Again I own nothing and I'm sorry about any incorrect medical bits. The part at the end is not from Abby's point of view, just a general one. This is a slightly longer chapter to make up for the last one. I promise that this will be the last medical bit for a while and then I can get on with the story. Please stay with it.
Chapter 5 - One Year Ago
One hour later I was still in the ER. I'd had four more contractions. Kerry won't let me go up to OB without getting my CT results first, which doesn't seem to be happening anytime soon. Susan is still in surgery, according to Kerry her injuries are all fairly minor apart from having to have her spleen removed that is. I am desperate to go see her, check that she really is all right. Not that Kerry would be lying to me, I thought I'd lost her forever yet everything is going to be OK, hopefully.
My thoughts turned to Carter. Did he know? I'd sent him a letter but hadn't got a reply, I'm not sure if he actually got it, or if he did and is ignoring his old life now he's got the wonderful Kem. When he brought her over here I did my best to avoid him, the five minutes I spent with them was about all I could cope with. I hadn't had the courage to tell him at that point, so avoiding him had been the easiest way to hide the fact that I was pregnant. I wonder what he would have done if he'd known. Would he have gone back with her? Probably. Things were totally over between us, another part of my life I'd screwed up. It was probably the hardest thing I'd lost. "I'm not going anywhere." That's what he'd told me, yeah right. I was stupid enough to believe him. I know most of it was my fault, I wasn't there for him when he needed me. He was always there for me, but I needed to be there for Eric, he is my brother, I've always tried to be there for him. Last year had been one of the best and the worst of my life at the same time. The night with the ring devastated me, why hadn't he asked me? I realised it was because I wasn't what he was looking for. He wanted the perfect Abby. I'm not perfect, not like Kem.
"Hi, how are you doing?" a worn out looking Marianne pops her head around the door.
"Not too bad, I just want to get out of here."
"Same here!"
"First day that bad?"
"I'm totally exhausted, I don't know how everyone manages!"
"It'll get better. When do you get off?"
"In an hour, then I'm collapsing in bed!"
"Lucky you." I give her a smile, which then turns into a grimace of pain.
"Another contraction?"
"Yeah."
The baby monitor starts bleeping slower than before.
"Why is the baby's heart rate dropping? What's wrong?" I ask totally panicking.
"I'm not sure, though I'm sure it's nothing to worry about but I'll go and get Dr. Weaver." With that Marianne rushes out of the room. I watch the monitor as the heart rate drops from its previous 136 down to 118. Please stop, please stop. I plead with the baby. I don't need anything else to go wrong, this day has been bad enough already.
***
"If the heart rate continues to drop we're going to have to perform a C section."
"No!" Kerry has just finished yet another examination, I'm trying my best to relax but it isn't really working.
"Someone from OB should be down soon to take you up."
"But I want to deliver naturally, I don't want a C section."
"Calm down Abby, it's not going to make it any better getting worked up about this. I'm going to go and call OB again, all right?" I nod meekly knowing she's right.
"Come find me if anything happens." She turns to Marianne who also nods in return and with that Weaver turns on her heels and exits.
Marianne checks all the monitors again just in case.
"Do you know if it's a girl or a boy?"
"Nope, I wanted to be surprised. It makes it really hard to buy things for it though." I'm glad that she's trying to take my mind of what's happening though it isn't really working it does seem to be calming down the butterflies in my stomach.
The baby's heart rate drops again only by a bit but that takes it down to 115. I look up to Marianne.
"I'll go get Dr. Weaver."
Kerry quickly comes back into the room and checks all the monitors as the heart rate drops again.
"OB is jammed with two emergency C sections, they're going to send someone down now but it looks like we'll be doing it down here."
"No you can't, I have to go to OB, please Kerry, no!"
"We've got no option Abby, it's here or the baby dies."
"There must be something else you can do!" I beg her even though from my work in OB there isn't. She shakes her head.
"Sorry Abby. Dr. Coburn says that she'll be down as soon as she can providing there's no complications upstairs."
I lean back against the gurney as another contraction starts. Please don't let this be happening. Please let the baby be all right. I pray to no one in particular, I've never been particularly religious, now I wish I had been. Perhaps this wouldn't be happening if I had been. I mentally chide myself, don't be stupid this would have happened whatever I believe in.
"Abby?" I'm broken out of my thoughts by a doctor I haven't seen before.
"Abby, I'm Andrea Shepherd, I'm from OB, I'm going to be here when they do the C section, all right?"
"Are you a doctor?"
"No, a nurse." Oh man, this isn't good, it really isn't good.
"We're going to wait for some one to come down from anaesthesiology and then if the OR is still not free we'll perform it here OK?"
"Yeah. Where's Kerry?" I turn to Marianne.
"She's had to take a trauma, she'll be back soon. Don't worry Abby everything is going to be fine." She gives me a weak smile, which I can't decide if it's just because she's tired or if it's because something's wrong. I'm so tired I can't wait for this to be over just so I can sleep, but the baby is determined to keep me awake as I have another contraction.
The anaesthesiologist arrives and I get wheeled into trauma 2 where Kerry is there waiting. The baby's heart rate is now down to 105, and the nurses are rushing around attaching leads to me.
"Have you done this before?" I ask Kerry.
"Yes, twice and I've assisted on others, don't worry Abby I know what I'm doing and Dr. Coburn will be here soon." The baby's heart rate falls below 100. "We need to deliver now!"
I feel the pain decrease as the anaesthetic starts to work.
"Can you feel this?" I shake my head. "Right, it'll all be over soon, ready?" I nod, all I want to do is sleep.
"First incision." I close my eyes, not wanting to know what is happening.
"Right, lets get this baby out. Damn!" I force my eyes open. I can hear the monitors bleeping.
"What!" I look up at Marianne who quickly looks away from me. Why won't they tell me? What's wrong with my baby? I'm left wondering as everything fades to black.
*************************
"She's got a placental abrubtion, hang 4 units of type specific. Call Coburn now!" Kerry barks out orders.
"She's crashing!"
"Bag her, charge the paddles."
"Hold on! Let me get the baby out." She passes the baby to Andrea and yells "Charge the paddles 260. Clear!" and then whispers "Come on Abby, don't give up you've got a baby who needs you."
"Charge 300, clear."
Chapter 5 - One Year Ago
One hour later I was still in the ER. I'd had four more contractions. Kerry won't let me go up to OB without getting my CT results first, which doesn't seem to be happening anytime soon. Susan is still in surgery, according to Kerry her injuries are all fairly minor apart from having to have her spleen removed that is. I am desperate to go see her, check that she really is all right. Not that Kerry would be lying to me, I thought I'd lost her forever yet everything is going to be OK, hopefully.
My thoughts turned to Carter. Did he know? I'd sent him a letter but hadn't got a reply, I'm not sure if he actually got it, or if he did and is ignoring his old life now he's got the wonderful Kem. When he brought her over here I did my best to avoid him, the five minutes I spent with them was about all I could cope with. I hadn't had the courage to tell him at that point, so avoiding him had been the easiest way to hide the fact that I was pregnant. I wonder what he would have done if he'd known. Would he have gone back with her? Probably. Things were totally over between us, another part of my life I'd screwed up. It was probably the hardest thing I'd lost. "I'm not going anywhere." That's what he'd told me, yeah right. I was stupid enough to believe him. I know most of it was my fault, I wasn't there for him when he needed me. He was always there for me, but I needed to be there for Eric, he is my brother, I've always tried to be there for him. Last year had been one of the best and the worst of my life at the same time. The night with the ring devastated me, why hadn't he asked me? I realised it was because I wasn't what he was looking for. He wanted the perfect Abby. I'm not perfect, not like Kem.
"Hi, how are you doing?" a worn out looking Marianne pops her head around the door.
"Not too bad, I just want to get out of here."
"Same here!"
"First day that bad?"
"I'm totally exhausted, I don't know how everyone manages!"
"It'll get better. When do you get off?"
"In an hour, then I'm collapsing in bed!"
"Lucky you." I give her a smile, which then turns into a grimace of pain.
"Another contraction?"
"Yeah."
The baby monitor starts bleeping slower than before.
"Why is the baby's heart rate dropping? What's wrong?" I ask totally panicking.
"I'm not sure, though I'm sure it's nothing to worry about but I'll go and get Dr. Weaver." With that Marianne rushes out of the room. I watch the monitor as the heart rate drops from its previous 136 down to 118. Please stop, please stop. I plead with the baby. I don't need anything else to go wrong, this day has been bad enough already.
***
"If the heart rate continues to drop we're going to have to perform a C section."
"No!" Kerry has just finished yet another examination, I'm trying my best to relax but it isn't really working.
"Someone from OB should be down soon to take you up."
"But I want to deliver naturally, I don't want a C section."
"Calm down Abby, it's not going to make it any better getting worked up about this. I'm going to go and call OB again, all right?" I nod meekly knowing she's right.
"Come find me if anything happens." She turns to Marianne who also nods in return and with that Weaver turns on her heels and exits.
Marianne checks all the monitors again just in case.
"Do you know if it's a girl or a boy?"
"Nope, I wanted to be surprised. It makes it really hard to buy things for it though." I'm glad that she's trying to take my mind of what's happening though it isn't really working it does seem to be calming down the butterflies in my stomach.
The baby's heart rate drops again only by a bit but that takes it down to 115. I look up to Marianne.
"I'll go get Dr. Weaver."
Kerry quickly comes back into the room and checks all the monitors as the heart rate drops again.
"OB is jammed with two emergency C sections, they're going to send someone down now but it looks like we'll be doing it down here."
"No you can't, I have to go to OB, please Kerry, no!"
"We've got no option Abby, it's here or the baby dies."
"There must be something else you can do!" I beg her even though from my work in OB there isn't. She shakes her head.
"Sorry Abby. Dr. Coburn says that she'll be down as soon as she can providing there's no complications upstairs."
I lean back against the gurney as another contraction starts. Please don't let this be happening. Please let the baby be all right. I pray to no one in particular, I've never been particularly religious, now I wish I had been. Perhaps this wouldn't be happening if I had been. I mentally chide myself, don't be stupid this would have happened whatever I believe in.
"Abby?" I'm broken out of my thoughts by a doctor I haven't seen before.
"Abby, I'm Andrea Shepherd, I'm from OB, I'm going to be here when they do the C section, all right?"
"Are you a doctor?"
"No, a nurse." Oh man, this isn't good, it really isn't good.
"We're going to wait for some one to come down from anaesthesiology and then if the OR is still not free we'll perform it here OK?"
"Yeah. Where's Kerry?" I turn to Marianne.
"She's had to take a trauma, she'll be back soon. Don't worry Abby everything is going to be fine." She gives me a weak smile, which I can't decide if it's just because she's tired or if it's because something's wrong. I'm so tired I can't wait for this to be over just so I can sleep, but the baby is determined to keep me awake as I have another contraction.
The anaesthesiologist arrives and I get wheeled into trauma 2 where Kerry is there waiting. The baby's heart rate is now down to 105, and the nurses are rushing around attaching leads to me.
"Have you done this before?" I ask Kerry.
"Yes, twice and I've assisted on others, don't worry Abby I know what I'm doing and Dr. Coburn will be here soon." The baby's heart rate falls below 100. "We need to deliver now!"
I feel the pain decrease as the anaesthetic starts to work.
"Can you feel this?" I shake my head. "Right, it'll all be over soon, ready?" I nod, all I want to do is sleep.
"First incision." I close my eyes, not wanting to know what is happening.
"Right, lets get this baby out. Damn!" I force my eyes open. I can hear the monitors bleeping.
"What!" I look up at Marianne who quickly looks away from me. Why won't they tell me? What's wrong with my baby? I'm left wondering as everything fades to black.
*************************
"She's got a placental abrubtion, hang 4 units of type specific. Call Coburn now!" Kerry barks out orders.
"She's crashing!"
"Bag her, charge the paddles."
"Hold on! Let me get the baby out." She passes the baby to Andrea and yells "Charge the paddles 260. Clear!" and then whispers "Come on Abby, don't give up you've got a baby who needs you."
"Charge 300, clear."