'It is the night I am to marry the one I do not love.
That goofy, ugly, carrot top giant, he is not for me.
My love is graceful, strong, smart, and kind to me.
But, I cannot have him, and he will never know my feelings.
Yes, I have known for many years that I loved him,
and many months since I have found out.
But, how could I not love him?
He who has never once hurt me in any way.
I was looking for Him when He found me,
He promised to help me find Him.
And it was then I feel in love
Even after I found out who He was,
my love did not change, but maybe even grew.
But I can never tell Him, though I cannot live without Him.
I can not share my body, mind, and life with the one I do not love,
so I shall not live. But I feel he must know so I will write:'
Dear everyone ( especially Hiei ),
First I would like to say, I am sorry Kuwabara, that I lied about my feelings for you.
I never meant to lie to you, but I could not go through with our marriage.
Second, I am sorry, everyone, about this. I do not wish to trouble anyone and I want
you all to know this was My choice. I hope the wedding plans can be cancelled.
And finally Hiei, my brother, I love you. Not as a sister but more, but I could never have you. I feel in love with you the moment I saw you. You said you would help me find my brother. I have to admit I felt slightly hurt when I found out YOU were my brother, but I think I started to love you more as well. I loved you for your gracefulness, strength, intelligence, and most of all your kindness towards me. Yes Hiei I know everything you have done, the sins you have committed, but I still love you, and I forgive you. I sincerely hope you find someone to be happy with, and always remember I love you, eternally. My only regret is that I had not the courage to be with you.
Goodbye everyone and Goodbye Hiei, my Koishii,
Yukina.
And she took the letter into her hands, by now many tear gems on the floor around her, and she took the bottle of poisoned sake she had hidden in her kimono for this moment. " Goodbye Hiei, may I see you in the afterlife someday" and she drank it.
"Yukina!" Hiei called, 'Where is she?'. He had searched all of Genkai's temple where everyone had stayed the night. 'Maybe she's in her room'. He walked down the long hallway to Yukina's room. "Yukina are you in there?"......wait......"Yukina? I'm coming in." Hiei slid open the door to the room. Yukina was lying on top of the futon, still wearing the clothes from the day before. Then Hiei noticed the sake bottle next to the bed. 'No way is she... is she drunk?' Hiei asked himself in surprise.
"Yu...kina?" As he walked forward he heard a clink on the floor. "Huh?" He kneeled down to see what he had heard. 'A.....tear gem?' He walked forward, a little worried now. "Hey Yukina.. time to get up now..........Yukina?" He knelt down beside the futon, feeling really nervous. "Yukina? It's....It's...time to wake up" He didn't know why, but he felt the soon to be jewels form in his eyes. There was a clink on the floor as the midnight black gem hit the ground. Then he noticed the letter. "Huh?" He picked it up and started to read. " Dear Everyone........"
Koishii-Beloved
"Hiei!!! Yukina!!!........were are they?" Kurama asked himself as he roamed through the halls of the dojo. Just then Yusuke came into the room. "Hey, Yusuke. Have you seen Hiei or Yukina?" he asked the detective. "No I was actually looking for Hiei myself. Kuwabara gave me a message to tell Hiei, to make sure ' the shrimp doesn't mess anything up'" Yusuke mocked copying Kuwabara's voice. "Ha Ha, very funny Yusuke but we need Hiei and Yukina, the wedding starts in an hour" Kurama stated in a serious tone. "Yah Yah, I know, but why Yukina would want to marry that oaf is beyond me." said Yusuke in an oddly serious voice.
"She doesn't" said a cold yet pain filled voice from behind the two. Kurama started to turn around, "Oh Hiei there you a.......... Inari-sama". Yusuke started to turn around, too. "What is it Kur..a........Kami. Hiei, what the Hell!!!" yelled Yusuke as he saw Hiei walk down the hall, holding a lifeless Yukina, bride style in his arms, clutched in his arms was a letter. " I found her in her room like this," explained Hiei, while he set Yukina on one of the temple's couches. Kurama then notice that a black tear gem had just fallen to the floor from inside the letter, after it came an ice blue one.
"Hiei, what is that letter about? May I see it?" Kurama asked the smaller demon. Hiei hesitated for a moment and then handed the letter to Kurama. "Hey I want to see!" complained Yusuke as he walked over to Kurama and read the letter over his shoulder. After a few minutes of reading and re-reading, Kurama and Yusuke looked at Hiei, then the letter, then Hiei again. "Wow...." was all Yusuke seemed to get out, "wow." Now it was Kurama's turn to try to say something. "Well Hiei, it uh looks like she knew" but a (slightly teary) death glare from Hiei told him to keep his fox mouth shut.
Just then, at precisely the wrong time, Kuwabara came into the dojo. "Hey Urameshi, Kurama, shrimp. What are ya all doing we need to get ready," he said with an all to goofy grin, "and Urameshi, did ya tell the shrimp my warning?" "Now is HARDLY the time Kuwabara!" Kurama yelled at his fellow detective. "Yah baka wait a minute, we have a......slight problem here" Yusuke reprimanded. "Huh? What's going on guys? Are you playing a joke on me, and why hasn't the shrimp even said one mean thing to me yet?" Kuwabara asked, his goofy smile still in place. Kurama sighed and looked at Hiei for permission, and when he just looked the other way, the fox looked to Yusuke for help. Yusuke nodded and Kurama started to explain. "Erm... Kuwabara I don't know how to say this but ummm.... Yukina is ......" he stopped before that last word. "Yukina is.... what?" asked Kuwabara, smile fading. Kurama started again. " Yukina is ........." but once again he could not say that last word. Then Hiei got up and headed for the door. He started to slide it open, but before he left he said the one word Kurama couldn't say, "Dead", and left the room.
"What?! What the hell is he talking about!!!???" Kuwabara screamed. Yusuke sighed and walked over to the couch and picked up Yukina's body. " This, Kuwabara, is what we mean!" Yusuke explained. Kuwabara's mouth was hanging open, his eyes wide. "Who...who........... The Shrimp!!! I bet he did it!!!! He never liked me, so he decided to make me miserable!!!! I'll Kill Him!!!!!!" at that, Kuwabara started to run towards were Hiei had just left, but one little thing stopped him. The words "Rose Whip!!" rang through the room as Kuwabara's feet were tied and he feel on the floor with a huge thump. He looked back to see Kurama loosely holding the whip in his hands. "Kurama... Why won't you let me kill him!!!" Kurama looked at him sternly, then closed his eyes and said, "Because, Kuwabara, Hiei did not do it". Kuwabara just stared for a minute, before he sat up, and Kurama reverted his rose whip back into a rose. Kuwabara's eyes started to tear as he looked at Yukina. "Then who?" he asked. "One minute" Kurama said as he looked for Hiei's ki. When he found it he sent a telepathic message to his close friend. Should I show him the letter? ............ Hn, do whatever you want I don't care anymore, was the fire yokai's sad response. Kurama closed the link and looked back to Kuwabara, then Yusuke. Yusuke looked at the letter and Kurama nodded. Yusuke sighed and handed the note to Kuwabara, "Here read this Kuwabara."
Kuwabara took the letter and read it. "Is this true?" he asked. "Yes, we confirmed it was defiantly Yukina who wrote this, her ki was all over it" answered Kurama. "But......but why.....why did she kill herself?" Kuwabara asked dumbly. "Well duhh!!! Ever heard of lover suicide, when someone loves someone but that someone doesn't love that other someone so the someone kills them self so the pain of the other someone not loving the someone ends!!! And you're the one who watches soap operas" Yusuke mumble the last part. The room was silent for a while. Then Kurama got up and went to the phone. "I assume we should get to canceling this then? We should start soon, the wedding was arranged to be in half an hour and we don't want people showing up without a bride and groom do we?" and he proceeded to call the many people Kuwabara had invited. Then Yusuke got up and started to walk out the door, but before he left, he turned to Kuwabara and said "Just let me and Kurama take care of this, you should go to bed or something, k?" and he proceeded in leaving the room.
(that night, outside, with Hiei)
(Hiei POV)
How could she do that? How...When did she figure it out? WHY did she choose ME? Even I thought she loved the Baka. sigh I wonder how much I am going to hear of this in the next few days..............................................Yukina...... I wonder how I REALLY felt about her. I mean I did get this eye to look for her, didn't I? But was that Just a brother looking for his sister or did I really.........sigh Maybe I should sleep inside tonight, I guess I need the rest.
(Normal POV)
Hiei looked up to the sky and stared at the stars. He was reminded of his sisters sparkling eyes and her beautiful smile. And for what he remembered as the second time in his life, he was truly, deeply sad (first time was reading the letter).
(That night, in the dojo, Hiei's room)
Hiei was fast asleep, which was very unusual for him, because in the makai, you always have to be alert. But, as she walked trough his room, she was glad that for once, he was really asleep. Because if he had woken up at her presence, she would not have been able to do this the way she wanted. She kneeled down next to the futon, looking at his face. He is beautiful, she thought to herself. Then she laid down next to him, and hugged him close to her, her icy ki making him unconsciously shiver. Hiei, I'm leaving now, and I'm not sure if I'll ever come back here again, I...just wanted to say goodbye and I love you. She knew he could not hear her words, but she needed to say them anyway. Then she got up and placed a gentle kiss on his cheek, making him shiver once again. Goodbye Hiei.
Then she floated through the wall to the yard and faced he friend. "I'm ready to go Botan." Yukina said to her guide. "You do know suicide is an awful crime, but I am sure Koenma would have made an exception for you, so why don't you go back to life?" asked Botan. "Yes I know, but I don't want to, at least not yet. I did this myself, and I want to stay this way, for awhile. I need to have a few years to myself, to think and be alone" Yukina answered, looking towards the sky. "So, you might be back?"asked Botan, a slight hopeful smile on her face. "I don't know. I may come back, when I'm ready, but you know, I might never be ready" Yukina said, a smile on her face. Botan looked at the ground, then up at Yukina, " So.... I won't tell anyone you might come back?" " Yes, I don't want to raise there hopes, incase I decide not to return". "Ok but tell me first when you decide, Koenma has a to tell secrets on occasion". "Thank you Botan". "OKAY sooo... Koenma has this place were good spirits can go if he gives them the chance to come back, kind of' like Yusuke's situation, so let's go see him" said Botan with a smile as she hopped on her oar. "Ok" said Yukina as she hopped on. Sayonara for now Hiei, but I'll be back again.
(Hiei's room)
Hiei unconsciously smiled, and a single midnight tear gem fell to the floor. "Yu... Ki... Na"
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