Title: The Bill's (no pun intended) To Protect Our Sister
Rating: PG
Summary: "Thus, here is a list of what we will do to specific people in the event that Ginny sets her affections on one of the following hormonal male teenagers." The Weasley brothers try to stop Ginny from dating. Sequel to 'We, the Weasley Brothers' and set in the same universe as Caught Unawares.
A/N: Hey! I finally got around to posting this up, thank god! I just had orientation today and classes start on Friday and I'm taking a SAT course and applying for college. This year is going to be hell. But anywho, I'm not sure if I put everyone on this list, so if I'm missing any male students in Ginny's year or above, please tell me and I'll make sure to add them in.
Disclaimer: Harry Potter? Belong to me? What have you been smoking?!?
The Bill's To Protect Our Sister
We, the Weasley Brothers (but mainly Fred and George), have come upon the decision that the Bill's to Protect Our Sister (no pun intended, of course) is not enough to prevent our most feared dreams. Thus, here is a list of what we will do for specific people in the event that Ginny sets her affections on one of the following hormonal male teenagers.
Note: Placed in alphabetical order at Percy's request.
Boot, Terry – Use Bill's dragonhide boots to give Boot a nice big kick right up the arse.
Corner, Michael – In the unlikely event that he once again tries to feel up our beloved sister, try the same approach as last time. This time, however, make his you-know-what disappear for a month.
Crabbe, Vincent –We find it unnecessary to waste our precious and most bountiful brain power to think up of something good for Crabbe. The day Ginny dates him will be the day when the dementors decide to change their uniform drab black robes to a bright yellow.
Creevey, Colin – Cover him in algae and throw him into the Squid. Make sure to call in that favor from the giant squid, he owes us for not telling Filch about his "little" girlfriend.
Creevey, Dennis - Take Creevey to Owlery. Perform Imperius Curse on him, and make him think he's an owl. Hand him a package. The rest will take care of itself. courtesy of AllStarSeeker21
Finch-Fletchley, Justin – Douse him in butterbeer. Introduce him to Winky. "Accidentally" allow Ginny to walk in on the hicky covered, wild, house elf lovin side of Finch-Fletchley.
Finnegan, Seamus – Lock him in a broom closet for a week with Millicent Bulstrode. Let nature (or shall we say er, Bulstrode) take it's course. Make sure to bribe Bulstrode, if necessary.
Goyle, Gregory –see Crabbe, Vincenet
Macmillan, Ernie –Charm the P on his prefect badge to stand for pervert. Enchant him so that whenever he is in the prescence of Ginny he makes lewd comments directed at his fellow male students.
Malfoy, Draco –Enchant bludger so that it is invisible to all but Malfoy. Bewitch bludger to follow him around the school and hit him repeatedly in his testicles. Note to self: Make sure to attach note saying who the bludger is from.
Nott, Thomas –Drop him in a vat of hot lard.
Potter, Harry – Harry? What are you talking about, that would never happen!!
Smith, Zacharias –Follow through with threat made at Hog's Head last Christmas.
Thomas, Dean – Tell Ginny about that time after the Quidditch game where he got completely pissed and was caught making out with Mrs. Norris in a broom closet. Make sure to omit the part of him being pissed.
Zabini, Blaise – Transfigure his clothes into that of an American cowboy. Take him into the Forbidden Forest and introduce centaurs. Convince centaurs that he is, in fact, just trying to round them up.
Please note that we are not above using Unforgivables as mentioned above. Everything we day we will do, we will! In case our tactics fail an emergency meeting will be called at the earliest convenience for all parties involved
The Weasley Brothers
A/N: Review, please!!!!!
