PART VIII – The Right Decision

"What happens if I pour the blue one into the green one?"

"You erase Los Angeles and its surrounding from the map."

"Oh." Carefully, Spike puts back the small tube with the bright blue liquid he's holding. Fred smiles "You're dealing with powerful stuff, here, pet," he says.

"And yet I let you distract me, therefore putting the population of LA in terrible danger"

Spike steps behind her, circling her waist with his arms and putting his chin on her shoulder. "But you love the distraction," he tells her with a grin.

She leans slightly into his embrace. "More the distracter," she says.

He kisses her neck softly, making her shiver. His lips trace her collarbone before getting back to that sensitive spot behind her ear. "Spike..." she whispers.

"Mmmh?"

"I really want to finish this. Otherwise I'll have to spend the whole evening here."

He frowns. "That wouldn't be good. You're supposed to spend the evening with me."

"Exactly. And I'd rather have you continue this very nice thing you're doing to me in the privacy of my own apartment instead of here where anyone can barge in."

"If anyone barges in, I'll kill him," he says, placing one last kiss on her lips before releasing her.

A knock on the door makes them both jump and turn around.

Fred has never seen the pretty blond woman standing on the threshold. But when she sees Spike's face, she understands immediately who it is.

Buffy.

§§§§§§§§§§

Buffy hesitates for a moment. Her eyes wander from Spike to Fred and vice-versa. She has the awkward feeling that she just interrupted something very intimate. The two of them are standing very close to each other, and Spike's hand is on Fred's arm.

She doesn't know what to think. She didn't know what to expect when she came here. After all, Spike has been back for several months, and hasn't bothered to let her know. She only knows because Andrew couldn't hold his tongue any longer.

Buffy is not stupid, and she is well aware that Spike is not going to sweep her off of her feet and kiss her senseless as soon as he sees her.

She just didn't expect another woman.

§§§§§§§§§§

Suddenly, Fred has trouble breathing.

Her eyes are fixated on Buffy, and when the Slayer walks towards her and holds her hand with a smile, Fred automatically takes it even if all she wants to do is scream and tell Buffy to go back to where she comes from.

"You must be Fred," Buffy says with a smile. "I'm Buffy."

Fred nods and manages to say "Hi."

God, she should have seen that coming. She should have known that one day or another, she would come back to get Spike. Fred doesn't dare to look at him. She's afraid to see on his face the love and adoration she knows he always had for Buffy. A love that she has foolishly thought was all hers now, even if Spike had never exactly expressed it in words. But his eyes never lie, and the way he has been looking at her lately makes her heart swell with joy every time.

That heart is now slowly breaking piece by piece.

§§§§§§§§§§

To say that seeing Buffy again isn't a shock to Spike would be a lie. He didn't expect to see her suddenly standing here at the lab's door.

The real shock, though, is what it does to him.

He's happy to see her. She's even more beautiful than he remembers. She looks younger and rested, probably due to the fact that she can now share the heavy burden that was exclusively hers for seven years. He can feel that tenderness and protective feeling that never misses to fill him each time he's in her presence.

But, amazingly, that's all. No overwhelming feeling of passionate love. No urgent need to touch and kiss her everywhere. Just a fond and cherished memory of what once was, good and bad.

Spike smiles. He has never thought it was possible, but his heart has moved on. To the pretty and quiet brunette standing beside him. But his smile vanishes when he sees Fred's eyes. She looks sad and scared.

"Hello, Buffy," he says, careful not to let his feelings transpire at that moment.

"Hey," she replies in a soft tone. "I'm sorry to arrive like this, but...I...Can we talk?" she asks him.

"Of course," he says.

Fred has turned her back to her work, and carefully hides her face behind her hair. Spike looks at her tenderly for a brief moment before saying, "Buffy, there's a conference room down the hall. I'll meet you there in a few minutes."

"Ok," Buffy says hesitantly, looking at Fred's back and adding, "Bye Fred."

The young scientist takes a deep breath before turning back with a smile. "Bye Buffy. It was nice meeting you."

The blonde leaves the room and Spike turns to Fred. He gently pushes a lock of hair away from her face. "I'll go talk to her. Why don't you finish your work here and go home, and I'll meet you there later as we planned?"

She shoots him a surprised glance. "But you...I thought..."

"You thought what?" he asks, softly caressing her cheek.

"I...nothing," she finally says, and color is back on her smiling face.

"Ok then. Fred, pet, you trust me, right?"

She nods immediately. "Of course."

"Don't worry. I'll meet you at your place, ok?" He starts to leave, but can't resist the love he sees shining in her eyes. He cups her cheek with his hand and presses a sweet kiss onto her lips. He allows himself to get lost in her scent and touch for a few minutes.

"I love you," she tells him, and there's fierceness in her voice. She's not going to let him go to Buffy without claiming her territory. She has never said it before, so now seems the perfect opportunity.

Spike smiles tenderly, kissing her again, pouring into that kiss everything he can't say yet. Not before he closes the door to his past.

§§§§§§§§§§

Buffy sits on one of the tables, waiting for him. She gets up as soon as he arrives.

There's an awkward silence before she asks, "Why?" There's hurt and confusion in that single word and he knows what she's asking him.

"I couldn't at first," he explains. "I was a bloody ghost for a while and was somehow bonded to this place. When I became corporeal again, I...I thought it would be better if I let you be. For you and for me. I was starting to find my place here. I like it. Angel is still a pain in the ass, but...we're getting along. Who would have thought?" he says, chuckling. "I'm sorry. I know you hate when others decide what's best for you. I should have at least given you a call."

"No, I think I understand. After all that happened...I can't really blame you."

"It's not that I didn't want to see you," he assured her. "I just needed to find my own place...make an unlife for myself." One that didn't resolve exclusively around you, he added mentally.

She smiles, despite her obvious sadness. "I respect that. And...I'm glad you did. I'm glad you had that chance. You deserve it."

"So do you. You finally have a shot at that normal life you always wanted."

"Yeah, well. I realized that normal is kind of overrated. And boring. But I deal. And there's still a lot to do, slayers to find, to train...you know the drill."

He hesitates before asking, "So...you don't have anyone special in your life?"

She shakes her head. "No. I didn't really have the time to..." She takes a deep breath. "It would have been easier if I stopped thinking about you all the time," she adds with a hopeful glance.

He shifts uncomfortably and her heart leaps in her chest. "Buffy..."

She raises her hand. "I know," she says softly. "I'm too late." He looks at her, surprised, and she adds, "Fred."

The look in his eyes convinces her that she has guessed right.

"She's special," he says simply, but the tone of his voice is revealing enough.

"She'll certainly treat you better than I ever did."

He comes closer, putting his hand on her hair. "Buffy, there's nothing I regret. Everything that happened between us...it wasn't a walk in the park, that's for sure, but...falling in love with you was one of the smartest thing I ever did. It made me what I am today. For that, I am grateful. I don't regret a single thing," he repeats.

There's a silence and he can see that she's holding back her tears. He has a bittersweet smile at the irony of it all. For years he has patiently waited for her to be ready and accept that they were meant to be together. And when she finally does...he realizes he was wrong.

The love he has for her will always remain. But she's not the one he wants to go on with. Not the one he wants to wake up with every morning, and spend the day with, whether it is quiet or apocalyptic. When he envisions the future, all he can see is a pair of pretty hazel eyes and a bright smile.

"I meant it, you know," she suddenly says. "What I told you in the Hellmouth, before it collapsed. I meant it." She doesn't say the words because she doesn't want to embarrass him. But she needs him to know.

He smiles, and takes her in his arms. She presses herself to him, but not in a seducing manner. She just needs comfort, and the reassurance that he's back, even if it's not to be with her.

"I'll always be there if you need me, Buffy," he whispers in her hair. "I'm not going to pretend that we can be friends, because we can't. But we're more than that. And you can count on me. Anytime."

"Same here," she answers, squeezing him one last time before letting go. She leans to press a kiss against his cheek. "Be happy," she tells him before leaving.

Spike stays alone for a moment, processing what just happened. Happy. Yeah, he really wants to try that.

§§§§§§§§§§

Spike has the key to Fred's apartment, but he always rings the bell. He likes to see her open the door, her face lights up when she realizes it's him.

This time, there's joy on her face, and a good dose of relief as well. He smiles at that. "Stupid bint," he tells her tenderly. She throws herself in his arms and he laughs before kissing her.

When she comes up for air, she looks at him in the eyes and asks, "Are you sure?"

The look of veneration on his face is an answer in itself, but she needs the reassurance, and it's about time he gives it to her.

"I love you," he whispers against her lips, and Fred's heart almost bursts. She knows him well enough to know it's not something he says lightheartedly. He truly means it.

He shrugs off his duster and takes off his shoes, before lifting her up in his arms and bringing her into the bedroom, while murmuring sweet nothings in her ear.

Like Spike had once said, he had made a lot of wrong calls in the past. Loving Fred was definitely the best one he would ever make.