The Lost Love
Chapter 1
By Misaki Sakura
/Ken's POV/
Am I hearing things? Is this what it feels? Does it have to be this painful? Being dumped...
I buried my face in my arms again, sobbing. I recall my earlier confrontation with him. It's not too hard for me to do it but ...
Flashback
He approached me when I was moving the pots in the storeroom. Before I could greet him, he had said it.
"Ken...we're over."
"What?!"
"I said we're over." He said, started to walk away.
"But ... why?!"
He turned around and said the last thing I wanted him to say. The most painful part..."'Cause I have no interest in you whatsoever."
End of Flashback
It was like slapping me right on the face. It took me a while before his words finally sank in. I try my best not to cry, but instead of being calmed, I burst out in tears ... again. I'm no stranger to betrayal. The image of Kase's formed in my mind. The image that I've tried and tried to forget. I thought ... I thought he's different. I had summed up all my courage back then to tell him my feelings. He only nodded. He said nothing in particular ... just nodded. I didn't know if he had ever loved me but I didn't expect him to be like that too. Must I feel this again? This agony ... How could you do this to me?! How could you, Ran?!!!
/Aya's POV/
I can hear him crying from my room. Since his room is next to mine and the wall isn't that thick, I can hear it clearly. My heart aches. Maybe that's not right. Maybe it's only a lie. No interest in him ... No one can do that. He's like summer days. Shimmering daylights. Smiles that can't be removed from his soft lips. Cheery ... , full of kindness ... which he have offered me so many times and I've turned down. But I have to do it. I have to let him go. I don't deserve him. I don't and this is ... this is all for Ken. For his own sakes... or is it for me?
I'm afraid of him. Afraid of the love he has given me. I know that one day he'll regret it. Why would he want me if he could have someone far better than me? Maybe this is just me way to avoid it. Reject him before being rejected. Dump him before being dumped. I smile bitterly.
/Ken's POV/
"Ken, open up. Dinner is ready."
I don't do anything. Instead of opening the door for Youji, I just stare at it blankly. After a while, I hear the door knob is turned and Youji walks in with a tray in his hands.
"Here, eat these. You haven't eaten anything since noon."
He places the tray in front of me. I see a bowl of rice and a plate of beef yakiniku on it. Omi's specialty. I smile. They're trying to comfort me. I know. They're the best friend I've ever had.
"Thank's a lot, Yotan."
"Hey, Kenken. What's wrong with you? You haven't gone out of this room for almost eight hours! What happened?"
"... Nothing. It's nothing."
"... Are you sure? 'Cause your face is wet. And I bet they're tears, am I right?"
"Nothing can fool you, huh? Well, ... if you want to listen ..."
"I am ready for you 24/7. Now spill it."
" ... We're over, Youji. Me and Ran ... we're over."
"Why?!"
"He ... he dumped me. I know he never loves me. He never does." I'm choking back sobs.
Youji doesn't say anything. He pats me on the back and leaves me. Not a single word comes out from his mouth. I wipe my tears and stare at the tray. I have no appetite right now, but if I don't eat them, Omi will be disappointed. I sigh.
/Aya's POV/
I open my eyes when I feel another's presence in my room. Youji's standing near the edge of my bed, glaring at me. He pulls my blanket roughly. I'm tired beyond word so I do nothing.
"Why did you do that?!"
"What?" I said lazily. I'm not in the mood to talk to anyone now, especially Youji.
"Why did you do what you did to Ken?!"
"What makes you think I would tell you?"
"I think I've told you not to make him cry!! I've told you that, haven't I?!"
"Hn."
He's still glaring at me. I think his eyes are going to pop out if he continues.
"You know what, Aya? You're such a jerk. Now let me tell you, Mr stick-shove-up-to-the-ass Fujimiya, I'm going to make him mine. You can stay here and eat the sheets."
He stalks out of my room, leaving me to think. Yes, Youji is one of the main reasons why I leave Ken. Like I've said before, he deserves someone better and that someone is Youji. He has actually said that to me the first time he knew about us. He's in love with Ken, I can tell. I sigh. Maybe Youji can make him happier than me.
/Ken's POV/
"Ken-kun, can I come in?"
"Sure."
Omi smiles at me as he walks in. He sits beside me. I smile back at him as best as I can.
"What happened to you, Ken-kun? It's not like you to be this sad."
I tell him the truth. The painful truth about me and Ran. He stares at me with a pitiful look and ... a little fear? He hugs me to comfort me, to cheer me up.
"Calm down, Ken-kun. You're gonna be okay. Trust me. You're gonna be okay."
"I know, Omi. It's just ... I gave him all ... all he wanted and this is how I get repaid?! Can't he love me back? Does he have to use me like that? Does he have to betray me?!"
My tears are threatening to burst out again. I wipe them roughly. Omi doesn't say anything. Maybe he too doesn't know what to say. I smile at him hardly.
"I understand, Omi. I'm gonna be okay"
TBC
A/N : This is actually my very first fanfiction that I wrote in the computer but I decided not to upload this first. Well, after I edited some words (and probably the plot), here it is.