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Chapter 11: Doth thou like random?

When they went outside, it seemed very bright. They all stood for a few minutes, until out of nowhere, they heard screaming. It began to get louder and louder, until a yellow comb fell from the sky and landed at their feet. "What is that?" Katie asked.

Jenny screamed. "GASP! It must be an alien! FLEE! FLEE FOR YOUR LIVES!" She gurgled.

Just then, they heard a distant voice shrieking at them. "WAIT! I SAW IT FIRST!!!!!!!!" Suddenly, the little Hannah burst out of the bushes, and walked over to the comb. She then picked it up, brushed her hair, and left, with the comb in her pocket.

As they all watched her go, Jenny stated, "Hmm. That comb can only mean one thing."

"What is that?" Harry said.

"HEDWIG!" Ron wailed. "SHE'S HERE!"

And sure enough, The Whimsical Wig swooped down from above, with Alex and Shae in her claws. With a SPLAT she crashed right into Ron, who, caught completely off guard, stuffed himself into a bag and wiggled away. Hedwig, on the other hand, landed softly on the ground, completely unscathed.

"Did someone order a spatula?" The Whimsical Wig stated.

Harry looked confused. "A spatula?"

"Indeed." The Whimsical Wig replied. "Speaking of which, I'm hungry. Do you have anything to eat?"

"What about that place?" questioned Jenny, pointing to a sandwich deli.

"Wait a minute!" interrupted Harry. "I'm sorry, but an owl and two complete strangers came hurtling out of the sky in pursuit of a comb, and demanding food. I'm not just going to go get something to eat until someone tells me what's going on!"

"Well," Jenny began, "an owl and two complete strangers just came hurtling out of the sky in pursuit of a comb, and demanding food."

"Oh." Harry replied. "Well, in that case, let's go!" They all entered the sandwich shop.

As they went up to the counter, standing in front of them was one of the employees. Harry would have screamed but he couldn't make a sound. Where there should have been a back to Quirrel's head, there was a face, a terrible face. It was chalk white, with slivers for nostrils, like a snake. His red eyes, whose pupils were slits, like a cat's, gleamed still more brightly in the darkness. His hands were like large, pale spiders. The person was wearing a nametag that stated:

HELLO

MY NAME IS

Lord Voldemort

Lord Voldemort sighed and looked at them. "Hello. Welcome to Subway. May I take your order?" He groaned.

Harry looked at him suspiciously. "Do I know you?"

Lord Voldemort looked confused. "Uh... yeah... We've only met like, 6 times in battle against each other."

Harry scratched his chin. "Hmmm... I just can't put my finger on it. Were you in Chess Club in 1999?"

"No..."

"Band Camp?"

"No!"

"The Llama Love Society?"

"You idiot! Can't you recognize me?!"

"Sorry, you're gonna have to give me more to work with. I'm not getting anything."

Lord Voldemort threw up his hands in frustration. "How can you not recognize me?! I AM LORD VOLDEMORT!" TOM MARVELO RIDDLE!! THAT MAKES I AM LORD VOLDEMORT!!! IS THAT RINGING ANY BELLS, YOU FOOL?!!!

"I'm SORRY! My mind's drawing a blank!"

Lord Voldemort sighed. "Okay, just forget it. Are you gonna order something or not?"

"Actually, I think I'll remember you better if we all just leave. Let's go, guys!" Harry blubbered, and they left the restaurant. "Seriously, who was that guy?"