room. He'd be back in a minute, he never misses an episode of Gravitation. That Yuki Eiri fella, boy was he good lookin'.

But Aya knew the sexual intentions Yohji had.

Aya's ear's twitched when he heard footsteps coming from behind him. Strong bronze arms coiled around his neck and a cheery "Hello!" came from the back of his head. He knew it was Ken, but what he wondered was why all of a sudden he was as joyful as ever. Ken let loose his grip on Aya's neck and plopped down next to Aya on the couch, watching the TV intently. A sweatdrop formed on Abyssinian's head.

"What'cha watching?" Ken said enthusiastically.

"Gravitation." Aya put on his usual cold, icy gaze. He didn't know what KenKen was up to, but he didn't want to have anything to do with his plan.

Ken put on his cutest face and rubbed his head into Aya's arm. I don't know if this plan will work, but it sure as hell is worth trying.

Aya moved away. "I don't know what's gotten into you, but whatever it is it's not amusing." He said in his usual, monotone voice. He turned his face away from the brunette and turned his nose up.

"There is no shame in loving someone, Aya."

Fujimiya's eyes widened at that comment and he stared at Ken for a long time. Ken flung a hand up to his mouth. Oh shit oh shit oh shit.

Ken's plan was a bust and he had barely even gotten started. Although he generally stood by that statement, he never thought he'd be saying it to the person he loved. And, even though he had really not said 'I love you', that sentence was pretty damn close to it. That could be loosely translated to 'I love you and I don't care what you think.' Or, In Ken's situation, he hoped Aya would take it as 'I don't love you so please disregard what I'm saying.'

Aya got up from the couch and looked straight into Ken's frightened eyes. He clenched his fists so tight they turned white, and he took a deep breath. Ken stood up and opened his mouth to say something, probably an explanation, but Aya cut him short by socking him rough in the stomach.

Ken toppled over and leaned his chin on Aya's shoulder. "A-Aya… why… it-it burns… burns…"

Aya said nothing and laid him gently on the leather couch, putting a pillow behind his head as his face scrunched in pain. Payback? No, he couldn't say that, because he was the one who told Ken to hit him first. It was more like anger.

Unfortunately, Yohji and Omi took that moment to walk in from whatever they were doing. Aya was sure he didn't want to know what it was. As per usual, Omi got alarmed and rushed to Ken's side. Nothing serious, he definitely looked winded.

"What the hell happened to Ken?" Yohji said, quirking an eyebrow.

"Don't worry about it, I'll take care of it."

Aya put a gentle hand on Omi's shoulder and signaled him to leave with Yohji. They both nodded and retreated upstairs for sleep.

A sigh escaped pastel lips and he kneeled down beside his comrade. Ken looked at him with soft eyes. Abyssinian brushed a gentle finger to Ken's ear to move a bit of hair out of the way, and whispered softly; "There is no shame in loving someone, Ken, but there is shame in expecting something in return."

With that, he stood, turned on his heel and followed his friends' footsteps upstairs, leaving a dazed teammate behind.

It burned.

"Basium dano ops redimio animus pro infinitio."