Disclaimer: Sadly (and we really, really do mean that we're very, very sorry about this) neither Queenie, nor I, am profiting from these little exploits of ours. Other than the wonderful and useful reviews you lot give of course… Which by the way we dream about at night… Least ways I do… ^_^
A/N : Omg, another chapter! Like, whoa, dude! Oh, just so you know, being how this is a joint fic and all, where Queenie posted the first chapter, so I'll post this (okay… duh…) then we'll take it in turns. Now what's the bet that Queenie already said that in the first chapter's notes and I've forgotten? Feel free to make bids, I'll keep a record of it… ^_^
Ok – well, seeing how there seems to be a lot of room up top here, me thinks I'll do the reviewer replies here! Oh – if there are questioned about the bits that Queenie wrote from the first chapter, then I'll leave them for her to answer, because I obviously don't know exactly what she'd say… Or what goes on in that mind of hers…
Legolas: Count yourself lucky. Do you people have any idea what they have in store for me?!?!? Hmm?!?!? WELL?!?!
Erm… no, Leggy. That's why we hope they're reading the fic in the first place. Elves…
Reviewer Replies
Rauko Nimaurie – Thank you, we hope you enjoy it! And thank you for that little piece of advice; we toned down the speech in the chapter a little as well, according to that, so thanks again! ^_^
Estel Elven Enchantress – Well, hello there you beautiful, great person, who obvious has an eye for great fics!
Legolas: Estel? STOP BIGGING YOURSELF UP!!!
Alright, alright… ^_^
ElvenRanger13 – Ah, a person of few, but meaningful words… ^_~ We're thrilled you like it! Thanks!
hansay1300 – Helllloooo there! Well Queenie says that you're a regular reviewer of hers – and I must admit, after that wonderful review, you're high on my best-reviewer-friend list ^_^ Ah flattery… You liked the conversations then? That was me for the most part towards the end, though most of the chapter was Queenie. It's just that they caused a little controversy… Ah well, can't win them all can you?! I'm going to shut up now and let you read the fic…
Nightshade3 – Well, thank you for having such faith in us! I just hope its not unfounded… ^_^ Thanks!
elfmage – Firstly, very cool name ^_^ Ah, I'm guessing from your review that you're a regular Queenie reviewer too? Whoa, she's brought a little army with her! I feel so alone L ... Well, if I do say so myself, the shadow part was mine… Quite proud of it… beams
Legolas – Sickening. Just sickening…
Shaaadduppp… Anyways, I hope you enjoy this chapter from the Mistresses of Evil too!
LOTR Chic – 'ello! Yeah, I have to admit, I'm a huge Dan and Ro fan, like, MAJOR – hence Grey Eyed Elven Twins ^_^ Ah, shameless promotion… But hey, Legolas torture fics are like lifelines for half the population! Everyone loves them! They rule! Thanks for your support!
lulu bell – YAY! ANOTHER KRAZY PERSON! COME JOIN OUR KRAXY BEAN SPROUT CLUB! ^_^ Teehee, what can I say; the Mistresses of Evil are a recipe for disaster where this lot are concerned – and I hope we do pull you through! I've got exams at the mo… Keep forgetting to revise… Damn… Well, you stay with us and we'll stay with you, as the saying goes!
Legolas – That's not a saying.
Its is now… ^_^
Well!!!!!!!!! After all that, I'm pretty worn out! Don't mind if I have a kip while you're reading do you? No? Oh good…
flops down on bed
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ…………….
~
Chapter Two - Not Hunting, 'Poaching'
"No!" Lord Elrond answered for the umpteenth time, restraining himself from all but ripping his own hair out. Damned persistent sons! "No, not a chance, absolutely and definitely not going to happen! Do I make myself clear?!"
Elladan gulped. He just had to catch him in a cranky mood didn't he…
"But Ada – please – me and Elrohir will be fine, we'll look after Estel," he protested, though he flinched at his father's steely glare, "And Legolas is quite capable –"
"Firstly, it's 'Elrohir and I'," said Elrond sardonically. If he'd told Elladan about his grammar once, he'd told him a million times, and that is tedious even in an immortal lifetime. "Secondly, Legolas is not capable of looking after a dead log in the middle on a burned down forest, let alone himself!" Elrond practically exploded. Of course, he meant no offence to the Prince; on the contrary, quite the opposite. It was something of a standing joke in Imladris that Legolas seldom, if ever, came in without one form of injury or another, and he could be incredibly clumsy at times. In fact, if something had a very, very slim chance of happening, say that Erestor would ever win a race against Glorfindel (yet another standing joke, but it shall not come into this tale, though we may tell it to you one day), then it was more often than not replied with the phrase, "Right; and the Prince of Mirkwood hasn't a scratch on him."
But back in Elrond's study, he was rubbing his temples in exasperation; Eru was having a joke the day these four were born, he thought to himself.
At the Lord's previous statement, a muffled cry of indignity came from behind the closed door. Elrond rolled his eyes.
"Oh Valar help me," he muttered, "Come on, all of you in here now please." he called.
The thick oak door swung swiftly open to reveal a rather hurt looking Elven Prince, a frustrated other twin and a look of pure injustice on the face of a young dark haired human. One by one, they filed in beside Elladan , who shot them glances of hopelessness and the occasional scowl for good measure.
"Well done Dan," drawled Elrohir sarcastically. "The persuasive Master strikes again..."
"Oh shut up," snapped the elder twin, "I didn't choose to ask him you know; it was our wonderful Prince here who had the bright idea of drawing straws." He exhaled noisily. "Drawing straws... Drawing straws, I ask you, where did you come up with that?! I feel sorry for Mirkwood; you'll be ruling one of these days! What will you do if there is justice to be done- draw straws to see if he goes to the dungeons or not?!" he finished, directing a steely angry gaze towards the Mirkwood Prince.
Legolas feigned innocence.
"Just because you're no good at art, Dan –" But he was cut off by a sharp jab in his ribs.
"Stop it you two," hissed Estel, "We still might have a chance if you at least pretend to grow up."
Elladan sent him a seething glare, and Legolas flicked him on the forehead.
Elrond watched the whole proceeding while half-sitting, half-leaning against the front of his parchment and quill littered desk, his arms folded precisely across his chest, the gold trimmed sleeves of his rich plum robes tucked carefully in. He cleared his throat, struggling not to smile, though it was probably one of the more difficult undertakings in his immortal lifetime. Oh, there was some fun to be had here…
"When you're all quite ready," he said loudly. The bickering and mock fighting between the four stopped immediately, as they turned meekly to watch the elven Lord.
"Thank you, that's better – now," began Elrond, shifting his weight a little to look a little more Lordly, "So – Legolas. Can you explain to me exactly what is going on here please?"
Legolas started at the sound of his name, and physically had to restrain himself from kicking Estel's ankles out from underneath him as the human unsuccessfully tried to suppress a snigger.
"Well – erm, we were all just thinking – actually, Estel was just saying how he could do with some archery practice-" (Estel glared openly at him, much to his fathers amusement) "- So I – no, Elrohir suggested that – perhaps - we could go on a harmless little hunting trip?" he ended feebly. He could feel two pairs of eyes on him; Elrohir's seething, miffed ones, and Lord Elrond's pleasantly surprised, passive ones.
Lord Elrond raised his eyebrows in interest.
"Ah, I see," he nodded, as if he had just comprehended the whole thing, and hesitated before continuing. "I wonder, Legolas – my memory is a little hazy – could you also tell me exactly what happened last time you went on a… How was it you put it? Ah yes – 'a harmless, little hunting trip'?" He stressed each syllable to its full potential, a blatantly false confused look upon his face. The twins and Estel had a funny feeling they knew exactly what was coming next, but of course, had no way of warning the Prince – not to say that they felt any desire to do so, of course…
Legolas may not have been 'in on it', but he wasn't completely stupid either, and now it was his turn to gulp.
"Estel got shot in the –"
"No, no, not Estel," said Elrond dismissively, waving a graceful hand in a careless way, "What happened to you?"
"Ah." Legolas felt a hot flush spring up on his neck, and spread quickly along his throat and cheeks, until he had turned a brilliant and proud shade of magenta. Estel couldn't help noticing how with his bright golden hair, he strongly resembled a pig in a wig.
"Oh – well – erm – I –"
"Are you quite alright, Prince Legolas?" asked Lord Elrond in what appeared to be concern; but Estel, Dan and Ro knew him too well. There was a definite twinkle in his eye now, which resembled the sort the twins got before they played a prank on their dearest little brother far too much… Well, children have to learn from their parents, don't they?
"Oh yes – well – I - Igotshotinthefoo…" Legolas mumbled something incoherently under his breath, trailing off into silence. He looked down towards his feet sheepishly, attempting to hide his blushes.
"I'm sorry, didn't quite catch that," prompted Elrond cheerily. Funnily enough, whether he was 300 or 3000, this was still rather... amusing...
Legolas gritted his teeth.
"I shot myself in the foot," he managed through a clenched jaw. Still his gaze was fixated on the floor. "The floor, the floor," he thought to himself. "Always the floor..."
"And then?" continued Elrond.
"I fell in the river."
"Yes?"
"And almost drowned…"
"And who was it that rescued you?" asked the Elven Lord,
allowing a small grin while the blonde wasn't looking.
"The – the maids washing bed sheets on the bank…" replied Legolas, finally letting the others see his face as he looked up again. Elrond quickly masked the sly smile on his face.
"Right. So, all in all, I'd say that that harmless little hunting trip was neither harmless nor little, and that it is far more likely you were the ones being hunted, wouldn't you?" asked Elrond lightly, as if they were discussing the weather outside.
All four shook their heads; though, where Legolas' cheeks burned, the other three were biting their tongues painfully hard in an attempt to prevent themselves laughing. Yes; they had definitely learnt from the best…
"Oh good, we're agreed then. So you see, I have very, very good reason to refuse to let you go hunting, don't I?" questioned Lord Elrond a little triumphantly. As they all nodded in compliance, it was all he could do to stop himself from laughing; oh sometimes being Ada could be so much fun…
"Please Ada," Elrohir blurted out, "I promise, there'll be no casualties, no near death experiences, no attempts at heroics without back up, no tricks or dares –"
"Ha! Well if that isn't the funniest thing I've ever heard," snorted Elrond, "And besides, you missed out 'no throwing ourselves off horses' and 'no getting trapped in a rockslide in the mountains' and 'no drowning ourselves in the river'."
"Yes – well," stammered Elrohir, looking crestfallen, "I was just going to say that."
"It's not like we go looking for trouble," grumbled Estel.
"It just finds us." agreed Legolas.
"Or rather you," snickered Elladan. "What does it do, follow you like a little lost puppy?!"
Legolas smirked at him sarcastically. Eru, sometimes he could truly hate Elladan...
Elrond sighed, remembering with fondness the same sort of friendly bickering between himself and Elros, long ago, on the shores of Beleriand…
"Look – boys, I'm sorry, but I just can't let you do this to me right now without rhyme or reason," explained Elrond almost apologetically. "The larders are full of game already, and you can practice archery in safety enough out in the orchards, without needing to throw yourselves into danger. Besides Legolas, the only times you have ever come into Rivendell unaided were the first time you ever arrived, because you had not met the twins, or because you were carried here half-drowned by the river. Your father would kill me if he found out you'd done that again," he added, more to himself.
"But he won't find out–"
"I know, because you're not going to do it again –"
-"And I only did that once," finished Legolas in a slightly hurt voice.
"Be that as it may, you're not going hunting and that's final. I'm sorry, but I just can't trust you until you grow up a bit. Why can't you be like other children, and find nice, safe things to do that don't mean your poor father has to stick you back together again whenever you come home?!" he added jokingly. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have a bit of writing to do…"
A little dejectedly, the foursome slumped hunched and downcast out of the door into the hallway. As soon as the door had clicked shut behind them however –
"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Elladan breathed to them, a cheeky glint in his eye.
"If it includes the washing maids, then no." grinned Legolas. That would get him back for his 'trouble' remark.
Elladan rolled his eyes. "Ro, you remember what happened last time Ada said no, right?"
"Of course I do," scoffed Elrohir loudly, but quickly apologized as Elladan motioned for him to quieten down. "Do you think we could get away with it?" he whispered.
Legolas gazed quizzically at Estel, who shrugged back, looking just as lost.
"Don't ask me, I just live here."
"Don't see why not, it worked last time…" Elladan broke off as Leithial, a pretty dark haired cleaning maid came around the corner. All four, who had unconsciously huddled together, hastily stood apart and plastered their faces with goofy, fake smiles. Leithial saw through the façade immediately, she'd seen it a hundred times before; giggling softly to herself, she disappeared with a duster into one of the corridors adjoining rooms.
"That was too close," said Elladan quietly, letting out a sigh of relief. He leant over slightly to try and catch a glimpse of the Elven maiden through the doorway. "I should really ask her what she's doing this weekend," he added suddenly, mumbling to himself. He'd obviously forgotten the other three were still standing with him. They rolled their eyes at him.
"Come on," nodded Elrohir to the other two, "We need to get somewhere safer."
"And then you'll explain to us what on Middle Earth you're talking about?" asked Estel. Elrohir ignored him, but led them swiftly and silently up the end of the corridor to the Great Hall, and after checking that the coast was indeed clear, they tiptoed 'inconspicuously' across the vast marble floor, to a side door into the woods at the other end.
As Elladan softly closed the door behind him, the walked on for a minute more or so into the woodland, until they came to a small glen just big enough for them all to stand in, through which ran a bubbling brook.
"Ok, well, now that we're miles from civilization," joked Legolas, "Is it safe enough to tell us mere mortals – sorry, mortal and immortal – exactly what you have planned up your sleeve?"
"I'll have you know there's nothing up my sleeve," stated Elladan in a booming voice, pulling his sleeves up. Elrohir stared at him in disgust for a moment, then shook his head hopelessly.
"No Dan – just… No."
"Right… well anyway – what was this idea you had?" said Estel, quickly changed the subject. Sometimes he really did worry about his brothers. Seeing as they normally did everything else together, he'd decided long ago that they must have both been dropped on their heads as Elflings.
"Well," said Elrohir secretively, the same devilish glint that had been apparent in his twins eye now glistening in his own, "Last time Ada said we couldn't go hunting, we sat and thought and strained to think of a loophole by which we technically weren't going against his word."
"It quite literally took us ages," said Elladan plainly, "And by the time we'd figured it out, we couldn't really be bothered to go hunting any more anyway –"
"Ah, correction," interrupted Elrohir, rounding on his twin, "You didn't want to go. I believe it was something to do with a certain Felithwen…"
"Shut up," mumbled the elder twin darkly, going a little red, "Besides, her name was Threlias."
"Anyway!" Legolas said loudly, cutting off the impending argument.
"Yes… Anyway, we figured it out: Poaching."
For a moment there was silence.
"Poaching?" repeated the other two, not quite believing what they'd just heard.
"Poaching."
"Poaching." Estel looked at Legolas in despondency. "You wonder why I am the way I am?"
"You poor thing…" the Prince comforted his friend, putting an arm around his shoulder.
"Oh ha, ha, you're so very funny," mocked Elladan.
"Well you can laugh all you want, it worked for us last time, no reason to say it won't work again."
"I'm sorry, you've completely lost me: you couldn't explain it again could you?" teased Legolas. The twins scowled at him.
"The point is, hunting isn't the same as poaching. Poaching is – well – an elaborate word for stealing –"
"But we don't like to call it that." Elrohir added hastily, "Think of it more as… "
"Permanently borrowing?" suggested Estel.
"Precisely!" cried the twins in unison, their faces lighting up. Estel shrugged.
"Sounds alright to me." he nodded.
Legolas looked at him in disdain. "You seem to have forgotten one thing; to steal, or rather, poach something, you need to be on someone else's land. All of Rivendell belongs to your father."
"Whoever said anything about hunting in Rivendell?!" said Elladan incredulously, "Dear me no, that would defeat the object, my dear Prince!"
"Well where are we going to hunt then?!" asked Legolas, arching an eyebrow. He refused to walk halfway home to Mirkwood just to catch an animal!
"There's a little town called Amberley, about half a day's easy riding away," explained Estel, "If we get a good hard gallop there and back, it shouldn't take more than an hour, leaving plenty of time for poaching."
Legolas stared at his young friend in surprise.
"What?" said Estel sheepishly, "I've told you before, you grow up with these two, and it rubs off on you."
"Well," sighed Legolas. This morning had been rather eventful already, and it was only midday. "To Amberley it is then!"
"Brilliant," beamed Elladan, "Now, Elrohir and I will go and get some supplies, a few essentials and the weapons, while you two get the horses ready, ok? We'll meet you by the stables in ten minutes!"
Estel and Legolas nodded in acknowledgement, and were about to set off in the other direction, when Elladan grabbed his shoulder.
"Remember, don't put tack on the horses for us; if anyone asks, then just tell them we're going for a ride, and won't be back 'til late, alright?" Elladan told him. With another sharp nod, he set off after his twin, who had already disappeared through the trees.
"Come on then, my dearest Prince," smiled Estel, a tingling sensation of adventure lighting his skin as he playfully shoved Legolas in front of him.
"You know, one day, if you ever come to Mirkwood, I might just actually act like a Prince, and see how you like it then…" grinned Legolas. Estel just laughed at him, as they followed the well worn path to the stables.
Miles and miles away, the shadow cackled insanely to itself. Everything was going to plan… Gathering all its dark and inky black self together, it set off south, borne upon an icy wind, towards a quiet unsuspecting wood around a small town…
~
Legolas - Prods Estel
Huh…Wha-? Oh! Right, end of chapter! I knew that… Ah no, evil malice-y thing… But what is it? And what doe sit want? And what will happen?
snort
Yeah right, like we'll tell you ^_~ You'll just have to read on to find out!
Please review, for the Mistresses sake…
Loadsa love, your very own, Mistresses of Evil… Though this particular Mistress is Estel ^_^