Chapter 11
After about another five hundred bazillion miles of walking through wilderness , we stopped to make camp for the night. As long as I'd been around these guys.. I needed some "Emily time". Much to the protest of the males, I decided to walk around the surrounding forest a bit. After about five minutes of walking through nothing but thick brush, I came across a beautiful stream. It was so clear, you could see the rocks at the bottom. If you had walked as far as I had, in that heat, you'd understand how I smelled, so I figured 'what the hey' and started to take off my shirt. I didn't get the damn thing over my head before I heard a sound behind me.
"Damn pervy hobbits..." I said to myself pulling my shirt back down and turning around. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a large, flowering bush begin to shake. "Oh crap..." Looking around, I finally picked up the biggest stick I could find and walked over to the bush. Brave time Em... As soon as I was about to whack the living sheet out of that shrub, a tiny little squirrel scurried out. Laughing at my fear, I threw my stick down. But before I could even turn around, I was tackled to the ground.
"What the he..." I started to say as I turned over, but stopped dead when I saw what had knocked me over like a sack of cheese.
"Where's the ring?" A extremely ugly, smelly, and all around yucky orc asked as he leaned over my body. Oooooh shit...
"What ring?" I asked this disgusting piece of flesh. He was wearing what looked like a once white shirt, that was now a disturbing brown color. Hey I've seen that color before! That's the color of dried blood. Crap crap crapola on a stick..
"You know what ring!" He sneered through his sharp, pointy, yellowed teeth. Guess Crest isn't too popular around these parts...
"Uhm.. This is the only ring I have...." I said taking off the bright green glow in the dark ring I had gotten from a gum ball machine and holding it up.
"Do you mock me?" He said getting all up in my face. Guess they haven't heard of Tic Tacs either.. Then the vomit-worthy orc got a strange look on his face and fell on top of me. Dead.
"Eww! Dead orc! Dead orc! Icky ew.. Get it off me!" I said trying to get up but failing miserably. I noticed Legolas behind the moving squirrel bush with a bow in his hands. "A little help here you think?!?"
"Are you okay Miss Emily?" He said pulling the dead blob off an orc off of me and helping me to my feet.
"Yeah besides the permenant stench of dead orc, I'm peachy keen jelly bean." I said as I brushed off. Yeah like that's gonna help the horrifying stench of death. "Hey I have a question... Do you know why he was asking me about a ring?"
After about another five hundred bazillion miles of walking through wilderness , we stopped to make camp for the night. As long as I'd been around these guys.. I needed some "Emily time". Much to the protest of the males, I decided to walk around the surrounding forest a bit. After about five minutes of walking through nothing but thick brush, I came across a beautiful stream. It was so clear, you could see the rocks at the bottom. If you had walked as far as I had, in that heat, you'd understand how I smelled, so I figured 'what the hey' and started to take off my shirt. I didn't get the damn thing over my head before I heard a sound behind me.
"Damn pervy hobbits..." I said to myself pulling my shirt back down and turning around. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a large, flowering bush begin to shake. "Oh crap..." Looking around, I finally picked up the biggest stick I could find and walked over to the bush. Brave time Em... As soon as I was about to whack the living sheet out of that shrub, a tiny little squirrel scurried out. Laughing at my fear, I threw my stick down. But before I could even turn around, I was tackled to the ground.
"What the he..." I started to say as I turned over, but stopped dead when I saw what had knocked me over like a sack of cheese.
"Where's the ring?" A extremely ugly, smelly, and all around yucky orc asked as he leaned over my body. Oooooh shit...
"What ring?" I asked this disgusting piece of flesh. He was wearing what looked like a once white shirt, that was now a disturbing brown color. Hey I've seen that color before! That's the color of dried blood. Crap crap crapola on a stick..
"You know what ring!" He sneered through his sharp, pointy, yellowed teeth. Guess Crest isn't too popular around these parts...
"Uhm.. This is the only ring I have...." I said taking off the bright green glow in the dark ring I had gotten from a gum ball machine and holding it up.
"Do you mock me?" He said getting all up in my face. Guess they haven't heard of Tic Tacs either.. Then the vomit-worthy orc got a strange look on his face and fell on top of me. Dead.
"Eww! Dead orc! Dead orc! Icky ew.. Get it off me!" I said trying to get up but failing miserably. I noticed Legolas behind the moving squirrel bush with a bow in his hands. "A little help here you think?!?"
"Are you okay Miss Emily?" He said pulling the dead blob off an orc off of me and helping me to my feet.
"Yeah besides the permenant stench of dead orc, I'm peachy keen jelly bean." I said as I brushed off. Yeah like that's gonna help the horrifying stench of death. "Hey I have a question... Do you know why he was asking me about a ring?"