A/N: It's not really a Hiei/ Kurama fic as it is a plan to get them together. The main characters in this story are actually Botan, Kuwabara, and Yusuke, but Hiei and Kurama are the focus of their plan. You'll see. Just read.
X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X
Koenma lightly tapped his fingers across his desk. He was waiting for Botan. After browsing through numerous files on demons, he realized that many demons were trying to bribe Reikai members with items of power and valuables. Surely, all Reikai members wouldn't fall for that, but two certain demons came to his mind. He tapped his fingers again.
"Argh! Where is she?! The one time I don't have papers to stamp, she doesn't come! Argh! Minions! Are there any more papers that need stamping?! I'm bored! Bored! Bored! Bored!" Koenma jumped off his desk and spun on the floor like a child throwing a tantrum.
"Fine. Since there's no papers to stamp, I'll just redecorate!" Koenma took the only other thing in his office, the stamp, and started to put its mark everywhere on the room. Soon, the red insignia covered almost the entire room. Only the door was unmarked. As he was about to stamp the last few inches on the door, it opened, and the stamp went right onto Botan's face. He froze in mid-air.
"Ko-En-Ma-sa-ma!!" Botan screamed.
"O-oh! Botan! You've finally made it!" he said, with the stamp still stuck on her face. Botan grabbed him by the waistband and threw him back into his chair. She took the sleeve of her kimono and rubbed it against her face, trying to erase the mark. Unfortunately, the red ink doesn't come off so easily.
"Ano- Botan! I've called you here for a very important reason!"
"Argh! The ink doesn't come off!" Botan cried.
"Well, the ink is supposed to be permanent on paper." Koenma nervously says. Botan glared at him.
"And what am I going to do if it doesn't come off?" Botan asked.
"Oh don't worry, I've stamped Jorge with it many times, it'll come off in a week, at most."
"What?! I can't float around with this on my face for a week! I'll scare away all the souls I'm supposed to pick up!"
"Aw, calm down, here, eat this." Koenma says and hands her a strange looking bulb. It almost looked like an onion. Botan took it and ingested it. Soon, her face turned purple and she wanted to puke. It tasted so disgusting, but she managed to swallow it.
"Ack, Koenma-sama , what was that?"
"Oh, hey, it actually worked. I didn't think you'd eat it so easily."
"What?"
"Well, I received this strange food when I ordered something from the Makai. They said it got rid of all ailments and skin disorders. I didn't believe them, but hey, it got rid of the stamp!" Koenma said.
"What.......... was it?" Botan wearily asked. Koenma had a huge grin on his face.
"It's a very exotic treat from the deep regions of dense forests. The demons that lurk there have great health and skin. This treat is from these rare creatures."
"So, what was it exactly?"
"Their prostate." Koenma said calmly. Botan froze. She seized Koenma by the throat and started to choke him.
"What do you mean their prostate?! How could you let me eat that?! Am I just a guinea pig for you, to eat your questionable meals?! Argh! Koenma- sama! EW!" Botan cried and tightened her grip.
"Ack! Botan. Botan. Let-me-breathe." Koenma choked out. "HELP!" In a few seconds, minions rushed into the room and separated the hysterical Botan from Koenma. After he took a few breaths, he started to talk.
"This is exactly why I called you here. Demons in the Makai are starting to sell exotic and strange items of power to various demons. You yourself have just experienced the horrible after-effects of these items."
"I'll kill you!"
"Exactly. Increased aggression amongst the demons is one consequence resulting from the sale of these items. It is our job to make sure powerful demons don't get their hands on these items."
"YOU gave it to me!"
"Well, Botan, I just wanted you to full experience the depth and seriousness of carrying out this mission." Koenma said. Botan was still fuming.
"They are cures for skin disorders and health problems. They are not dangerous!"
"Well, that was just one item they were selling. They have many more that can grant vast power and wealth. Now, let me explain the mission. The demons we are targeting to make sure that the items don't fall into their hands, are Hiei and Kurama. I know they're on our side, but I want to make sure they're happy working for the Reikai. If they're discontent, they might be tempted to buy these items. I'm not so worried about other demons, because they don't have access to the Reikai, but Hiei and Kurama do, so make sure they are happy and won't betray us." Koenma finished.
"And what exactly am I supposed to do to keep them happy?"
"I have full confidence in your ability to figure that out on your own." Koenma said, and gave her an encouraging smile. "Now, minions, take her outside" he ordered. The minions carried her off and threw her out of Reikai.
"What? You can't just throw me out! Koenma-sama!" she cried. She banged against the door, but it was locked. It wouldn't open for her until she completed her mission. 'Fine. When I finish this mission, I'll come back and I'll make sure you pay. You can't keep me away forever....' Botan thought. She took out her oar and floated to the Ningenkai.
X X X X
Botan was floating around Japan, when she spotted Hiei and Kurama under a tree. Hey, they seemed pretty happy just talking to each other. An idea popped into her head. Hiei and Kurama were fine with each other, but wouldn't they be even happier if they were together, as in mates? Both humans and demons liked sex. She was sure that it was the lack of it that might cause these two demons to seek fulfillment in items of power and wealth. But wait, Youko Kurama had plenty of sex, yet he still sought wealth. But Kurama is human now, he's much easier to please than his demon counterpart.
Ever since Hiei signed on the Reikai team, with Kurama's life also at stake if he did something bad, Hiei has been an obedient demon. Did that mean Hiei was already content with Kurama? She wasn't sure, but she knew Hiei felt something for Kurama, and vice versa. It was so obvious! She just had to get them to tell each other. Yes, Botan had her plan. To make sure Hiei and Kurama were happy, she just needed to get them to express their love! Oh, she never thought this would be so simple!
Botan floated away from the two demons, giving them their privacy. She needed to find Yusuke and Kuwabara. She would need help carrying out the mission. She found Kuwabara at his house, studying, like a good boy. They found Yusuke sleeping in his room. Kuwabara roughly woke him up.
"What the fuck? Why'd you wake me up so early? It's only noon!" Yusuke said, and crawled back under the covers. Botan took out her oar and whacked Yusuke out of bed.
"Get up! This is an important mission from Koenma-sama!" Botan said.
"Can't you just get Kuwabara to do it? I'm sure he's improved enough to take on whatever demon is causing trouble." Yusuke groaned.
"That's right. The great Kuwabara can protect the world all on his own."
"I mean, if it was any REAL problem, you would have come to me first, right?" Yusuke said.
"That's rig- HEY!" Kuwabara said.
"This mission doesn't involve killing of any kind." Botan said.
"Aw, not another rescue mission." Yusuke complained.
"Is another damsel in distress? Don't worry, I, Kazuma Kuwabara will save her!"
"No, it's not a rescue mission either!" Botan said
"Then what is it?" Kuwabara asked.
"This has to do with Hiei and Kurama." Botan said.
"I knew it! The shrimp has betrayed us, and he convinced Kurama to do so too! I should have killed him when I met him." Kuwabara said.
"No! Will you two let me finish? Kurama and Hiei haven't betrayed us – yet. Our mission is to make sure they stay loyal to the Reikai." Botan finished.
"What? And how are we supposed to do that?" Yusuke asked.
"Well, I think that if they are happy, they will have no reason to betray the Reikai, right?" Botan said.
"Well, yeah, but Kurama seems happy the way he is. But Hiei, he's another story. I mean, only blood and power would make him happy, right?" Yusuke said.
"What keeps humans and demons happy?" Botan asked them.
"Uh... money, power, cool items, drugs, alcohol –" Yusuke started.
"NO! Love!" Botan exclaimed.
"Demons can love?" Kuwabara asked.
"Of course! It's only when they can't find love that they're so destructive. Few demons find love, that's why most are believed to be incapable of loving." Botan said.
"Alright, so we just get them some hot chicks. Wow, this has been the easiest mission yet." Yusuke said.
"Why should we find girls, when they already have someone they love?" Botan said. Yusuke gave her a weird look. He walked closer to Botan and whispered in her ear.
"Kurama probably likes one of those girls in his school, but Hiei? I know he loves Yukina, but he can't have that kind of relationship with her. I mean, she's hot, but she's his sister." Yusuke whispered. Botan slammed her oar on his head.
"No, hentai! Not her! They love each other!" Botan exclaimed.
"What?!?! They're GAY?!" Kuwabara screeched. Yusuke didn't seem shocked.
"Well, now that I think about it, it is pretty obvious. I mean, they're always together. And Hiei never seems to mind when Kurama touches him. If it were one of us, he would have killed us." Yusuke said.
"What? But I thought they were just best friends." Kuwabara said.
"Oh, come on Kuwa-chan. It's so apparent!" Botan said.
"Well, I mean, yeah. They're always standing near each other. And they kind of look at each other all weird." Kuwabara said.
"Kind of like how you look at Yukina without the drool?" Yusuke asked.
"Shut up, Urameshi! Hey, wait, we're supposed to help those two....... get.... together?" Kuwabara asked.
"Yes! If they're happy, they won't betray you. I mean, think about during battle. Would you want to fight against Hiei and Kurama?" Botan asked. Yusuke and Kuwabara pondered for a moment. They both always seemed to fight in sync with each other and their attacks can sometimes be very vicious.
"Alright, Botan, we'll carry out this mission." Yusuke said.
"Good! And let's do it fast so I can get back at Koenma." Botan said.
"Huh?" the boys asked.
"Never mind, just complete the mission."
X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X
X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X
Koenma lightly tapped his fingers across his desk. He was waiting for Botan. After browsing through numerous files on demons, he realized that many demons were trying to bribe Reikai members with items of power and valuables. Surely, all Reikai members wouldn't fall for that, but two certain demons came to his mind. He tapped his fingers again.
"Argh! Where is she?! The one time I don't have papers to stamp, she doesn't come! Argh! Minions! Are there any more papers that need stamping?! I'm bored! Bored! Bored! Bored!" Koenma jumped off his desk and spun on the floor like a child throwing a tantrum.
"Fine. Since there's no papers to stamp, I'll just redecorate!" Koenma took the only other thing in his office, the stamp, and started to put its mark everywhere on the room. Soon, the red insignia covered almost the entire room. Only the door was unmarked. As he was about to stamp the last few inches on the door, it opened, and the stamp went right onto Botan's face. He froze in mid-air.
"Ko-En-Ma-sa-ma!!" Botan screamed.
"O-oh! Botan! You've finally made it!" he said, with the stamp still stuck on her face. Botan grabbed him by the waistband and threw him back into his chair. She took the sleeve of her kimono and rubbed it against her face, trying to erase the mark. Unfortunately, the red ink doesn't come off so easily.
"Ano- Botan! I've called you here for a very important reason!"
"Argh! The ink doesn't come off!" Botan cried.
"Well, the ink is supposed to be permanent on paper." Koenma nervously says. Botan glared at him.
"And what am I going to do if it doesn't come off?" Botan asked.
"Oh don't worry, I've stamped Jorge with it many times, it'll come off in a week, at most."
"What?! I can't float around with this on my face for a week! I'll scare away all the souls I'm supposed to pick up!"
"Aw, calm down, here, eat this." Koenma says and hands her a strange looking bulb. It almost looked like an onion. Botan took it and ingested it. Soon, her face turned purple and she wanted to puke. It tasted so disgusting, but she managed to swallow it.
"Ack, Koenma-sama , what was that?"
"Oh, hey, it actually worked. I didn't think you'd eat it so easily."
"What?"
"Well, I received this strange food when I ordered something from the Makai. They said it got rid of all ailments and skin disorders. I didn't believe them, but hey, it got rid of the stamp!" Koenma said.
"What.......... was it?" Botan wearily asked. Koenma had a huge grin on his face.
"It's a very exotic treat from the deep regions of dense forests. The demons that lurk there have great health and skin. This treat is from these rare creatures."
"So, what was it exactly?"
"Their prostate." Koenma said calmly. Botan froze. She seized Koenma by the throat and started to choke him.
"What do you mean their prostate?! How could you let me eat that?! Am I just a guinea pig for you, to eat your questionable meals?! Argh! Koenma- sama! EW!" Botan cried and tightened her grip.
"Ack! Botan. Botan. Let-me-breathe." Koenma choked out. "HELP!" In a few seconds, minions rushed into the room and separated the hysterical Botan from Koenma. After he took a few breaths, he started to talk.
"This is exactly why I called you here. Demons in the Makai are starting to sell exotic and strange items of power to various demons. You yourself have just experienced the horrible after-effects of these items."
"I'll kill you!"
"Exactly. Increased aggression amongst the demons is one consequence resulting from the sale of these items. It is our job to make sure powerful demons don't get their hands on these items."
"YOU gave it to me!"
"Well, Botan, I just wanted you to full experience the depth and seriousness of carrying out this mission." Koenma said. Botan was still fuming.
"They are cures for skin disorders and health problems. They are not dangerous!"
"Well, that was just one item they were selling. They have many more that can grant vast power and wealth. Now, let me explain the mission. The demons we are targeting to make sure that the items don't fall into their hands, are Hiei and Kurama. I know they're on our side, but I want to make sure they're happy working for the Reikai. If they're discontent, they might be tempted to buy these items. I'm not so worried about other demons, because they don't have access to the Reikai, but Hiei and Kurama do, so make sure they are happy and won't betray us." Koenma finished.
"And what exactly am I supposed to do to keep them happy?"
"I have full confidence in your ability to figure that out on your own." Koenma said, and gave her an encouraging smile. "Now, minions, take her outside" he ordered. The minions carried her off and threw her out of Reikai.
"What? You can't just throw me out! Koenma-sama!" she cried. She banged against the door, but it was locked. It wouldn't open for her until she completed her mission. 'Fine. When I finish this mission, I'll come back and I'll make sure you pay. You can't keep me away forever....' Botan thought. She took out her oar and floated to the Ningenkai.
X X X X
Botan was floating around Japan, when she spotted Hiei and Kurama under a tree. Hey, they seemed pretty happy just talking to each other. An idea popped into her head. Hiei and Kurama were fine with each other, but wouldn't they be even happier if they were together, as in mates? Both humans and demons liked sex. She was sure that it was the lack of it that might cause these two demons to seek fulfillment in items of power and wealth. But wait, Youko Kurama had plenty of sex, yet he still sought wealth. But Kurama is human now, he's much easier to please than his demon counterpart.
Ever since Hiei signed on the Reikai team, with Kurama's life also at stake if he did something bad, Hiei has been an obedient demon. Did that mean Hiei was already content with Kurama? She wasn't sure, but she knew Hiei felt something for Kurama, and vice versa. It was so obvious! She just had to get them to tell each other. Yes, Botan had her plan. To make sure Hiei and Kurama were happy, she just needed to get them to express their love! Oh, she never thought this would be so simple!
Botan floated away from the two demons, giving them their privacy. She needed to find Yusuke and Kuwabara. She would need help carrying out the mission. She found Kuwabara at his house, studying, like a good boy. They found Yusuke sleeping in his room. Kuwabara roughly woke him up.
"What the fuck? Why'd you wake me up so early? It's only noon!" Yusuke said, and crawled back under the covers. Botan took out her oar and whacked Yusuke out of bed.
"Get up! This is an important mission from Koenma-sama!" Botan said.
"Can't you just get Kuwabara to do it? I'm sure he's improved enough to take on whatever demon is causing trouble." Yusuke groaned.
"That's right. The great Kuwabara can protect the world all on his own."
"I mean, if it was any REAL problem, you would have come to me first, right?" Yusuke said.
"That's rig- HEY!" Kuwabara said.
"This mission doesn't involve killing of any kind." Botan said.
"Aw, not another rescue mission." Yusuke complained.
"Is another damsel in distress? Don't worry, I, Kazuma Kuwabara will save her!"
"No, it's not a rescue mission either!" Botan said
"Then what is it?" Kuwabara asked.
"This has to do with Hiei and Kurama." Botan said.
"I knew it! The shrimp has betrayed us, and he convinced Kurama to do so too! I should have killed him when I met him." Kuwabara said.
"No! Will you two let me finish? Kurama and Hiei haven't betrayed us – yet. Our mission is to make sure they stay loyal to the Reikai." Botan finished.
"What? And how are we supposed to do that?" Yusuke asked.
"Well, I think that if they are happy, they will have no reason to betray the Reikai, right?" Botan said.
"Well, yeah, but Kurama seems happy the way he is. But Hiei, he's another story. I mean, only blood and power would make him happy, right?" Yusuke said.
"What keeps humans and demons happy?" Botan asked them.
"Uh... money, power, cool items, drugs, alcohol –" Yusuke started.
"NO! Love!" Botan exclaimed.
"Demons can love?" Kuwabara asked.
"Of course! It's only when they can't find love that they're so destructive. Few demons find love, that's why most are believed to be incapable of loving." Botan said.
"Alright, so we just get them some hot chicks. Wow, this has been the easiest mission yet." Yusuke said.
"Why should we find girls, when they already have someone they love?" Botan said. Yusuke gave her a weird look. He walked closer to Botan and whispered in her ear.
"Kurama probably likes one of those girls in his school, but Hiei? I know he loves Yukina, but he can't have that kind of relationship with her. I mean, she's hot, but she's his sister." Yusuke whispered. Botan slammed her oar on his head.
"No, hentai! Not her! They love each other!" Botan exclaimed.
"What?!?! They're GAY?!" Kuwabara screeched. Yusuke didn't seem shocked.
"Well, now that I think about it, it is pretty obvious. I mean, they're always together. And Hiei never seems to mind when Kurama touches him. If it were one of us, he would have killed us." Yusuke said.
"What? But I thought they were just best friends." Kuwabara said.
"Oh, come on Kuwa-chan. It's so apparent!" Botan said.
"Well, I mean, yeah. They're always standing near each other. And they kind of look at each other all weird." Kuwabara said.
"Kind of like how you look at Yukina without the drool?" Yusuke asked.
"Shut up, Urameshi! Hey, wait, we're supposed to help those two....... get.... together?" Kuwabara asked.
"Yes! If they're happy, they won't betray you. I mean, think about during battle. Would you want to fight against Hiei and Kurama?" Botan asked. Yusuke and Kuwabara pondered for a moment. They both always seemed to fight in sync with each other and their attacks can sometimes be very vicious.
"Alright, Botan, we'll carry out this mission." Yusuke said.
"Good! And let's do it fast so I can get back at Koenma." Botan said.
"Huh?" the boys asked.
"Never mind, just complete the mission."
X X X X X X X X X X X X X X X