I will always love you

Written by: Hoshihikari4ever

Disclaimer: I do not own Fushigi Yuugi.  Nothing belongs to me!

Summary: A reincarnation fic.  Five years after the TV series. Miaka and Taka are a week from marriage.  Miaka walks in on something unexpected, causing them to break apart.  What happens when a person who Miaka thought she lost forever, shows up to comfort her.

Parings: slight Mia/Tama, Tama/Yui, Tetsu/Yui implied, main couple Miaka/Hotohori

Thanks to everyone else who reviewed!!  I really appreciate it!

Author Notes: Sorry guys!  I reposted this, after an error was pointed out, about the story repeating itself.  Besides that…everything else should be the same.

Chapter 5 (Revised)

            A gentle breeze swept through the air.  Sai's hair flutter under the night sky.  Slowly he woke up to the full moon and glistening stars above him.  Another breeze came by causing him to realize the coolness of the air. Standing up gently as not to wake up the sleeping figure on his lap, he stood up and stretched.

            Its beautiful, the night sky, very beautiful indeed.  However Miaka, there is nothing anywhere that can compare to your beauty. You have captured my heart, my soul. Somehow after meeting you Miaka, I feel like I'm whole again, I feel that a missing part of me has returned.  

            Sai picked up the sleeping women in his arms, gazing intently into her peaceful face.

            So trusting she is.  Not many women are like that.  Who in their right mind would go to a strangers house on the first day they've met.  Who in their right mind would act so friendly and perhaps tenderly to a complete stranger.  As far as I know, no one…that is no one with the exception of Miaka.  Miaka she's different, she's different from everyone else.  Everything about her stands out, the amount of food she eats, her personality and beauty are beyond comparison.  Its like she's had me in a trance this whole afternoon.  I swear, if she had asked for anything, anything at all, I would have given it too her.  I would have given her the world if she had asked for it. 

            Silently, he walked back to his mansion, letting his own thoughts consume him.  In less then 10 minutes, he was back inside his mansion.  He turned this way and that through the corridors, deciding a place for Miaka to stay.

            Hmm…where should she stay?  In which room. There are so many possibilities.

            Finally Sai decided on a room next to his own.  He didn't think it was right to share a room, nor was it right, for her to stay too far away.  He wanted her close by.  He wanted them to be as close as possible.  Having her take a room next to his, was as good as he could come up with, or at least for now.

            The door creaked as he pushed it open.  Gently he placed Miaka on the bed, pulling up the covers for her.  "Oyasuminasai Miaka…." He kissed her forehead once before leaving the room.  "Oyasuminasai Sai …" her voiced trailed off.   Sai paused at the door, and glanced back at Miaka, who indeed was still asleep.  He shook his head, quite fascinated by her every movement.   Casting one last look at the sleeping women, he left the room, and went into his own.

* * *

            "Keisuke control yourself.  Why don't we think of this logically?  Why don't you remain calm, perhaps then, we could figure something out…."  "Calm!! How can I remain calm at a time like this!  I have no clue where Miaka is! What if something happened to her?  Tetsuya!  That's my sister!  How can I not remain calm?"  "For heaven's sake!  Miaka's 20!  She needs a life of her own! She can take care of herself!"  "That's one thing that she still can't do!  Tetsuya she's used to people looking out for her!  That's what her past 20 years of life has been about.  You can't grow like that!  She's still too dependent!"  "Dependent?  I think not!  She lived through that life inside the world of the book, inside The Universe of Four Gods.  That has definitely made her mature. She's been through a lot of tough situations, and she's always pulled through.  You should never doubt you sister.  What I think it really is is that you're afraid to lose her again.  Is that what it is, afraid to lose her to some other man, afraid that she'll get suck into some other book, or get into some other trouble…." Kesiuke remained silent.  He knew perfectly well that Miaka could handle herself.  He knew that Tetsuya was right.  He didn't want to lose his sister again.

            I know Miaka can handle it herself.  I know she's grown up.  I know I shouldn't be following her around. Yet why can't I be like Tetsuya and care less, why can't I be like the older brother I should be? Why? Is he correct?  Am I really afraid to lose Miaka, lose my little sister to some book or some guy? Yes, that is correct.  Miaka, I don't want to lose you just yet.  I never really had a chance to be there for you when you really needed it. I never really got the chance to be the big brother I wanted to be, that you hoped I would be.  Perhaps, that is the reason that is the reason why I don't want to let you go…

            Tetsuya waived his hand in front of Keisuke.  The man blinked.  "Hey you in there…you're spacing out…" Keisuke nodded.  "Good, then I suppose we should get started…" "Started on what?"  "The search for Miaka…" "Yes, we should find her as soon as possible…"

* * *

            Miaka slowly awoke.  The smell of food caught her nose and she jumped out of bed.  Her mouth fell open at the sight of breakfast on the table.

            How convenient!  Food!  There's food here.  Food just left here, waiting to be devoured.  It would be a waste if I just let it sit here.  I'll eat and explain later.

            Miaka walked over to the table.  She sat down, and started gulping down the food.

            "Ohayo gozaimasu Miaka… I'm glad you like the food"  Miaka jumped out of her chair.  She had not realized that someone else was in the room.  Looking up she saw a man sitting on the opposite side of the table. He was wearing a robe of pure silk.  His upper chest showed slightly.  Miaka's faces redden.  "Sai…I…I ….I didn't know you were here…I didn't see you….Gomen nasai…."

            Baka Miaka!  You sure made a good impression out of yourself!  How could you not see Hotohori…no…that's not right, how can you not see Sai sitting there and not acknowledge him.  He probably brought you that meal, and you well, you sure ate like a pig!

            "It's quite understandable, quite understandable.  It was quite amusing to watch as a spectator."  "I…I…" Miaka could not speak; she did not know what to speak of it.  Sai smiled warmly, showing that he quite understood.  He picked up the leftover, which there was barely any at all, and ate it, his eyes never leaving her for a second.

            Miaka shifted slightly in her seat.  Being watched that closely made her uncomfortable.  An old feeling one which she thought she lost long ago, started to squirm from within in.  The pair of golden brown eyes, the ones that she could never look directly into without feeling guilty, was too intense for her liking.

            How can he look at me like that? How can those eyes stare into me like that…in a way, in a way…in a way that makes me so uncomfortable.

            Miaka tried to lose eye contact but found that impossible.  She felt that awfully familiar feeling, the feeling that she once felt for Tamahome.  Somehow feeling this way made her very uncomfortable.

            Dam it!  How can he do this to me? How can he make me feel this way.  This feeling…one that I still can't quite put my finger on…the feeling of love…is that what it is? The feeling of being in love…the same feeling that I once felt for Tamahome?  Why…why do I feel like this.  I shouldn't…I shouldn't feel this way.  It's not right.  I just met Sai…I just met him for heaven's sake!  True, he does so remind me of Hotohori… yet, I never had any feelings for the emperor.  Besides he's not Hotohori…Miaka…he's not your emperor…In fact, Sai's only a friend…a friend!

            Yet Miaka felt confused.  She didn't know how or when  these emotions started, which indeed scared her.  She fidgeted again.  Her hunger died down and she just sat there.

            "Miaka, are you alright?  Is there something wrong?"  Miaka vigorously shook her head.  "Sorry Sai…I should be going now…." Sai looked at her with concern.  "What's wrong….is it something I did, that dissatisfied you…?"  "No….no…its not that…Sai…I have to go….I just remember some things that I still need to finish…"  Sai leaned forward, pushing down the table slightly.   "Are you sure Miaka…"  She nodded.  Sai sighed.  "Very well, if you insist…." He took in a deep breath.  "I can drive you home…." He offered.  "Nah, no thanks….I can manage…."   Miaka carefully looked at the man across from her, noting that he did not believe a word she said.  "Sai…really its ok….its just, it just…"  "just what….just that you don't think I'm good enough for you eh…."  Miaka seemed taken aback.  "Just that….just that…you prefer money-loving-geeks, guys who are unworthy of my attention…." Miaka seemed stunned for a moment, both by the harsh and coldness of his tone of voice and what the words literary meant.

            Is this really Sai, or not…could it be an angry, jealous Hotohori…who won't admit me as who I am…but just want torture me by reminding me of his pain?  Could that be his way of getting even with me…?  NO.  No…Hotohori isn't that kind of man, and I bet Sai isn't too…I bet…I bet he didn't mean a word he said…bet that just slipped without him realizing it…

            Sai's voice trailed off as he realized what he had just said.  "Miaka…I…didn't mean that…it….it…just slipped.  I'm sorry I really am…."  Miaka waived off the explanations.  "Sai it's ok…I'm sure that it meant nothing…."  "Please don't hate me for it…or judge me on that…I…I don't know why…or how it happened…it just came out…."  Miaka nodded, and he was relived to see that she did not seem the least bit affected by it.

            "Sai…well I have to go now…."  Sai opened his mouth to speak but closed it, knowing somehow that it would not change her mind.  "Very well…" The two stood up and walked to the mansion's door.  "Are you sure you don't want a ride?"  "Positive…."  He turned to the door and noticed out of the corner of his eye a sword.  Gently he walked over and picked it up, fumbling it in his hand.  Miaka watched silently, as he picked up the holy sword, hoping that somehow this would help him remember.

            "Miaka…don't forget this…."  Miaka took the sword with both hands, and stared at it for a while.

            Hotohori's sword…Thank you…thank you for leading me to your true owner…

            "This sword, was passed down to me by a very close friend….He meant a lot to me…."  Miaka looked directly into Sai's eyes.  "His name was Hotohori…."  A light flashed past his eyes…but disappeared.  "I lost him five years ago…and this is his only possession which I have…."  "I'm sorry…."  "However…"  Miaka placed back the sword in his hands.  "I believe that it is time I return the sword to its rightful owner…."  Sai seemed confused.  "but…I….why me….I do not understand, Miaka….."     "When time comes, you will understand….I'm sure you'll keep this sword safe….perhaps one day its holy power will rise again…."  Sai was utterly confused. "and perhaps one day Hotohori…will return…and when he does…do tell him….do tell this to him for me…." She leaned closer to his ear.  "Aishiteru…Aishiteru…..tell him for me Aishiteru…."  Miaka pulled away from him, and without glancing back she ran out of the door.

            Miaka ran and ran.  There she had finally said it.  Had finally told the reincarnation of her emperor how she truly felt about him.

             

            Gosh!  I said it! Oh my gosh…I just told Sai that I love Hotohori…Oh gosh, how did that happened.  I don't love him, I never did. There's only one man that I love…and that's not Hotohori…Tamahome…Taka…that's who I love, that's the man that my heart belongs to…  Yet what was that about.  Yet, what was it, what was it that drove me to say it…to say that word…If I did really love Hotohori…then why couldn't I have said it straight at his face…said it when I had the chance…If I did love him…then what's the harm in telling him that I loved him.  This doesn't make sense.  Perhaps…perhaps it was a mistake, perhaps it was because I lost Tamahome…and wanted another guy…

Miaka couldn't answer why she had done it.  What had made her, what it was that had driven her to say it. 

Guess I'll go home first.  I could sort out my feelings there.

She searched her pockets for her cell phone but could not find it anywhere.

Where the hell is my phone!  I need to call Keisuke for a ride…

Unable to find her phone, she went to a nearby phone booth.

* * *

            Keisuke jumped when his phone rang.   "Hello, Keisuke Yuuki speaking…."  "Hello Keisuke?"  "Miaka!!!"  He shouted at the phone.  "Miaka, Where the hell are you!  You had me and Tetsuya looking for you all night!"   "I….I…." "Who was that guy you were with anyways!"  Tetsuya jerked the phone away from his buddy, obviously deciding that he could not keep a calm conversation going.  "Hello Miaka…"  "Tetsuya…?" "Yes….Where are you now….?"  "You know that big piece of land, that big piece of private property in Tokyo?"  "Yes…."  "Well, I'm there…."  "Alright….we'll be there in half an hour…"

* * *

            Half an hour later, Tetsuya pulled up in front of Miaka.  Miaka hopped up.

            "Miaka where the hell where you?"  Keisuke shouted as his sister settled down.  "You had us both very worried.  We thought that you might have been in trouble or something…."  "I'm sorry, I should have called….."  "Dam right!  Don't you ever do that again…" Keisuke continued.  "Easy Keis….looks to me like Miaka's perfectly safe and in no harm…just like that guy promised…."  "Who…" Miaka asked..  "Well, when we called you last night….a guy picked up instead….said you were safe with him….and it proves true."  "Sai…."  Miaka whispered softly, but loud enough for the other two to hear.  "Who!!!"  "Sai….I met him yesterday…..along with Chichiri…." "Hold it…did you say Chichiri?  That blue haired monk from the book, your Seishi…."  "Hai…"  "You mean he appeared…." Tetsuya asked excitedly.  "Yeah…him and Sai…though Chichiri….left afterwards…."  "Wait…who's Sai?" "Saihitei Seishuku…I'm pretty sure he's the reincarnation of Hotohori…the emperor of Konan…."  With that Miaka launched into her story, or what had happened.

* * *

            Sai stood frozen in place.  He watched as Miaka disappeared before him.  His body wavered, slightly back and forth.

            What does Miaka mean?  Who is this Hoto~ whatever his name is.  Is he very important to her?  Of course.  She just admitted to me that she loved him…Why though, why tell me?  What does that have to do with me?  She said, or claims that I know him….perhaps I do…but still why tell me to tell him that she loves her….nothing seems to make sense.  Why do I care if this Hoto~ guy loves her?  Why do I give a dam about it.  I just met Miaka…yet…somehow I feel that we've met before…somehow, I have the strangest feeling that I'm not going to like this Hoto~guy in the least bit.  In fact I'm pretty sure that I'll loathe him, hate him…In fact I'm pretty sure.   Why though?  Why? It's simple…I love you Miaka…I know it.  I shall challenge him…Hoto~ and any other guy for your hand in marriage.  This time I won't back down. Somehow…someway I'll show you…I'll prove to you, there's more then one guy out there who loves you.

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            Done!!  Hope you guys like it!  Glad I got it up before Christmas! I'll try to continue soon. Merry Christmas to you all! Remember to Read/Review ^_^