Disclaimer: I do not own YuYu Hakusho. That means no Hiei, Yusuke, Kurama, Kuwabara or Koenma or any of the other gorgeous anime guys that are featured on this show. They (and of their lucky anime girlfriends) all belong to Mr. Togashi. And now that I am thoroughly depressed, I think I'll just toddle off to bed with a huge quart of rocky-road ice cream.
With plushies.
Warning: May be OOC at some point but I'm going to try REALLY hard to make sure that they're all in character. There is NO Kuwabara bashing in this story unless it's just Yusuke or Hiei being themselves. I happen to respect Kuwabara and I hope that I don't get any flames just because I refuse to bash him. Also, some spoilers...a few vague references to the Makai Tournament and the Sensui Arc.
AHHH! An OOC Hiei! I AM SORRY T-T.
Italics are Hiei's thoughts. Don't worry, context will tell you who's talking when.
Emotional Distress
by bittersweet-memory
"You're WHAT?"
Botan shifted uneasily under Keiko's intense scrutiny.
"I-I'm pregnant."
She turned to Kurama and Hiei with alarm apparent in her eyes. She didn't want Koenma to find out. He had made his decision and she refused to be with someone who didn't want her. Not to mention the fact that she didn't much care for him either at the moment.
Didn't she?
"You three have to promise me right now that what I tell you won't go beyond this backyard."
Keiko stubbornly stuck out her bottom lip and Botan wondered if what Yusuke said about her being "completely impossible" wasn't half true.
"That depends on what you tell us Botan. The only person you should be thinking about is this child and if it's better for him or her that Koenma knows then I can't make any promises."
Botan sighed and bowed her head. Keiko was right. It was terribly selfish of her to keep this from Koenma. But when he told her about Ayame...
"Here's the deal. I'll tell you everything. Then you can help me decide what in the world I'm going to do."
She turned to Kurama and Hiei with an apologetic look. She knew she could trust them both with her life (albeit Hiei was a little cold), but this was something she wanted only Keiko to know right now.
"Would you boys mind? I promise that if I decide to tell everyone, you'll have first dibs."
Kurama nodded. He could only imagine how difficult this was going to be for her and he respected her privacy. He'd gotten the answer to the question he'd been wondering about the whole day, and that was enough for now.
"All right Botan. And you don't have to worry, Hiei and I keep very good secrets."
She turned her eyes to Hiei, who had been watching her with a strange sort of intensity that she'd found a bit uncomfortable. He looked away, preventing her from seeing what little emotion he allowed himself to express. As Kurama made a move to go inside, he gave her a reassuring smile.
"If you ever need anything Botan, please know that I will offer whatever assistance I can."
She gave him a weak smile in response.
"Thank you Kurama. And don't worry; you won't have to keep this secret for long. Shizuru and Yukina will be out here as soon as you go back inside."
Hiei slipped away when he was certain no one would notice. Kurama and Botan were still talking below him, as he watched from his vantage point on his favorite tree. So the ferry girl was pregnant...
Hiei honestly didn't care. It was none of his business either way and the only reason he stayed for the answer to Kurama's question was because of his damnable curiosity. Having never been the recipient of what romantics called "love" and jaded cynics called "slow suicide", he was fascinated by its manifestation. And a child was the perfect example of it. The unborn child's situation vaguely resembled his own. If Koenma ever found out, there was not doubt he would take the child from her, like the village of the Koorime had done to his own mother. Illegitimate though he or she was, if Koenma's fiancée proved to be...infertile, then the ferry-girl's...Botan's child would be the heir to the throne of the Spirit World.
Quite a pickle.
Though he would die under duress of extreme torture rather then admit it, he felt an odd sort of kinship with the unborn. Not that he or she would be unwanted, like Hiei had been unwanted, of course. The baby would be a stigma. Someone to be spoken about in whispers accompanied by the waggling eyebrows and pointed fingers. He knew what that was like.
He would ask Murkuro for a "vacation". She had more then enough soldiers to patrol his areas. He would satisfy his curiosity about "love" and note the reactions of mother and child. Then he would leave unnoticed and go back to his life in the Demon World.
It would be research, he decided.
True to Botan's prediction, five minutes after Kurama left, Shizuru and Yukina came rushing out. No doubt Yusuke and Kuwabara wanted to find out what the hell was going on. She could only hope Kurama found some way to keep them distracted.
Shizuru threw a glare at Botan.
"Why the hell didn't you tell us earlier?!"
That was all it took before she broke down crying again. Yukina got the four fold-up chairs that were leaning against the solid structure of the house and set them up in a three-to-one fashion. Her subtle way of showing that there would be no escape for Botan this time. She gave herself up to the inevitable and after they were all seated, she began her story.
"Well, I don't think I'll have to tell you how it happened. I mean, well...you know. The important thing is, I found out when I was on my vacation. I was so excited about telling him too."
She sniffled, once. Twice.
Keiko fumbled for her handkerchief in the dark and handed it to Botan.
"Well anyway... I'm pretty sure you're all thinking that it's impossible for non-corporeal bodies to get pregnant. And you're right. It is. But don't forget that I do have my human form....and well..."
She blushed in the dark and Shizuru shook her head. Yukina was rapt with attention, grabbing onto Botan's hand and squeezing every few seconds in a sign of reassurance. Keiko's hormonal imbalance was making her switch between sorrow for her friend and intense hatred for anything male.
"How far along are you Botan? And why isn't it showing?"
"Hmmm...Let's see. It's July now. I was on vacation in May...so about nine weeks, give or take a few days."
"Well that's something at least. But you're going to show pretty soon. What are you planning to do?"
"Let me finish the story first."
Now that it was out in the open, Botan couldn't stop the words from coming out. She'd kept this a secret for two whole months and she had to tell someone.
"Well anyway, when I got back to the Spirit World, I was so happy. I mean, this would bring us closer then we ever had been before. So I walked into his office, expecting anything else from what he had waiting for me. He told me, he was sorry. He told me, he had fallen for someone new. And that he still loved me, but not the way I loved him. He gave me the proverbial 'it's not you, it's me' speech."
Keiko's knuckles were so white, that the armrest she was squeezing actually squeaked in protest. Shizuru had started muttering underneath her breath and the tiny "clinks" told her that Yukina was not unaffected by her story.
"I was in shock. I couldn't say anything. My thoughts were in a jumble and my jaw went slack. I couldn't believe what the hell I was hearing. I made up my mind then and there that I wasn't going to tell him. I couldn't. How the hell was I supposed to react? So I smiled, and told him it was probably for the best. I congratulated Ayame. Looking back now, he probably wondered why I was so complacent. "
She was crying now, for the third time that day.
"I hate to say it. But it gave me a sick sort of pleasure to know something he didn't. Something I know, he'd like to know about. Something I'll keep secret for as long as I can."
The wind blew through the trees but aside from that, and the clink of tear gems, there was silence.
Then Keiko brushed away her tears and grabbed Botan's hand. Yukina gathered up the gems she had cried and Shizuru smoked a cigarette, still cursing the idiocy and density of the male gender.
"You're staying here with me and Yusuke, Botan. That's all there is to it. I refuse to let you go back there. Koenma had better hide if he doesn't want his ass kicked."
Botan looked at her with pleading eyes.
"Don't judge him so harshly. I'm sure some of the fights were my fault. And plus, there is that teeny-tiny matter of me not telling him I'm pregnant. He'll never forgive me if he does find out."
"How can you defend him? He's a spoiled, selfish bastard who broke your heart!"
"I honestly don't know Shizuru. I don't even know how I feel about him sometimes. All I do know, is that I don't want him coming back to me just because this child needs a 'father'—"
"If the rest of the guys ever find out, he or she will have four of 'em."
Keiko stood up and smoothed down her dress.
"Then it's settled. You're staying here. Just tell the toddler that you're on unofficial leave. If he asks why...then tell him Keiko said so."
"Keiko said what?"
All four girls turned to find Yusuke leaning casually against the doorway.
Ten minutes later, he was seething.
They refused to tell him what was going on! Keiko had only glared at him and insisted that Botan would be staying with them for the next couple of months. He had agreed, figuring that the break-up had taken its toll on her.
He had no idea...
Koenma shifted uneasily in the love seat next to Ayame. The only people inside were Kuwabara and Kurama. Where the heck had everybody gone?
A few minutes later, Keiko reappeared. She shot a vicious death-glare that would have made even Hiei cringe and sat down across from him, muttering choice expletives. He chuckled. Yusuke was in deep trouble for something. He looked at the woman sitting beside him. She was different from the others he had known in his life. She was calm and clear, like a tall glass of cool water in the desert. So unlike Botan, with her expressive face and often loud antics. Although, he would admit, there were times he missed the bubbly cheer. Botan had gotten unbelievably quiet since her vacation in the human world. Her eyes lost a bit of their sparkle and there was no longer the customary "bounce" in her step. He brushed off any feelings of guilt. It couldn't have been his fault. She had told him it was "okay", that she was "fine".
And that was that.
Yusuke Urameshi might have been what some considered stupid in the classroom, but he definitely wasn't stupid in the proverbial game of life. He knew when there were bad signs in the woodwork and his living room was full of it tonight. For one thing, all of the girls (except for Botan), were impaling Koenma with harsh stares. Even Yukina, who never had anything bad to say about anything, was frowning at him. Next to him, Keiko was muttering something about "castration" and "lack of manly honor". Kuwabara was shifting his eyes from Ayame to Botan, and Yusuke could tell that his friend was mentally comparing the two women. Kurama was reading his book and Shizuru was making stilted conversation with Ayame. Hiei, had yet to return from wherever the hell he had disappeared to.
All in all, it was very suspicious behavior.
And Yusuke's former detective instincts were kicking in, demanding he solve the case.
"Koenma, could I talk to you for a moment?"
He turned to Botan in question.
"Can't it wait Botan? I have to be home by bed time. You know that! Dad gets very angry if I'm not in bed by 12:00."
A low rumbling sound was heard in the vicinity of his right side and he turned to see Keiko fairly foaming at the mouth. He really felt for Yusuke right now.
"Please Koenma sir, it will only take a few moments."
He didn't know why he agreed. Maybe it was because something inside him didn't want to leave yet so soon. Maybe it was because he was delaying telling his father that he would soon be having an heir. But more then likely, Koenma thought, it was the fact that Botan's voice was void of all cheer. She spoke like she was going to her execution.
"Oh fine!"
She led him out to the backyard and paused, unsure, as if she didn't know what to say.
"Koenma-sir—"
"Botan, a few months ago, we were more then friends. You don't have to add the 'sir' anymore. You know that."
She repeated his name with the sir, as though he hadn't even spoken. It...hurt him for some reason. With all the commotion over proposing to Ayame, he had never once considered the fact that Botan would revert back to her more formal way of addressing him. With that single word, she had replaced the barrier that kept them separate. Once again, they were no longer lovers. They weren't even friends. Now they were just employer and employee...
He broke off from his train of thought when he realized that she had been saying something and he hadn't been paying attention.
"...leave of absence?"
"What?"
"Koenma sir, you haven't been listening to a word I've been saying have you?"
Her hand came up to flick his nose in a familiar fashion when it froze mid-air, as though she suddenly remembered who she was and who he was and what they were to each other now. She allowed her hand to fall limply back to her side.
"I asked you for a leave of absence."
"What for? I gave you a vacation a few months ago."
She averted her eyes.
"Well, that is..."
"She's going to help me take care of the baby."
They both turned to Keiko who was watching Koenma with subtle distaste.
"Will that be all right Koenma sir?"
"But you have Shizuru and Yukina here to help you—"
"I want Botan here too."
He looked at Yusuke, who had seemingly appeared out of nowhere and was now standing near Keiko. He shrugged helplessly. He knew when it was a bad time to make Keiko angry and this definitely qualified.
"Sorry toddler. I can't help you here."
He turned back to Botan, frantic. For some reason he didn't care to think about, he didn't like the idea of her here in the human world where she could get hurt. Or worse.
Where she could fall in love. (1)
He suddenly thought of the perfect excuse.
"What about your routes? Who will take over?"
Keiko answered for her friend, turning another glare at him.
"Why don't you get Ayame to arrange that? I mean, she is head ferry-girl now isn't she? Not Botan anymore right? This is her job."
Ayame, who had stepped outside in looking for Koenma cringed at the anger in Keiko's voice when the brunette had said her name. She looked at Botan, and back again at her fiancé. She had been rather wary of Botan and her relationship with Koenma. There were times even now, that his eyes would glaze over and he would lose himself. No doubt caught in one of his memories with her. She saw Botan's leave as a perfect excuse to reestablish her claim on Koenma. Not to mention, as uncomfortable as she was with Botan and Koenma's prior involvement, Botan was her friend. And she had been looking rather peaked.
"Koenma, why don't you just let her have the time? I'm sure we can find someone to take her place."
He fought with himself. He knew it was over with him and Botan, and it was unfair to Ayame to continue to think her in this way but he couldn't help it. A part of him still had feelings for her. And it was that part that gave him the final push.
"All right."
Up in his tree, Hiei released the breath he didn't realize he had been holding. After all, his study wouldn't be very successful without a subject right?
(1) Am I the only one who thinks that Koenma isn't being just a tad bit selfish? –,-
Oh and if their feelings are seem all mumbled and mixed up, remember the title of the story! Emotional Distress. It'll be a while before any of them get how they feel straight. Not to mention Botan's hormones now....
Review Responses
(hands out various articles of Hiei's clothing....teehee)
Grim: Thanks! Here's your update!
BlazingBotan Hehe. Indeed, the HB will be fun to write but since I'm trying to keep them in character, the only thing you're going to be getting (for a while) are little snippets. Still, I'll try to incorporate as many as I can!
tuathafaerie O.O....(bows before the HB goddess) I am extremely happy you decided to review! It's an honor.... (weeps) I hope you enjoyed this update. The story might get a little angsty. But the romance is coming never fear!
Pocky-and-Fred: O.O (bows again). Love Is in The Air is wonderful! (sniffles) and you were the 20th person to add me to the faves list! You rock! Oh and it took me about.....30 minutes to type that up but I had to really check it over and even then I saw I made mistakes....-,-.
Bar-Ohki: It was evil of Koenma? I wasn't sure who you were talking about (because I am dense). I hope you enjoy this update anyway!
Read and Review darling readers!