() the change of POV
Special
By Misaki Sakura
Chapter 5 : Truth
The first sight that catches my eyes is Ran walking into the dojo when I am taking out my ball from my bag. Shit! I come here to avoid him ... well that wasn't a good idea since we're working at the same school, but I thought this is too early for him to come. Maybe he has the same thinking with me.
"It's him."
"Yeah, I know." I try to hide my feeling as I continue my preparation. Youji stands there, watching me.
"What are you gonna do?"
"About?"
"Him. Are you going to keep avoiding him or confronting him?"
The ball's dropped from my hand. I look at him, shocked. "Confront him?! No!"
"Why?"
"Cause ... cause ... I don't want to see him. Not now."
Sighing, he picks the ball I dropped before. "This is not going to finish if you don't speak with him. Sooner the better."
"It's easy for you to say!" I snap at him.
"I don't want you to regret this later, Ken."
"What do you mean by that?"
"Nothing."
"Fine."
I kick my ball. As I dribble it to the goal, I glance at the dojo's window. The sight startled me. Ran's practicing with his katana. Not that I haven't seen him do that before but this time it feels ... weird. The way he moves his katana, swinging it around gracefully ... I blush.
"Why do I have to blush?" I say incoherently.
Youji's grinning at me. I know he has followed my gaze and known who has made me blush. I intend to yell at him but it will attract Ran's attention ... or whoever near us so I grit my teeth and keep my mouth shut. I'll deal with him later.
I don't know how many hours I've been practicing until I notice that Youji's nowhere to be seen. It's not that strange actually but somehow I get this uneasy feeling and decide to look for him.
"Where's that stupid Youji?! He's not hitting with the teachers, right?!"
I catch a glimpse of red hair from the dojo's window. He's still the ... oh my God! What is Youji's doing there?! Ran's face is getting redder and from the look of his eyes, he can kill Youji anytime soon.
I dash there as fast as I can. Even now, I don't know which one that makes me run there. The thought of Youji being killed, or at least hit, or the thought of seeing Ran.
I still can't figure out the answer when I finally reach Youji. "Youji, what are you ..." I hiss.
"Shush!"
I hear a loud sound as he throws his wooden katana down. I close my eyes tightly at that. But I'm not prepared for what I'm gonna hear next. "Because what he always thinks about is Aya!! Because he never thinks about me!! Because I love him!!"
I gasp. It doesn't cross my mind that Ran will know my presence right now. All that's in my head is his words. Love me? He loves me? How could he love me?! I'm just a clumsy pathetic ex-soccer player that unfortunately has fallen for his sister. What's in me that makes him think about me like that?
"Ken ..."
I am too stunned to react until Youji pinches my arm, which makes me scream. "What did you do that for?!"
He doesn't answer me. Instead, he leaves, saying, "I'll leave this to you, Ken."
Being left alone with Ran in here makes me feel really uncomfortable. How could I after what happened last night?! ... Or maybe this morning? Now what am I supposed to do? Run?
I know that my fear must've shown in my eyes 'cause he looks at me with guilt and ... loss?
"You don't have to be afraid of me like that, Ken."
I step back as he steps closer to me. I bet he notices that and stops any further advance. Still, he looks at me. I can't talk to him, not now. I don't want to. Why did Youji force me to do this? Why?! I can't even look at him! How am I supposed to confront him?! Youji and his stupid idea!
"Ken, ... I'm sorry."
"..."
"I don't expect you to forgive me easily. I know. Still, I need to say that. And I mean everything I said to Youji. I am really in ..."
"Stop!! Okay, I've heard enough of this!"
I run as fast as I can. I don't want him to say that. I don't want to hear him saying those words. It feels so ... wrong. I love Aya and he knows that. Falling in love ... he has this feeling for me ... that's wrong! Absolutely wrong!
Then I realize no matter how many times I chant them in my mind, I don't feel that it's wrong. What's happening to me?!
Even though how much I want to run after him, I just stand there watching him running away from me. I don't think he liked me before but now I know he hates me. I pick my wooden katana and put it in my bag.
"Nii-chan, you like him."
"I mean you like Ken-kun. No, love him to be exact."
Yes, Aya. You're right. I love him with all my heart. But I made a great mistake and he'll never forgive me. Never.
It's been a month since that accident and I still can't look at him in the eyes. Not that I met him though. Come to think of it, I never saw him after that confrontation in the dojo ... the one I ran away from. Yeah, that one.
I sit on the bench under the tree ... the one I saw Ran was sitting on not too long ago. Okay, I don't know what's happening to me but ... there's something strange. How can he affect me this much?
"Ken-kun ..."
"Wha ... Aya ..."
She sits beside me, eyes full with concern. "What happened? You look down."
"It's ... nothing ... really ..."
Of course I can't tell her the cause of my lack of spirit is her brother. She's still looking at me. I know she doesn't believe me.
"You can always talk to me, Ken-kun."
"Thank's but it's really nothing."
"Ken-kun, you sound like my nii-chan. He never let me know if he has a problem. He always thinks I'm still a little girl."
I flinch when she mentions his name. Her nii-chan ...
"But I know that he's right. I'm a girl after all ... and our parents had told him to look after me. Sometimes he's too serious for his own good."
"Aaa ..."
"Ne, Ken-kun ... I really don't want to trouble you but can you give me a lift today?"
"... Ran?"
"He catches a cold and is bedridden ... by me."
I chuckle lightly. I don't want to refuse her but ... . Forget it. It won't hurt to accompany her home, will it? Anyway I can't let Aya takes a bus ride home. Ran will be worried sick. ... Wait! Why am I thinking about Ran? Am I ... worried about him?
"Ken-kun ..."
"Okay. Come on, Aya."
I glance at the alarm clock on my side table. It's six o'clock already and Aya hasn't come home. Where's she? Does something happen? I have to pick her up.
I am trying to get up when suddenly I feel another's presence in my room. Instinctively, I reach out for my katana when I hear his voice.
"I'm sorry ... Ran. But Aya told me to ... check on you. Sorry if I wake you up."
I can't say anything and I don't trust my mouth to speak so I keep my mouth shut. Ken. Ken is in my room. That Aya ... I lie down once more and feel a lot better than before.
He shifts uncomfortably in his seat. Silence. An uncomfortable silence occurs between us, like always. Neither of us even bothers to open our mouth. I decide I have to be the one who make the first move. Not that starting a conversation is ever easy for me.
But before I can say anything, he stands and grabs the mug on my side table. "I'll ... get you ... another glass of water. ... Excuse me."
I can do nothing but nod.
We arrive a little bit late since she had to wait for me putting all the balls in the storage. Plus the traffic ...
"Thank you, Ken-kun. Why don't you join us for dinner?"
"No, thank's. I have to go home or else Youji will be mad at me."
That's a lie actually. It's true that he's worried about me especially after that accident but it doesn't make him waiting for me to come home. I told him not to. I don't want to be treated like an infant.
"Please, Ken-kun."
Like I've said before, I can't refuse Aya. ... Or is it because I desperately want to see Ran? Desperately? Where did that word come from?!
"Okay, Aya."
"Great! Oh, can you check on my nii-chan? I'll go preparing the dinner. His room is the second from the stairs." She says as she takes off her shoes and
I can't say anything. If I refuse, she'll figure out that there's something wrong, so I make my move to the stairs. The second room from the stairs ... this must be it.
I open the door and enter slowly, carefully not to wake him up. He's sleeping. His flaming hair's strewn about his face. He looks like an angel as the moon illuminates his face. Angel ...
I sit on the chair beside his bed. Watching him carefully, I notice that he doesn't look like Aya that much. Blood-coloured hair matching the amethyst eyes ...
He gets up suddenly, hand reaching out for something only to grasp the air. His katana ... Maybe he knows that I'm here.
"I'm sorry ... Ran. But Aya told me to ... check on you. Sorry if I wake you up."
He doesn't say anything and leans back against the pillow. I don't know what to say either. It's not like I haven't overcome my fear for him. ... Okay, I'm still a bit afraid of him but this is beside that point! I'm having this strange feeling whenever he's around. Not to mention this also makes me blush really hard, especially when we're alone like this.
Finally, this silence becomes too overwhelming. I have to do something! I grab the mug on the table. "I'll ... get you ... another glass of water. ... Excuse me."
I run out, nearly bumping the door in the process. On my way going downstairs, I hear some voices. I recognize them as Aya's and ... Suzuki's. Suzuki? What is he doing here?
I can help my curiosity and peek inside the kitchen. There I see Aya ... is hugging Suzuki ... in a very intimate way. I gasp and the mug slips from my hand, meeting with the floor. It breaks instantly. They turn their head towards me and gasp as well.
"Ken-kun ..."
TBC
A/N : A little bit longer than usual. Oh well, I can't help it.
So it's getting clearer (or more complicated? --). I want to say
thank you to all the reviewers. Keep reviewing, onegai? pleading eye
. I can't say much here. Don't know what to say actually. Anyway,
thank you very much!! R & R please.
Special
By Misaki Sakura
Chapter 5 : Truth
The first sight that catches my eyes is Ran walking into the dojo when I am taking out my ball from my bag. Shit! I come here to avoid him ... well that wasn't a good idea since we're working at the same school, but I thought this is too early for him to come. Maybe he has the same thinking with me.
"It's him."
"Yeah, I know." I try to hide my feeling as I continue my preparation. Youji stands there, watching me.
"What are you gonna do?"
"About?"
"Him. Are you going to keep avoiding him or confronting him?"
The ball's dropped from my hand. I look at him, shocked. "Confront him?! No!"
"Why?"
"Cause ... cause ... I don't want to see him. Not now."
Sighing, he picks the ball I dropped before. "This is not going to finish if you don't speak with him. Sooner the better."
"It's easy for you to say!" I snap at him.
"I don't want you to regret this later, Ken."
"What do you mean by that?"
"Nothing."
"Fine."
I kick my ball. As I dribble it to the goal, I glance at the dojo's window. The sight startled me. Ran's practicing with his katana. Not that I haven't seen him do that before but this time it feels ... weird. The way he moves his katana, swinging it around gracefully ... I blush.
"Why do I have to blush?" I say incoherently.
Youji's grinning at me. I know he has followed my gaze and known who has made me blush. I intend to yell at him but it will attract Ran's attention ... or whoever near us so I grit my teeth and keep my mouth shut. I'll deal with him later.
I don't know how many hours I've been practicing until I notice that Youji's nowhere to be seen. It's not that strange actually but somehow I get this uneasy feeling and decide to look for him.
"Where's that stupid Youji?! He's not hitting with the teachers, right?!"
I catch a glimpse of red hair from the dojo's window. He's still the ... oh my God! What is Youji's doing there?! Ran's face is getting redder and from the look of his eyes, he can kill Youji anytime soon.
I dash there as fast as I can. Even now, I don't know which one that makes me run there. The thought of Youji being killed, or at least hit, or the thought of seeing Ran.
I still can't figure out the answer when I finally reach Youji. "Youji, what are you ..." I hiss.
"Shush!"
I hear a loud sound as he throws his wooden katana down. I close my eyes tightly at that. But I'm not prepared for what I'm gonna hear next. "Because what he always thinks about is Aya!! Because he never thinks about me!! Because I love him!!"
I gasp. It doesn't cross my mind that Ran will know my presence right now. All that's in my head is his words. Love me? He loves me? How could he love me?! I'm just a clumsy pathetic ex-soccer player that unfortunately has fallen for his sister. What's in me that makes him think about me like that?
"Ken ..."
I am too stunned to react until Youji pinches my arm, which makes me scream. "What did you do that for?!"
He doesn't answer me. Instead, he leaves, saying, "I'll leave this to you, Ken."
Being left alone with Ran in here makes me feel really uncomfortable. How could I after what happened last night?! ... Or maybe this morning? Now what am I supposed to do? Run?
I know that my fear must've shown in my eyes 'cause he looks at me with guilt and ... loss?
"You don't have to be afraid of me like that, Ken."
I step back as he steps closer to me. I bet he notices that and stops any further advance. Still, he looks at me. I can't talk to him, not now. I don't want to. Why did Youji force me to do this? Why?! I can't even look at him! How am I supposed to confront him?! Youji and his stupid idea!
"Ken, ... I'm sorry."
"..."
"I don't expect you to forgive me easily. I know. Still, I need to say that. And I mean everything I said to Youji. I am really in ..."
"Stop!! Okay, I've heard enough of this!"
I run as fast as I can. I don't want him to say that. I don't want to hear him saying those words. It feels so ... wrong. I love Aya and he knows that. Falling in love ... he has this feeling for me ... that's wrong! Absolutely wrong!
Then I realize no matter how many times I chant them in my mind, I don't feel that it's wrong. What's happening to me?!
Even though how much I want to run after him, I just stand there watching him running away from me. I don't think he liked me before but now I know he hates me. I pick my wooden katana and put it in my bag.
"Nii-chan, you like him."
"I mean you like Ken-kun. No, love him to be exact."
Yes, Aya. You're right. I love him with all my heart. But I made a great mistake and he'll never forgive me. Never.
It's been a month since that accident and I still can't look at him in the eyes. Not that I met him though. Come to think of it, I never saw him after that confrontation in the dojo ... the one I ran away from. Yeah, that one.
I sit on the bench under the tree ... the one I saw Ran was sitting on not too long ago. Okay, I don't know what's happening to me but ... there's something strange. How can he affect me this much?
"Ken-kun ..."
"Wha ... Aya ..."
She sits beside me, eyes full with concern. "What happened? You look down."
"It's ... nothing ... really ..."
Of course I can't tell her the cause of my lack of spirit is her brother. She's still looking at me. I know she doesn't believe me.
"You can always talk to me, Ken-kun."
"Thank's but it's really nothing."
"Ken-kun, you sound like my nii-chan. He never let me know if he has a problem. He always thinks I'm still a little girl."
I flinch when she mentions his name. Her nii-chan ...
"But I know that he's right. I'm a girl after all ... and our parents had told him to look after me. Sometimes he's too serious for his own good."
"Aaa ..."
"Ne, Ken-kun ... I really don't want to trouble you but can you give me a lift today?"
"... Ran?"
"He catches a cold and is bedridden ... by me."
I chuckle lightly. I don't want to refuse her but ... . Forget it. It won't hurt to accompany her home, will it? Anyway I can't let Aya takes a bus ride home. Ran will be worried sick. ... Wait! Why am I thinking about Ran? Am I ... worried about him?
"Ken-kun ..."
"Okay. Come on, Aya."
I glance at the alarm clock on my side table. It's six o'clock already and Aya hasn't come home. Where's she? Does something happen? I have to pick her up.
I am trying to get up when suddenly I feel another's presence in my room. Instinctively, I reach out for my katana when I hear his voice.
"I'm sorry ... Ran. But Aya told me to ... check on you. Sorry if I wake you up."
I can't say anything and I don't trust my mouth to speak so I keep my mouth shut. Ken. Ken is in my room. That Aya ... I lie down once more and feel a lot better than before.
He shifts uncomfortably in his seat. Silence. An uncomfortable silence occurs between us, like always. Neither of us even bothers to open our mouth. I decide I have to be the one who make the first move. Not that starting a conversation is ever easy for me.
But before I can say anything, he stands and grabs the mug on my side table. "I'll ... get you ... another glass of water. ... Excuse me."
I can do nothing but nod.
We arrive a little bit late since she had to wait for me putting all the balls in the storage. Plus the traffic ...
"Thank you, Ken-kun. Why don't you join us for dinner?"
"No, thank's. I have to go home or else Youji will be mad at me."
That's a lie actually. It's true that he's worried about me especially after that accident but it doesn't make him waiting for me to come home. I told him not to. I don't want to be treated like an infant.
"Please, Ken-kun."
Like I've said before, I can't refuse Aya. ... Or is it because I desperately want to see Ran? Desperately? Where did that word come from?!
"Okay, Aya."
"Great! Oh, can you check on my nii-chan? I'll go preparing the dinner. His room is the second from the stairs." She says as she takes off her shoes and
I can't say anything. If I refuse, she'll figure out that there's something wrong, so I make my move to the stairs. The second room from the stairs ... this must be it.
I open the door and enter slowly, carefully not to wake him up. He's sleeping. His flaming hair's strewn about his face. He looks like an angel as the moon illuminates his face. Angel ...
I sit on the chair beside his bed. Watching him carefully, I notice that he doesn't look like Aya that much. Blood-coloured hair matching the amethyst eyes ...
He gets up suddenly, hand reaching out for something only to grasp the air. His katana ... Maybe he knows that I'm here.
"I'm sorry ... Ran. But Aya told me to ... check on you. Sorry if I wake you up."
He doesn't say anything and leans back against the pillow. I don't know what to say either. It's not like I haven't overcome my fear for him. ... Okay, I'm still a bit afraid of him but this is beside that point! I'm having this strange feeling whenever he's around. Not to mention this also makes me blush really hard, especially when we're alone like this.
Finally, this silence becomes too overwhelming. I have to do something! I grab the mug on the table. "I'll ... get you ... another glass of water. ... Excuse me."
I run out, nearly bumping the door in the process. On my way going downstairs, I hear some voices. I recognize them as Aya's and ... Suzuki's. Suzuki? What is he doing here?
I can help my curiosity and peek inside the kitchen. There I see Aya ... is hugging Suzuki ... in a very intimate way. I gasp and the mug slips from my hand, meeting with the floor. It breaks instantly. They turn their head towards me and gasp as well.
"Ken-kun ..."
TBC
A/N : A little bit longer than usual. Oh well, I can't help it.
So it's getting clearer (or more complicated? --). I want to say
thank you to all the reviewers. Keep reviewing, onegai? pleading eye
. I can't say much here. Don't know what to say actually. Anyway,
thank you very much!! R & R please.