Disclaimer: I don't own final fantasy 8, it's the property of squaresoft. No money has or will exchange hands. However all original characters and storylines are mine thanx.
I'm sorry for the delay on this one, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to update every couple of weeks instead of every week from now on as I have important exams coming up. I will however go back to normal when they're all over, so I will be continuing my story – just a little slower than normal. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter.
"Seriously?" Squall asked, shocked to discover Rinoa's best friend was also her cousin.
"Yep, she's got letters and photographs to prove it, they were in the back of her file." She informed him, as they made their way along the crystal walkways of Esthar, hand in hand. Partly Wishing that she could have been given the photo's her mother received from the orphanage – but at the same time knowing that if they did exist that her father wouldn't let her anywhere near them.
"It explains a lot actually –" and he would have finished that sentence if she hadn't sent him an 'insult me and get it' look, or rather a 'insult me and get none look'. She'd sent it his way a few times before so he knew when to stop.
"And you would have been sisters? Things really would have been different." He commented instead, sounding thoughtful as he considered a different world – a world Rinoa had also imagined.
Where her mother was still alive, Selphie was her sister and life was simpler, the only trouble was she didn't know if she'd have met Squall in that world – she only hoped that she would have done and that they could live together in a simpler time. But she couldn't guarantee it.
"I guess there are something's in this world that we can be thankful for, somethings I would never change." He told her softly and whole-heartedly.
"Me neither." And she tipped her head up to meet his lips gently in a somewhat thankful and reassuring kiss.
"Ahem." The sound snapped them both out of their private world and they carried on, looking slightly embarrassed after the elderly woman sent them a disapproving look – it wasn't even as if they'd been in anyone's way either. 'She's obviously never been in love then' Rinoa reasoned as she and Squall turned the corner before the presidential palace.
He didn't say a word, just gave her a look, a slightly scared and nervous expression across his handsome features. She understood completely and wrapped her arm around his as they made their way on to the transporter that would shuttle them to the president's residence – home of Squalls unknowing father.
"Shouldn't we have called or something – you know to let him know we're coming to see him?" Rinoa asked, trying to lighten Squalls spirits by getting him to talk to her.
He just raised his eyebrows in her direction, "You know as well as I do that he drops everything for visitors – it's a wonder anything gets done." he remarked as they sped upwards, Squall with his file and letter on his lap and a worried Rinoa at his side.
For all her powers she didn't know how this would all turn out and how two people could become the family destiny had stolen from them for so many years.
"Not more diplomats – I can't take another load of false promises from the Galbadian governments about how their prepared to keep the identity of the new sorceress a secret, if I would only confirm the rumour and tell them!" he exclaimed some what angrily, pushing his greying dark hair from his face and not even bothering to look up.
"It's Squall Leonhart and Rinoa Heartilly and apparently they have some important matters to discuss with you." this caught Laguna's attention immediately and he snapped his head up dropping his pen in the process.
"Is there something wrong?" he asked immediately. Squall had only been there twice in the last three years since everything had happened and even then he hadn't come to see Laguna directly – he came to see Ellone. He considered that there could be something wrong with Rinoa, but Dr. Odine had assured him that she was fine now that she knew for certain her powers were white.
"They said it was more of a personal matter." Kiros told him and Laguna's face took on a worried expression, one his friend had only seen twice.
"I'll see them straight away." He decided out loud, standing and quick stepping towards the doors.
The dark man didn't stop him, he just let him go without really knowing if he should worry or not. The look on the young commander's face when he had asked for Laguna had been hard to read and the way he held on to the young sorceress's hand gave him every indication that something important was going on. – He could only guess what it had to do with his friend.
But he didn't get much time to wonder when Laguna ran straight back in. "Ah, kiros could you get those documents to the right side of my desk sent off? They're important thanks." And he was off again leaving Kiros to his duties as presidential aid and his concerns for his friend.
Rinoa watched as squall paced up and down, past the window looking out upon the technological wonders that made up Esthar city. She'd often wondered how so many people were kept from ever finding it, but with the technology that they had and people's fear of the place there was plenty a reason why it had been untouched and isolated.
Infact, the only reason they'd found it was because Squall had carried her there to save her – an action that once she'd learned about touched her heart and gave her hope that he was finding his way in the world – finally allowing himself to become attached to someone.
Now however he seemed dangerously close to regressing and his emotions seemed to be moving in extreme directions. The last two nights he'd held her close to him, not that this was unusual or unwanted – it was just that there was urgency present. He needed to know that he wouldn't be left alone and to some extent that he wouldn't be rejected either.
Then there were other times, in Trabadia and on the Ragnarok when he'd shut off to the world, not wanting or not able to speak or to act, trapped in a fear he couldn't escape. A fear that only the president of Esthar could diminish, she just hoped that Laguna arrived before his son wore through the floor with his pacing.
The door slid open quietly and neither would have noticed if it wasn't for the reflections in the windows surrounding the room.
The older mans eyes looked straight at squall, a worried expression in them, but the younger man didn't know what he should say or do in response. So he just stood there, not quite able to comprehend the situation he was faced with. That the man who stood before him was his father.
"Squall, it's good to see you – you too Rinoa, what's going on?" Laguna asked finally, it seemed that his experience of dealing with uncomfortable political situations was finally paying off.
"I've got some important information for you." Squall answered vaguely, half hoping that his father was enough of a diplomat to spot the hidden agenda. 'Although....'
"Kiros said that it was personal information, so what's going on?"
"We were at the orphanage earlier this week and Edea gave me a letter that you need to read, it's...." he paused, knowing that this was enough to give the game away "It's from Raine."
Hearing his late wife's name mentioned shocked Laguna, why would Edea have a letter from her? Unless... "Does this have anything to do with Ellone? – last time I was there Edea said that she'd already left."
The word MORON formed in Squalls mind but he didn't voice it, instead he thought back to where Laguna was coming from. He could remember the 'dream' he'd witnessed of what Laguna and matron had talked about and knew that he hadn't been mentioned. That only brought up more questions though – had Edea known all along? No came the answer, or she would have done something.
"Squall?" his 'fathers' voice asked again and he realised that he'd left his answer to long.
"I... um, I think that you should just read it." He said whilst thrusting the envelope at Laguna who just stood in a bemused silence.
Rinoa, deciding that they needed to be left alone to sort this out, and that she'd like to speak to Ellone about All of this anyway, walked over to Squall squeezed his hand reassuringly and turned to laguna.
"If it's possible I'd like to speak to Ellone and take a look around."
"Absolutely, but you will be coming back right? It's nice to see you guys here." She nodded and he added, "Talk to kiros and he'll take you to her."
"Thank you." She told him and reached up to kiss Squall lightly on the cheek before releasing his hand and leaving them to talk.
When Laguna looked back to where squall had been stood he noticed he'd gone to stand furthest away from him, with an old blue file in his hand, concentrating on the city below.
"Do you know what this is about?" he asked, but the young man seemed reluctant to answer.
"I haven't read it, so I don't know what Raine wrote in it – all I know is that she dictated it to a friend a month before she died." There was a sorrow in his voice; something that Laguna thought was unusual as he'd always though of Squall as someone who kept his emotions to himself. But he decided not to ask why this particular subject upset him.
Instead he sat himself down, took a deep breath and with trembling hands took out the letter and started to read it as calmly as he could.
'This letter if for the two most important people in my life, may they find it and each other.
Firstly, to my Husband, Laguna Loire,
I didn't know how to start this - or even what I was supposed to say, me not being the writer in this marriage, but then I realised that the truth was the only option.
I love you Laguna and I miss you, but more than that I have something to tell you and someone that you must know.
I'm pregnant, I know it's a shock – it was for me too and I didn't find out until two months after you went in search of Ellone. Now I'm about eight – eight and a half months pregnant so he could be born any day now. It may sound presumptuous for me to say it's a boy but I can feel it Laguna – you are going to have a son.
I also know that it is very unlikely for me to be here when you return. Pregnancy, it seems does not suit me and I am becoming weaker. It is the same thing that my mother died of – only until now I wasn't aware of it. The doctor is very concerned but I am not. I'm happy, strange as it may sound to you, because I know that I'm going to bring our son into the world.
The only people that I do worry about are you, Ellone and our little boy. I do not know if you will return before they send him away. I hear the villagers talking outside my door; they blame you over and over again for what is happening to me, they can't see that this is not your fault and that you had to go and rescue Ellone. They don't understand the danger that we are all in if you don't save her.
It seems I worry so much about you not finding our son, so I have spoken to my friend – the one who kindly agreed to write this letter for me and she says that I should give him a name. I have though about this and decided on Squall. It's a combination of the two of us and it means rain over water, it goes with Raine and Laguna. Clever isn't it?
So all I ask is that you get to know him and to love him. I cannot bear the thought of you never knowing each other, of being alone for the rest of your lives. That is why I am demanding that this letter be sent with him wherever they take him, along with my ring and name.
Please do not blame yourself, just protect our family – they way you have gone off to save Ellone. Although I miss you very much, I think I love you all the more for going after her.
Just know that I will always love you and Squall and that I don't regret a single moment of our time together.
My love always.
Raine.'
"I think the rest of this is for you." He said calmly, before the words of the letter finally hit home.
Squall turned around, not expecting Laguna to make any sort of comment really and not able to move at all.
"Thank you Kiros, Ward. I should be alright now." Rinoa told the two men who'd accompanied her to the other side of the presidential mansion where Ellone lived.
Ward nodded and Kiros bowed. "Our pleasure. Just call us if you need us, we'll be in the library down the hall." The black man informed her and the young sorceress smiled.
"thanks." She said warmly before knocking on the door in front of her and hoping that she could find the help she needed.
"Come in." Ellones familiar voice called and Rinoa did as she asked, stepping in when the doors swished open and then closed behind her. "On hello, it's nice to see you Rinoa – I take it that Squall is with you? I saw the Ragnarok land this morning." She looked mostly the same as she always had, only her hair was slightly longer and kept up in a clip at the back of her head.
"Yeah, he's talking to his father at the moment so I thought I'd leave him to it." Rinoa stated bravely and then waited for Ellones response.
"So he knows then." She said, sounding somewhat relieved and a little defeated.
"They both do. I take it that Laguna didn't know either?" Rinoa asked and Ellone shook her head.
"No, he didn't have any idea at all. When he sent me back to Winhill it was another month before he returned and by then I was gone. He didn't see me again until three years ago and it really wasn't the time then, so to speak." In another circumstance the sorceress may have laughed, but she was too worried about Squall for that.
"You could have said something; you were – until now at least, the only one who knew – Edea had forgotten due to a GF she kept junctionned since she'd set up the orphanage so she couldn't tell Laguna before now... why didn't you tell them?"
Ellone sighed and sat down, contemplating what she should say, what could she tell her that would make any sense? The truth was a little complicated and hard to take. "I just couldn't tell them, couldn't put them through anymore. I love those two more than anything in the world and I don't know how I could have said it."
Rinoa didn't understand what the other woman was going on about, "But it's... why would knowing that they're father and son hurt them?" she asked finally deciding to voice her confused thoughts and she sat down across from Ellone in the sunlit room.
"Because Squall is the reason that Raine died, which means its Laguna's fault too." she whispered preferring to look into her lap to looking at the young sorceress.
"I know that Raine got really sick after he was born – that she was delirious and wanted Laguna to see his son because Squall told me. But you can't really blame them for that, Laguna never knew Raine was pregnant – how could he have done? No letter would ever have reached him in time." Rinoa countered sorting out the events and reasons in her head as she said them.
"No, Raine had a medical condition that she inherited form her mother. The more her pregnancy progresses, the more it made her ill and in the end it killed her. I just didn't see how I was supposed to tell them that, it almost killed Laguna when he found out his wife had died – that's why he stayed cooped up here for so long. It never seemed like the right time to tell him he had a son and who that son was – I could never say it; the blame would have killed him."
Rinoa sat there in silence, replaying Ellones words in her mind. Her intentions had been right but her reasoning was flawed. Laguna already blamed himself for not going back sooner, if he'd known that it was a medical condition that killed his wife then it could have helped. But she agreed that maybe the time hadn't been right, there must have been something in that letter to allay their fears. Only Ellone didn't know about that, but there was something she did know that didn't make any sense given what she'd just said.
"Who told you that?" the sorceress asked.
"Told me what?"
"That finding out his wife had died almost killed him and that telling him he had a son would push him over the edge?" Rinoa asked again, it hadn't made sense to her how Ellone would be so certain that it would play out like that – she said she hadn't seen Laguna again until the whole sorceress mess three years ago and if he wouldn't talk about it...
"I got a letter from the villager who took me to the orphanage a few months after Squall and I arrived there. It said that Laguna, who by then had adopted me, had returned to the village and had been very upset when he found out about Raine dieing. They told me that it had almost killed him and so I shouldn't tell him about Squall because he would only blame himself and he'd die. They also mentioned that he would come to see me as soon as he could, but I left by the time he arrived."
"Who was it?" came the next question, it seemed that the younger of the two knew something that the other didn't and that questions would be asked until they knew what was going on.
"The wife of the shop owner, they used to look after me sometimes and they wrote to me every couple of months while I was at the orphanage to make sure that me and Squall were safe." Ellone said, complying with Rinoa's subliminal interrogation.
"Did they tell you not to tell Squall either?" she asked, this time sounding sad about it.
"Yes. They said that it would cause him too much pain, and as I was supposed to protect him I should protect him from the knowledge that he and his father killed his mother because it was an accident. One that needed to be kept a secret so that no one would be upset." Then she paused and looked directly at Rinoa. "Why, does it matter who told me?"
She shook her head. "No, but it matters that you were told all of that at such a young age. I bet that they kept saying the same things over and over again so that you'd feel like you do now – unable to tell them." She sighed and slummed into the back of the chair. "My father used to do that sort of thing to me. Told me I was weak and needed to be sent away to school so that I was safe from the world – a world that would corrupt me and take me like it did my mother if I wasn't careful."
"I'm sorry." Ellone told her but Rinoa just looked at her.
"They lied to you, made you think that you couldn't tell them so that even when you forgot the letters you remembered the meaning." She stated clearly and watched Ellone shake her head vigorously.
"They wouldn't do that." She defended.
"Yes they would if they thought they were protecting you and Squall from a man who 'killed' their most cherished villager." It was something she'd learned the hard way – her father had thought he was protecting her by doing what he did, the school had been his way of keeping her from the fate of her mother, but all he'd ended up doing was killing part of her inside, the part of her that craved freedom. A part that she didn't really get back until she joined the forest owls and then when Squall came in to her life.
"I – I still have the letters, if you are telling the truth then I think you should see them. We need to know what's going on." Ellone said standing and walking into the room to the left, which Rinoa guessed was the study from what she could see through the doorway.
She also decided that it would be a good idea to stay put until the letters were found, she wouldn't be able to help her find something she'd never seen before. There was also the guilt that surrounded the fact that she'd just destroyed Ellones view of someone who'd looked after her when she was younger. But why had they done it? Why did they hate Laguna that much?
Their actions had only ended up causing more pain in the end – they'd hurt Squall and that she couldn't really forgive, she only hoped that they could be made aware of that they'd caused. But first she had to find out who it was.Again I'm really sorry it took me sooo long to update but I should be able to get the next chap done soon. If you liked it please review so my efforts to do this chapter done go in vain, constructive feedback as always is welcome. Thankyou!!
