Previously, Naruto bombed Himawari's birthday, Boruto's pissed & Sarada is starting to see more than she's supposed to.
a foreign mind
Five months had to pass before Naruto saw Sasuke again. It was three months ago that he had heard anything about Sasuke, and that was only through his son's team. That too was only by coincidence.
Naruto was pissed.
Now, Sasuke was just lounging on one of the open windows in the Hokage's office, as though he had just been gone for a short walk.
At least, Naruto would have been pissed had Sasuke not come into the office covered from head to toe in cuts and bruises. Naruto resisted the urge to rush over and check for anything fatal.
He settled for simply asking, "You okay, Sas?"
Sasuke let out an annoyed tch at the nickname, though he had long since given up fighting it.
Naruto grinned. Sasuke wouldn't have cared enough to react if he were in terrible pain.
Why was it that the mere presence of Sasuke was enough to lift Naruto's mood, even though he should be pissed?
"Sas, you'll be staying a while in the village this time, right? Sarada was…"
Sasuke strode over to Naruto and leaned over him, the killing the rest of the words in Naruto's throat when he realized Sasuke was so close one could make out individual lashes on his eyes. Sasuke touched the bags under Naruto's eyes, frowning.
"You're not sleeping again," Sasuke said.
Naruto leaned away. "Wayyy too close, man. I have a wife! And kids!" he said, trying to clamp down on the inexplicable heat rushing through his cheeks. What the fuck?
"Dumbass," Sasuke muttered and stepped back, his face twisting as though he smelled something rotten. "You didn't answer my question."
"Was it really a question, though?"
Sasuke looked at him pointedly.
Naruto looked away. It wasn't like he wasn't trying to sleep. He just couldn't.
Not since last year, when Sasuke had taken much too long to return. He hadn't responded to any of his letters for nigh on three months. Which was not too long, but Naruto'd had a particularly bad feeling at the time and had gone out on a limb to search for Sasuke. It took Naruto days to finally track him down, and when he did, he found Sasuke close to dying in a pool of his own blood. Had Naruto not found him any sooner, Sasuke could have easily died. And that thought did not sit very well with Naruto.
It didn't seem to concern Sasuke in the slightest, and it pissed Naruto off.
And so, Sasuke had doomed Naruto into a whirlwind of worry every time he was gone for long periods of time without any contact. Like this time.
It hurt.
It was as if Sasuke never really thought about Naruto when he was away. As if he saw Naruto's letters a nuisance and couldn't be bothered to answer back.
It was always Naruto chasing after him, wasn't it?
"If you're so worried about my sleep, how about you respond back once in a while?" Naruto sniped, though his irritation was directed more at himself at this point.
But Sasuke had enough grace to look away, but not before Naruto saw a little guilt trickle into his eyes.
Good, Naruto thought with some satisfaction. Then he winced at himself. The hell am I being so petty for?
Why couldn't he just move on? It was clear Sasuke moved on.
Moved on from what, exactly?
Naruto had a feeling that that was a dangerous train of thought that he should avoid spiraling into. He wasn't entirely sure what was dangerous about it, though. He just knew he was a little relieved when Sasuke finally broke the silence.
"Why do you…care…so much?"
The question caught Naruto off guard. Sasuke had his lips pressed into a thin line, a strange expression shadowing his face.
"Why…do I…care?" Naruto repeated him.
Is he fucking serious?
"Are you seriously asking me that? After all these years?"
When Sasuke simply looked on, clearly waiting for an answer, Naruto shook his head, bewildered. "I—we care about you because you're still our teammate. You're my best friend and you're Sakura's husband, you're Sarada's dad and Boruto's sensei. Sakura and Sarada miss you, so why don't you come home at least for them?"
The way Sasuke looked at him gave Naruto the bizarre feeling that Sasuke was somehow disappointed with the answer.
What the heck was he looking for?
He could never tell what went on in the bastard's mind.
Naruto leaned back in his chair again, running a hand through his own hair. "Sas, I'm tired of worrying about you. Please, just write back once in a while. I know you're not good with words, so even just a single word helps, alright?" He snorted wryly. "Hell, I'd be fine if you'd just sent me a literal 'I'm alive' once in a while."
"Okay."
Naruto looked up at Sasuke, surprised at the lack of resistance. Then he slumped back in his chair. This was not the first time Naruto had asked Sasuke to respond back to his letters. This was not the first time Naruto still had to wait months for an answer.
"Here's my report," said Sasuke after a long moment, handing Naruto a scroll. "I will go see my wife and daughter, now." He whirled around and left the office, leaving Naruto to stare after him, a little perplexed.
Geez.
Naruto folded his arms on the table and buried his face in them, somehow managing to feel even more fatigued.
Why was Sasuke so tiring?
What happened to the easy companionship they used to have before?
When did everything change?
Naruto was giving Himawari a piggyback ride around the village, laughing at something she said when he spotted Sasuke and Sakura eating outside a restaurant. He took a step towards them, but then paused when he noticed that Sakura was looking especially dressed up. From that distance, Naruto could see a faint smile on Sasuke's face as he looked at her. It was quite a soft smile, one that had twisted something in Naruto's chest for some odd reason. Naruto didn't think he'd ever seen Sasuke smile like that.
They're on a date.
Naruto rubbed his chest, feeling a heartburn. He wondered if he'd already become that old. He hadn't even eaten anything that spicy today.
Time flew by way too quickly.
"Papa?" Himawari nuzzled her cheek into his neck. "What's wrong?"
"Hmm." Naruto nuzzled her back, his body relaxing a little as his attention was brought back to his little daughter. "Papa was feeling a little stomach ache but it's all better now. Ya know why?"
"Why?"
Naruto grinned, twisting behind to give her a kiss on the cheek. "Because you make everything better!"
Himawari giggled and wrapped her arms around his neck, snuggling close to him. "I'm happy papa is better 'cos of me."
"What do ya wanna do now?" Naruto asked, eager to get out of there.
Himawari bounced in his arms. "Take me up to the Hokage mountain! Fly! Fly!"
Naruto chuckled. "You know it's not flying, Hima."
Himawari only snickered and kicked his hips as if he were a horse. "Go! Go! Go!"
"Okay, okay, I'm going." Shaking his head with a snort, he took to the roofs.
"Weee!" Himawari laughed, stretching her arms out.
He loved her so much.
One final leap and Naruto landed on his dad's head.
"Tou-chan?" Boruto looked up from where he was sitting on the edge of the stone head, looking over the village.
"Nii-san!"
Naruto yelped when Himawari jumped down from his back. She rushed up to Boruto and hugged him.
Boruto softened, ruffling Himawari's hair. "Hey, Hima. What've you been up to?"
Himawari bounced. "You know, you know! Papa took me to all my favorite…"
As she launched into her day's adventures, an idea struck Naruto. He had taken the day off, trained with Boruto earlier in the day, and spent most of the afternoon with Himawari. One last person remained. "Boruto, do you mind looking after your sister this evening?"
Boruto's face darkened. "Why? To go back to being Hokage?"
Naruto winced, though he knew it was warranted. He'd tried his best to spend more time with his family, and while he was making some progress, it was still a rough transition.
"No," Naruto said and pointed a thumb at himself. "I'm gonna take your mom out on a date."
Boruto's eyes widened at that. "No way. Really?"
"Uhuh!" Naruto figured maybe that was why he felt weird about seeing Sasuke and Sakura together on a date. Because he hadn't been on a date with Hinata in so long. Hokage and parenthood had gotten in the way of any romance they used to have. Naruto couldn't even remember the last time they had any time to themselves.
"Yayyy! A date! A date!" Himawari cheered and clapped her hands. "Where are we gonna go?"
Boruto laughed. "That's not how it works, Hima. You can't go."
Himawari's face fell. "Why not? I want our family together."
Naruto crouched down and took her hand in both of his, smiling at her pouting lips. "Tell ya what, Hima-chan. I will come back early from work tomorrow, and we can all go for a picnic together. Papa's promise. How does that sound?"
Himawari brightened up and jumped into Naruto's arms. "That sounds great! I can't wait!"
Naruto laughed and hugged her, fluffing her hair.
Boruto's hard eyes were on Naruto, promising all sorts of pain if Naruto didn't keep his promise. Naruto nodded, accepting it. He held his arm out for Boruto. The kid took one step toward him, but then stopped himself, looking away.
A little hurt, Naruto dropped his arm and hugged Himawari back.
Well, that was expected. But Naruto had time. He had lots of time to make up with his family.
After a nice dinner, Naruto and Hinata took a stroll around the quiet village.
"Naruto-kun," Hinata said, leaning into him, "thank you for this. It's been so long since we last had a nice evening like this."
Naruto wrapped his arm around her shoulders, pulling her close to him. "We'll do this more often. I…I'm sorry I just…"
Hinata put a finger on his lips. "Hush now. Enough apologies. I know how much being Hokage means to you. Believe me, I know. It was all you would talk about ever since you were four. You also didn't have a family to model for you, either. Don't blame yourself. What's important is that you listened to us and are making changes. Boruto and Hima both look a lot happier these days."
Naruto smiled faintly, glad that at least some parts of his life were looking better. He took her hand and kissed her knuckles. He was lucky to have Hinata. He truly was. This woman, who had recognized his worth so long before anyone else had. Whose eyes saw much beyond her almost 360-degree vision. Who patiently waited for him as he came to realize his own feelings for her. Who bore his two beautiful children and built him a family for him to look forward to returning to at the end of each day.
He remembered the first few months of their marriage. The thrill he'd feel at the lights he'd see switched on in his apartment as he came back from a mission. Of the delicious smells that would greet him when he stepped foot inside his apartment. Of the joy he'd feel when he'd look around him and feel like his apartment was finally something he could call home.
Smiling, Naruto pulled Hinata in closer, glad that she had such a big heart to forgive him like this. As they neared home, Naruto noticed how the windows were all pitch black. The kids must have gone to sleep.
Looking forward to a quiet night in which he can relax, he eased the door open and slipped inside after Hinata.
"Hey," Hinata whispered. She took hold of his hand again and cupped his cheek with her other hand. She looked at him with pale, lilac eyes that pulled him in, surrounding him in a blanket of comfort. Her eyes slowly closed as her face tilted, leaning forward, pulling Naruto's attention to her lips. He took them in a soft kiss and traced his hand up her body, feeling her every curve. He wondered when the last time they were intimate was because it felt as though she became curvier than he remembered—
The light suddenly switched on, and they both froze. By the stairs stood Boruto, also frozen, staring at them with his mouth wide open.
Hinata quickly pulled herself off Naruto, turning red. "H-Hey, Boruto. Thought you were asleep."
"I—I was. I heard noises."
"Ah. Sorry we woke you." Naruto brushed the back of his head, chuckling nervously.
"N-No—I'm—sorry." Boruto turned just as brilliant red as his mother. "I—I'm gonna go!" His voice cracked into a high note, and he turned tail, running back up the stairs before either of them could say anything else.
Naruto swore the kid was trying hard not to grin.
Before he could wonder about that, Hinata took his hand and led him up to their bedroom. Closing the door, Hinata kissed him again. The sweet taste of her lips made Naruto remember the first time he had kissed her. It remained, even after more than a decade of being together. He breathed her in, relishing in her familiar embrace.
Hinata broke their kiss and Naruto was caught by surprise when she pushed him onto their bed and clambered on top of him, her kisses becoming more urgent. She slipped her hand beneath his shirt, tracing up and down his skin.
What was it that Sakura used to say?
I t's always the quiet ones you need to look out for.
The comment had made him wonder how Sasuke was in bed, for her to say that.
His thoughts sputtered to a halt when Hinata rolled her hips against his hardening length, and he caught hold of her hands and rolled over, pinning her under him. Her pale eyes were almost silver in the moonlight, her wet lips were curved into a sly smile, her dark hair contrasted so strikingly against her pale skin, everything about her was so breathtaking.
"The door's locked, yes?" Naruto asked softly, remembering that one time when Himawari had walked in on them. He was thankful the poor child was too young to remember anything.
"Of course." Hinata pulled Naruto into another deep kiss.
Naruto stayed awake long after, staring out the window, the moon slowly rising as the night progressed. Hinata had long since fallen asleep in his arms, and he stared at her peaceful, sleeping face.
He could never sleep on nights like these. Something always felt…off.
It never made sense to him. He loved Hinata. He truly did.
He brushed his fingers through her dark silky hair. There was no way he didn't love her. He cherished her. He couldn't imagine what his life might have been like without her. No one loved him as she did. She'd given him all the love that he'd craved for his entire life.
Yet, making love to her was…strange.
It wasn't as if he didn't like having sex with her, of course, he did. And it was nothing on her part. She was amazing, she was beautiful, and the way she'd look at him with so much love felt amazing—at first.
Then it started to feel…overwhelming. He was starting to feel unworthy of all that love. He didn't feel like he was giving even half of all that love back to her.
Even to this day, after everything Naruto had put her through, she still loves him so much. He hardly understood it back then. He understood it even less now.
It felt as if he couldn't ever make it up to her.
It wasn't as if she was asking for too much. Hinata wasn't like that. She never asked for anything.
That made him feel even less worthy.
Had it always been like that?
What had it been like before? Back when they were newly married and weren't occupied by kids and huge responsibilities? Back then, he'd been excited. Everything was new.
Yet, the love he felt for Hinata back then felt the same as how he felt for her now. His feelings for her have not changed. If anything, all those years of being with her only made his feelings for her mature into more than just love. Hinata was everything to him. She was his family. She was his home. There was no way he was falling out of love with her. No way.
His head was starting to feel heavy, and he leaned back against the wall.
He was thinking too hard about this when there really was no point to it. He was just making this more complicated than it needed to be. He loved Hinata. He didn't know where he'd be without Hinata. Without Hinata, he'd be without a family, without a place he could call home. She'd given him so much. Everything was fine the way it was right now. Hinata was happy. Himawari was happy. Boruto was—well, Naruto was still working on him, but still. He was making progress, and that should be satisfying enough.
A knock.
Himawari.
Must have had a nightmare.
It was with some measure of relief that Naruto carefully extricated himself from Hinata and pulled the blanket over her. Throwing his clothes back on, he padded over to open the door to reveal a teary-eyed Himawari. Immediately melting, he crouched down to her, wiping away her tears.
"Bad dream, Hima?"
Himawari looked at him with her watery blue eyes, her lips quivering. Naruto extended his arms and she jumped on, hugging him tightly. He carried her to her bedroom and crawled into bed with her before letting her lay her head on his lap. "Do you wanna talk about it?"
Himawari shook her head. "Nnh-nn," she mumbled into his lap.
"Okay." Naruto brushed his fingers through her hair. He started humming, and he was beginning to relax when Himawari spoke softly. Naruto had to bend over close to hear her.
"You won't ever leave us, will you, daddy?"
"Huh?" Naruto's eyes widened. "Of course not! Did you dream about me leaving?"
Himawari sniffled. After a second, she started quivering on his lap.
Alarmed, Naruto scooped her into his arms and leaned into her. "I won't ever leave you," he whispered. "You're my precious daughter, aren't you? I love you so, so much. I love you and your brother and your mother so much! There's no way I'd ever do that to you. Okay?"
It took a while, but Himawari eventually calmed down as Naruto kept massaging her. "You okay?"
"Unh." Himawari nodded.
"Okay." Naruto leaned back against the wall, cradling Himawari in his arms and patting her gently. "Daddy loves you so much, okay?"
"Unh."
"Mm." Naruto kissed her forehead.
After a moment, Himawari mumbled out loud, "Tell me…a story?"
Naruto thought for a minute. "…Oh!" He chuckled when a memory popped up. "Have I ever told you about the time Sasuke and I were abused by an ostrich…?"
It did not take long for her to fall back asleep, but Naruto did not feel like leaving her. At least, with his daughter, he did not have that weird feeling. He loved his daughter. It felt simple. Right. He loved holding her and watching her fall asleep, safe in his arms.
It wasn't until his body protested for some much-needed sleep that Naruto tucked Himawari into bed, gave her another kiss, smoothing over her blanket, and went back to Hinata in the master bedroom.
