Two and One
by Iridia
Chapter 2
The next day, the twins were brought in for dinner, chattering to each other in half-sentences and smelling strongly of horse. Their mother whisked them quickly upstairs, protesting, for a change of clothes and a wash; for, in honor of the first day of autumn, dinner was to be served in the Great Hall. Celebrian was determined that her children would, at least today, be presentable.
Mara, after having spent most of the day working, had been persuaded to go out into the gardens and enjoy herself. Now she sat, dressed in a simple elvish dress much nicer than the faded rags she had arrived in, at the long head table with Elrond's family.
"I shall take this occasion to formally welcome you to my home," Elrond said to her. "You are welcome to stay here as long as you have need; or, if you wish, we will lend you a horse and an escort to one of the nearby human villages. We are due a visit from the Rangers soon; they know more about the villages than I, and may be able to tell you where to find work."
"Thank you, my lord," Mara said shyly, and glanced down at her plate.
Mara looked strangely familiar to Elrond; but he couldn't place where he had seen her. After a moment, Elrond realized he was staring and averted his eyes. 'Strange,' he thought to himself. 'I am sure I have met her before…'
The human woman seemed, Elrond thought, to be a timid sort of woman; or perhaps, as some humans were, she was just awed by the presence of elves. She looked perhaps forty years old--Elrond wasn't too sure of this, as he had little practice determining human ages--and her face, once pretty, was careworn. Her eyes, in the brief moment Elrond had allowed himself to meet them, had held a strange, feral expression the elf lord could not decipher. Mara had, he decided, been hurt some time in the past; perhaps Rivendell would work its healing magic once again, as it often did. He hoped so.
It was dark. Through the long window in Mara's room, only the stars shone; today, the moon was new and the night a velvet-black. She waited, sitting stiffly in the wooden chair.
Pine, she thought, running her hand across the smooth wood. The memories came unbidden to the part of her mind she closed off; and before she slammed the door on them once again, a few trickled through: The smell of freshly hewn wood; the whisper of a broom across the floor of a workshop; shavings of wood swirling through the air; the rhythmic sounds of saw and hammer. And, on the tools, there were hands... strong, calloused hands, each as big as two of Mara's own--
And then she clamped down on her mind; and the memories vanished.
It was late enough now; they would all be asleep.
Mara stood. She had removed her boots and outer dress; now she wore only her shift and stockings. Nearly soundless after long practice, she stole out of the room and down the hall, a ghost in white.
"Do you need help?" the guard said, stepping out from behind a corner.
Smoothly, Mara turned to face her. "Yes," she said, "I was told how beautiful the gardens look in the starlight; and I could not sleep, so I wanted to go and see them."
The guard smiled. "They are, indeed, beautiful," she said. "Do you know the way?"
"Yes, I have been there already," Mara said. "I shall be able to find my way easily."
The guard nodded, and Mara made her way down the hallway again.
If her mental map was correct, Mara knew, the entrance to the gardens would be in the same wing as the bed-chambers of the Lord Elrond and his family.
Now, so close to victory, Mara permitted herself a slight smile. They would see, she thought; they would see what it was like to lose so much that was close to you. They would pay...
In the twins' bedchamber, Elrohir woke slightly, his sleep disturbed by a sound he could not identify. He tried to go back to sleep; but he found he was thirsty. Finally, he rolled over and put his feet on the floor, intending to go to find some water. Elladan stirred, but an unspoken assurance from his brother told him to go back to sleep.
Hardly had Elrohir exited the room and turned the corner when Mara entered and gazed down at the remaining, sleeping, elfling.
There was only one of them, Mara saw. Only one...
She would have to wait.
Black hair, spread out on the pillow... the rising and falling chest of the elfling... the pink lips, the round cheeks... Mara was fascinated. It was so like her little--
She was going to shut her mind against the memories again; but this time, they were so forceful that it was impossible.
Callie... my Callie... so young, so beautiful, so innocent... long, black, smooth hair, to braid in the mornings and brush out in the evenings... tiny, bare feet, chasing a ball, riding a stick-horse... the horse's head, carved to life-like perfection out of a piece of wood...
Pine... butter-colored, so silky-smooth you never worried about splinters or rough places... hands, shaping that wood as though it were clay, into so many beautiful and useful things... a rough, kind face that smiled down at her, a big arm pulling her into an embrace... Happiness, a foreign concept now, in a tiny town of farmers and craftsmen, a peaceful place...
Peace--another foreign concept, though she had taken it for granted for so long; for now she saw that same hand that had once shaped the wood. Instead, it was clenched around a sword-hilt, such a foreign tool to such a peaceful hand.
There were angry, bestial faces, and crude weapons, and fear; and then the big hands she so loved were clutching at the cloth of a shirt, stained a sticky red.
And Callie... beautiful, innocent Callie... a rusty scimitar... deep, horrid gashes in her tiny chest, the look of disbelief on her face--the look that was a sword no less real in her mother's heart than the blade that had caused her daughter's agonizing death... and screams, only screams, so loud and so long that Mara could not believe a human being could produce them. But a human being had... she had.
And then there were elves... elves, too late and too few... fighting a desperate retreat, disappearing into the woods, and the attackers running off into the woods after them when they fled... and later on, more elves, burying the dead... burying little Callie, innocent Callie...
A scene struck her mind, crystal-clear; the elf, this Elrond, had not saved them; he had laughed at their horror, rejoiced in their pain... Oh, she had not heard him laugh; but she knew he was laughing, behind those seemingly compassionate eyes.
"We are deeply sorry we did not know earlier," the treacherous elf had said. But they had not been sorry, Mara knew; they had been hidden away, feasting in honor of the first day of autumn, while her daughter died.
Oh, they said, yes, that they had not known, and that the first group had been a patrol too small to defeat the enemy, and could only lead them away. The elves had claimed that only later could they bring their full strength to bear against the little town's attackers; but she knew better.
They had done it on purpose. They reveled in death, loved destruction. Even the heavy losses they had supposedly taken in "defense" of her village were part of their game. They were no better than the beasts who had attacked them; most likely, they were in league with them.
And now, they would know what she had known: what it had beem like to lose all that she loved...
Mara snapped out of her reverie, all sense of control washed away in a single moment. Gone was the mask she had worn: The cheerful, hard-working woman the elves in the kitchens had so loved was dead; in their place was something less than human.
She looked down, now, and saw the brat of the one who had killed her child, her dear, black-haired daughter; and she felt no more grief; only the blind, desperate rage of a cornered animal.
Her right hand came out of the folds of her white shift; and in it flashed a large knife, the kind the cooks used to cut up meat. As though in a dream, she raised it, then brought it down, raised it again, mechanically. Blood--black in the heavy darkness--stained the sheets.
TBC...
Reviews:
Anorwen: Freaking you out, huh? I must be doing something right!
Tinkerbell: Evil woman? Oh, you mean me! Thank you! :)