Chapter Sixteen

They all turned to look at Quentin Travers. He had a few assistants with him from the council, but none that looked familiar. "What do you mean, back to normal?" asked Buffy.

Quentin stepped forwards. "The whole point of the spell, Miss Summers. To erase what has recently happened, so that only key events are remembered. The world will remember nothing except what we tell them has happened. That's why it's called the spell of Illusions! You will remember only the key facts about this little adventure Buffy".

Spike stepped forwards. "Key facts?" he asked dangerously, not liking the sound of where this was going. The man before him nodded. "Yes. Such as you defeated a being known as the Queen of the dead. You will remember this week as being a tough week. You won't remember Spike ever gaining a soul. That was the plan".

"It's dangerous to meddle in peoples memories," snapped Giles. Spike looked at the ex watcher in surprise. He was as likely to defend Spike as Xander was. "You have Spike where you've always wanted him. In your control. Are you really willing to turn him back into the soulless beast he once was?"

"You can't do this!" Buffy desperately agreed.

Quentin smiled at her. It was a grave smile though, with a hint of sadness. "I told you both that you would have lessons to learn that would be painful. Well, you seem to have passed the test. You acquired the spell for us, and you worked together to do this. I must admit though, Drusilla was right about one thing. We didn't count on you two".

Xander looked at Buffy to Spike and back to Buffy. "Now, wait a minute. I can accept Spike saving my life - sort of. I can even deal with him having a soul and being a good guy now - actually I can't, but I'll have to deal with it. But you can't be saying that…."

"They like each other," whispered Willow. "They always have done. Or it wasn't like, but attraction…."

"What about Angel?" asked her mother. "You're telling me you went through all that pain for him and you never…" Buffy shook her head. "No. I did love Angel. He was my first love. I don't know how to explain it to you so you'll understand, I'm sorry. I'm trying ok? I always admired Spike I guess. A part of me did respect him. But I hated him for what he was, what he did. But now it's all changed…"

"It's been a few days Buffy. You can't just go changing you're mind about someone in a few days…" said Xander.

Spike cut him off. "back off mate, ok? What would you know about it?"

Buffy turned to look at Quentin. "You can't predict your feelings either. Stuff like this just happens sometimes. So you can't do this alright? You have to give this a chance. Spike could do so much good for you guys…"

Quentin shook his head. "But it wouldn't counter act the damage already done. The world won't accept the way things are. They won't be able to tell who's good or bad - you're barely able to do that job! It will be chaos within days. What you've seen already is only a taster of what's to come. There will be riots. There will be death. The CIA, FBI and the army will all be involved. You're friends will be killed outright for being different. Are you willing to let that happen?"

There was a silence. Buffy looked at Spike hopefully. He was looking at Quentin. "I am sorry, though you might not have guessed it," said Quentin. "We could have had a great ally in you Spike. You could have done a great deal, made a difference to people's lives. You could have had a destiny and made amends. But this is the way it has to be".

Spike turned to Buffy and took her hand. "I can't watch this," muttered Xander, looking away. "Shh…" whispered Willow.

"I'm sorry" he said. "But Quentin's right. This is it Buffy. It was how it was meant to be".

She shook her head vehemently. "No, it can't be. The powers created a miracle here didn't they? They gave Will the power to set us free. They must have done that so that you could save me and live and earn your redemption. Just like they saved Angel. That had to be the reason. Why would they take that away from us?"

"We don't know if it was any higher powers love," said Spike. "It could have been a fluke. But I need to say a few things before whatever happens goes down. I regret what I was. I'm glad I finally had a chance to prove that to you, I'm glad you believed me. And no matter what happens from here on out, you have to believe that I do care about you. In this moment. I don't know if it's love. It's to new for that yet…"

"I wish we could find out," she murmured, tears in her eyes. "I don't want this to happen. Not when I've only just realised…" he silenced her with a kiss. It took her completely by surprise and she was aware of the others around her. But then suddenly nothing mattered. This was what she had needed. What she had been wanting. She wrapped her arms around him as the kiss deepened, and it seemed to last forever. Everything else had faded. "I don't know what's going to happen," he told her. "But this isn't goodbye Buffy. I figure we'll always be in each other's lives for good or bad. It's just not our time yet that's all. But it will be eventually. We may have to go through a lot to get there….but this is where we'll end up."

"Together," she whispered. "I hope so".

He undid the Talisman and handed it to her as secretly as possible. "To remember me," he whispered. He then turned back to the watchers council. "I'm ready. Let's get this bloody show over with". Quentin turned to walk back out of the entrance to the cavern. "I think its best we go somewhere private. It'll be easier for all concerned".

"Spike," called Buffy as he reached the entrance. He turned to look at her but she could find nothing else to say. Spike smiled sadly and turned away.

………………………………...........................................................................................................................

Spike struggled to sit up, and found he was still on the beach in Spain, staring at the stars. He knew he had been out for sometime - but he didn't remember anything that had happened. Something floated to his memory then, images, as if he remembered it from a dream. There was the feel of warm touch on his skin. There was a feeling that he'd belonged somewhere, that he had once again had a place in the world. A good place. He remembered being briefly respected, depended upon - although he had no Idea who by. He also knew with certainty that it was a mistake being on this beach, that there was someone he should be with. Then there was the strong memory of a kiss….but that became hazy and it hurt to think of it. So he forgot about it. Dru…he thought. I've been thinking about her again. Bloody hell, why'd he have to choose Spain? He hated Spain. Dru had always loved it here.

He must have gotten so drunk last night! Because this had to be the worst hangover in the world. That's all it was, why he was so confused. He stood up, showing no signs of being hung over at all and headed back to his hotel. Bugger this crap, he thought. Only moments earlier, he had been so sure it was Dru he'd been thinking of, but he clearly remembered blond hair. There was only one person who stood out to him with blond hair. Buffy Anne Summers. Impossible. There's no way in hell that she could make me feel like that. No way! She was a slayer. Didn't he hate her? But doubt still lingered in his thoughts. Maybe he'd put off going back to Sunnydale just yet. There's plenty of time for that. And when I do make a guest appearance, things are going to change for me and that slayer, I'll see to it. Then I'll prove to the world that I'm still bad. But all good things come to those who wait. With that, he lit another cigarette.

………………………………............................................................................................................................

Buffy sat on the windowsill of her bedroom window, feet resting on the roof tiles. As she looked out at the night, the half crescent moon surrounded by stars, tears fell silently down her cheeks. What was wrong with her? She should be happy! The queen of the dead was no more! The latest threat to Sunnydale had been destroyed and her friends were safe, and had finally forgiven her for being such a bitch lately. Sure, the details were all a little hazy right now, but maybe she'd knocked her head in the fight. It would come back to her.

She was feeling a strong emotion though that she couldn't name. Remorse? Longing? She felt like she was missing something important from her life. It wasn't Angel, she knew that for certain. Not anymore. It seemed only yesterday that she had been. He'd been the main reason for her pushing away her friends in the first place. But she knew now that it wasn't meant to be for them to be together. But she felt like she knew she should be with someone. She had changed in the last week - but who had changed her? Not her friends, not the enemy she had fought.

She brushed away the tears. Although she was sad, a part of her knew that it was going to be alright. It might take time for her to realise whatever it was she had lost was important. It might take time to remember. But she was the slayer. She would.

"But I've only just begun to realise…"

"This isn't goodbye Buffy. This is where we'll end up…"

"Together..."

The words floated to her on the breeze and Buffy frowned in concentration. It was like something from a dream, faint. Full of confusion. It didn't sound like her and the other voice was familiar. She knew it had happened, but when…she couldn't remember.

Suddenly she reached into her pocket and pulled out a Talisman. It was beautiful and made of gold. She stared at it for a long time and then she smiled. It was all going to work out fine. She was going to be fine.

The End

So lately, been wondering, who will be there to take my place

When I'm gone, you'll need love, to light the shadows on your face

If the great wave shall fall, it'd fall upon us all

And between the sand and stone, could you make it on your own

If I could, then I would, I'll go wherever you will go

Way up high, or down low, I'll go wherever you will go

And maybe, I'll find out, the way to make it back someday

To watch you, and guide you, through the darkest of your days

And if the great wave shall fall, it'd fall upon us all

And between the sand and stone, would you make it on your own

Runaway with my heart, runaway with my hope, runaway with my love

I know now, just quite how, my life my love might still go on

In your heart and your mind, I'll stay with you for all of time

The Calling

Wherever you will go

And that's it. I know you guys where hoping they'd end up together, but at least we know they do on the show - sort of! And that's what this fic was getting at. Expect happier Buffy/Spike stories from me now i've seen the last episode of Angel. Really pissed of about how they left it - although it was good in an annoying way! Thanks for taking the time to read.