Disclaimer: Basically, anyone/anything you recognize from the Harry Potter Books, are/is not mine but are the product of the amazing imagination of JK Rowling!
Chapter Four, Coming Your Way! FYI, this chapter takes place from December to June.
Oh Yeah! Snickers for Christy, who came up with the title!
Chapter Four: Flickering Façade
Time seemed to absolutely fly by and before Charli, or anyone else knew it, it was Christmas. Or should we say, time-to-get-all-the-stuff-up-for-Yule up. For Charli, this was not fun. She hated Christmas. Every Christmas, she never got anything, anything from anyone. Because frankly, no one gave a damn that she existed. On Christmas morning, she wasn't expecting to find anything by her bed, but much to her surprise there was -- a small box. Gingerly she picked it up and her eyes skimmed the note.
Charli,
You know there's something there.
-SB
Her brow furrowed when she read this, but she opened the small green box anyhow. Inside was the most beautiful necklace she had ever seen in her life; the chain was silver, either that or white gold, with a silver/white gold scorpion charm that had small yellow topaz's for eyes. She walked into the bathroom and put it on, staring at her reflection. She was getting ready to head down the steps, when she realized that she couldn't let him know that she was wearing it, and quickly hid it beneath her shirt. When she went down the steps, she saw Sirius sitting there on a couch and froze like an ice cube. He looked up when he heard her, and his gaze flickered immediately towards where her necklace should have been, and his frown was so obvious when he didn't see it there.
"Hey." He said softly, while getting up and walking over to her. She managed a squeaky 'hi' in response, her voice leaving her with him being so close. "I knew I forgot something." He said, and turned, walking up the steps to the boy's dorm. On some strange impulse, Charli followed him, and ended up in his dormitory, to see Sirius rummaging around in his trunk.
"W-What are you looking for?" she asked, her voice starting to fail her again.
"Looking for the necklace."
"You mean..." she said, and pulled out the necklace from beneath her shirt. "This one?" he looked up and his eyes widened a bit when he saw her holding it up.
"You're actually wearing it?" he asked, a bit surprised, and she nodded.
"Chars..." he started to say, but trailed off, stepping towards her, and she took a step back away from him into the wall.
"Sirius, please... don't..." She was trying to tell him, put he silenced her by encasing her lips with his, and she couldn't help by sigh in contentment, or kissing him back for that matter. She knew she shouldn't be doing it, but she just couldn't contain herself. She knew for a fact that Sirius wasn't just kissing her because no girl would take him, because truth is Sirius has hoards of girls waiting on his hand and foot. Sirius had her pinned against the wall, and was kissing her fiercely and was tugging at her shirt, trying to get it off. In the end, he succeeded and both he and Charli gave into lust... or love.
Charli woke up to feel someone pressed against her, and memories came flooding back. She shot straight up in Sirius's bed, waking him up.
"What wrong babe?" he asked, blinking sleepily at her frantic and rigid form.
"What wrong? What's wrong?" she hissed, as she got out of the bed and started to put her clothes back on. "I just did the stupidest thing that I could have ever possibly done!"
"Huh?" he asked, still half asleep.
"You... and... me... earlier.." she said, trying to get him to understand.
"How was that the worst thing you could ever have done?" he asked, not understanding how being with him was like, a mortal sin.
"I have to go... and I need you to stay away from me." She said this, and was rather pained. But girls like her couldn't be with guys like him, because he didn't support the Dark Lord, whereas she was training to become a Death Eater and would initiated in April. It just wouldn't work out, no matter how much she happened to love him. Wait, Love... since when do I love him? She thought, her mind going into frantic mode. I lust after him, not love him. Never love, that's a emotion I cannot feel.
Charli avoided any situation with Sirius Black from then on. She wasn't paying attention to anything but her studies at that point, and three months later she was surprised when she started to throw up constantly, and couldn't eat any of her favorite foods without feeling as if she was about to barf again. Lily, of all people, finally made her go and see Madame Pomphrey in the Hospital Wing.
"Dear, when was the last time you got your period?" the nurse asked, and Charli looked at her, shocked.
"I don't know... three months ago?" she thought back.
"Well then, I'm going to tell you something, and you better sit back down." The nurse stated, and she took a seat. "Ms. Leliam, you are three months pregnant."
Charli stared at her in complete and utter shock, Pregnant? Just positively absolutely wonderful.
"How am I supposed to hide that?" she asked, exasperated, and Madame Pomphrey gave her a concealment charm, that she would have to start using soon, and gave her some things to help her 'morning sickness'. One thing Charli had learned was that morning sickness was poorly named. It does not indeed happen just in the morning, but all day long. Once a month she had to go to the Hospital Wing to get a 'checkup' and make sure everything was fine. And then there was DE training, once a week at Midnight, in a field near Hogsmeade. That was a killer for her, really. You try running around and curing and hexing people while dodging they're curses and hexes when you are pregnant. Soon enough, it was initiation time. Charli, along with Jake Flint, Severus Snape, Lucius Malfoy, Kalasin Keely, Ashton Bulstrode, Larainia Colgeste, and Amanda Spellings we're all being initiated that night. It was done alphabetically so naturally she was second-to-last. She gasped in pain when the dark mark was burned upon her skin, it didn't hurt as much as she thought it would though. Then, in front of everyone he just had to announce it.
"So, Leliam. Who's the father?" the Dark Lord asked her, and she stared at him.
"I-I-I d-don't want t-to s-s-say, Milord." She stammered, and he had a bemused expression on his face, you could tell, despite his hood.
"Oh Really?"
"Yes, really." She said, and quickly added a 'milord.' He laughed, and she stared at her feet. After the ceremony was over, and she was in the Common Room, Sirius came down. She pretended not to see him, but he saw right through her façade.
"Where were you?" he asked and she stared at him, and she subconsciously rubbed her right arm, where her dark mark was. He frowned and sat next to her, and his frown grew deeper when he felt her tense.
"What's wrong with your arm?" she asked as he started to roll up her sleeve and she heard him gasp.
"Nothing wrong with it, you dolt." She said, rolling her sleeve back down.
"You're a death eater!" he practically screeched at the top of his lungs, and she quickly covered his mouth with her hand.
"Shut up, you moron!" she hissed. "Tell the world why don't you?"
Sirius started to say something, but Charli cut him off.
"I'm going to bed." She announced and walked up the steps to the Girls Dormitory.
CHARLI'S M Personal P O V
Great Goddess, what have I gotten myself into? I sit here, in my bed at Hogwarts, staring at my dark mark. I put my hand on my stomach, and feel my child kick. I know it is a girl, by some strange sense. I shall name her Valkaryie. I will not give her the last name Black, but she will have mine instead. Valkaryie Elizabeth Leliam, will be her full name. Her middle name shall be that of my mother. A thought strikes me out of the blue, I cannot hang out with Riles anymore. She, like her brother and father, will fight against my master. Looks like my new best friends are Kally, Manda, and Rina. It's not like my life isn't already in the dumps anyway. Sometimes, secretly, I think of slitting my wrists, hanging myself, or blasting my brains out, anything to stop the pain. But I can't bring myself to do it, for the sake of my little girl who is still unborn. She is due in August, which is four months from now. I am dying to see what she looks like. Will she look like me, or will she look like Sirius? Will she become cold, and numb like me? Or will she be warm, laughing, and full of energy and life... like Sirius? I sigh, and close my eyes. The only place that I am happy, and the only place where I feel safe are in my dreams. I control them, they do not control me. I can dream of Sirius, I can dream of my daughter, or better yet, I dream of my own Mother and Father, the Mother and Father who are dead do not normally invade my dreams, but tonight I want them to. Tonight is the night I tell them who and what I have become. Ghosts of my past cannot hurt me, no matter how much I screw up and disappoint them. They are the dead, and they have no effect on me.
Back to Normal
It was the end of May, and Voldemort was planning an attack on Hogwarts. Charli couldn't wait, although she wasn't one hundred percent sure why. She was pretty sure it was because she got a chance to be important. Yet, she was not allowed to partake in the battle, so she would not damage her child. The Dark Lord wanted to use her daughter for his own purposes when she was to come of age. Secretly, she didn't want her child to end up like her; she wanted her child to have a good life. One not full of so much hate, and other things that a kid shouldn't have to worry about.
She sighed, and took a seat next to Rina on the ground. They were in front of the invisible gates that guard Hogwarts from intruders, ready to open them. And in five minutes, that moment came. Charli, Rina, Manda, and Kally somehow managed to get the gates open, and then Charli ran into the school. Her master told her to stay up in her dormitory, until it was all over. He would not risk the life of her child. Not because he actually cared about the child, of course. She sat there, frozen in her bed. What had she done? Thank Mithros she was graduating next month, or she'd go insane with guilt. Truly, she would. Suddenly, she heard a whole lotta noise from down in the common room, and she went to see what it was. Much to her dismay, it was Sirius, James, Remus, and a death eater. How the death eater had gotten into the common room, she had no clue.
"Charli... Go!" James shouted, and she saw Sirius frown. Charli laughed, one of those evil ones, and stood behind the Death Eater.
"Looks like she was hanging with the Slytherins a little too much." Remus replied, almost sarcastically.
"Get out of the common room." she ordered the Death Eater, who she knew somehow was Flint. He gave her a small nod in response, and he turned and left. Charli sighed, and plopped herself onto the couch while watching J, S, and R give her death looks. Well, all except Sirius. The looks he were giving her were more like, god-I-love-you-so-much-yet-I'm-so-disappointed-in-you kind of thing. For all she knew, Sirius could love her; but she would never know, not that it would make a difference anyway. Because anything between them would never work, she told herself. She had to tell herself this everyday, because every time she looked at him, every time she heard his voice. It was then she realized that she did love him, that her brain couldn't hide it any longer. But she also realized that Love could mean nothing to her, the only love that could prevail was her love for revenge, and the dark arts. Love like that which she felt for Sirius, was like a Funeral of her Heart because she could never act upon it... even if she really already had. But that time it was a complete accident. She was pulled out of her personal rantings by a voice, that voice.
"It's vile what you did, really it's horrible." He said, and she blinked at him stupidly, and stared.
"What?" she asked, her voice dazed. "Didn't quite catch that." He rolled his eyes a stalked off, pretending he didn't care.
But he did. He cared about her more then anything in the world, no matter how much pretending he did. Nothing would change that, even If she was a Death Eater, on the side of Lord Voldemort.
"Moldywart really is what he should be called." James stated, and they all broke out laughing, where once again Sirius has to pretend.
Loves the Funeral of Hearts
And on Ode For Cruelty
Where angels cry b.l.o.od
On flowers of eViL in bLoOm
The Funeral of Hearts
And a plea for Mercy
When love is a gun
Separating
Me from
You
There you are everyone! And I'm awful sorry if that last part sucks... it just doesn't seem as good as the rest to me. As for the name of Charli's daughter, I've decided it'll be Valkaryie. Because in Norse Legend the Valkryie's were gathers of warrior souls, who were said to serve the great god Odin. But they originated at demon spirits who gathered human warrior spirits, and brought them to Valhalla. (Which they 'do' for Odin in the later versions also) but they tortured the souls of those not worthy to die in battle.
-ASCH