In this story someone has been dumb enough to give Kenshin and crew a spaceship. Now they are sailing around the galaxy tazing and exploding people instead of stabbing them.
Disclaimer: The day I own Rurouni Kenshin and Soul Caliber is the day Shaq becomes the tooth fairy.
"Welcome to starship Oro," Kenshin said ominously. "Your apprentice training begins today, Yahiko"
"Great. What are we going to do?" Yahiko quipped. The crew had been refueling on the planet of Glyzscrthen, the Planet of Many Consonants, when he had tried to pickpocket them. The man before him, with his strange purple eyes and red ponytail, had quickly apprehended Yahiko, and, liking his spirit, offered him an apprenticeship on the starship.
"Well, first we have to get you some proper clothing," Kenshin lectured, staring at Yahiko's tattered, once white shirt. Kenshin was dressed in a metallic silver space suit with the symbol that they have star trek suits, but it was crossed out. Instead it said S.O. Yahiko surmised that they were tight for funds. His long sleeves came down to his wrists, and the legs went down a little past his knees where they were met by shiny black boots, buckled tightly to his feet. A gun holster was slung around his waist. His flaming ponytail stuck out the back of his suit.
They walked down the slick metal corridor in silence, their footsteps echoing down the polished halls. They came to a heavy door that slid open at a swipe of Kenshin's ID card.
Inside, they found rows of metallic space uniforms hanging neatly on racks. Sano was sitting in the middle of the room in his underwear (briefs, not boxers). He had a pair of safety scissors and was cutting a jagged hole in the top of one of his spacesuits.
"That's Sanosuke Sagara, one of our gunners. He's been depressed ever since we first got these uniforms," Kenshin whispered to Yahiko. "Because they flatten down all your hair, he came out of the dressing room two feet shorter. Kaoru nearly wet her pants laughing. Now he cuts holes in the top so his hair can fit through and he looks tall again."
Yahiko bit his lip, trying not to laugh.
As they walked past Sano Kenshin remarked, "Why are you using the safety scissors, Sano?"
"The Fox Lady took the sharp ones away after I threw them at her head."
"Oh," Kenshin said nonchalantly, as though that were a perfectly normal occurrence. Yahiko began to get a little scared.
Sanosuke, having finished cutting his hole, looked up at them. "You guys best scram, I'm gonna get back at the Fox Lady by cutting holes in her suits where her boobs go, and I don't want anyone to know what I'm doing."
"Then why did you just tell us?" Yahiko wondered.
"Uhhhh…You're really annoying, you know that kid?"
"You are hopeless Sano, that you are. Let's go get you a uniform, Yahiko."
Kenshin led Yahiko to one of the back racks, where they found Yahiko a uniform that was his size.
They walked down the hall, both looking cool in their chrome suits with classy gun holsters. Kenshin's gun was huge, with all sorts of gauges and pipes and pointy things. The overall effect was to make you think that this thing could destroy a building in one shot. Yahiko, however, in the spirit of true apprentices, had a wooden gun. He was quite worked up about it, when he was in his street gang they trusted him with all sorts of weapons! He was no child. He was not even listening as Kenshin gave him the grand tour.
"...And this," Kenshin was saying. "Is the navigation/control room. These guys make sure that we approach something disastrous at least once a show so that we can have a plot. Let's go inside, shall we?"
Meanwhile inside the control room
The room was set up with a large projector in the middle showing a 3D model of the ship. It was a nice blue color, cruising along unobstructed. Opposite the main entrance was a large window looking out into the void of space. There were smaller screens below and around it, showing readouts of numbers and coordinates indecipherable to those untrained. Those who were trained knew that they were really the latest AstroBall players' statistics.
A dark haired woman was debating a white bearded man on the finer points of the sport, including the fact that the necessity of having a player with a good PPG average did not overshadow the need for a good player to backup the two Linerunners, something her counter part disagreed with feverently.
A few young men had their guns et to stun and they were going at one another, hiding behind chairs and equipment to fire off quick red darts at one another, scorching the walls.
A short, spry woman who seemed to have just began growing into herself was sitting on the edge of a chair containing a solemn, ice eyed man. He was the only one who was watching the readouts with any sort of dedication to his work.
"Hate to break up this love fest," interrupted the solemn man observing the video feed. "But we have a code 237-B! Quick, everybody, look like you're working! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!"
In less than 5 seconds, the all traces of gaming had vanished, including the scorches on the wall and everyone was sitting at their stations. They had obviously drilled this several times.
Kenshin and Yahiko walked in. "How goes the work?" asked Kenshin
"Good! We're doing a scan for any black holes in the vacinity." reported Misao, no longer on Aoshi's chair.
"Excellent! Those always make for a great plot line!"
"Alright, we've seen enough," Kenshin declared. "Lets go meet the weapons master!"
I won't bore you with a desperate plea for reviews, but I would appreciate them
Damn, I've always been such a hypocrite.
