Chapter 11 ~ To Confess...Or Not To Confess

The rest of the day was positively wretched. Now, along with not talking to them, Lily entirely avoided being in the same room with the boys, especially Sirius.
Sirius would see her very seldom, and when he did, he really wished he hadn't. Snape never seemed to leave her side unless he had to, and it was spine-chilling to see such a thing. Sirius even got up early one morning and sat in the common room, waiting for her to come down so he could just get a decent glimpse of her, but she never left her room! She stayed there the whole day, most likely crying becuase he could occasionally hear her muffled sobs.
He couldn't stand it, fighting with her, and apparently, neither could she.
He had stayed in the common room for 10 straight hours, waiting for her and doing everything imaginable to keep himself from being bored to death. Finally, his friends came to relieve him of his idleness.
"Hello? Sirius?" Remus was waving his hand 3 inches from Sirius' face which was studying a chess board. "Earth to Sirius! This is Houston. We have a problem. Oh no! MAYDAY MAYDAY!!! CRASH!!!....sorry man...you're now dead..."
Sirius jumped at all the sound effects he was making. "Oh...sorry."
"We haven't seen you all day!"
"Yeah, I've been doing...uh...homework," he lied.
"Whatever, we have to go now if we're going to go explore the castle and ransack the Slytherin locker room." James grinned evilly.
"Oh! I forgot!" He shot out of the chair, knocking over the chess set. "Let's go!"
It had been 3 days since the 'potion mishap' and still, Sirius felt he could have killed himself. His grief was so immense, that if it wasn't for the boys cheering him up and his snowball fights against the wimpy Snape, he probably would have. James and Remus seemed to be able to tell that something was wrong, but they didn't ask, and Sirius was grateful. He was going to tell them...just not yet. If he did, then he wouldn't have ANY friends. He was so STUPID for getting in this situation in the first place.
There was less than two days until the rest of the school would return when Dumbledore had come back to the castle. It was abnormal for him to ever leave in the first place. Leaving for 4 days was just plain suspicious.
'I wonder what the ministry is up to and what part Dumbledore has to play in it...' Sirius questioned himself.

"May I have your atttention please?" Dumbledore stood up and said, quieter than usual since there were only about 30 students there. "I have a very important announcment which I am not very happy to make."
Everyone immediately quit everything and leaned forward to listen.
"Something of great importance has been stolen from my office! Something so powerful, it could destroy a person's mind. This is a terrible, terrible act and I pray that whoever has it, had kept is safe and untampered with. If not, I pity that person because he or she can not comprehend the severity of the situation and the pain they have inflicted upon the person it was used upon."
Everyone gasped, wide-eyed, and wondered what it could possibly be that was stolen.
It was evident that Dumbledore was both furious and terrified, for the twinkle in his eyes had been replaced with petrifying, cold stones. "I have a hunch who the theif is and if they come to my office and admit to the whole thing, that person will not have nearly as great of a chance of getting fired from their teaching position or expelled from this school. Whoever you are, you have 2 days...until all the students return." He sat.
There was an instant wave of conversation, all about the same thing: "Who did it?"
'Oh my god, what am I going to do? If I tell him, I'll probably be expelled and my parents would murder me. If I don't, Dumbledore would most likely find out anyway and expell me. Plus, Lily may be in danger. Maybe using a love potion is more complicated than I thought. Dumbledore was really scared, it seemed. For all I know, Lily's life may be at stake...but perhaps Dumbledore was just putting on an act, making me believe it was dangerous, just to get me to fess up. But then again, I may have a chance of not getting expelled if I tell. A slim chance, but a chance none-the-less. And Lily is so important to me! I don't want anything to happen to her...but she can't be in any real danger, can she?...WHAT AM I GOING TO DO!?!?'

It was breakfast and Lily hadn't left her room in...she checked her clock...32 hours. This was depressing. She had stayed in there the whole time, doing nothing but reading book after book, imagining herself as one of the characters in the story who's problems always seemed less agonizing than her own. There was an occassional tear every now and then too.
"How can someone be so cruel? Is he trying to drive me so insane that I eventually have to be taken away to a mental institute in a straight jacket? Well, if he keeps this up, I'll be there in no time. But how could he say such a thing to me: That I belong in Slytherin? Speaking of insanity...he should be shipped off to St. Brutus' School for Incurably Criminal Boys in a holeless crate and kept in a circular padded room once he got there.
"Does he not realize what he's doing to me mind? I miss all 4 of them. I miss you Sirius, James, Remus, and Peter. ARGH! They're playing with me like I'm a marionette! Well not anymore. I need to pull myself together and quit worrying about the stupidity of men. They'll come to their senses...well...what senses they have. Plus, like I promised 'ol Jiminy Crikit back there, I have to get my school marks up."
'Ah-hah! Right you are! Perhaps I'm not the only smart thing up here in this head of yours!'
"Oh no...not the voice."
'Yes, it's the voice!'
"Dun dun dun...well, this doens't mean I'm going to make up and start talking to them. Not until they apologize first. I have nothing to be sorry for."
The voice sighed. 'Oh fine. I assume that's the most decent answer I'll ever get from you. I'll be around! Tata.'
"Whatever, if the time comes that I'll ever need your 'assistance', I'll whistle, Jiminy."
'Will you stop calling me that!?'

Later that day:

"Hey 'ol buddy! 'Ol pal!"
"Hey James," Sirius replied.
"C'mon! Lily and Snape are outside. Peter, Remus, and I are going to throw a massive snowball...well, maybe an icechunk....at him just for the heck of it. Whatcha say?"
He was so stupidly excited that Sirius admitted to himself that it was almost worth laughing over. "Naw...not today."
James was dumbstruck. "You've gotta be kidding."
"No, I'm just not in the 'Terrorize Snape' mood."
"Something on your mind?"
"More like something's shredding my helpless mind to smithereens."
"Does that 'something' have red hair and an uncontrollable temper?"
"More or less."
James nodded. "Ooooh! I get the picture. Just don't do anything that I wouldn't do...like apologize. She'll come back admitting that she blew up on us for no reason. She needs us. It's only a matter of time before she realizes that. Don't worry about it! You're really ruining all the fun we could be having!"
"Thanks for that James..." Sirius replied sarcastically. "I think I'll go to the library now."
"The library!?!?" James gasped as Sirius walked off. "She's demented his poor, defensless, little brain!"
"Finally!" Sirius was relieved to be by himself again. He need to be alone so he could actually think. He had only one day to decide whether he was going to tell Dumbledore what happened or not, and he was no closer to making that decision than what he was early this morning. "What to do...what to do..."
He had just walked past one of the grand windows when something outside caught his eye: Lily and Snape building a snowman.

Outside:

"The head needs to be smaller, Severus," Lily observed.
"What do you mean? It's perfect!" He set the ball a-top the snowman's middle.
She went into a fit of giggles. "It's bigger than the bottom!"
"Well, that means it's smart. It has a lot of brains."
"Or perhaps it's a complete airhead...like someone I know..." As she said this, 4 boys came strolling, unwanted, into her memory again, but she chose to ignore it.
This made Snape laugh. "Dont' think about them."
"I know, but it's really hard. It's Christmas and I can't help remembering when our parents stuck James and I under the mistletoe last year...we hated eachother back then just as much as we do now."
Snape looked nauseated at the thought of her and James kissing.
"They did give me presents, you know."
"You're joking, right?"
"I wish I were...I got a bracelet, two books, chocolate, and Sirius even got me a locket necklace with a picture of us at the Halloween Ball in it."
Snape shivvered in shock. "I hope you threw it away."
"Of course not! I just can't get myself to look at it."
"Well...would you look at this?"
Lily turned to him, just in time to see a snowball hurtling through the air right at her. She, in turn, tackled him to the ground.

Inside:

Sirius stood motionless, for he couldn't get himself to tear his eyes away from what he was witnessing, even though it made his insides cringe: Lily and Snape rolling around in the snow.
This was it. He had made up his mind. He just couldn't stand to see Lily falling in love with Snape. If only it could have been ANYONE except Snape...even Peter would have been ok! Maybe...just maybe...Dumbledore would have something to stop the love potion's effects. He knew he'd probably get expelled, but he just couldn't let Lily fall into the arms of a snake. He was going to confess.
The hallways of the castle tend to be longer when walking through them nervously, and for Sirius, 'nervous' was the LARGE understatement. It seemed that he'd never reach Dumbledore's office.
"Ok, I'm gonna be ok...I have to do this...there's no backing out of this now...This is for the good of Lily...and hopefully me as well...AHH! SIRIUS! Stop biting your nails!" He scolded himself. "You're going to confess whether you like it or not...That's all there is too it...Oh no, I'm here...Stomach, don't fail me now! If you can eat an extra-large pizza and 2 pounds of chocolate in 30 minutes, then you can handle this without getting sick..."
He had arrived at the gargoyle statue and was really considering turning back. On top of everything, his stomach was tossing and turning, threatening to get Filch really riled up when he saw the mess he'd make. For once, though, his better judgement got the better of him.
"Ok...ummm...password...Candy! What's his favorite candy?...AHH! How would I know this!? Err...chocolate frog?"
The gargoyle shifted to reveal a door.
"Wow...lucky first guess."
He entered the headmaster's office to find Dumbledore reading a book written by a man by the name of 'Nicholas Flamel'. "Why hello Mr. Black! Please, take a seat."
Sirius sat and stirred uneasily in his chair.
"Now, what brings you here?"
"I...uh...I stole the jar from you office, Professor. I'm really sorry," He said slowly, examining his sneakers. This was one of those times that you don't want to discover the expression on the face of the person you're talking to.
"Ahh...I see."
"Well, I've told you, so I guess I should write mum and hope that she doesn't literally die when I tell her I've been expelled halfway through my first year." Sirius admitted to himself outloud.
"Expelled? No, no my boy! It was very wise of you to come in here and admit to your fault. I knew it was you, but if you wouldn't have been honest, I probably would have expelled you. You do not know the greatness of that of which you have stolen. Your honesty has kept you a seat here at Hogwarts. That is one of life's many lessons to be learned."
"Oh thank Merlin..." Sirius relaxed a little bit once he heard that. At least he wasn't being kicked out. "Thank you sir."
"You're very welcome. I must tell you that I now have a great respect for you. I haven't met too many students that would have confessed to a matter such as this." He smiled. "Now, you can return to your common room, once you return the jar, please."
Uh-oh...this was the part he was dreading worst of all. "Well, you see sir..." Sirius explained EVERYTHING to him: Lily's vow of silence, her hanging out with his worst enemy, him getting jealous, him finding and stealing the potion, Vinnie putting it in his goblet, and the events of this morning. "So, I came down this morning and Lily was sitting in my seat next to Snape. She had drank the love potion and now she's going to fall in love with Snape." He buried his face in his hands. "And it's all my fault."
"Oh dear...this can not be happening...dear Merlin..." Dumbledore's heart started to race, and that wasn't good for an old man such as himself. It was just as he feared. Why had he left the jar in plain sight? He really couldn't blame Sirius for taking it...and now Lily was in mortal danger. He took a deep breath. "That was no love potion..."
Sirius sighed in relief. "Well, at least that's out of the way. She won't fall in love with Snape!"
There are not words to express how Dumbledore felt right now. "Miss Evans and Mr. Snape falling in love would be a heavenly scenario compared to what's really going on." This was the closest Sirius had ever seen Dumbledore to crying. "I can't believe this is happening..."
"Sir, maybe if you gave me a clue as to what's so bad, maybe I could...help."
Dumbledore attempted a smile, yet failed altogether. "That is why I like you: always willing to help, no matter how much worse the situation could get, and for us, going farther downhill is close to impossible. I suppose I must tell you the truth instead of making you wonder for the rest of your life, even though I'm going against my conscience."
Sirius mentally prepared himself for the worst.
"First, you must swear on my life and yours that you will never tell a soul about what we about about to discuss. Not Lily, not your parents, not your best friends, NOBODY. It could put Lily in more danger than she already is."
"Yes sir, I swear."
"Good, now I will continue. That jar, the one I most carelessly looked after, had a smudged label. You, thinking it was a love potion, took it when indeed, it was a life potion."
"A life potion!? You can be serious!"
"Unfortunately, yes. That is the reality of the situation."
"Ok, so apparently, Lily's going to live forever. Where is the problem in that?"
"My friend, Nicolas Flamel, and I are have been working on the creation of the Elixir of Life for our whole lives since we graduated from Hogwarts. Flamel discovered the key element a few days ago. He's tested it over and over, and it truly works. He gave it to me to hide. I was on my way to Diagon Alley to put it in Gringotts when I noticed it was stolen from my cabinet where I foolishly left it."
Sirius was still waiting for an answer to his question.
"I have recently received word that a dark lord has been rising in the east, gathering as many followers as he can. He is seeking power and eternal life. There is a way that Lily's elixir can be given to someone else, but I'm not sure how. He's killed and tortured many people, and Lily, being now immortal, is a sure target if he ever found out about her. She would be a great ally to him. That is why she is in danger.
Sirius couldn't believe what he was hearing. He had put everyone clost to Lily in mortal danger. If this 'dark lord' ever found out, he'd do whatever he could to get to Lily, and even though she couldn't die, she's probably be tortured.
"And when Lily is tortured or experiences pain, the pain is doubled from what any normal person would feel. That is the price of living forever. Just because she can't die, doesn't mean she can't can't be immensly tortured to the brink of death."
Sirius was fighting back tears. His ignorance had done this to her. "Are you going to tell her, so she'll be aware of what could happen?"
"I don't think that right now is a good time. She seems to be low on self-esteem lately. I will tell her when the time is right."
"Ok."
"Mr. Black?"
"Hmmm?"
"Remember, not a word of this to anyone and please don't go suicidal on me. It's not entirely your fault. It is mostly mine."
"Curiosity killed the cat," Sirius mumbled.
"And intelligence sparks the curious mind."
"Intelligent is the last thing I can think of to describe myself at this point, Headmaster."
"Tis true, possibly...but I think this incident was more of a whim of fate. The elixir wanted Lily. If it wanted you to be its bearer, Lily wouldn't have been coincidently sitting in your seat this morning. Your alarm clock would have woken you up early."
"That doesn't make the situation any better."
"No, it doesn't, but it does help in convincing yourself that nothing can get in the way of destiny. Even though this is a disaster, nothing can get in the way of destiny. What will happen, will happen, whether we like it or not. The only thing we have power over is how we deal with what has been given to us."
"So what are you saying I should do?"
"I am implying that you, James, and Remus need to do something to win back her friendship. She is going to really need some emotional support soon and you three are the only ones who can truely give her what she needs. You are the ones who must help her win this life-long losing battle."
"Yes sir." Sirius grinned weakly. "I'll just leave now. I need to think."
"A wise decision. Goodbye Mr. Black. Let us hope that our next meeting be more cheerful. And considering the present cir stances, I think it goes without saying that you are up to a week's worth of detention starting tomorrow evening. Goodbye."