The Marauders of Hogwarts

A/N: Hi, everybody! I've been sick for three days, so I didn't really get the time to start this for a while.

Special thanks to Loki-goddess of destruction because I didn't get to thank her in the last chapter for reviewing.

Disclaimer: All recognizable characters, places, etc. belong to J.K. Rowling, the best writer EVER!!! And I mean EVER! All the characters, places, etc. that you don't recognize belong to me. Get it, got it, good.

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Chapter 5

Pranks

On the day of the Halloween feast, Remus gave James a container full of a dark green jello-like substance.

"Here's the potion, James, to turn the Slytherins into chickens."

"Thanks, Remus. You're the best."

"Stop it, I'm blushing," Remus said, fluttering his eyelashes sarcastically.

***

Sirius walked down the marble staircase and waved his wand. Holding the container with the potion in it, he darted into the shadow of a doorway as Mission Impossible music started. He hummed along.

"Dun dun da-da-da-dun dun da-da-da-dun dun."

He darted down the rest of the hallway and crept down the staircase leading to the dungeons. At the bottom, there was a hallway filled with pictures of fruit.

"Aha!" Sirius said. He strolled over and stood in front of a picture of a bowl of fruit. He waved his wand again, and the Mission Impossible music stopped.

Then, he reached out and tickled a large green pear in the center of all the fruit. The pear giggled, then suddenly turned into a large green door handle. He pulled on it, and the painting swung open.

Instantly, a group of house elves ran up, saying in high squeaky voices, "We is glad to see you, sir. Do you want some food, sir?"

"No…I came to give you this." Sirius held up the container. "Chop it up in tiny pieces and put it in the Slytherin's food for the Halloween Feast."

"What is it, sir?" one of the house elves said.

"It's…a kind of herb. It makes it taste better."

"Very well, sir. Thank you, sir." One of the house elves took the container out of his hand and ran off.

"Would you like some food, sir?" the rest said.

"Well…maybe a little."

***

Sirius left the kitchen with two cakes and a whole stack of cookies.

***

Peter and Remus were playing chess in the common room, and James was watching, when Sirius came through the portrait hole and ran over to them looking triumphant.

"I did it," he said, stuffing his face with a chocolate cake. "The Slytherins'll have feathers soon."

James grinned at the thought of Slytherins with feathers, Remus said, "Checkmate. Give me some cake," and Peter frowned.

***

Just after Sirius left the kitchen, Lily poked her head out from under the tablecloth. "Is he gone?" she said, looking around. "Damn, he took a bloody long time to get all that food. What a pig!"

"Yes, miss," the nearest house elf said.

"Good." She grinned. "And be sure to put my…spice…in the food that's going to be sent to the left side of the Gryffindor table."

"Sure thing, miss."

"Thanks. The Amazons have struck again," she muttered as she left the kitchen.

***

"So, what am I over here for, Voldemort?" Dr. Evil said lazily as one of Voldemort's Death Eaters poured him tea. "Is it about that frickin' bet?"

"Yes! I found a whole group of nemisises! I told you I would!"

"You can't be serious, Voldemort. Throw me a frickin' bone here! How could you find a whole group of them?"

"Look at this." He handed Dr. Evil the parchment. "I think seven would qualify as a group, don't you?"

"1…2…3…4…5…6…7. Yeah, ok, you've got a group. How much do I owe you?"

Voldemort smiled.

***

It was Halloween. Bats swooped among the orange-and-black-striped candles near the enchanted ceiling in the Great Hall, which was a deep velvet blue with countless stars twinkling cheerfully all over it.

"Wow," Mira breathed, forgetting that she was afraid of bats.

"Okay," Lily said importantly. "Remember: Mira, Fiona, Bella, Thea--whatever you do, don't sit on that side of the table." She pointed at the left side. "And try to make sure the Marauders--especially James--sit on that side of the table."

The rest of the Amazons nodded. "Okay." They grinned.

"Hey, James, sit here," Thea said elegantly. "It's a place of honor," she said, ushering him into a seat on the left side of the table. "For the head of our group."

James smiled. "Thanks," he said, and sat down. It was all Lily could do to keep from whooping with laughter.

Since James was sitting there, Sirius, Remus and Peter sat in the seats right next to him.

Meanwhile, the Amazons ran around telling all their particular friends not to sit on that side of the table. Their friends giggled and said, "They will?" People started covertly whispering and pointing at the Marauders. A few gasped when they heard what was being whispered, and then started laughing their heads off for no apparent reason.

The Slytherins filed into the Great Hall and sat at their table. The Marauders nudged each other and winked. Lily was nearly crying from suppressed laughter.

Everyone sat on the right side of the table, not the left side. The Marauders didn't appear to notice no one was sitting on their side of the table, and to wonder why.

"Whoopdedoo, flibbertigibbet, and blahdeblah. Let the feast begin!" Albus Dumbledore said, smiling down at them all, and everyone dug eagerly into their food.

"Hey, Jamesiekinns!" Sirius said. "Happy Halloween!" Suddenly, the Slytherins all turned into chickens. The Gryffindors, Hufflepuffs and Ravenclaws all laughed as the Slytherins ran around on their table pecking at their food.

"Bloody hell!" Professor McGonagall shrieked. "WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?!?!?"

"Look, Jamsiekinns, they love us!" Sirius said. Then, the Gryffindors all looked at him and howled in surprised laughter. He had a big, red Bozo-the-Clown-type nose. Sirius didn't have a clue, and thought they were all still laughing at the Slytherins.

"Yeah, that was our prank!" James yelled. The Gryffindors all fell over laughing. James looked over at Sirius and noticed his nose. "Oh, that's what you were laughing at!" James yelled, whooping and falling off his chair. Just when he fell over, the Gryffindors noticed he had a Bozo nose too. They laughed even harder.

"Excuse me, Mr. Potter? OUR PRANK?!?!?!? Who were your accomplices?" Professor McGonagall, who had been standing right behind him, said this in a dangerous voice of thunder. Lily howled with laughter and fell off her chair. Bella, Fiona, Thea and Mira were already down.

"Er…Black, Lupin and P-Pettigrew," James stammered from the floor, pointing at his friends.

"James! Why did you turn us in?" Sirius said indignantly. James shrugged weakly.

Professor McGonagall said suddenly, "Potter, why do you all have…big red noses?"

The Gryffindors, who were all on the floor laughing weakly, looked over at the Marauders, who were also on the floor laughing weakly, and laughed harder. Remus and Peter had Bozo noses too.

"What?" James said. He felt his nose, and poked it, feeling the soft red Bozo-ness of it. He looked at it cross-eyed. "AAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!" he screamed.

"We did that prank," Lily whispered, earning the Amazons high-fives from half of Gryffindor House.

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A/N: Okay, this chapter was probably kinda short, but I'll try to improve on that in the next chapter! Hope everybody liked it!

And I'm starting X-mas holidays today!!!! YAY!!!!!!!! ^_^

I wish I got a boyfriend for X-mas that'd be fun…lol I won't bore you with my personal life.

Please review! :D

~Hermione2