Sakura's POV
I moved the Uchiha Massacre date for this fic. Cannon, it's in January. But, to make sense of a dumb timeline I'm too lazy to unwrite, it now happened in November. Please leave the pitchforks at home.
A rare author's note at the end.
Sakura hated that she kept a calendar in her hallway for the first time on a rainy Sunday afternoon. It was late when Sasuke awoke, slowly making his way to the living room. He had been out late with Kakashi, so it was an acceptable time to wake up.
Sakura perked up at his footsteps and waited. Their morning routine had evolved into a level of intimacy that Sakura simply adored. Whoever took the bathroom first waited for the other on the couch. Whoever came out second would gently run their hand over some exposed part of the other, a tea waiting for them on the counter.
Today, for the first time in a week and a half, Sasuke skipped the routine. He didn't even make it to the living room before he paused, the wood floors still for a moment, before the fading creaks signaled his retreat back to the bathroom. The shower turned back on.
Sakura looked up from her papers with a frown. That was…odd. Unless he had forgotten to wash something? Shaking her head, Sakura stood and walked to the hall to see if she had left some underwear or bra hanging on the doorknob of the laundry closet, but found nothing. He wasn't embarrassed then, she thought. Glancing up at the calendar, she-
Sakura closed her eyes. Dammit, she thought to herself. Dammit.
She knew this date. Everyone in the village did. Kami, she had it memorized from the first time she had seen Sasuke so dead in the eyes at the academy on the first anniversary of the Uchiha Massacre. After that first year, she made it her mission to simply be with Sasuke and help him in any way that she could.
When the anniversary passed on a mission with Team 7, Sakura had insisted on wanting to sleep more, forcing Sasuke to take the second and third watch. Normally, he would have scoffed or made fun of her, but she had found a weird confidence in staring him dead in the eye while she asked him to stay up for her shift.
Take it, her eyes had seemed to say. Take it so you can be alone and let it all out.
He had closed his eyes before uttering a short affirmative, then began to take out his bedroll. Sakura had cried for him until she fell asleep.
Sakura breathed in deeply, settling herself. This was the first anniversary that Sakura could really be with Sasuke. That is, if he allowed her to be. She wondered what she could do. After glancing around the room, Sakura smoothed her hands down her dress and decided that comfort food was definitely allowed on sad days such as today.
Sakura worked in the kitchen, cutting up tomatoes and stewing up a soup that she knew Sasuke loved. He'd never admit it outright, but Sakura could tell when he had asked for a third bowl. She sighed to herself and felt the jitters of the day release from her body. It was not her day, it was his. She was a bystander for him to hold on to or let go of, even if all she wanted to do was wrap her arms around him and squeeze all of the sadness out of him. Today was about him.
Today was Sasuke's day to do whatever he wanted.
Sakura sighed, looking over her shoulder. Setting the soup on low to sit for an hour or two, Sakura nearly grabbed the plate of cut tomatoes as a peace offering but froze, apple slices flying behind her eyes as she recalled what bringing gifts to an Uchiha in pain would do. Leaving the plate behind, Sakura tip-toed down the hall, her hands creeping to her cheeks.
She lightly rapped against the bathroom door. "S-Sasuke-kun? I made some lunch?"
No response. Sakura frowned. The shower was still running. Fidgeting restlessly, Sakura knocked a bit harder on the door. "Sasuke-kun, I made lunch!"
"I heard you the first time."
Sakura balked at the dead tone. Closing her eyes briefly, Sakura steeled herself for what could possibly be a very long day of cold shoulders and cold voices. "Alright, I'll put it-"
"I'll be out in a moment." Then, so quiet, almost too low for her to hear, he whispered, "Arigato."
Sakura quickly scampered back down the hall and lit the stove back up on high, adding in the last ingredients. She was stirring it, thumb between her teeth when he finally emerged from the bathroom. His hair was wet, his shirt a bit darker at the shoulders, and he wore black sweatpants. The outfit of a man who had no intention of leaving the house.
He stopped at the entrance to the kitchen, halfway turned toward the couch. Looking down to the side, he asked quietly, "Is that your tomato soup?"
Sakura turned to face the stove so she didn't see her shit eating grin. Comfort food was always the answer. "Mm. It's almost ready! I'll bring you a bowl with some bread."
Sasuke hummed a response before moving to sit at the low table in their breakfast nook. His head hung low, but not nearly as low as it was when he walked out of the bathroom. Sakura quickly grabbed the bread from the oven and ladled two bowls full of soup. Placing them all on a tray, Sakura walked over to the table. Sasuke looked up, but barely.
"Thank you," he said. Not a whisper. But not his full voice.
Better, Sakura thought.
They gave small thanks and began to eat in silence. The rain was light against the windows and roof, but it was steady. Sakura sipped at her soup in thoughtful but watchful silence. Wondering if she needed to call Naruto in for back-up, thinking about what Sasuke must be going through…
Sakura finally gained the courage to look up. Sasuke didn't look sad. He looked…tired. He blinked slowly and his spoon could have moved a bit faster for Sakura's liking, but he looked less…cold. Perhaps the soup truly had done him some good. Sakura leaned forward to ask-
"Today is-"
"I know," Sakura said softly, cutting him off. She smiled sadly at his momentary confusion. "I remembered, so you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."
Sasuke closed his eyes after a moment and nodded.
They ate a few more spoonfuls of the soup. The rain began to let up a bit.
Sakura looked up when she noticed Sasuke looking at her. She waited for him to speak.
"I…like to take walks."
Sakura's spoon paused halfway to her mouth. It lowered to her bowl. "I…like to take walks too, Sasuke-kun."
Sasuke looked out the window, sighing. "I want to talk about it. With you."
But the rain, were the unspoken words between them. Sakura nodded, thinking about what he was trying to say. He had always talked on their walks, initiating them when things got tense. It gave him the peace he needed to eventually speak, she assumed.
Sakura tilted her head. "We could run to the gates and walk in the forest. The trees provide enough canopy to remain reasonably dry as long as it doesn't turn into a downpour."
Sasuke finished his soup before he responded. "You don't mind going out in the rain?"
It warmed Sakura's heart while wracking it with such sadness for the boy in front of her. Today…he looked, acted, and felt like the boy in pain so many years ago. She was desperate to turn him back into the semi-happy, calm and content Sasuke from yesterday.
She gave him a cheeky grin. "Sasuke-kun, have you forgotten that I am a well seasoned kunoichi?"
Sasuke hmph'd, but it was filled with patient humor. Sakura stood and gathered their plates and bowls, loading the tray up and taking it to the sink to clean.
"Leave it," Sasuke muttered, standing. "I'll do them when we get back."
Sakura couldn't help but blush. "O-okay. We can…change. Then, we'll go."
Sasuke nodded, turning back to the living room.
Sakura went off to her room to throw on some leggings, a skirt, and a warmer top. She slid her boots on and waited another minute to give Sasuke privacy. She creaked open her door, dancing on her toes with nerves, and eventually ventured out when there was no tell-tale sign of an Uchiha quickly trying to cover his skin. She found him ready at the door, cloak already adorned and buttoned.
He lifted her cloak, his question evident in his eyes. You sure about this?
So, Sakura made sure her smile filled with love when she said, "Let's get out of this apartment!" She stopped to grab her cloak, but Sasuke beat her to it, placing the black fabric around her shoulders, buttoning it at the neck.
Her breath stalled, but she ignored the minor dip in her stomach and pushed on. Not her day, not her day. They exited quietly and after locking up, they began their dash to the forest. The rain had slowed, but not enough for it to not sting slightly against Sakura's cheeks. Sasuke led the way when they passed the gate, taking Sakura to an area she didn't recognize.
He slowed, coming to a walk when the trees began to grow to obscene heights. Sakura breathed in deeply, her hands on her hips, and surveyed the area. They were out of the rain, but when she glanced up and saw a few middle branches not totally soaked through, she had an idea. "Do you want to walk some more or sit for a while?"
His response was to shoot into the air and sit on one of the thicker branches. Sakura sighed and smiled softly at the ground before jumping up to join him. She sat an arm's length away and folded her hands in her lap. Waves of pain had begun to radiate from the man next to her and Sakura had to force herself to stay put, to not reach out to him. She could feel him shaking the branch.
It seemed to have started the moment they sat down.
"O-kuyami," she whispered, hoping he heard.
The pain fell from him like the rain, but Sakura said no more. She knew he would speak when he had the words he wanted to say. So, she sat there and let her heart ache for him instead. She mourned his losses in the silence, picturing what little she remembered of every member of the Uchiha family. She said a small prayer in remembrance and imagined a weight lifting up off of Sasuke with each moment they spent together, each prayer she uttered.
She spent time with the thoughts of Sasuke's immediate family. Mikoto had been especially kind, from what Sakura remembered. She made Sasuke say hello to her once, the memory warming her chilling toes. She thought of everything Sasuke had mentioned about his father, finding a unique softness in a memory of him picking Sasuke up from school in his police uniform. And of course, Itachi…
Sakura let a single tear fall for Itachi before wiping it quickly. He had been a child…
Sakura closed her eyes and tried to think of the warmest memories of Sasuke and Itachi. Watching them walk together in the market. Catching Sasuke's rare grin when he spotted Itachi on patrol. Small moments she treasured as a girl became anchors for her pain. When she ran out of memories, she began to imagine things. Itachi teaching Sasuke how to throw a shuriken. Itachi holding a tiny, bundled Sasuke. Sasuke trailing after his big brother, desperate to play with him.
A few birds chirped.
The leaves rustled in the light wind.
The sun never shone.
Raindrops fell, here and there past them.
It was silence. But what Sakura didn't know, was that it was everything for the Uchiha.
An hour passed before Sasuke spoke.
"Do you know the truth about Itachi?"
Sakura quickly nodded, blinking away the haze in her eyes and clearing her throat. "I- yes, I do." She wanted to say more, like how sorry she was that it had happened the way it did, but this was Sasuke's time to speak.
So it began.
"Today has been…hard for me, for many years." He swallowed. "It only got worse after knowing the truth about the elders. When it happened, when I found out…it was traumatic, in every sense of the word." His eyes met hers briefly. "It awakened my mangekyou sharingan."
They both sat with this information for a while.
"Before that, my reality was that the older brother I idolized had murdered my entire clan, supposedly in cold blood, I-" His hands clenched in the wood. "It shattered a part of me. What I thought I needed was to kill him. That alone would avenge my clan. And, in order to cope with the loss, I filled the gaping holes with rage. The rage was what became my purpose to breathe."
Sakura imagined how hard it must have been to live his whole life for revenge, only to be told otherwise. It must have been incredibly confusing for him to be told different lies all his life. And, for the truth to be revealed only after his brother's death. It was tragic and painful and unbearably sad. Sorrow felt like it was being sewn into her bones.
She held it in. Not a tear fell.
Sasuke looked lost in his head. "I was a happy kid before. I loved to play and train with my brother and cook with my mother. I had a friend named Satu who lived down the street from me." He took a deep breath, the exhale rattling through him. "I knew what love was. I understood what it looked like and what it felt like. Warmth from my mother. Praise from my father. Itachi's…just Itachi.
But when Itachi did what he did…my entire blueprint for emotion was wiped clean and replaced with the ability to only feel few. Uchiha are known for their strong emotions and I felt them in agony. I was so angry and, through that anger, came pain. I thought of pain as a tool to make me stronger, more powerful. I made myself believe that I could withstand any amount of pain to get even a little bit more powerful."
Sakura's hands twitched, wanting desperately to reach out to him but also wishing not to scare him off.
Sasuke turned towards Sakura ever so slightly. "Itachi did a lot of bad things, but all in the name of his love for me. It wasn't right but he…he wasn't suited for violence. He hated it. So he did what he could, even if it was the wrong choice." He sighed so deeply, Sakura felt her own chest tug up and down with his own.
He spoke slowly at first, then crouched to a whisper. "Itachi didn't know what he was doing when he told me he never loved me. He crushed me not only for killing my family, but for destroying the adoration I held in my heart for him my entire life." He closed his eyes. "When I was a baby, I would cry if anyone held me but Itachi. When I was a toddler, I followed him all around the house. When he left, I cried until he came home."
Sakura held on to every word, her heart cracking into pieces.
Sasuke's voice was hollow. "I loved my older brother. He was my idol, my best friend, my confidant, and the person I looked up to the most. I…" He paused, as if the pain was fresh and new, which Sakura knew it sometimes felt as if it was. "I loved him. But the love I had for Itachi was stained and then shredded to hatred. Where he thought that hatred would develop a strong love for the village and a wish to protect the people of Konoha from Itachi, it merely blinded me to all else but my thirst for revenge."
When he looked up again, he looked…apologetic? "Love became the strongest emotion that I had to battle with every day since Itachi killed my clan. I had to fight it every morning when I woke up and missed him or accidentally wondered what he was doing that day. I pushed it so far down that it disappeared entirely. The only emotions I felt towards him were anger and pain. My mother…my father…I held fondness, but too much pain was in the way to fully feel any warmth from the memories. Love eventually became an irrelevant emotion. I didn't need it like I needed power."
Sakura slowly closed her eyes and pushed down the aching slash of pain that reached across her chest at his words, at his possible insinuation. However, when she looked up, Sasuke was looking down at where her hands rested on her lap, a small smile playing against his lips. "But I was wrong. Even in the midst of all that, the people who taught me how to feel again were you and Naruto."
Sakura couldn't help but gasp, her eyes widening. Sasuke's small smile got a tiny bit bigger. "As much as I tried to rebel against it, you both taught me different lessons along the way. Kakashi, too. It was…imperceptible changes. But they came out in strange ways."
Her mind was racing a million miles an hour. She couldn't stop herself from blurting out, "How so?"
Silence. Then, "I tried not to kill for the most part." The words were not quite sure. "My only goal was to kill Itachi and if someone got in the way, I just wanted them to move. It was a narrow mindset that I think was a subconscious desire to keep a part of me away from Itachi's stain."
They sat with that information for a while.
"I also imagined your reaction to things, towards the end," Sasuke admitted quietly. Sakura's face swung to meet his. He continued like she hadn't moved. "I imagined your reactions to ridiculous shinobi, like how you always got mad at Naruto. I thought about what you would say when I didn't take enough time to rest and eat. I wondered what you were doing at the village. It was always right before I fell asleep." His voice was so quiet, Sakura had to lean in to hear his next words. "I played every scenario in my head. You left the shinobi world. You moved somewhere else to train. You had started dating Naruto. You had moved on from wanting me home."
Her heart stopped.
He looked in her eyes at that moment. "Never, ever did I imagine a scenario where you still cared for me. Where you forgave me. I was so lost in pain, I didn't remember the promising you kept making me. I knew the dobe would still want me around because the pain I caused him was so much different than the pain I caused you. I hurt you. So, I disregarded your feelings."
Sakura knew she had tears running down her face at this point, but the conversation had shifted. To them. This was the most he had ever offered her and she was drowning in it. Drowning in him, in his words, his eyes, with no desire to tread water.
He didn't look at her. "It was why I had to say no to your request to join me after the war. I had walked with those who loved me for so long and was blind to what it meant. I knew only in solitude that I could dive deeper into the actions of those who cared for me. I needed time to sift through the memories with a new perspective. In a way, I relived many moments in my life through the eyes of others."
"I don't…understand." Sakura winced. "I'm sorry, I know you've shared so much, but could you explain that?"
Sasuke looked at the remnant of his arm. "I could see Naruto's thoughts and past while we had lain dying in the Valley of the End." He pressed on, despite Sakura's flinch. "I saw his pain and how it was so close to mine. They had the same hollow feelings at their core but…" He struggled to find the words for a moment. "Naruto always had a brightness to him. He believed in himself when everyone else didn't. He had a sense of identity that I didn't understand until I felt it."
Sasuke looked sad, but wise. "The Valley of the End was a crucible, an epiphany, and a discovery all in one. It was where I began to reforge myself with pieces of how Naruto saw me."
"And…how did he see you?" Sakura's voice was thick with emotion.
"By his side. As a shinobi of the leaf."
Sakura beamed. "Of course he did! You were always his friend, Sasuke-kun. He was angry with you, but I think he was angrier about his inability to help you."
"I know." Sasuke sighed. "He was relentless. But, after our last fight, when I could see myself through his eyes, I knew I had to try and do it from everyone else's perspectives too." His eyes finally settled on hers and the intensity behind them startled her. "I needed to spend time in your perspective. You had already told me so many things, I just hadn't been aware enough to understand them."
He took a deep breath and began to admit something that shocked Sakura. "I relived memories I had recorded with my sharingan. Of…you. What you said. What you didn't say but began to understand after paying close attention to your…"
"My what," Sakura whispered.
"Your eyes," he whispered back, finally looking up at her.
They took that moment to simply take in one another. Mismatched eyes watched her with a shy and blooming openness. Green stared in awe. Sasuke thought Sakura's eyes looked like liquid pools of green, shimmering in the rising moon. Nearly the same green as her healing chakra. Sakura thought his were the most beautiful she had ever seen. She felt as if she could swirl right into the purple and black, willing to disappear forever.
It occurred to her that he must have spent hours, days thinking about her on his travels. It filled her with immeasurable joy, but she tried to remain steady, fighting a blush. "What did you learn?"
He slowly turned to face her fully, but he returned his eyes on his hand, resting against his leg. He took a deep breath and rushed out, "I know that your love for me as kids and your love for me now are similar, but different. I know that you love me and will forgive me for the things that I will do. The logic in that is…sound."
He looked up, but stared at her hair, her nose, her chin. "I can expect things from you. You are…reliable, in ways that no one else is. Your ability to understand my ridiculous inability to speak…" Sakura couldn't help but smile. "All at the same time, you still surprise me with your patience."
Sakura chuckled and turned to face him fully. "You're easy," she teased. "Just give you tomatoes and go for a walk!"
Sasuke's smirk was small, but it was a victory for Sakura all the same. He looked up and his smirk transformed into one of his rare, small smiles. It was a sated smile, where he was satisfied and happy, with no other emotions to cloud it. It wasn't perfect, but it was there. Victory bells continued ringing in Sakura's ears.
Slowly, Sakura placed her hand over his. Sasuke started, but he didn't move. She squeezed his hand once and tried to let go, but Sasuke's hand had flipped to grasp her's tightly. Sakura sucked in a breath and held still, wondering if she was about to be admonished or pulled closer.
"Sakura…"
She got nothing from his tone or expression. But the way he whispered her name…
Sasuke's head suddenly tipped forward until his forehead rested against her own. He let go of her hand and slowly, like he was trying to pick a spot, placed his hand on Sakura's middle back and pushed.
Sakura was scooted closer until she was smooshed against Sasuke, his arm wrapped around her. He was crushing her to him, but she would let him break her spine before she let him know that. Her hands slowly wound themselves underneath his and tentatively rested against his back.
Sasuke sighed into her hair, stirring the strands at her neck, before leaning back. Sakura moved to sit up straight, but was stopped by the firm press of Sasuke's hand still at her lower back. She looked up only to be nearly nose to nose with the man she had loved since she was a kid. Her eyes widened and her blush finally won, taking over her cheeks and forehead.
Sasuke watched it bloom, a small smile on his lips. "Mm," he said, pulling Sakura close enough to place his lips on her heated cheek. They burned even worse "So annoying."
Sakura grumbled, unthinking, "I feel like everytime you call me annoying, you're saying something completely different."
Sasuke looked stunned at her words, but only for a moment. Wide eyes, a frozen figure. He wiped his face of emotion in a second and looked down at the ground, his eyebrows furrowed.
Sakura felt like melting away. She hadn't expected that reaction and felt horrible for causing whatever emotion he had to deal with on top of the pain and sorrow of the day. And he had leaned back, his hand now ghosting her back. "Sasuke-kun, I didn't mean anything by-"
"You're right."
Sakura's mouth was still open. She quickly shut it and stuttered out, "W-what?"
Sasuke took a while to formulate a response. His mouth opened a few times, but shut soon after.
"You don't have to tell me," Sakura said quietly. She leaned forward a bit. Sasuke grumbled under his breath and Sakura couldn't help but smile. "Seriously, you don't have to-"
"It's the same as when I poke your forehead."
And that…explained nothing. Sure, Sakura had ideas about what it could mean. Next time, he would say, or some variation thereof. She had never understood it as anything more than a promise: You mean something to me.
But…could it mean something else?
Sakura felt here eyes drawn to his. His eyes were searching, yielding, swirling. Sakura blushed, just as she always did under this kind of look. Filled with…something. It ran a shiver down her spine, but she pushed the new emotions down. When she saw him look at her like this…she never hoped. She never guessed. She had decided whatever it was, it was enough. But it was okay that it would never be what she desperately wanted.
But what if?
Sakura bit her lip. Sasuke's eyes flicked down and up. She bit her lip harder.
"Sakura…?"
She closed her eyes. She hated how much his saying her name made her want to kiss him. She had been dying, desperate to drive out those kinds of feelings. Loving him came with everything and she was desperate for touch. After all, all she wanted was to kiss him, just once. But she was unwilling to push, unwilling to break. She would be steadfast as the stars in her quest to simply become home to him in the way he needed, not in the way she wanted.
"Sakura." His tone was more demanding.
She opened her eyes. Her mouth opened. Closed. Once more. She made a noise of frustration. She couldn't ask. She couldn't. She couldn't. She couldn't.
But with that look in his eye, concerned, wanting to know her thoughts…
She could.
"I don't know exactly what the forehead poke means," she said slowly. Sasuke's eyes widened in surprise. She pushed on. "But I feel like…like it's a promise. To come back. To come…home. To me."
Her voice was so quiet when she finished, she was almost unsure if he heard her. But, with how his expression had softened in understanding, only in a way that Sakura would notice, she knew he was with her.
"It is that," Sasuke said, his voice quiet, a bit unsure. "But it also means something…more."
Sakura blinked.
Sasuke looked back at the ground when he spoke, a small, nearly undetectable blush on his cheeks. "Itachi would tap my forehead and tell me he would do whatever I asked, but the next time. It was his way of showing me…he loved me."
Sakura nearly fell off of the tree.
Her heart bloomed. Dormant was the hope she had for them, but now it roared, rose like a wave, and toppled all of her worries to the side. Nothing else mattered. He could never say the words, but she knew. She knew.
He loved her.
He loved her.
He loved her.
Sakura's eyes began to well with tears. Sasuke made a noise of disapproval yet tugged her closer, his vocalization in direct contrast to his actions. She clutched at his cloak and let out a choked sob, overwhelmed and so in love with the man who held her that it hurt.
"Sakura." His tone wasn't angry. It wasn't filled with pain. It wasn't cold. It wasn't impatient or unkind. He sighed her name. Like it was a word he had finally remembered and was able to say aloud.
Sakura squeezed her eyes shut and clenched her hands tighter. She knew she was shaking, but the shock, the revelation, never really knowing…it was all too much and all at once.
Sasuke, apparently, wasn't having it. His fingers grazed her cheek almost cautiously, like he didn't know what to do. He pressed them firmer against her skin and slid them down to her chin, pulling her face from his chest and up.
Sakura knew she looked a mess, but she didn't care. She smiled, so full of love and happiness, despite the tears still trailing down her cheeks. Sasuke's eyes softened even further, his lips pressed together in a thin line.
"Please don't cry," he whispered. As if moving through molasses, his fingers swept across her cheek, pushing her hair back. He held her face with a softness that Sakura had never imagined in her wildest dream. He touched her with love.
"I'm sorry," she whispered, wiping at her face. Sasuke's hand fell and she felt cold without it. She couldn't help her hands from shooting out to grab it, holding it inches from her face. "I…I just never knew. I didn't let myself…you as you are is always enough. But I…"
She didn't know how to explain it. She didn't want to hurt him by acknowledging that she had accepted he would never love her like she loved him. And maybe he didn't. But when his hand returned to her cheek, his thumb caressing her skin, she wondered why she had ever doubted it. It was so obvious now.
It was all in his eyes.
Once again, unable to help herself, Sakura touched him. This time, it was her hands slipping around his waist to rest on his back. Sasuke didn't hesitate to fall into the embrace, his chin resting against her temple, his hand sliding to the back of her head. They swayed slightly, both of them overwhelmed with emotion. The feelings they felt for one another were tangible in the air, their heartbeats melding as one, beating against the other's chest. There was nervous, elated, and sated energy, all moving together in harmony.
"I love you," Sakura whispered, squeezing him once, all she would allow herself.
She pulled back, but Sasuke didn't let her get far. He held her close enough for his head to fall to meet hers, his breath warm against her nose. Sakura's eyelids fluttered and she felt like she was about to take flight.
Sasuke's hand slid and tightened against the back of her neck. His eyes were closed, but she could feel his indecision, his nerves. In her joy, she had forgotten that Sasuke wasn't ready for a relationship like she was. Silently admonishing herself, Sakura began to pull back.
Sasuke's hand tightened, freezing her in place. Sakura gasped and immediately blushed, her eyes clenching shut.
When he didn't do or say anything, Sakura peeked her eyes open. Sasuke was looking at her, a decision obviously made. She hoped and dreaded she knew what he decided. When he swallowed, his eyes flicking down to her mouth, she knew what he wanted to do.
She was melting.
Slowly, as if testing the waters, making sure they were both okay, they were sure, they leaned in. Sakura watched his eyelids slide shut and closed her own just before their lips touched.
It was soft, testing. Neither of them moved, not really. Her bottom lip was between his and he pulled on it, just a bit.
Sakura felt warmer than she had all day.
It wasn't quick, but it wasn't long. They parted, but stayed close, heads still together. Sakura opened her eyes to find Sasuke's still closed, his lips slightly parted. He was flushed, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration, his breaths deep and slow. Without black and purple, it was his nose, his skin, his mouth Sakura found herself devouring him with her eyes.
They sat wound together for a while, breathing the same air, relishing in the other's proximity. Sakura nearly glowed with happiness and Sasuke looked like a weight had been lifted from him. They held each other for the first time in intimacy that wasn't kept in the dark, pushed down deep within them, or left on a bench leaving the village.
They stayed until the rain started to come down hard enough for it to leave fat, wet splotches on their cloaks. Without needing words and using only a look, the two jumped to the ground and took off back to the village.
Their evening was filled with reheated soup, reading, and heated, loving stares. Their evening routine stayed the same, but the looks they shared, the tiny brushes of skin and fabric, all of it meant so much more. Especially since Sakura hadn't noticed that Sasuke kept his eyes closed for so long as to not reveal his activated sharingan.
I loved writing this chapter, as sad as it was. I hope that the communication with their eyes has been developed enough to not be overtly obvious, but subtle enough to give you an 'aha'. I try to write those. Sasuke speaking for Sakura at dinner with Naruto was one of my favorites- her nervous tell is tucking her hair behind her ear. Sasuke taking walks is one of my favorite things about him and creates a path for his journeys later in life. I just love them :)
