Disclaimer: I don't own the characters in this little AU. Wish I did though. *sigh*
Notes & Warning: Shounen-ai, a hint of malexmale sex (later!), dark, depressive, rape…and the list goes on. Hopefully; one day, this fic may show a better plot too. This chapter is …I'll leave you to find out. Sorry for the LONG wait [I will be saying that a lot] but my life is…messy at the moment.
For 'nii-chan' I'm using it in the sense of a young child calling an older child, or just a way of talking to an elder [male]. *puzzles* Chapter Four Shuichi snuggles into the warm embrace of the arms encircling him. In his sleep, his dream of comfort and warmth begins to melt away, blurring into an unnameable puddle, before forming something new.
In his dream, Shuichi can see someone running, moving further and further away from him. The blurry face of the person turns to him and he can see his sister. Silently, she beckons to him, daring him in her look to follow. He smiles…a stupid little challenge like they always shared. He follows, chasing after her…reaching out to grab her arm and over take her. A rush of cold air brushes over his face, and it's no longer his sister with her daring look. He shudders to a stop and trips over his feet to get away.
The figure stares at him and speaks with no words…Shuichi recognises what is said anyway.
What are you scared of, Shindou?
Shuichi falls backward in fear…memories of this person filling his mind. 'Stop…go away…' A hand touched his shoulder and he struggled to get away, flailing his arms out. He looks up and meets his mother's kind eyes. She holds her hand out to him and lifts him to his feet; slowly coaxing him back to the path Maiko had dared him to follow. He follows willingly…but the figure changes again and Shuichi halts fighting the person's grip off. Mitsuko looks at him, she smirks and reaches out.
'No…' he says, pushing her away. He can feel blood on his face and panics. 'NO! Don't hurt me again!' He shields his face.
When he looks up again, the figure has moved further off, yet is still visible. He can see where they are heading too now. A wilting sakura tree; its blossoms floating to the floor in masses, like soft pink tears.
He chases the figure, stopping and starting with each change depending on who the figure takes form of.
He comes to a stop under the tree and is met, face to face, with Tohma…wings project from the Angels back, masses of royal black feathers, each fine and arranged. Tohma smiles and Shuichi's heart falls to a dead stop in fear.
He can't explain why.
He can't think why.
Tohma terrifies him.
Yet he can't look away. He cannot run. Instead, he looks around Tohma and sees Yuki. The blonde stares off into the distance, but looks around as Shuichi looks at him. Sorrow is imprinted on the blurred, yet recognisable face. Tohma stands between them and just stares down at Shuichi, even though he is barely taller.
Don't go…he's a bad man.
Arms encircle Shuichi's waist. Cold panic floods over him.
Nii-chan. He's a bad man.
Shuichi screams… …And tries to struggle from Hiro's embrace. His heart pounds heavily in his chest, almost as though trying to escape. His breath frees itself in short heavy gasps. He can't open his eyes, the last image of his dream imprinted on his eyes. He fights to awaken. Fights against Hiro's hug, although he no longer has to.
Hiro moves back in shock, fully awake.
'Shuichi?'
A twisted high-pitched scream comes from Shuichi's parted lips.
'Shuichi!' Hiro grabs the boy by the arms, lifts him off the bed and shakes him awake. Shuichi's eyes jerk open and he falls backwards onto his pillow, throwing a hand up over his brow.
Hiro stares at Shuichi's still body and hesitates, unsure of what to do.
'Shuichi…are…are you okay?'
The pink haired boys hand slides away from his face and his blue eyes turn to Hiro. 'I'm fine. Just- it doesn't matter.'
He sits up. 'It was only a nightmare.'
'What happened?'
Shuichi sits. 'Nothing,' he says.
Hiro raises his hands and opens his mouth, a gesture of protest.
'It was nothing,' Shuichi snaps, immediately regretting doing so. He ducks his head. 'Sorry, I don't want to talk about it.'
Light sprinkles through the blinds and silence hangs in the air.
'I understand,' Hiro says finally.
Shuichi feels a tear on his face, and lifts his hand to wipe it away, feigning wiping his nose.
'Are you going to be okay? It seemed pretty intense.'
'I'm sure I will be,' Shuichi says, raising and getting out of the bed.
He says nothing to Hiro as he leaves the room, from embarrassment and from not wanting to break down in front of his friend.
On the small coffee table in his fair sized living room is a note.
Counselling Session: Shindou Shuichi. Today. He balls the note in his fists and sighs. It wasn't making to be a great day in hell, now, was it? * Yuki arrives at his office to find a young man sitting in front of the door, with another one standing just slightly off. He looks up as Yuki approaches and Yuki inwardly groans.
Tatsuha.
"Which means…"
'Kumagorou! BEAM!'
A soft pink plush bunny bounces off of Yuki's head with unbelievable power, sending the leader of second hell reeling.
"Hn, he's gotten better."
Yuki's files drop to the floor as he reaches up to rub his injury, not quite believing that a soft toy could make that much an injury.
'YUUUUUUUUU-KK-KIIIIIIIIII' The shorter of the two men (and the one who was guilty of throwing the plush) crows his greeting, saying Yuki's name the way he tends to when he did so.
'Hello Ryuichi,' Yuki responds coldly.
Even with the way he acts towards the other Angel, he does not hate him; it's quite the opposite. It's that occasionally Ryuichi was just an expert at getting on his nerves.
He goes to open his office door but his ex-counselling Angel blocks the way.
'Ne, where have you been? You're late, you lazy ass!' Ryuichi looks up into his eyes, 'I know I'm not the influence of that,' he says in a childish manner, poking out his tongue. 'We were waiting ages.' He clutches Kumagorou to his chest and the small plush's head nods.
Tatsuha snickers in the background, but says nothing when Yuki glares.
'What brings you here?'
Ryuichi grins and throws Kumagorou at Yuki's head…again. 'Nothing to do and nothing to deal with!'
'No children in need of an idiot to help them out, then?'
'Nope!' Ryuichi tilts his head to the side. 'You're mean, Yuki.'
'Maybe.' Yuki nudges Ryuichi and finally gets into the office.
Only to be pulled back and scorned by the noticeably shorter Ryuichi.
'Not today! I know you don't do work, I know what you're like!'
'You shouldn't act like that you know,' Yuki growls, but is ignored.
'Today, Yuki is coming out with me and Tatsuha to have fun and get away from musty old papers and dead boring Counselling Angels.'
'Ryuichi, you were a Counselling Angel once.'
'Beam!'
Kumagorou rolls on the floor and gets picked up by Tatsuha. He hands the rabbit back to its hyperactive owner, earning a kiss on the cheek, which makes him blush. Yuki rolls his eyes.
'You two haven't gotten in trouble for your relationship yet, then?'
'They love me too much!' Ryuichi pokes his tongue out.
'We're straying from the point!' Yuki turns away as the two other Angels relax into an embrace, looking at him, 'I'm not going anywhere with you two. You're stupid to think for one moment that I wou—'
'Don't be a spoilsport, Yuki-san. We did come to visit you after all.'
"You'd think they'd know me better," Yuki thinks in despair as he is led down the corridor and away from his office, door open still and wide open to all of the Second Hell. Shuichi shakes his head and rises from his crouched position outside the gloomy office block, feeling drained and weak. Again.
With only two counselling sessions he has already concluded that they are a subtle form of torture. 'Punishment,' he looks at the long scars trailing down his wrists, probably the only self inflicted wounds on his body but the ones that caused him the most hassle. 'I don't regret being dead though. They're not here. I miss my family but…I'm more free than I ever was.'
Maybe not, but Shuichi mutters the words to himself again to be reassured.
He sings a song to himself as he walks along, trying to replace the images of his family at his funeral with happy memories of vacations and snow fights.
He wanders through the large square of stone, which is obviously meant to be reminiscent of a town, but lacks town traits. Shuichi smiles at this.
"Hell shouldn't be like Life. I wonder why it's like this?"
Something pulls him back from going to his apartment and to spend time with Hiro. He feels guilty for the cold way he acted before leaving…but…
Shuichi's head thuds into someone else's. He stumbles backwards, clutching at his head.
'Owwww.'
'Uwa~ ow ow ow!'
'Ryu, are you okay!?'
'It hurrrtsssssss.'
Shuichi dares to raise his head and look up, still wincing in pain.
'Hey, don't you look where you're going?' a tall, dark haired man accosts Shuichi, poking him in the chest.
'I'm sorry, I didn't mean too…I-'
'Tatsuha, leave him alone.'
'I was just suggesting he look where he's going,' the man, Tatsuha (Shuichi assumes), looks at him pointedly.
'I really didn't mean too. I'm very sorry,' he addresses person he ran into who smiles.
'Don't worry! Tatsuha's a big meanie,' he smiles and turns to the older man, 'Yuki's right! Leave him alone!'
'Yuki?' Shuichi spots the blonde for the first time, who stares back at him.
'Kwaaa~ you know Yuki?'
Shuichi nods stiffly, eyes fixed on the blonde.
"My knees suddenly feel like jelly…Yuki…I."
The man Shuichi had run into swings a plush bunny rabbit up and thwaps Shuichi with it.
'Hiya! I'm Ryuichi! And that's Tatsuha. Now you know us all, you can walk around with us…we're forcing Yuki to take some time off. You can be his date!' Ryuichi winks at Shuichi, who blushes.
'Ryuichi…' Yuki says tersely.
'Oh, he doesn't mind, Yuki. Hehe.'
Ryuichi grabs Shuichi by the arm and pulls him to his side. 'We'll take you on a tour!'
'I…un, okay.'
Yuki rolls his eyes and follows along behind the three, only unable to escape due Ryuichi's regular glances backward.
He looks at the back of Shuichi's head. The boy is enjoying Ryuichi's narration of hell and the tour.
"He has a cute smile…" Yuki thinks again, before shaking his head.
The tour leads them over practically every inch on Second Hell.
Ryuichi mentions nothing about Angels, or the fact that Yuki runs Second Hell (which of course, Shuichi is still oblivious too).
Shuichi suddenly falls to a halt outside the apartment buildings. 'Ah, I should go,' Shuichi looks at Ryuichi, 'Sorry.'
'Nyaaah,' Ryuichi pouts, 'but you haven't seen the offices yet! They're fun…you can run in and mess up people's paper work!' He looks over at Yuki and winks. 'But! You have to let me and Tats come see ya again! Heeeeeeeeeh.'
Shuichi looks slightly puzzled but nods. 'Sure, that'd be great. Uh…bye Yuki.'
Shuichi departs and vanishes into the large arched doorways of the south block.
'Heh! Shuichi's fun, ne Kumagorou? Tatsuha?'
Tatsuha smiles down at the slightly older, yet shorter angel.
Yuki turns away.
'Oh, Tatsuha!' Ryuichi tilts his head thoughtfully, 'didn't we have an appointment today?'
'I…yeah.'
'I think we're late.'
'Doesn't matter really, Sakano will spaz out a bit but we'd of been waiting for ages anyway.'
Yuki turns to look at them, 'Shouldn't you be going then? Or do you like trying to make our High Administrator do the impossible and die again?'
Ryuichi makes a v sign and pokes his tongue out, before whispering something to Tatsuha. The dark-haired man nods and turns to leave. He nods a goodbye to Yuki and leaves the two Angels standing alone.
'You send your little lover away with no one to hold his hand? Not much of a senpai are you really?'
'Yuki, you don't need to be so mean. He's not a child, nor are you, so don't act like one,' Ryuichi says, dropping his happy-go-lucky attitude.
Yuki says nothing and doesn't react to the change. Ryuichi is a complex character, with a complex past. In some way, the two came to understand each other when Ryuichi had counselled Yuki all those years ago. And it had been a long time.
'I had fun today. You?'
'I could have done work.'
'Hah! You don't work Yuki. I'm not as…well, Tohma's not blind, but he believes you, or just goes along with your game. You write short stories and read books, that's all you do. Don't you get bored?'
'I'm dead, Ryuichi, I shouldn't even be here really. Death shouldn't be like this.'
There is a short pause before Ryuichi changes the angle of the conversation.
'He likes you, Yuki.'
'Who?'
'Uwa~' Ryuichi pulls a face. 'Don't play dumb! Shuichi! SHU-IC-HIIIII! The little pink haired boy.'
'I don't know what you're talking about.'
'He had little stars in his eyes when he looked at you.'
'And even if he did, he'll never get anywhere.'
'Never say never,' Ryuichi winks and pokes Yuki in the ribs, causing the blonde to jerk away. 'I saw the way he looked at you, and the way you looked at him when you thought no one was looking. You looked at him the way you used to look at –'
'Ryuichi.' Yuki snarls warningly.
'What?'
'Don't bring the past up.'
'Puuu. Fine then. But this isn't the past; I don't even know where or when this is. But don't deny your feelings again Yuki. It'll go wrong like the last time.'
Yuki stares nonchalantly over at the apartment buildings, trying to ignore the shorter Angel.
'I have to go and catch up with Tatsuha…' Ryuichi clutches Kumagorou to his chest. 'Listen to me Yuki. I know what you went through, I've seen it all remember…Just think about this, ne ne?' He smiles one last time and leaves Yuki standing alone.
As always. * Hiro looks at Shuichi. Night has fallen and the two are preparing for bed.
He smiles softly; 'Are you okay, Shuichi?'
'Eh?' the boy nods.
'Been through a lot and we haven't even been here long, right?'
'Hah, yeah, that's true. Its pretty tough,' Shuichi closes his eyes as he grins weakly, trying to put across emotion of happiness.
'You were gone a long time today…' Hiro says, pulling back the bed sheets and climbing in.
They had both opted to stay in Shuichi's apartment again, as Hiro's is further off and there was no point in moving to and fro.
'I…I had to get some thoughts in my head sorted out,' Shuichi says, unable to reason why he didn't share the details of what he had really done. He shrugs mentally, and decides it doesn't matter.
He climbs into bed alongside Hiro; the cold sheets making goose bumps rise on his bare legs.
He curls up in a ball and turns on his side, facing his friend.
Hiro is staring at the ceiling. 'Did you sort them out?'
'Eh?'
'The thougts…'
'Sort of.'
'Shuichi?'
'What?'
'I…I…' Hiro trails off and says nothing more.
Shuichi sits up and sees Hiro has turned away and is in the pretence of sleep.
He frowns but rolls over and tries to fall asleep himself.
The small clock in the room ticks quietly.
Shuichi cracks open his eyes, and sees that three hours have passed. Hiro is snoring softly beside him and Shuichi closes his eyes again, willing sleep.
Only to open them again after another thirty minutes.
He spins around and sits up in the bed, legs dangling over the side, feet barely touching the floor. He runs a hand through his hair and sighs.
Maiko, please eat something.
Why didn't I see anything was wrong?
We can only blame ourselves.
Onii-chan always wore a smile…why didn't I see?
His breathing hitches, and a small tear rolls down his cheek. 'I've hurt them so much,' he whispers and tries to ignore the echoes of his family's voices.
He pulls himself off the bed and leaves the room, not wanting to wake Hiro with his crying. The floor is cold and the apartment is dark and quiet.
Shuichi wraps his arms around himself, feeling dejected. He leans against the wall and crumples to the floor.
He falls still for a long time. The fake night passes slowly and begins to get lighter.
He stirs and lifts up his head; his skin feels stiff from dried tears. Slowly he stands, feeling shaky and weak.
He staggers to the apartment's front door and opens it, blinking in the weak light.
Deciding suddenly, he makes the choice to go the stone garden…simply because it's the only place he can remember the way too.
Still dressed in the light shorts and t-shirt he wore as nightclothes he leaves the apartment. * Yuki looks up from his book and is slightly surprised to see a worn out and beaten looking Shuichi.
'Yuki…I…I didn't expect to see you here.'
'I don't sleep…not well anyway and not often.'
'Oh.'
Shuichi looks down at his feet, standing rigidly away from the bench.
'You can sit down.'
The boy jumps, startled and edges nervously to perch on the edge of the wide uncomfortable stone slab.
Yuki picks up his book again to read. Shuichi says nothing.
The blonde glances sideways at the young boy, who is distracting him from the short paperback and he's not even doing anything.
He likes you Yuki.
"How can he like me? He doesn't even know me."
'Why don't you sleep well?' He suddenly blurts, cheeks tinged red.
Yuki puts his eyes back on the nonsensical text and replies coolly; 'Nightmares.'
'Really?' Shuichi balls his fists, 'Is that from the counselling too?'
Yuki raises an eyebrow, and gives up on his feigned interest in the book, setting it down next to him on the book.
'Possibly.'
'Possibly?' Shuichi looks at him unsure.
Yuki nods. 'I don't like to talk about it.'
'Oh. Okay,' the boy goes back to looking at his bare feet.
'Aren't you cold?'
Shuichi's head shakes reverently to illustrate the point that he is not.
The silence is making even Yuki uncomfortable.
'Ryuichi says you like me.' He says suddenly, shocking even himself.
Shuichi sits up dead straight and teeters on the edge of the bench. 'W…I…er…Hahah…I—'
Yuki grasps Shuichi's face gently by the chin. 'Do you?'
Shuichi's eyes search for somewhere to look other than Yuki's own amber gaze, but eventually he relents. Purple blue on catlike amber.
'I…'
'Don't?'
'I…I DO!' Shuichi jerks away from Yuki's grasp and stands up. 'You kissed me,' he says quietly.
'It was only a kiss.'
'Really?' The hurt in the boy's eyes reflect a past pain for Yuki and the blonde feels a stab at his conscience.
He stands and softly places a hand on Shuichi's cheek, stroking the soft skin with his thumb. 'No. Not really.'
…
'I like you too.'
"If Ryuichi finds out about this, I'll never get rid of the fact that he was right. I guess that's what centuries do to a friendship."
Shuichi stares wordlessly at Yuki.
'Really?'
A soft smile traces the Angel's lips. 'Really.'
'Really, really?' Shuichi narrows his eyes.
'Really, really.'
Shuichi's eyes close and he smiles widely.
Yuki rolls his eyes. "This is sickening."
'Yuki…'
'What?'
'How do you do know Ryuichi…he's not in Second Hell, is he?'
'I know him by…'
"I know him because I'm older than you think. I'm an Angel."
'He used to be here. We were friends,' Yuki lies easily, putting as much truth as possible into his story.
'He's an…'
'Angel. Yes.'
Shuichi's eyes glaze over.
'Yuki.'
'More questions?'
'Will you kiss me? Again? Please…'
Yuki softly grasps Shuichi's chin again. 'You don't need to ask twice.'
His lips graze over Shuichi's and his feels the boy's breath hitch slightly. His arms encircle Shuichi's slim waist and he presses down with tangible pressure on soft lips, teasing them open. Shuichi pushes himself further into the embrace, pulling Yuki's head down by putting his arms around the taller man's neck and weaving his fingers into soft blonde hair.
"Young and innocent, he's not the same. Not even close. This is nothing like before…" Yuki thinks defiantly, "I won't mess up again." To Be Continued… ------ Footnotes: Okay. A long wait. And I'm going to fill you all in on Yuki's past eventually…its not a major factor in the scheme of things, but I think its best to show how he knows Ryuichi and especially how he knows Tohma. So, I'll probably do a side story as a chapter. So if Chapter 5 doesn't turn up for months, you know why.
I basically have a lot of trouble at the moment trying to keep this story consistent…but its still fun. I'm not much of an angst writer; the humour [or…MY humour] is always there, so I'm sorry. Plus I've come to realise I suck at writing dialogue and keeping characters IC T.T Poor Ryuichi. And Tatsuha was so quiet.
Sorry for the author bitching. I guess I just felt the need to ramble.
But it's finally done!
Any questions I will answer if I can. Just keep in mind I have my plot, but not all my details [poorly prepared]. Well, I shall go now. ^-^
Thanks for reading!
Notes & Warning: Shounen-ai, a hint of malexmale sex (later!), dark, depressive, rape…and the list goes on. Hopefully; one day, this fic may show a better plot too. This chapter is …I'll leave you to find out. Sorry for the LONG wait [I will be saying that a lot] but my life is…messy at the moment.
For 'nii-chan' I'm using it in the sense of a young child calling an older child, or just a way of talking to an elder [male]. *puzzles* Chapter Four Shuichi snuggles into the warm embrace of the arms encircling him. In his sleep, his dream of comfort and warmth begins to melt away, blurring into an unnameable puddle, before forming something new.
In his dream, Shuichi can see someone running, moving further and further away from him. The blurry face of the person turns to him and he can see his sister. Silently, she beckons to him, daring him in her look to follow. He smiles…a stupid little challenge like they always shared. He follows, chasing after her…reaching out to grab her arm and over take her. A rush of cold air brushes over his face, and it's no longer his sister with her daring look. He shudders to a stop and trips over his feet to get away.
The figure stares at him and speaks with no words…Shuichi recognises what is said anyway.
What are you scared of, Shindou?
Shuichi falls backward in fear…memories of this person filling his mind. 'Stop…go away…' A hand touched his shoulder and he struggled to get away, flailing his arms out. He looks up and meets his mother's kind eyes. She holds her hand out to him and lifts him to his feet; slowly coaxing him back to the path Maiko had dared him to follow. He follows willingly…but the figure changes again and Shuichi halts fighting the person's grip off. Mitsuko looks at him, she smirks and reaches out.
'No…' he says, pushing her away. He can feel blood on his face and panics. 'NO! Don't hurt me again!' He shields his face.
When he looks up again, the figure has moved further off, yet is still visible. He can see where they are heading too now. A wilting sakura tree; its blossoms floating to the floor in masses, like soft pink tears.
He chases the figure, stopping and starting with each change depending on who the figure takes form of.
He comes to a stop under the tree and is met, face to face, with Tohma…wings project from the Angels back, masses of royal black feathers, each fine and arranged. Tohma smiles and Shuichi's heart falls to a dead stop in fear.
He can't explain why.
He can't think why.
Tohma terrifies him.
Yet he can't look away. He cannot run. Instead, he looks around Tohma and sees Yuki. The blonde stares off into the distance, but looks around as Shuichi looks at him. Sorrow is imprinted on the blurred, yet recognisable face. Tohma stands between them and just stares down at Shuichi, even though he is barely taller.
Don't go…he's a bad man.
Arms encircle Shuichi's waist. Cold panic floods over him.
Nii-chan. He's a bad man.
Shuichi screams… …And tries to struggle from Hiro's embrace. His heart pounds heavily in his chest, almost as though trying to escape. His breath frees itself in short heavy gasps. He can't open his eyes, the last image of his dream imprinted on his eyes. He fights to awaken. Fights against Hiro's hug, although he no longer has to.
Hiro moves back in shock, fully awake.
'Shuichi?'
A twisted high-pitched scream comes from Shuichi's parted lips.
'Shuichi!' Hiro grabs the boy by the arms, lifts him off the bed and shakes him awake. Shuichi's eyes jerk open and he falls backwards onto his pillow, throwing a hand up over his brow.
Hiro stares at Shuichi's still body and hesitates, unsure of what to do.
'Shuichi…are…are you okay?'
The pink haired boys hand slides away from his face and his blue eyes turn to Hiro. 'I'm fine. Just- it doesn't matter.'
He sits up. 'It was only a nightmare.'
'What happened?'
Shuichi sits. 'Nothing,' he says.
Hiro raises his hands and opens his mouth, a gesture of protest.
'It was nothing,' Shuichi snaps, immediately regretting doing so. He ducks his head. 'Sorry, I don't want to talk about it.'
Light sprinkles through the blinds and silence hangs in the air.
'I understand,' Hiro says finally.
Shuichi feels a tear on his face, and lifts his hand to wipe it away, feigning wiping his nose.
'Are you going to be okay? It seemed pretty intense.'
'I'm sure I will be,' Shuichi says, raising and getting out of the bed.
He says nothing to Hiro as he leaves the room, from embarrassment and from not wanting to break down in front of his friend.
On the small coffee table in his fair sized living room is a note.
Counselling Session: Shindou Shuichi. Today. He balls the note in his fists and sighs. It wasn't making to be a great day in hell, now, was it? * Yuki arrives at his office to find a young man sitting in front of the door, with another one standing just slightly off. He looks up as Yuki approaches and Yuki inwardly groans.
Tatsuha.
"Which means…"
'Kumagorou! BEAM!'
A soft pink plush bunny bounces off of Yuki's head with unbelievable power, sending the leader of second hell reeling.
"Hn, he's gotten better."
Yuki's files drop to the floor as he reaches up to rub his injury, not quite believing that a soft toy could make that much an injury.
'YUUUUUUUUU-KK-KIIIIIIIIII' The shorter of the two men (and the one who was guilty of throwing the plush) crows his greeting, saying Yuki's name the way he tends to when he did so.
'Hello Ryuichi,' Yuki responds coldly.
Even with the way he acts towards the other Angel, he does not hate him; it's quite the opposite. It's that occasionally Ryuichi was just an expert at getting on his nerves.
He goes to open his office door but his ex-counselling Angel blocks the way.
'Ne, where have you been? You're late, you lazy ass!' Ryuichi looks up into his eyes, 'I know I'm not the influence of that,' he says in a childish manner, poking out his tongue. 'We were waiting ages.' He clutches Kumagorou to his chest and the small plush's head nods.
Tatsuha snickers in the background, but says nothing when Yuki glares.
'What brings you here?'
Ryuichi grins and throws Kumagorou at Yuki's head…again. 'Nothing to do and nothing to deal with!'
'No children in need of an idiot to help them out, then?'
'Nope!' Ryuichi tilts his head to the side. 'You're mean, Yuki.'
'Maybe.' Yuki nudges Ryuichi and finally gets into the office.
Only to be pulled back and scorned by the noticeably shorter Ryuichi.
'Not today! I know you don't do work, I know what you're like!'
'You shouldn't act like that you know,' Yuki growls, but is ignored.
'Today, Yuki is coming out with me and Tatsuha to have fun and get away from musty old papers and dead boring Counselling Angels.'
'Ryuichi, you were a Counselling Angel once.'
'Beam!'
Kumagorou rolls on the floor and gets picked up by Tatsuha. He hands the rabbit back to its hyperactive owner, earning a kiss on the cheek, which makes him blush. Yuki rolls his eyes.
'You two haven't gotten in trouble for your relationship yet, then?'
'They love me too much!' Ryuichi pokes his tongue out.
'We're straying from the point!' Yuki turns away as the two other Angels relax into an embrace, looking at him, 'I'm not going anywhere with you two. You're stupid to think for one moment that I wou—'
'Don't be a spoilsport, Yuki-san. We did come to visit you after all.'
"You'd think they'd know me better," Yuki thinks in despair as he is led down the corridor and away from his office, door open still and wide open to all of the Second Hell. Shuichi shakes his head and rises from his crouched position outside the gloomy office block, feeling drained and weak. Again.
With only two counselling sessions he has already concluded that they are a subtle form of torture. 'Punishment,' he looks at the long scars trailing down his wrists, probably the only self inflicted wounds on his body but the ones that caused him the most hassle. 'I don't regret being dead though. They're not here. I miss my family but…I'm more free than I ever was.'
Maybe not, but Shuichi mutters the words to himself again to be reassured.
He sings a song to himself as he walks along, trying to replace the images of his family at his funeral with happy memories of vacations and snow fights.
He wanders through the large square of stone, which is obviously meant to be reminiscent of a town, but lacks town traits. Shuichi smiles at this.
"Hell shouldn't be like Life. I wonder why it's like this?"
Something pulls him back from going to his apartment and to spend time with Hiro. He feels guilty for the cold way he acted before leaving…but…
Shuichi's head thuds into someone else's. He stumbles backwards, clutching at his head.
'Owwww.'
'Uwa~ ow ow ow!'
'Ryu, are you okay!?'
'It hurrrtsssssss.'
Shuichi dares to raise his head and look up, still wincing in pain.
'Hey, don't you look where you're going?' a tall, dark haired man accosts Shuichi, poking him in the chest.
'I'm sorry, I didn't mean too…I-'
'Tatsuha, leave him alone.'
'I was just suggesting he look where he's going,' the man, Tatsuha (Shuichi assumes), looks at him pointedly.
'I really didn't mean too. I'm very sorry,' he addresses person he ran into who smiles.
'Don't worry! Tatsuha's a big meanie,' he smiles and turns to the older man, 'Yuki's right! Leave him alone!'
'Yuki?' Shuichi spots the blonde for the first time, who stares back at him.
'Kwaaa~ you know Yuki?'
Shuichi nods stiffly, eyes fixed on the blonde.
"My knees suddenly feel like jelly…Yuki…I."
The man Shuichi had run into swings a plush bunny rabbit up and thwaps Shuichi with it.
'Hiya! I'm Ryuichi! And that's Tatsuha. Now you know us all, you can walk around with us…we're forcing Yuki to take some time off. You can be his date!' Ryuichi winks at Shuichi, who blushes.
'Ryuichi…' Yuki says tersely.
'Oh, he doesn't mind, Yuki. Hehe.'
Ryuichi grabs Shuichi by the arm and pulls him to his side. 'We'll take you on a tour!'
'I…un, okay.'
Yuki rolls his eyes and follows along behind the three, only unable to escape due Ryuichi's regular glances backward.
He looks at the back of Shuichi's head. The boy is enjoying Ryuichi's narration of hell and the tour.
"He has a cute smile…" Yuki thinks again, before shaking his head.
The tour leads them over practically every inch on Second Hell.
Ryuichi mentions nothing about Angels, or the fact that Yuki runs Second Hell (which of course, Shuichi is still oblivious too).
Shuichi suddenly falls to a halt outside the apartment buildings. 'Ah, I should go,' Shuichi looks at Ryuichi, 'Sorry.'
'Nyaaah,' Ryuichi pouts, 'but you haven't seen the offices yet! They're fun…you can run in and mess up people's paper work!' He looks over at Yuki and winks. 'But! You have to let me and Tats come see ya again! Heeeeeeeeeh.'
Shuichi looks slightly puzzled but nods. 'Sure, that'd be great. Uh…bye Yuki.'
Shuichi departs and vanishes into the large arched doorways of the south block.
'Heh! Shuichi's fun, ne Kumagorou? Tatsuha?'
Tatsuha smiles down at the slightly older, yet shorter angel.
Yuki turns away.
'Oh, Tatsuha!' Ryuichi tilts his head thoughtfully, 'didn't we have an appointment today?'
'I…yeah.'
'I think we're late.'
'Doesn't matter really, Sakano will spaz out a bit but we'd of been waiting for ages anyway.'
Yuki turns to look at them, 'Shouldn't you be going then? Or do you like trying to make our High Administrator do the impossible and die again?'
Ryuichi makes a v sign and pokes his tongue out, before whispering something to Tatsuha. The dark-haired man nods and turns to leave. He nods a goodbye to Yuki and leaves the two Angels standing alone.
'You send your little lover away with no one to hold his hand? Not much of a senpai are you really?'
'Yuki, you don't need to be so mean. He's not a child, nor are you, so don't act like one,' Ryuichi says, dropping his happy-go-lucky attitude.
Yuki says nothing and doesn't react to the change. Ryuichi is a complex character, with a complex past. In some way, the two came to understand each other when Ryuichi had counselled Yuki all those years ago. And it had been a long time.
'I had fun today. You?'
'I could have done work.'
'Hah! You don't work Yuki. I'm not as…well, Tohma's not blind, but he believes you, or just goes along with your game. You write short stories and read books, that's all you do. Don't you get bored?'
'I'm dead, Ryuichi, I shouldn't even be here really. Death shouldn't be like this.'
There is a short pause before Ryuichi changes the angle of the conversation.
'He likes you, Yuki.'
'Who?'
'Uwa~' Ryuichi pulls a face. 'Don't play dumb! Shuichi! SHU-IC-HIIIII! The little pink haired boy.'
'I don't know what you're talking about.'
'He had little stars in his eyes when he looked at you.'
'And even if he did, he'll never get anywhere.'
'Never say never,' Ryuichi winks and pokes Yuki in the ribs, causing the blonde to jerk away. 'I saw the way he looked at you, and the way you looked at him when you thought no one was looking. You looked at him the way you used to look at –'
'Ryuichi.' Yuki snarls warningly.
'What?'
'Don't bring the past up.'
'Puuu. Fine then. But this isn't the past; I don't even know where or when this is. But don't deny your feelings again Yuki. It'll go wrong like the last time.'
Yuki stares nonchalantly over at the apartment buildings, trying to ignore the shorter Angel.
'I have to go and catch up with Tatsuha…' Ryuichi clutches Kumagorou to his chest. 'Listen to me Yuki. I know what you went through, I've seen it all remember…Just think about this, ne ne?' He smiles one last time and leaves Yuki standing alone.
As always. * Hiro looks at Shuichi. Night has fallen and the two are preparing for bed.
He smiles softly; 'Are you okay, Shuichi?'
'Eh?' the boy nods.
'Been through a lot and we haven't even been here long, right?'
'Hah, yeah, that's true. Its pretty tough,' Shuichi closes his eyes as he grins weakly, trying to put across emotion of happiness.
'You were gone a long time today…' Hiro says, pulling back the bed sheets and climbing in.
They had both opted to stay in Shuichi's apartment again, as Hiro's is further off and there was no point in moving to and fro.
'I…I had to get some thoughts in my head sorted out,' Shuichi says, unable to reason why he didn't share the details of what he had really done. He shrugs mentally, and decides it doesn't matter.
He climbs into bed alongside Hiro; the cold sheets making goose bumps rise on his bare legs.
He curls up in a ball and turns on his side, facing his friend.
Hiro is staring at the ceiling. 'Did you sort them out?'
'Eh?'
'The thougts…'
'Sort of.'
'Shuichi?'
'What?'
'I…I…' Hiro trails off and says nothing more.
Shuichi sits up and sees Hiro has turned away and is in the pretence of sleep.
He frowns but rolls over and tries to fall asleep himself.
The small clock in the room ticks quietly.
Shuichi cracks open his eyes, and sees that three hours have passed. Hiro is snoring softly beside him and Shuichi closes his eyes again, willing sleep.
Only to open them again after another thirty minutes.
He spins around and sits up in the bed, legs dangling over the side, feet barely touching the floor. He runs a hand through his hair and sighs.
Maiko, please eat something.
Why didn't I see anything was wrong?
We can only blame ourselves.
Onii-chan always wore a smile…why didn't I see?
His breathing hitches, and a small tear rolls down his cheek. 'I've hurt them so much,' he whispers and tries to ignore the echoes of his family's voices.
He pulls himself off the bed and leaves the room, not wanting to wake Hiro with his crying. The floor is cold and the apartment is dark and quiet.
Shuichi wraps his arms around himself, feeling dejected. He leans against the wall and crumples to the floor.
He falls still for a long time. The fake night passes slowly and begins to get lighter.
He stirs and lifts up his head; his skin feels stiff from dried tears. Slowly he stands, feeling shaky and weak.
He staggers to the apartment's front door and opens it, blinking in the weak light.
Deciding suddenly, he makes the choice to go the stone garden…simply because it's the only place he can remember the way too.
Still dressed in the light shorts and t-shirt he wore as nightclothes he leaves the apartment. * Yuki looks up from his book and is slightly surprised to see a worn out and beaten looking Shuichi.
'Yuki…I…I didn't expect to see you here.'
'I don't sleep…not well anyway and not often.'
'Oh.'
Shuichi looks down at his feet, standing rigidly away from the bench.
'You can sit down.'
The boy jumps, startled and edges nervously to perch on the edge of the wide uncomfortable stone slab.
Yuki picks up his book again to read. Shuichi says nothing.
The blonde glances sideways at the young boy, who is distracting him from the short paperback and he's not even doing anything.
He likes you Yuki.
"How can he like me? He doesn't even know me."
'Why don't you sleep well?' He suddenly blurts, cheeks tinged red.
Yuki puts his eyes back on the nonsensical text and replies coolly; 'Nightmares.'
'Really?' Shuichi balls his fists, 'Is that from the counselling too?'
Yuki raises an eyebrow, and gives up on his feigned interest in the book, setting it down next to him on the book.
'Possibly.'
'Possibly?' Shuichi looks at him unsure.
Yuki nods. 'I don't like to talk about it.'
'Oh. Okay,' the boy goes back to looking at his bare feet.
'Aren't you cold?'
Shuichi's head shakes reverently to illustrate the point that he is not.
The silence is making even Yuki uncomfortable.
'Ryuichi says you like me.' He says suddenly, shocking even himself.
Shuichi sits up dead straight and teeters on the edge of the bench. 'W…I…er…Hahah…I—'
Yuki grasps Shuichi's face gently by the chin. 'Do you?'
Shuichi's eyes search for somewhere to look other than Yuki's own amber gaze, but eventually he relents. Purple blue on catlike amber.
'I…'
'Don't?'
'I…I DO!' Shuichi jerks away from Yuki's grasp and stands up. 'You kissed me,' he says quietly.
'It was only a kiss.'
'Really?' The hurt in the boy's eyes reflect a past pain for Yuki and the blonde feels a stab at his conscience.
He stands and softly places a hand on Shuichi's cheek, stroking the soft skin with his thumb. 'No. Not really.'
…
'I like you too.'
"If Ryuichi finds out about this, I'll never get rid of the fact that he was right. I guess that's what centuries do to a friendship."
Shuichi stares wordlessly at Yuki.
'Really?'
A soft smile traces the Angel's lips. 'Really.'
'Really, really?' Shuichi narrows his eyes.
'Really, really.'
Shuichi's eyes close and he smiles widely.
Yuki rolls his eyes. "This is sickening."
'Yuki…'
'What?'
'How do you do know Ryuichi…he's not in Second Hell, is he?'
'I know him by…'
"I know him because I'm older than you think. I'm an Angel."
'He used to be here. We were friends,' Yuki lies easily, putting as much truth as possible into his story.
'He's an…'
'Angel. Yes.'
Shuichi's eyes glaze over.
'Yuki.'
'More questions?'
'Will you kiss me? Again? Please…'
Yuki softly grasps Shuichi's chin again. 'You don't need to ask twice.'
His lips graze over Shuichi's and his feels the boy's breath hitch slightly. His arms encircle Shuichi's slim waist and he presses down with tangible pressure on soft lips, teasing them open. Shuichi pushes himself further into the embrace, pulling Yuki's head down by putting his arms around the taller man's neck and weaving his fingers into soft blonde hair.
"Young and innocent, he's not the same. Not even close. This is nothing like before…" Yuki thinks defiantly, "I won't mess up again." To Be Continued… ------ Footnotes: Okay. A long wait. And I'm going to fill you all in on Yuki's past eventually…its not a major factor in the scheme of things, but I think its best to show how he knows Ryuichi and especially how he knows Tohma. So, I'll probably do a side story as a chapter. So if Chapter 5 doesn't turn up for months, you know why.
I basically have a lot of trouble at the moment trying to keep this story consistent…but its still fun. I'm not much of an angst writer; the humour [or…MY humour] is always there, so I'm sorry. Plus I've come to realise I suck at writing dialogue and keeping characters IC T.T Poor Ryuichi. And Tatsuha was so quiet.
Sorry for the author bitching. I guess I just felt the need to ramble.
But it's finally done!
Any questions I will answer if I can. Just keep in mind I have my plot, but not all my details [poorly prepared]. Well, I shall go now. ^-^
Thanks for reading!