Disclaimer: I own nothing...
A/N: I'm SO SORRY for not updating sooner... I have no excuse... I'm just REALLY SORRY! I hope you guys haven't given up on me completely... I'm SORRY!! Thank you SO MUCH for all the reviews, I really appreciate them... Anyway, I know this isn't the best or funniest chapter, but I sincerely hope it was somehow worth the wait... Hope you enjoy...
"What happened back there?" James asked, looking at Sirius who sat across from him on the knightbus, arms folded across chest with an angry brooding look on his face.
Sirius looked up at James for a moment, glared angrily, and returned to staring out the window behind James.
James sighed before crossing his arms over his chest and wishing he hadn't eaten that last oatmeal cookie before flooing over to Sirius' house. The knightbus was jumping from town to town and racing between other cars and, quite frankly speaking, it was all making James feel downright ill.
It's not like he had really known when he ate that last oatmeal cookie before flooing over to Sirius' house that he would end up on the bus from hell. He had no way of knowing that as soon as he had stepped into Sirius' house and sat on his lap because he was feeling neglected, he and Sirius would be promptly thrown out. All he had done was sit on Sirius' lap and next thing he knew—Bam! He and Sirius were never again allowed inside the 'Noble House of Black'.
"I think I'm gonna throw up," James said nauseously as he watched the knightbus stop within one millimeter of hitting and old lady with a walker.
James had really never liked the knightbus. He had always avoided riding it at all costs; all the hopping and sliding around made him feel nauseous. It had been pretty easy avoiding it up until this point, being the Minister of Magic's son had it's advantages. Heck, he'd spent the past sixteen years of his life avoiding ending up where he was at this exact instant. All that work suddenly seemed like one big waste as he was now in the place he had spent so much energy avoiding.
"Quit whining," Sirius grunted at James angrily, "At least you're not an orphan."
"What exactly do you mean by that?" James asked hoping Sirius FINALLY seemed ready to talk about it.
After all, he should get something out of this horrifying bus ride, shouldn't he? It's not like it was his fault that Sirius' mum had finally snapped. Personally, with a son like Sirius, James was surprised it had taken so long.
Actually, James still marveled at the fact that his own mum was still sane.
Sirius looked at James, snorted, and resumed staring out the window behind James' head.
James briefly considered curling up in the corner of his bus seat and crying as the knightbus squeezed between two triple-decker muggle buses.
"Um, Sirius?" James asked very cautiously a few moments later.
"Um, James," Sirius mocked.
"Do you have any money?" James asked as he looked anxiously in the direction of the conductor.
"Yes, James, right before sitting down for tea I decided to grab my life's savings should I be kicked out of my house for being a homosexual," Sirius said in an annoyed voice.
"Is that a no?" James asked meekly.
"Yes."
"You do?"
"No."
"You don't have any money?"
"No, I don't have any money."
"Do you or do you not have money?" James asked in confusion.
"I have no money," Sirius said as he turned out his pockets, frustrated at his friend's antics.
"Wait a second!" James said after a couple of moments of silence in which he realized what Sirius had just said. "You're a homosexual?" He asked, tilting his head to the side in confusion. He had apparently missed this.
Sirius buried his face in his hands, grunting loudly.
James clutched his stomache in pain, once again regretting his choice to eat that last oatmeal cookie.
Sirius sat in his bus seat, slouching, arms crossed over his chest, staring upwards with an unpleasant look on his face.
"Well, I can certainly see where you get your angry face now," James said a few moments later, trying to break the long silence with what ended up not being anywhere near as funny as it had been in his head.
Sirius looked menacingly at him.
"So, yeah... Uh..." James stuttered, "Oh a paper!" He said excitedly as he noticed an abandoned issue of the Daily Prophet in the seat beside Sirius and dove for it.
For some reason, the word 'paper' coming out of James' mouth made Sirius feel as though he were forgetting something.
"No!" Sirius said, breaking out of his stupor and fighting with James for the paper.
In the end, Sirius managed to get the paper out of James' grasp after hitting him over the head repeatedly with it.
"Sirius!" James screamed in frustration as he sat on the floor, rubbing a sore spot on his head.
"Sorry, mate, gotta keep up on my comics," Sirius said, disappearing behind the newspaper.
"But everytime--" James began in frustration.
"I know, they change everytime the paper is published, it frustrates me too, mate," Sirius said as he flipped through the paper, careful to not let James see the front page.
"Can I atleast read it when you're done?" James asked, trying to test his theory.
"Nope, sorry, no can do, I have to memorize them all so I know what's going on tomorrow," Sirius said, shrugging his shoulders as though it wasn't his choice.
"Lily! Lily!" Oliver called as he raced up the stairs, clutching the knot in his stomach in pain.
"What?" Lily called from her room where she and Ava were lying facedown on the bed, Lily reading and Ava filing her nails as they tried to figure out where Ava's lucky earring was.
Lily suspected that Ava lost it while maddly snogging some guy. It DID seem like the Ava thing to do.
Afterall, that's what vacations were for. Even the Gryffindor prefect at the top of the line for Head girl position knew that vactations were for being lazy.
"Come quick," Oliver said, throwing open the door to Lily's room so hard that the pictures on the wall vibrated and running across the room at top speed to the window.
"What?" Lily asked groggily as she got off her bed and walked towards the window which Oliver's eyes were currently glued to. She didn't exactly feel like getting out of bed right now to go see whatever had her brother so excited.
"Look," Oliver said, gesturing out the window, "He's dropping her off."
"You've taken to spying on the neighbors, eh?" Ava asked with a raised eyebrow at her friend's brother.
"Is that Petunia?" Lily asked as she looked out the window.
A young man with no neck and a rather pink face appeared to be helping Petunia out of the passenger's seat of a rather beat up car.
"Yep," Oliver said as he stared with an evil smile on his face.
"So you've taken to spying on your own sister now?" Ava asked with a disturbed look on her face, "Sicko."
"Where's his neck?" Lily blurted out before she could stop herself and regretting it the moment she said it. It was really quite mean.
"We think he drilled it off."
"You again," Bev said in an annoyed and bored voice as she opened the door.
James and Sirius stared at her as they held their bags. James staring in annoyance. Sirius staring in interest.
"So you're Ava's sister?" Sirius asked with his best 'come hither' look.
"Sirius, Bev, Bev, Sirius," James said boredly.
"Lovely to meet you," Bev said with what James found to be a revolting smile on her face. "Do come in, please."
Sirius dropped his bags at James' feet before following Bev into the house.
As James began to attempt to gather all of Sirius' bags, Bev slammed the door right in his face.
James felt his annoyance rising and he screamed out the best thing he could come up with at the time.
"Y--you--you SPIDER!!"
After all, it's not like he could come up with any good come backs seeing as how the friend he had rode the bus from hell for had just abandoned him to flirt with some guy.
It's not like it's was James' fault Sirius had gotten kicked out of his house.
Heck, he thought his comeback was pretty witty... Given the situation...
--Well, there it is... I'm SO sorry if it sucks... Sorry for any typos too... Once again, kudos to anyone who can figure out why Bev is important and why James can't see the paper (HINT: it has to do with the reason he's staying at Ava's and not his house)... Well, I guess I'll post again at about 142 or so...
PotterChick1- Does James EVER know what's going on?
Queen of Zan- Well... Um... He is quite the lady's man, isn't he?
SexxyPadfootMoonyProngs- Yes, James IS an idiot sometimes... Evil laugh It's so fun to write!
Annie- Don't worry, you'll figure it out...
Kawaii-Cherryblossom-Saku- Lol! Thanks for reading! Yeah, he's not gay, but, as his family is apparently composed of homophobes... You get the drift...
Tracey- I'm so touched! I'm glad you found it funny!
Luvthisfic- Lol! I'm glad you enjoyed it! Sirius is a bit in love with himself at this point, isn't he?
Jessie XXX- Thanks...
Buck-O-9- As I've told you, awesome review... Lol!
- You're actually closest than anyone's gotten, but I'll say no more... Evil laugh
Tatie- Sorry... Here it is... Hope you liked it atleast a tiny bit!