A/N: Well, here's chapter 5 and let me say, it took me a friggin long time to write it. Still no reviews or readers... quite depressing, really. Anyways, most of these chapters are going to be from Harry's POV... and kind of not. I'm writing it in 2nd person, so it's following Harry and his thoughts without it being "I" and "My" format. Um... review please? I have a feeling no one likes my story and that kind of sucks.
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Harry Potter characters, nor the songs "Volcano" by Damien Rice and "The Horses" by Kenny Loggins.
Chapter 5: Mission
The days had only gotten hotter as the summer wore on, and from what Harry could hear on the news, it was much worse than the previous summer. It was hot and sticky outside, and Harry could feel the sweat running down his back and sticking to the back of his shirt. But it really didn't matter to him anymore; nothing really mattered, now that had lost Sirius. If I had tried harder in Occlumency... If I hadn't have been so stupid, Sirius would still be alive, he thought for the thousandth time that summer. If Dumbledore... In fury, he kicked his bed and stumbled, now with an aching toe. It was so frustrating, especially since he was still being kept in the dark by the Order.
"Boy! Get down here!" He heard his uncle call. Sighing, Harry stood up and headed out of his room, slamming the door shut behind him. He walked down the stairs slowly only to come face to face with his uncle. "When are those... those people coming to get you?" He asked, almost excitedly. Harry rubbed his forehead and closed his eyes.
"Sometime soon, that's all I know." He said softly. Uncle Vernon rolled his eyes and turned away.
"All I need is a straight answer." He said while walking away. "Damn, we're never getting rid of you..." He was mumbling to himself now, and Harry, rolling his eyes, turned and walked out of the house. Walking down the street, he came across the same park bench from the first time he ever saw Sirius. His eyes watered and he pushed the tears away, sniffling. Why did he have to die? ...That was the question that had haunted him all summer. Why? Why did anyone have to die, though? Why did his parents have to die? Everything he'd ever had or ever wanted had been ripped from him. It was like watching someone tear out his heart and slowly break it apart.
It wasn't fair, it just wasn't fair, and the only person Harry could blame (other than himself) was Albus Dumbledore. Yes, if Dumbledore had told him about the prophecy, Sirius would still be alive. If Dumbledore had kept him informed rather than push him away, Harry would not be mourning Sirius' death. But did Harry's pain really matter to anyone but himself? It couldn't possibly; the rest of the world either looked at him as a deranged lunatic or the savior, their only way of survival. Everything rested on Harry; everyone's lives rested upon his shoulders. Every muggle, every witch and wizard, every bloody creature on this damned earth had their lives unknowingly placed in Harry's hands, and the more he thought about it, the more Harry just wanted to kill himself right then and there. No one bothered to help him with his pain, no one bothered to write and apologize, to ask him how he was doing, to even act as though they were friends of his. Maybe they were worried that he just wanted alone time, which Harry didn't deny that he liked.
Sighing, Harry sat down on the bench and just sprawled out on it, feeling very lonely. No one would have guessed that it was his birthday, his sixteenth birthday, no less. Slowly, Harry began to drift off into sleep...
"Harry! Wake up!" He heard a familiar, gruff voice say. Someone was shaking him roughly and slowly, and he opened his eyes. It took him a moment for his eyes to focus, but when they did, he looked up to the smiling face of Hagrid.
"Hagrid, how are you?" Harry asked tiredly.
"Jus' fine, Harry, jus' fine." Hagrid clapped him on the back. "Come on, Harry, we've got ourselves a mission from the Order!" Harry shook his head dazedly.
"What?"
"A mission! Come on, we've got ter' go!" Hagrid grabbed Harry and pulled him off his feet.
"Will I need to pack anything, Hagrid?"
"No, we'll be going there every other day, just to check up on 'er." Harry was nearly jogging to keep up with Hagrid's large strides.
"Her?" Hagrid nodded. "Her who?"
"Can' say it here, Harry. I'll tell you when we get there." Hagrid stopped suddenly and looked around the street. "Where is it... where is it..."
"Where's what?"
"Portkey, need to find it... Ah, there it is. Take a hold of it now, Harry." It was a crumpled up, old flier bearing the words "Psychology Club Meeting at Number 8 Fawcett Drive on Friday the 8th at 6:00." Harry laughed a little and picked it up with Hagrid. "3...2...1... here we go!"
Harry felt the familiar jerk and was pulled forward into the howling wind and color...
He landed with a thud in the middle of a forest. "Hagrid, where are we?"
"America, in Scottsdale."
"America?" Harry was shocked. "What could possibly be in America?"
"Her." Hagrid grunted, and pointed ahead of them. Harry looked up and nearly gasped. A girl was sitting on the edge of a cliff and just staring at the slowly sinking sun, playing her guitar.
"Don't hold yourself like that, 'cause you'll hurt your knees. Well I kissed your mouth and back; that's all I need. Don't build your world around; volcanoes melt you down. What I am to you is not real. What I am to you, you do not need. And what I am to you is not what you mean to me; you give me miles and miles of mountains and I ask for the sea..." She sang to herself.
"She's really good." Harry breathed. "What's her name?"
"Willow."
"Why is she important?" Harry had said that last bit too loudly and she stopped. Setting her guitar down, she turned her magnificent body around and stood up. Long black hair framed a pale white face with large rose-red lips and large, bright green eyes. Her nose was bold, but it fit her well. She was very thin, too thin, perhaps, but still with plenty of curves. Harry couldn't help but noticed how developed she was in... some places, and how he would be taller than her by a head and a half, were they standing side by side. Though he had grown a lot, it still gave him a jittery feeling in the pit of his stomach at the thought of being taller than quite a few others.
"Is someone there?" She called hesitantly. Her voice shook slightly, but it was a cold, distant voice. There was no love or warmth in her eyes or face. Harry and Hagrid remained silent. Harry suppressed the urge to laugh—her accent was hilarious! Willow shrugged and sat back down, watching the end of the magnificent sunset.
"Look at that sunset, Hagrid! It's fantastic!" Hagrid smiled.
"Right you are, Harry, right you are..."
"So... why is she important?" Hagrid took a deep breath and spoke quietly to me.
"Willow En Daelin—her over there—was born ter Devin and Moira Daelin on the 4th of August, 16 years ago. Devin Daelin had been a werewolf—known only to the Ministry of Magic and himself, a'course—for many years before his daughter was born. It was only jus' before the wedding of Moira and Devin that he told his beloved bride-to-be what he was. Moira, bein' a very sweet and unprejudiced witch (not ter mention head over heals in love) didn' care and married him anyways. And so, when their first daughter was born, they knew that they had to be careful, especially at the time of the full moon. So they moved ter' the near top of the mountain next to the town of Scottsdale so that Devin wouldn't hurt anyone. Every full moon, Moira would help Devin lock himself up to a tree, and there he would be until moonset. As the years went by, the two remained in love, and everyone remained unhurt. But one night, a few weeks after Willow had turned 5 years old, Devin broke free from his prison and came across little Willow laying outside, watching the stars. Devin had only just turned into a werewolf, and Willow had seen 'im only moments before as her daddy. She watched 'im turn into a monster and screamed when he came chasin' 'er. So she ran into this forest and hid for many days, until she was sure her daddy wasn' mad at her no more. After that, Devin decided that he was much to dangerous to be around his precious daughter, so he found some very old, very powerful, ancient magic, and drained his daughter of her magical powers, as well as her being a half-werewolf! But now, the Death Eaters are after 'im and he begged Dumbledore to keep an eye on his little girl. He told Dumbledore that one day, very soon, he was going to release her powers back to 'er. She'll be very weak when he gives 'em back to 'er, and she'll be in a lot o' pain. Her dad'll die righ' afterwards."
"Okay... so she's half werewolf. What else makes her important?"
"Blimey, Harry! Her father asked Dumbledore to watch 'er and that's what we'll do! Not on'y that, but you-know-who is going ter be after her as payback for her father. We can' let that happen, Harry, we jus' can'."
"Anything else?"
"Well, except for the fact that she's half werewolf and you-know-who's after her an' all, I don't know."
"What's so special about being half werewolf?"
"Nuthin, Harry. It's a horrible life; you never really know what you are. They're really rare; you won't find many people keen on marrying a werewolf. And because the molecules of the werewolf aren't complete, it changes the properties of their body. They become awfully paranoid, Harry. Think the whole world is out ter get 'em. It's awful sad, it really is, Harry. They also tend to become the opposite of a regular wolf, or even a werewolf. Love bein' alone. Two's a crowd for a half wolf. They aren't afraid of humans when they're in their wolf form, and they'll attack if they want to. They also have an... undying? No... unquenchable, tha's it, thirst for blood; they call it bloodlust. Half wolves can change into a wolf at will at any point in time. Doesn't have to be a full moon for 'em ter do it, Harry. But if they change once, they have to change at least twice a month, every month, otherwise they die. And in their wolf forms, they have to hunt down somethin', doesn' matter what, so long as they do. Then, they have ter devour it and drink in all of the animal's blood. It's a bit sick, Harry; it's a horrible way ter live. They could kill anythin', their best friend even, and they wouldn' know it till mornin' when they woke up beside the body. They have no idea what they're doin' in their wolf form. They say it gets better as time goes on, that they start havin' control, but it's doubtful. I might be missin' other things, but I dunno."
"Could... could Voldemort—stop Hagrid, you'd better start saying his name too—use Willow?"
"When she's a wolf?" Harry nodded. "It's very possible, Harry, he rightly well could. Good at manipulation, that one. Plus, I think the Imperius Curse'd help a bit; wouldn't need to waste any time convincing or manipulating with that one. Of course, it'd take a bit of time a'fore he could actually use her, even under the Imperius Curse. It'd take 'er a bit o' time to control 'er powers. Maybe he'd control her in 'er sleep. In their human form, they're very deep sleepers. He could probably make 'er change whenever he wanted to. Poor thing..." Harry sat in thought as he watched the girl slowly stand up and stare at the sunset, her hair blowing in the wind. God, she's beautiful.
"It isn't fair." Harry said quietly. "She should be allowed to live a free and happy life; she shouldn't have to worry about being a half werewolf or about Voldemort or anything."
"None of us should, Harry. None of us should."
"She's so beautiful." He whispered wistfully. The girl turned to face their direction, and laughing, she fell down and stared at the stars, still giggling. "She shouldn't be alone all the time."
"That's what she wants though, Harry. That's what she wants."
"No, that's what the wolf inside of her wants. She's really just a regular girl; everyone wants to have someone." He stared at her as she pulled out her guitar again.
"Alright, what shall I play now?" She asked herself. "Hm... how about... 'Love' by Kenny Loggins?" She stared off into space for a while, and slowly smiled. "Yes... I feel I need an explanation on what love is, especially since Mother thinks otherwise... 'Love is wanting to be with that person, Willow!'" She complained. "Honestly... I love her, but it's not like I want to be with her all the time... 'You sit alone all the time, Willow! It scares me!' It scares her? Being alone? God..." Willow sat there muttering to herself for a few minutes before she changed her mind. "I'd rather play 'The Horses' by Kenny right now. Not in the mood for 'Love'..."
"We will fly way up high
Where the cool winds blow
Or in the sun laughing having fun
With all the people that we know
If the situation should keep us separated
I know the world won't fall apart
You will free the beautiful bird
Caught inside your heart
Can you see her oh she flies so proud
Cast her wild wings over water and cloud
That's the way it's gonna be little darling
You'll go riding on the horses
Way up to the sky little darling
If you fall I'll pick you up, pick you up
You will grow until you go
I'll be right there by your side
And even then a whisper the wind
And she will carry up your life
I hear all the people of the world
In my one bird's lonely cry
I see them trying every way they know how
To make their spirits fly
Can you see her moonlight in her eye
Coming from under my wing
You were born to fly
That's the way it's gonna be, little darling
You'll go riding on the horses
Way up to the sky little darling
If you fall I'll pick you up, pick you up"
Harry listened to the girl's beautiful voice and perfect guitar playing and started crying silently. The song was so... meaningful. It was something he wished someone would sing to him. It was times like these when Harry truly missed his parents and... Sirius. Harry rarely ever cried, except when thinking about Sirius. Every once in a while, when he was feeling extremely emotional, he cried about his parents, wondering how two people could love a child so much, a child who they'd only known for a year, how they had loved him enough to die for him. Now they'd never see him grow up, or hear about his first kiss (he grimaced as the name "Cho" flashed in his head), or about the first time he flew on a broomstick... It made him feel sick, just thinking about it.
Out of nowhere, Willow stood up and began pulling at her hair, screaming. "Hagrid?" Harry asked nervously.
"Shh... Harry, just watch."
"It's not fair!" She screamed. "Everyone gets to keep their daddy's; why couldn't I keep mine? It's not fair!" She was stomping and thrashing around, beating her delicate fists on the nearest tree. "And she doesn't even love me!" She wailed, tears pouring down her face. "She never loved me! It's always about Ren, or it was about Father. And every time she looks at me I can see her disappointment! It's in every Goddamn line of her face! And she ignores me... and she hates me, I'm just an extra mouth to feed... Father would have loved me... He would have taken care of me... but no, he left... they all leave... and I sit here all alone... I'm so unloved..." She dissolved into tears and slid down to the ground, sobbing. "It's not fair..." Willow cried into her hands. Harry made a move to go and comfort her, but Hagrid held him back.
"Hagrid!" He whispered, sharply. "Let go!"
"No, Harry. We're just supposed to watch 'er." Willow sat on the ground, one leg spread out behind her on either side, tears pouring down her face. She hiccoughed and wiped the tears off of her face.
"Only babies cry..." She muttered, straightening slightly, before again collapsing into tears. "Daddy didn't care... He didn't care... No one'll pick m-me up... even though I've fallen..." It was at least 20 minutes later when her tears finally stopped. She lay still. A cold wind blew and Harry shivered.
"Isn't she cold, Hagrid?"
"Freezin', Harry. She'll be freezing."
"Is she asleep?"
"Yeah," Hagrid nodded, and took off his coat. "Go put that on 'er." Harry nodded nervously, and quietly walked over to where the sleeping girl lay. Carefully, he laid the heavy coat on her, and her shivering subsided. Harry sat next to her and watched her, studying every line of her perfect face. He wanted to touch her, he couldn't help it, the urge was so strong, and he reached out and touched her cold porcelain face. It was smooth and soft, and Harry sighed contentedly.
"Harry?" Hagrid called quietly. Harry turned and looked at Hagrid who was standing between the trees. "Is she still cold?" Harry lifted up the coat a little and touched her arm.
"As ice," He whispered back.
"Well then, go on and lay beside her." Harry looked back confused, and saw a mischievous twinkle in Hagrid's crinkled black eyes. Nodding, Harry crawled in next to her and tentatively wrapped an arm around her waist. Willow sighed happily and rolled over, facing Harry. She mumbled something in her sleep and crawled up closer to Harry, grabbing a hold of his waist and pulling herself closer into his chest. Harry's heart was beating faster than it ever had before, and he looked up at Hagrid.
"Rub her back!" He mouthed. Harry nodded weakly, and began to do so.
"Mm..." She said, moaning a little. Harry ran his fingers through her hair, and she sighed contentedly. She completely melted into his arms and he held her while she slept. Harry watched her sleep, running his fingers slowly and lightly down the side of her face, studying every line, wiping away every tear. The night wore on, and a few hours later, Harry awoke to realize that the sun was rising.
"Harry!" Hagrid called softly. "You have to move! She'll be up soon!" Harry looked up and nodded, slowly pulling apart from Willow. Willow, however, didn't like this, and smacked his arm and pulled herself closer. He laughed quietly as she nuzzled her head into his chest.
"She won't let me go!" Harry called back to Hagrid. Hagrid laughed and walked over, sending small tremors through the ground. He carefully pulled back the covers and tried untangling her arms from Harry's body.
"No, no, no!" She said softly and held on. "I won't let you go... too..." She murmured, and sighed. "Mm... smell... good..." Harry blushed and Hagrid laughed, slowly removing her arms from Harry. He pulled Harry up to his feet before she could grab him again. Hagrid pulled his coat off of her and put it on. They slowly backed away into the woods, hidden from view, when Willow woke up. She looked around, her eyes bleary, and looked for Harry desperately.
"Where'd you go?" She called. "I know someone was here..." She sat up and hugged herself. "Why does everyone have to leave me all alone?" A single tear slid down her face and landed on the ground with a splat. Harry grimaced and looked up at Hagrid.
"I thought you said she liked being alone."
"She does; why else would she come out ter this same spot by herself every day?" Harry looked over at Willow. She sat there, staring at the water, hugging her knees up to her chest.
"I know there was someone here." She said to herself. She giggled. "Whoever it was smelled good... and they were strong... yes, they were strong." Hagrid chuckled and Harry blushed again. Willow sighed to herself. "And they held me... no one's held me before." She looked down at the ground. "It felt good. They were warm; I feel warm." She giggled and stood up, still laughing to herself. "Well, I better go home and shower... or maybe..." She looked around deviously and took off to her right.
"Come on, Harry!" Hagrid picked him up and ran off after Willow, who wound her way through the trees and right into a foul-smelling swamp. Hagrid stopped there and he and Harry watched as she ran from stone to stone through the center of the bog. "I er... I can' follow her, Harry. You're gonna have ter go. Jus'—jus' watch her. Don't let her out of your sight if you can help it. She could be kidnapped jus' like that (he snapped) by a Death Eater." He set Harry down and Harry looked nervously at the huge swamp. "Jus'—jus' run as fast as you can and you'll be fine." Harry nodded and, heart beating, ran across the large swamp, almost jumping from stone to stone as he ran. At the end, he took a huge leap and landed flat on his face on the bank. Harry stood up and brushed himself off, and walked forward. He found himself in a small clearing with a huge tree dead center. There was a cross carved onto the tree, and Harry wondered why it was there. Perhaps she was religious?
Harry continued walked straight, to the right of the cross, and heard her laughing in the distance. Pushing away tree branches and leaves, he saw her sitting on the edge of a creek, her bare feet dangling in the cold water. Slowly, she stood up and pulled off her black tank top, revealing a lacy pink bra. Harry just stared. Willow then pulled off her black pants to reveal matching pink panties. He looked away, embarrassed at seeing that, and then heard her splash in the water. Willow yelped and Harry looked up immediately, afraid that someone else was there, hurting her.
"I-It's f-freezing!" She yelped again, giggling. Jus'—jus' watch her. Don't let her out of your sight if you can help it.Though her back was to him, Harry could tell she was no longer wearing her pink bra, and he goggled at her perfect form. She swept her long hair out of the way and dunked into the water. As she arose, the small droplets fell from her body and sparkled, the sun now illuminating her body. Harry felt his heart jump into his throat, and his stomach was filled with butterflies. "God it's cold in here..." She shivered a little, but continued to wash herself and splash around.
"Hurry up..." Harry mumbled. "Before Hagrid comes and thinks I'm some dirty little boy..."
"Okay, I'm done." She announced to herself, and Harry closed his eyes as she hopped out of the water. He could hear her rustling around with her clothes, and he opened his eyes to see her fully clothed, but putting on her shoes. She was quite the colorful thing, he noted, seeing her mismatched, purple and shocking pink socks (Dobby would be proud, Harry thought to himself), a neon green shirt, black knee-length pants, and yellow converse shoes. He rubbed his eyes, and watched her as she squeezed the water out of her long, black, waist-length hair. She began walking away back towards the clearing where the large tree was. Turning and abrupt left from there, she wove her way in and out of trees and finally, out of the woods. After following her so he knew where to find her, ran back to the bog and yelled across to Hagrid.
"Hagrid! She left the forest! Do I follow her?"
"Yeah! Go! I'll come get you in a half an hour!" Harry nodded and ran back to the edge of the forest and walked out, following her home. They came to a small slope and began walking up it, Harry following, but at least 40 or 50 paces behind her. Every once in a while, he'd dart into a nearby bush, as she often looked behind her, paranoid. Finally, he followed her to a little cottage and noticed that he was quite high up the mountain. He peeked into the window of the cottage and watched her greet a beautiful, nymph-like woman with a simple nod and a grimace. A man walked into the small room and kissed the woman (who Harry had guessed was Willow's mother from their similar faces and bright green eyes) and said something in an exuberant manner to Willow. She merely looked up and glared at him, said something snappily to her mother, and walked out of the room.
"Willow!" He heard her mother yell. "Get back in here and apologize!"
"No!" She yelled back. Her mother followed her daughter out of the small room and tried opening a door.
"Willow En Daelin! Unlock this door right now or you're in big trouble!"
"Don't care!" Willow yelled back. Her mother sighed and walked back into the kitchen.
"Harry, it's time to go." Harry jumped, turning to see Hagrid. He handed him a broken pencil. "3...2...1..." The familiar jerk behind his navel pulled him forward into the howling wind and swirling colors.
