Disclaimer - I own nothing but the idea and the character of Marsha :: smacks a lawyer over the head with an umbrella:: Ha! See if you can sue me now:: Lawyer hands over a summons for physical abuse:: doh.....
First off all I want to thank Angel of the Fallen Stars for giving me a fantastic idea for another chapter! So after Rolo, we'll have a little Evietro....he, he, he.....Marsha's gonna have a little fun with the speedster. Now should I make it Death By Spatula II, or something entirely different?
Thanks as always to my wonderful reviewers......
Amelia (Your review was so sweet!), Demon Rogue 13, Pyro Lady, Valoofle, Riderazzo (my other fic is a lancitty, read it if you can be bothered/want to), Universal Anime Girl (CPOOPGaP??? I love it!!! Its fun to say...and yes Rogue has traumatised her the most, after all the first is always the worst right?), Angel of the Fallen Stars, Pyro Tsunami and Lancitty 92.
Y'all Rock!
Hope you enjoy the chapter:)
'hakuna matata' = thoughts dude
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Rolo a.k.a Death By Louis VuittonMarsha opened her eyes slowly to see something white hovering above her. She blinked and the image focused into a beautiful, African women with white hair.
She sat up and looked around wearily, she looked like she was in a hospital room of some kind. "Where the freak am I?" she asked the white haired woman, "And who are you?"
"My name is Ororo Munroe, I'm a teacher here at the Xavier Institute. I found you outside unconscious and in a bush." said Storm serenely as she passed Marsha cup of coffee.
Marsha grabbed the cup, took a big swig and sighed blissfully.
"Would you like to tell me what exactly you were doing in one of our bushes?" probed Ororo quietly as she took a seat next to the bed.
Marsha eyed the women wearily, would she see her side of things or just think that she was a pervert?
'She'll think I'm a pervert' thought Marsha decisively.
"My name's Marsha Wainthrope, I'm a relationship counsellor, I was on my way to meet a client and I think I took a wrong turn somewhere. I was trying to find someone to ask for directions but then I must have fainted in your bush."
Ororo raised an enquiring eyebrow. "Haven't had anything to eat all day, makes a girl queasy." rushed Marsha as she took another swig of her coffee nervously
Ororo was about to probe her further when a man walked in, he was on the short side had a certain feral quality to his looks.
"Hey Ro', can I borrow ya for a sec?" he asked in his gruff and manly voice.
"Of course Logan, I'll be right back" Ororo told Marsha as she walked gracefully over to her companion.
Marsha took this opportunity to scrutinise the guy she was talking to. Now that she thought about it he was actually pretty buff. The hair actually worked for his overall look, which she noted happily, involved leather. And he wasn't really that old, he looked about 10? 15? Years old then her. She decided to quit perving and start eavesdropping so she could see if he was taken or not.
Logan was growling something quietly to Ororo "He coming down today, do you think he - "
"Mean's any threat?" Ororo shook her head "Maybe he's just here to have a chat-"
"With Charles, yeah that's what he said." Nodded Logan, "But I was wondering if we should-"
"Set up some security measures anyway?" Ororo finished for him. "I don't think there's any need, I mean all he ever does when he comes over is - "
"Get drunk?" laughed Logan, "You're right, the guy will probably be too wasted to try anything. He a bad influence on -"
"Charles? I know but we might as well enjoy it while it lasts. Before long he'll be making, you me and Hank -"
"Work? Ha! That'll be the day!" said Logan as he headed towards the door. "He'll be here in 20 minutes Ro' don't miss it."
"I won't" said Ororo flirtingly as she walked back over to Marsha who looked heavily disappointed.
"So is that's you're husband?" asked Marsha dejectedly. It was obvious from the way that these guys finished each other sentences that they had been married for absolutely forever.
Ororo looked shocked. "W-whatever gave you that idea?" She stammered
"Err...the complete and never faltering eye contact, the finishing of each others sentences..." said Marsha pointedly
"I don't know what you're..."
"It's obvious you have the hots for the guy!" stated Marsha
"Well I think you're mistaken. Logan is my long-time colleague and friend. Nothing more." said Ororo with a note finality as she sat down again
Marsha leaned over conspiratorially. "He definitely fancies you, you know"
Ororo blushed, "Well that's just silly, Logan would never - really?" asked Ororo interestedly
Marsha nodded as she finished off her coffee. "Oh yeah, definitely. It's was obvious from your conversation that he disturbed you for no reason, he just wanted to talk to you...."
"That was a really pointless conversation." admitted Ororo, "Lord knows Magneto has been coming here for years just to get drunk and go to strip bars with Charl - what were you doing listening in on our conversation?" exclaimed Ororo angrily
"I was bored...oh! And err....erm .... I was just admiring the wonderful relationship you two have!" said Marsha quickly to cover up her blunder.
"That's preposterous! There is no relationship between Logan and me! I have never seen him in that way." replied Ororo steely
"Really? I'd screw him in a heartbeat." said Marsha flippantly.
"I beg your pardon..."
"I mean yeah he's short, but check out those muscles!" continued Marsha oblivious to Ororo's growing rage.
"I really don't think you..."
"Ok, so mutton chops are over but I think he pulls them off. Make's him seem all rugged...."
"I really haven't noticed..." blushed Ororo
".... And that leather! Hoo yeah! Not to mention..."
"Will you please...." began Ororo angrily
"...he's probably an animal in bed! And..."
"DESIST!" raged Ororo loudly. Jerking Marsha out of her soliloquy as Ororo stood to her full height. Lightening flashing in her eyes as well as outside....
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"This is it!" said Evan happily as he eyed the half-pipe skate ramp he had built on the roof of the institute. He snapped on his helmet, put one foot on the board and was about to push off when a bolt of lightning came out of nowhere and destroyed his beloved ramp to cinders.
"Ah man! Not again! Thanks a lot Auntie O!"
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"Uh-oh!" said Marsha fearfully as she watched lighting crackle at the hands of the weather goddess.
"LOGAN IS MY MAN YA HERE ME?" screamed Ororo as she zapped Marsha with a bolt of lightning "NO-ONE TALKS ABOUT HIM THAT WAY EXCEPT ME!"
"But you're not even - OW! Going out with -OW! HIM!" shouted Marsha as she dashed under a table and avoiding a bolt of lightning just thrown by Ororo.
Ororo created a wind as her eyes turned a brilliant white. She sent the wind swirling into the table, causing it to fly straight up leaving Marsha exposed.
"Will you stop if I give you money?" asked Marsha hopefully as Storm flew over to her.
Storm cancelled the wind and floated back down to the ground. "How much money?" she asked interestedly.
Marsha ran over to her bag and tipped the contents upside down. 'Sex toy, sex toy, sex toy, keys, diary, sex toy, cell phone, handcuffs, ah - ha! Wallet!' She grabbed the wallet and emptied out he contents. She did a quick count and then turned around.
"$341 and 62 cents?" said Marsha hopefully
"Hah!" scoffed Ororo, "You are going to have to do better then that! No one talks about my Wolvie poo like that...no-one..." She floated into the air and Marsha checked the rest of her wallet desperately.
"I'll throw in a Starbucks voucher!" cried Marsha as Storm advanced on her
Ororo paused next to Marsha in mid air "I'm more of a tea-girl my self...."
"It's for a free muffin?" added Marsha hopefully
"What kind?" deliberated Ororo
"Chocolate!" said Marsha thrusting the coupon into Ororo's hand.
"Ok!" said Ororo tucking the coupon into her bra nonchalantly along with the money whilst Marsha shoved her things in her bag and ran for the exit.
"Hahaha Sucker!" said Ororo as she flew in front of Marsha and zapped her with another lightning bolt.
"OW! You tryin' to set my ass on fire?" screamed Marsha as she patted at her skirt, which was steaming.
"Yes," said Ororo happily "Yes I am. Thinking you can talk about my Wolvie like that" Ororo's eye twitched horribly, "He's mine." Twitch. "All mine!"
Marsha edged towards the exit slowly while the freaking looney continued to ramble psychotically. She lunged for the door threw it open and dashed outside. She had just reached the stairs when a shoe hit her head, causing her to topple all the way down.
"Ow, ow , ow , ow , ow ,ow ,ow......"
"I knew these heels were multi-purpose!" said Ororo happily before going off to find Logan. She stopped as she just realised she'd thrown one of her $600 Louis Vuitton shoes at Marsha's head.
"Dammit!" muttered Ororo as she conjured a wind to bring back her lost shoe. "By the way, thank you for the free muffin!"
'Damn I really wanted that muffin' Marsha thought desolately from the bottom of the stairs. 'I should really get up.....Nah' was Marsha's last thought before she once again slipped into unconsciousness
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Slap!
Slap!
Slap!
"Ow...." mumbled Marsha. She opened her eyes to see a boy with bleach blonde hair getting ready to slap her again.
"I'm awake!" said Marsha frantically. Evan stopped his hand millimetres away from Marsha's face. "Oh" he said before offering her a hand up.
"Who are you?" They asked each other at the same time
"I asked first!" they said together again
"Stop it!" screamed Evan at the same time as Marsha. Evan took a step away from her and rolled his eyes. "I'm Evan, I live here. What were you doing sleeping at the bottom of our stairs?"
"I got unconscious ok?" snapped Marsha "I'm Marsha and if you don't mind I want to go home."
"There's the door," said Evan indicating the door with his head, "Don't let it hit your sizzling butt on the way out."
"Huh?" Marsha turned her head to see that there was a large burnt patch on the seat of her skirt. "My poor Prada skirt" she mumbled as she extinguished a growing flame with her hand. She straightened her jacket and was about to turn around and leave when a thumping base sound caught her attention.
"Is that 50 cent?" asked Evan in shock as he walked towards the downstairs study, from where it seemed the loud music was blasting. A curious Marsha tagged along.
"OH MY GOD!" shouted Evan as he opened the door to find Magneto and Xavier in only grass skirts and flowers garlands dancing (and wheeling) around like idiots and attempting to do the hula, whisky bottles in hand. Beast was breaking dancing and Wolverine on the other hand was sitting in a chair and making out with Ororo.
"Go! Go! Go! Go shorty!" Logan sang along happily as he took another swig of his beer and went back to frenching his gal.
"AUNTIE O! STOP THAT RIGHT NOW!" screamed Evan in horror before running away. "Never gonna be clean, never gonna be clean, never gonna be clean....."
Logan and Ororo broke away from each other with silly smiles on their faces. Ororo looked at Marsha and her face flushed with anger. "Look that's the woman I was telling you about!"
Wolverine got up slowly, "Don't worry darlin', I got this."
SNICKT
Marsha looked at the claws, took a step out the room and ran for her life. She seriously needed to get out of this freak place.
Wolverine retracted his claws and then kissed his knuckles. "I love these babies! They're scare everyone." He said happily, he walked back over to Ororo and went to pick up his beer. He looked up to see Hank chugging it down.
He growled, and jumped at Hank claws extended. "Give me back my beer!" Hank whimpered and then passed it back before running off to a corner and shaking uncontrollably.
Logan turned back to Ororo. "See what I mean?"
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"Ok so we'll see you guys tomorrow at 12, outside that slut's office." said Kitty as she got out of Lance's jeep followed by Rogue.
"Oh mah gawd." said Rogue slowly
"What's de matter cherie?" enquired Gambit
Rogue simply pointed at the silver sports car lying in their driveway.
"Ok does that woman have a tracker or something? Cos' this is bordering on scary." stated Lance
Gambit just shook his head "I say we get de hell out of here while we can, mes amis"
"Yeah" said Kitty evilly rubbing her hands together, "You guys go home and prepare for tomorrow, me and Rogue are gonna totally have some fun."
Lance looked at his girlfriend. "I fear you," he said simply as Kitty looked pleased with herself.
Rogue eyed the car and produced an axe from nowhere. "Let's see how that hussie likes her precious car when Ah'm done with it."
"De femme's are sexy when dey evil non?" Remy whispered to Lance who nodded appreciatively as he started up the car again.
"Shouldn't we wait f' speedy?" asked Remy as Lance backed out of the Xavier Institute.
"Nah he's busy pranking Evan. He'll probably be gone a while..."
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Pietro grinned as he looked at his masterpiece; he had covered every inch of Evan's precious skateboard with pink bubblegum. Now if only he could find him. He grabbed the board by the wheels and raced off.
"OWWWWWWWWWWW!"
Pietro looked at the person he had just bashed into in his hurry. "Can't you watch where you're...YOU!"
"Oh crud...." said Marsha as Pietro dropped the skateboard, disappeared and re-appeared in an instant.
"You-can-run-now" he said with an evil grin, he held up a spatula and smacked it into his palm menacingly.
"Bad day, Bad day, Bad day..." moaned Marsha as she ran from Pietro and that bloody spatula.
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REVIEW!!!! And tell me what you think as well a suggestions for more couples and evil, evil ideas for the Evietro chapter. Which is basically going to consist of Marsha convincing Pietro he likes Evan and then embarrassing himself horribly..... he he he he yes I know, I'm sick.
Also Rogue and Kitty are going to have a little fun with Marsha flashy car...
Ciao
Soulstress
