Safety Dance

I am never getting drunk again.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not about to start making public-service annoucements against the evils of drinking. I think my trouble have more to do with being me than drinking. Amanda's boyfriend's death certianly wasn't the only reason I'd never experimented. Even before I knew he was an alkie, I had a feeling my body chemistry would not take well to any illicit substances. I mean, I'm not very good sober, so why would I do any bettter at getting drunk?

I was never afraid of turning into a character from one of the hilarious videos they show you in health class- you know, the tweak freak who thinks she can fly and flings herself of the roof with wildly flapping wings, or the innocent girlfriend who goes from pothead to smackhead to crackhead in one long, druggy weekend with her bad-news boyfriend. No, my concerns were far less dramatic than that. I was worried that any drugs, any drink, would reveal things that I'd rather keep undercover.

And I was right.

I spent all Saturday in bed and didn't answer the phone the whole time. I watched Beaches and cried. On sunday I woke up at 4:30 and called J.T.

"J.T!"

"Delia," he replied, his voice as fixed and chilly as an uncracked try of ice cubs [a/n: nice analogy!]

"Uh... I..."

"We need to talk about Friday night,"

"Uh... that's why I called..."

"Let's meet at The Dot at six."

"Oh. Okay. I thought we could-"

"The Dot at six," he said, cutting me off. "See you."

I arrived ten minutes ealy to compose myself. Little did I know there would be a third party in this summit and he would already be seated at a booth when I arrived.

"I'm not surprised. Why am I here?" Craig asked, genuinely baffled.

"Oh shit." I slid in the banquette across the table from him. "What did J.T say?"

"Nothing. I could tell he was really upset but won'tsay why. He just told me to be here. What happened?"

"I got really drunk and said somethings i really shouldn't of."

"Did you like it?"

"I don't like the fact that J.T's mad at me."

"Good enough," he said, taking the straw out of his soda. "But why am I here?"

"Uh... I... Uh..." Before I could answer the question myself, J.T. arrived at the table.

"Hey," said Craig.

"Hey," said J.T.

"Uhohheyimsohappytoseeyou!" I said. I jumped up to hug him. He kept his arms at his sides at first but then returned my embrace. He sat down next to me, which was a good sign, I thought.

J.T. cleared his throat. "Last night, under the influence of Alcohol, a drug that is often referred to as a truth serum for its ability to weaken one's defenses and reveal one's innermost desires, Delia said something that disturbed me a great deal..."

J.T. continues talking for a very, very long time, and i watch in amazement, wondering if Liberty had jumped into his skin.

"In conclusion, I need to know what happened between you two that made her say what she said. You are a friend of mine," he said glancing at Craig. "You are my girlfriend," he said, turning to me. "I should hope you will extend me the courtesy of honesty." Jeez, Liberty did make a border-jump.

Craig and I didn't say anything because we were'nt sure if J.T. was finished or not. He wasn't quite.

"So the question remains," he said calmly. "What happened between you two?"

Now he was done. Craig and I were still silent beause neither of us had an answer for such a simple question. We lookedat eachother haplessly, helplessly.

Finally, Craig stepped up.

"Nothing happened between us."

"Then what was she talking about?"

Craig looked at me. "I'm going to tell him," he said, very seriously.

"Uh..." I replied, not knowing what he was going to say.

"I asked Delia out during the first week of school. But she turned me down," he said. "It was pretty humiliating, actually."

J.T. put his hand on my arm. "Is that true?"

"Uh..." I replied.

"So nothing happened, J.T.," Craig said, sensing my hesitation. "Don't worry about anything Jessica might have said under the influnse. Take it from someone ho knows. Alcohol has way of really fucking with your subconsious in a awy that bears little resemblance to what's real. It's why people drink to begin with."

"What about now, Craig?"

"What about now?"

"Do you still have feelings for my girlfriend?"

"Don't take this the wrong way," he said. "But I never really wanted your girlfriend. I just wanted to see if I could." He's lying. I know it. The way he's not looking J.T. in the eye.