Rated PG for violence.
Disclaimer: Marc Brown owns the Arthur characters. I am but his humble unpaid servant.
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Begin Binky fantasy sequence.
Somewhere in the land of Oz, Scarecrow Binky is hiding behind a tree that stands alongside the Yellow Brick Road. He peeks out from behind the tree and gasps when he sees, high in the sky, the words SURRENDER BINKY written in smoke. Slowly and nervously, he tiptoes toward the Yellow Brick Road, stopping briefly to thank the tree that hid him. "Thanks, buddy."
"No problemo, dude," the tree replies.
Scarecrow Binky walks slowly down the Yellow Brick Road, whistling and glancing around for signs of danger. Suddenly he sees a shape lying on the road in front of him. It is Tin Man Buster, battered and groaning in pain; his arms, legs, and ears have been ripped off. Tin Man Buster looks up at Scarecrow Binky and says, "She ripped off my arms and she threw them over there! And she ripped off my legs and she threw them over there! And she ripped off my ears and she threw them over there! And she..."
"Just tell me which way she went," says Scarecrow Binky.
One of Tin Man Buster's arms, which is lying a few feet away, stands up on its own and points toward the west. "That way."
"Don't go anywhere, okay?" Scarecrow Binky advises his fallen friend.
He continues his journey down the Yellow Brick Road, and soon sees a figure off to the side, cowering next to a tree. It is Arthur the Lion, who is muttering to himself, "I do believe in ghosts! I do believe in ghosts! I do believe in ghosts! I do..."
"Hey!" Scarecrow Binky calls to him. "Snap out of it, doofus!"
Arthur the Lion looks at Scarecrow Binky and screams in terror. "A scarecrow! Aaaargh!" He then flees into the forest.
As Scarecrow Binky continues walking, he soon comes to a fork in the road,
and looks undecided. "Which way do I go now? If I only had a brain!"
As he deliberates, he suddenly hears evil laughter in the distance, and looks up in terror. Swooping from the sky in his direction is Prunella the Witch, dressed in a black robe and pointed hat, and riding a broomstick. "Hee hee hee!" cackles the wicked hag. "I'll get you, my ugly!"
Scarecrow Binky flees down the left fork of the road just as Prunella the Witch shoots a bolt of flame from her fingers, scorching the spot where he had stood. As he runs, the witch is close behind him. As he tries to elude her, he sees two Tibble munchkins coming down the road in the opposite direction, pushing a cart full of straw.
"Hey, guys, can you tell me how to get to Elwood City?" he asks the dwarfish little boys.
"That's it, right there!" says the first Tibble munchkin, pointing toward a metropolis of sparkling green towers in the distance.
"I said ELWOOD City!" snaps Scarecrow Binky. "What are you, deaf?"
Suddenly he hears the witch's laughter drawing closer, and looks over his shoulder. He grabs a handful of straw from the munchkins' cart, stuffs it into his mouth, and runs away after a quick "thank you". Before the Tibble munchkins know it, the witch is soaring over their heads. She fires a magical bolt at them, transforming them into frogs.
"I can eat more flies than you can," said the second frog to the first.
Scarecrow Binky is suddenly forced to stop by a large sign in the road which reads, ROAD CLOSED FOR NO PARTICULAR REASON. "Oh, no! A dead end!" He turns around and sees that Prunella the Witch is almost on top of him.
When she sees that her prey is helpless, she stops and hovers on her broom. "Hello, little boy! Would you like some fire to play with? Hee hee hee!" Without another word, she shoots a bolt of flame from her fingers directly at Scarecrow Binky.
"NOOOOO..."
End Binky fantasy sequence.
In the real world, Binky and Prunella are sitting on a bench in Lakewood Elementary. Prunella is rambling on about the events of her day, while Binky listens and looks somewhat bored. "...so I asked the guy why he was wearing a skirt, and he said he was a ballet dancer, and he asked me if I'd ever seen a male ballet dancer before, and I said no, all the ballet dancers I'd ever seen were girls."
"Hmm," Binky grunted.
"So I went to the recital, and the guys were ballet dancing with the girls, and they were all wearing skirts, and it was really cool."
"Ho-hum," Binky yawned.
"I think you'd make a good ballet dancer," says Prunella. "Have you ever tried it?"
"No."
"You should try it. I think you've got the right build for it. Well, I'd love to sit here and listen to you talk, but I need to practice for the spelling bee. It was really nice to see you, Binky."
"Uh-huh."
Prunella stands and walks away, then Binky gets up and walks off in the other direction. Soon he meets up with Francine and Muffy. "Hi, girls," he greets them.
"Hey, Binky," asks Muffy, "what were you and Prunella talking about?"
"We were talking about ball...er, ballistic missiles. Yeah, that's it."
"She seems to like you," Francine remarks. "She's always talking to you."
"Uh, yeah," says Binky a bit nervously. "Like, every chance she gets."
"Weren't you in Mr. Ratburn's class with her last year, Binky?" asks Francine.
"Yeah," the boy muses. "She sat next to me."
"She's a nice girl, but she's a little weird," Muffy comments.
"Why do you say that, Muffy?" inquires Francine.
"It's all that magical stuff she does. You know, fortune-telling, hypnotism..."
"Well, she comes from a line of gypsies. They do that sort of thing."
"They put curses on people, too." Muffy's statement causes Binky to wince.
"You don't believe any of that stuff is real, do you?" asks Francine.
"Of course not," says Muffy haughtily. "I'm much too enlightened to believe in those superstitions."
"What about you, Binky?" asks Francine.
"Me?" Binky doesn't sound too sure of himself. "Ha! If she tried to put a curse on me, it would...uh, what kind of curse are we talking about here?"
"Wait, I've got one." Muffy waves her fingers at Binky. "I curse you, Binky Barnes, that your zipper will open by itself every five minutes!" Francine and Binky laugh.
"Okay, I've got a good one." Francine waves her fingers at Muffy. "I curse you, Muffy Crosswire, that your hair will grow shorter instead of longer, until you are completely bald!"
Binky laughs. "Bald Muffy! I wanna see that!"
"That was unkind, Francine Frensky," says Muffy indignantly.
Francine shrugs. "Hey, it's only a curse. It's not like it's actually gonna happen."
"Well, it's the thought that counts."
Binky, Francine, and Muffy walk through the school exit and down the steps. "There's my limo," says Muffy, pointing toward the curb.
"See you later, Muffy," says Francine, waving. "And remember--hair today, gone tomorrow."
Francine giggles as she and Binky walk in separate directions, and Muffy climbs into her limo. Binky suddenly stops, looks down, and fastens his zipper.
TBC
