DarkGhost42: I don't own YYH or any of the characters...and...this is the only name I could come up with for the chapter (nervous grin)

Chapter IV:

Changing the Past

"K-Kurama..." I whispered as I ran my finger across his ghost-white face. My eyes were glued to his lifeless body and I couldn't find the energy to blink nor take my eyes off of him. My heart ached at what I had done. My anger had driven me mad, and this was the price I had to pay for letting my emotions get the better of me. I cursed myself inwardly for doing it.

I had always said that emotions would cause everyone's downfall. All we needed was anger and hate, and then the entire population could live. It's ironic how love is supposed to make you feel happy, yet it kills like a blood thirsty vampire on a full moon.

I suddenly picked up the sound of footsteps coming down the hall. I couldn't be seen...not after what I had done to the person I loved most. So I fled and watched from a distance to see the shocked and disgusted expression on the poor soul who witnessed his unconscious body lying sloppily on the wooden floor.

The door slid all the way open and Botan, Keiko, and Master Genkai all entered to find Kurama on the floor lying peacefully in an uncomfortable position. Keiko gasped and nearly fainted while Botan's eye filled with tears. Genkai's face stayed stern and she moved towards him.

"W-Who could have done this Master Genkai?" Botan stammered. Genkai shot a glance my way and a chill shot up my spine. I froze on the spot. Was she about to expose me for the murderer I was?

"It was someone with a lost and angered soul. Their emotions must have mixed and caused them to be driven insane. This usually happens to people who have certain emotions that have been locked away for quite sometime. But...I cannot tell who did this. All I know is..." her gaze fell to the floor and her eyes glistened over with a barrier so that I couldn't tell what she was thinking.

"What is it Genkai?" Keiko asked anxiously. Genkai looked at them and sighed.

"Kurama...he is still alive. What ever hurt him didn't get right to the stomach, so he'll live. We just need to get him to emergency care ASAP. Botan, go to Yukina and ask for her assistance," Genkai ordered.

He was still alive. After I had damaged him so dreadfully, he was still alive. Now I was starting to wish I had killed him for good. He would haunt me now. He would never forgive me for what I had done. There was no way he would return my feelings now. What mess had I thrown myself head over heels into?

Botan nodded at Genkai's orders and flew away on her oar. Genkai then explained to Keiko the herbs that would be needed to cure him and sent her away. She then turned her attention to me.

"Hiei...I know you're there. Come down here." I didn't feel like quarreling, so I obeyed her demands. I landed swiftly in the doorway and lowered my head. I couldn't bear to look anyone in the eye, especially not her. She knew the truth. "Hiei, look at me. I can't lecture you with you acting like a mope!" My eyes shot up and she glared at me, but it wasn't a glare of anger or shame...it was a glare of understanding and sympathy.

"I understand why you did this, Hiei. I once had mixed emotions like you, and like yours, mine were hard to control as well." She looked to Kurama and my gaze followed hers. "Love can be the most powerful of weapons if not handled delicately. You aren't use to it, so this is the effect it had on you. You reacted too soon and it only led you to more pain and panic. You're afraid of rejection are you not?" She then shot her gaze back up to me. My eyes widened and my heart skipped a beat.

"I-I am...or...I was...now I just don't know anymore." She moved towards me and held my chin up with her index finger and thumb. She stared at me for a minute. She had reached into the pits of my soul and sucked out all I felt and thought. She then took her right hand and slapped me cold across the face. I stumbled backwards and glared at her.

"What the hell do you think you're doing!?" I hollered. She snarled and bit back an insult.

"Hmph...it was to knock some sense into that thick skull of yours! After all you've been through, you wouldn't be able to tell whether he loved you or not! Isn't it obvious, Hiei? When you're fighting...he's the only one speaking your name constantly. He can feel your pain, and the more you're hurt, the louder he speaks it. It's as if he's been trying to send you a message. And when you're alone, he looks at you, but not like he looks at the others. He shows you his compassion and all the love he can muster. He loves you too, and this is how you repay him!!? You deliberately try to murder the one you love!" Her words sliced through me like an old rusted knife. I flinched and collapsed to my knees in front of her.

"Don't you see? You need to straighten it all out now, Hiei. You need to show him that love. Once you've given it all up to him, you can release that breath you've been holding for so long. You can relax your stressed mind and you can finally smile with confidence and trust knowing you'll be together like that forever. Of course he'll feel confused at your new found words and feelings...but it's only natural for you to act in such a manner. He'll understand as I did. Don't be afraid anymore." I couldn't move. Her words rang in my head. 'Don't be afraid...' I was afraid. He would surely push me farther away after I had tried my hardest to rid myself of him. But...he was Kurama. I was his best friend...and he loved me. He would love me no matter what the cost. I had to do something. I had to talk to him again.

"Thank you...Master Genkai..." I mumbled quietly while continuing to stare at the ground.

"Yukina should arrive soon. You may visit Kurama when he's healed. But for the time being, leave and go clear your thoughts. I'm pretty sure I've gone over the edge with being a Drama Queen, but I'll just say this last thing. You need to follow what your heart tells you, not your mind. Your heart will keep your feelings safe, it's what keeps you alive Hiei. Don't let it break by your silence." I nodded and flitted from the temple without a second glance back. I would finally set it straight.

X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X

I watched as Yukina left Kurama's room and walked out with a pot of remedy she had stirred up for him as a healer. She looked up as she saw me leaning against a wall against the temple entrance. She smiled at me sweetly and bowed.

"Good afternoon, Hiei-sama. Kurama is feeling much better now. He does have a bit of a problem with his large intestine, but it's nothing to really worry about. It's just a little scratch. Oh, and by the way, he wanted to talk to you. You can visit him now if you wish. Well...I must take my leave. It was nice seeing you again! Goodbye!" she chirped before leaving my site. I smiled at her as she left. There was no point in me scowling at her because of matters that were none of her concern. But...Kurama wanted to see me. What for? What would he say to me? Was it because he was going to reject me?

I sighed and decided I wouldn't know until I saw him, so I took a deep breath and prepared for the worst. I flitted to his room and stood silently in the doorway waiting for him to notice me. He did without even looking up from a pad in front of him. He stared at me, but did not smile.

"Come here, Hiei." His tone sounded so flat and dead. It's like he had become a ghost now and it was all my doing. I took a step forward and he made a gesture for me to advance even more. I walked until I was in front of his bed and he motioned for me to sit, so I obeyed.

"I wanted to show you something I had been working on for awhile. Many people don't know this, but I've taken up an interest in art, and I decided to make my first piece something truly special. Do you know what it is?" he asked me. I couldn't find the strength to use words, so I simply shook my head 'no'.

He handed me the pad in front of him and I stared at him for a second before averting my gaze. My eyes opened wide with amazement. He had drawn me, and he'd already shaded it too. It was amazing...but the look I had. It seemed so distant and disturbed. What did it mean?

"I see you don't understand, Hiei. It makes sense to me. You usually weren't one for art." He chuckled lightly and then continued. "It shows how you always seem. You're lost in your own mind Hiei. You seem like a helpless child sometimes. Being so naïve can cause pain, and that's why you did that to me. I understand, and I forgive you for it. I could never stay mad at you." He looked up and smiled. It was a warm whole-hearted smile full of trust and understanding. I smiled back. He didn't hate me for what I did, and that meant he still cared, but...I had revealed my deepest secret to him. How did he feel about that?

I stared down at his drawing of me and brushed my hand across my eyes. I could see the hurt and fear in them through his work. He knew me too well.

"Hiei..." he whispered. My head shot up and I looked at him. His expression had changed to doubt. His skeptical eyes scanned me for some trace of truth. But what he wanted, I had no idea.

"Y-yes?" I gulped. What did he intend to do now?

"You told me you loved me. Is that true? Or was it just a trick of you mind? How do you really feel?" he asked me curiously. I wanted to tear myself away from his gaze, but my eyes wouldn't move.

"I-I do...Kurama. I really do love you. But, I was confused...and so I ran from it all. I didn't want to be rejected, and I thought that I would never have you. All this time, I thought you would find someone else and forget about me. I thought I would become nothing more than a shadow to you. I was..." The words rang in my head once again. 'Don't be afraid, Hiei...don't be afraid'

"I was afraid..."I sulked and turned away from him in shame. I had never feared anything before. But that...was another lie. I had been afraid of everything, so I tried to tell myself and make myself believe I was above fear and emotion. I had lied to myself the entire time about being powerful, about being of higher class than others around me, about not loving the one person who cared for me the most. Kurama...I lied to you and to myself. How could you ever forgive me?

"There's no reason for you to be afraid, Hiei. I love you too, and it's not a lie. You don't know how long I'd been waiting for you to say that. I'll never leave you." My eyes opened wide and suddenly, time froze. Those words...he had said them. And they were meant for me. They were only for me.

I turned my body to face him. I gazed deep into his emerald pools. He had spoken the truth. He loved me just the same. My senses became clear and I realized rejection would never fall upon me. Kurama would hold me and never let me fall. He was there for me and would protect me from everything.

He took my face in his hands and looked at me with love and compassion. He leaned down and whispered in my ear.

"Now prove to me that you love me just the same. Kiss me, Hiei." He then pulled back and I beamed at him before capturing his lips with my own. We sat like that. It was like a perfect painting. It was all a dream now...with just the two of us.

A/N: Are you guys happy now? I'm soooo sorry this took forever to update, but I'm in school again and stuff and I've had projects and things like that. And you know I have the attention span of a bug, so one thing can't really keep me occupied for too long.

Hiei: - - That's true...you can't watch the same T.V. show for more than two minutes.

Ghost: Nuh-uh...I watch YYH until the very end!! And that's probably one of the only shows where I won't get up during a commercial. (grin)

Hiei: - - You really don't have a life do you?

Ghost: What would you expect? I'll probably grow up to be a hobo underneath Kroger's warehouse.

Hiei: Where'd that come from?

Ghost: (shrugs) Dunno....but anyways, REVIEW PEOPLES!!!! REVIEW!!!! And again...sorry for the wait. DON'T HURT ME! (hides)