"Harm, there's something I need to talk to you about," Mac said when she came home the evening before the Patrick Henry was sailing off from Norfolk. Harm was just ready to get out the door.
"I can't now. I have to pick Mattie up and I'm already late," he brushed past her.
"But Harm, we have to talk before..." Harm had missed that she had started to talk and she stopped talking when she heard the door being shut behind him.
Tonight they were going to tell Mattie about them. They had meant to do it as soon as Mattie had returned, but so far they hadn't found a good opportunity where they were all three together and not in a hurry. But now there was something Mac needed to talk to just Harm about before they could tell Mattie.
Mac went upstairs and changed out of her uniform. She had been the whole day in Norfolk preparing for the departure the next day which had included a meeting with her new CO. After she had changed into some comfortable yet nice-looking blouse and skirt, she went down to the kitchen to start the dinner. Being around Harm so much in the kitchen had taught her quite a lot more about cooking.
Half an hour Harm and Mattie walked into the house and they got busy trying to help with the food as well. Soon they could sit down and share the going away dinner together. Mac was hoping that Mattie would 'disappear' for a while so that she'd have a chance to say a few quick words to Harm before they sat down to eat, but Mattie stayed in the kitchen the whole time so she had no such luck.
It was hard not to feel sad and the atmosphere that was usually so light and happy around the dinner table, now had a big dark cloud hanging over it. Most uncomfortable with it all was Mac. When they had finished both the dinner and the dessert, Harm took Mac's hand under the table as a sign that he thought they should start telling Mattie. Instead of squeezing it affirmably, Mac tried to get his attention and shaking her head.
"Mattie, there's something that we want you to know before Mac leaves..." Harm said and was interrupted by Mac.
"We want you to know that we really always just want what's best for you and there's nothing that's ever going to change that," she said with the outmost conviction.
Harm looked confused at Mac wondering why she hadn't told her what they had agreed on. Mac shook her head to show him that they weren't going to discuss what they had planned on. Harm decided to not make anything more out of it now and wait until later when they'd be alone in their room to sort it out.
During their exchange Mattie sat and looked at them trying to understand what they were 'talking' about. It wasn't the first conversation they had had like that without any words spoken out, so she wasn't that alarmed just a bit confused.
"So do you want a last game of Trivial Pursuit before you leave?" Mattie asked Mac.
"Yes," Mac said.
"Why don't you get the game out and I'll help Harm with the dishes?" Mattie suggested.
"Sounds like a plan," Harm got up and started piling the dishes together. Mac went out to the living room. She needed to look for a while before she found the game. That was one of the disadvantages of having other people sort through and organize your things.
After the game, they all got up from the living room couches and armchairs to say goodnight and Mattie went to the bathroom downstairs to get ready for bed whereas Mac and Harm went upstairs. They didn't bother about the bathroom and instead went directly into their bedroom and closed the door behind them.
"Why did you change your mind about telling her?" Harm asked Mac as soon as they had closed the door. They had to be careful not to talk too loudly. Not that Mattie would hear what they were saying, but maybe she'd hear that they were talking and wonder about that.
"I didn't, I just had something I needed to tell you first, but you didn't give me any chance," Mac said. It was all so complicated now. She looked really frightened for a moment and Harm, instead of trying to get a better answer out of her, brought her into his arms and rocked her slowly back and forth.
"My darling, everything's going to be all right when you're gone. It won't be as good as when you're here, but we'll survive."
"All right," Harm said and Mac nodded. "Everything's going to be all right."
Mac put her hands in his. She took a deep breath gathering her energy and thoughts. The thing was she had such weird mixed feelings, both of fear and absolute happiness. "Harm, I'm not leaving on the Patrick-Henry tomorrow."
"What do you mean 'you're not leaving'? Of course you're leaving. It's going to be great for you... and for your career and you definitely deserve that position. You haven't refused to go, have you?" Harm asked her. The words stumbling on each other.
"Not exactly," Mac said feeling the conversation going far away from what she wanted to tell him. She regretted not having planned out what she was going to say better. This was apparently not the best approach.
"But how could they take that position away from you this late? They don't know what they're missing out on. Is it completely sure that you're not going?"
"Harm, do you want me to go away?" Mac asked him almost starting to laugh at the energy he was putting into convincing her that going was the absolute best thing that could happen. She knew he didn't want her to go away, she was definitely sure about that, but his concern for her career, which seemed to be much greater then her own concern was, was really sweet.
"No..." Harm started saying a bit worried that she had misunderstood him, but Mac interrupted him.
"Harm, I'm not going to go on board on the Patrick-Henry, because I wouldn't be able to stay the whole deployment," Mac squeezed his hands tighter "I'm pregnant," she made a quick pause, took a deep breath and then at a much higher speed she continued "Remember I had a physical last week as a preparation for the deployment and they gave me the answer today. Admiral Border doesn't want me at all when I can't stay the whole deployment and Kate Pike has been looking for a transfer out of Pearl Harbor and now she's taking the position on the Patrick-Henry instead," Mac would have continued to ramble if it hadn't been for a whisper coming out of Harm's mouth.
"We're having a baby."
Mac nodded and smiled when she saw the big smile that was playing across Harm's face. "We're having a baby together," she confirmed.
Harm threw his arms out and crushed her to his body. "Oh my god," he said. She didn't think she had ever been held like that before. She was sure that he would never let her go, but then all of a sudden he stepped back just holding his hands on her shoulders. "I'm sorry. Are you OK? I didn't mean to hurt you."
"You didn't, Harm. You never could," she stepped closer to him and put her hand to his face leaned up to him and kissed him gently "I hoped you'd be as glad as I am about this, but I didn't want to assume anything. I know we didn't plan this to happen so early and the timing might not be the best, but I just can't help to think it's great."
"I think it's great too, regardless of all of the other things and circumstances," Harm said, his arms was resting around her body. "So do you know when this happened?"
"I'm guessing it was that first night in the house. Remember, the condom broke..."
"Yeah, but I thought you said it was during your safe period."
"I know I thought so too, but on the other hand in school I was thought that there are no safe periods so..."
"You know what, Mac," Harm said and looked mischievously at her "I'm really glad there aren't."
He hugged her and they both leaned in for another kiss, which led them to end up lying half-naked on the bed.
"Mac, I don't think you'll ever know how much I love you," Harm put a finger under her chin so he could look right into Mac's eyes.
"I love you too, Harm."
TBC